Grandparents Don't Understand

[Bottom-Line]

I'm sure many others of you have this problem. I have a 11 month old who seemed to have problems after we introduced her to wheat at 7 months so she has been gluten free all but a few days of her life. She also has been switched to soy formula. I've been gluten free for the past 3 and a half years. I'm a college student and work and my husband works also. My husband's parents watch her during the day. She's started recently not wanting the baby food so she's been been getting regular table food I prepare for her the night before. We thought she was only getting this but Grandpa said the other day, "Boy, She sure likes that turkey gravy" He tired to tell us it didn't have any gluten in it but it was a package mix. I'm doubt it didn't. I don't think they take it serious. She acted like she didn't feel good last week for several days and we're guessing it was from the gravy. Grandpa got mad and all when we told him she couldn't eat it. Its not anything new, they've known since she was born we were waiting to give her gluten in hopes that she wouldn't have problems with it. Now i'm wondering if other times she's been really fussy it wasn't because they fed her something they shouldn't have. I know what I go through when I eat it, I don't want her to go through that too.

Also every once in awhile she gets what looks to be a boil on her bottom. Usually it shows up with a diaper rash. Could this be a sign for skin irratation due to a food allergy or gluten? She's had 3 or 4 the last several months. And sometimes she also gets what looks like water blisters along with the diaper rash. I don't know if its just simple diaper rash or something else. The doctor looked at the one boil bump after it had opened and drained and it was starting to heal and didn't seem concerned.

[kareng]

I am going to say what you probably know but don't want to confront. You & your husband need to talk to them about the food. Your husband must insist that they only feed her what you send. You need to be prepared to make other arrangements for the child.

[shadowicewolf]

^ along that same thought line, Could you try and get an 'official' diagnosis? Sometimes people are more willing to listen with one.

[Asianmom]

It took a while for my husband's parents to really believe this was more than just a little "thing" that our kids had. My parents knew from when I was a child being diagnosed.Chances are what other person said...that your baby is getting gluten because they may just not understand the seriousness of having celiac. I know our in-laws thought that it wasn't a big deal because they didn't see the gluten attack happen. It was usually after the kids were home for a few hours...then were in so much pain and in the bathroom for hours and sick for days. They weren't around for that part...so it wasn't a big deal. Also it takes a lot of educating to understand what has gluten in it. They thought it would actually say "gluten" on a package if it had gluten...in the ingredients....so they didn't think of the other stuff we have to watch out for. Maybe if you can sit down and share with them the seriousness...what an attack physically does to your intestine, your body, the way you feel...etc. That may help...but if they can't comply...you may need to find another person to take care of her, which may be hard. I have seen other posts where the boils etc were due to gluten attacks. So could be possible that she was exposed at those times. My kids had that too..but they weren't gluten free they were still getting gluten at the time.

GOOD LUCK and many HUGS!!!

[Bottom-Line]

We've started the process of getting her into a daycare, I have a meeting with someone for that in about a week. I've tried to tell my husband she was getting things she shouldn't since I've started back to college after I had her. I think at first he thought I was paranoid or something. This is the first time they said they fed it to her. Before she ever had regular food she seemed to know what real food was. She'd act like she was chewing when she saw food or try to grab for a can of soda. Just little things, I'd tell my husband. I think he just didn't want to get in a fight with them but when they came out and told us we both said they couldn't. His dad got mad at first. We've told them what to look for and what it does to someones body. It took my parents a long time to understand to. My dad thought it was for attention or something. I had headaches nonstop and bowel problems. Then the headaches and all cleared up and he realized I wasn't lying about it all.

[tarnalberry]

This is a confrontation worth having, as non-confrontationally as possible.

They don't have to understand, they just have to do it. Can they watch her in your house? If not, I would suggest having a very clear rule - they are ONLY to give her the foods you bring for her and NOTHING else. If they can't do that, then they are NOT A SAFE PLACE for her and you need to find somewhere else for your daughter. (I know, I know... WAY easier said than done.)

You might also try taking some video of how she is feeling/acting after she comes home and you suspect gluten. Let them SEE what is happening. (Or take her back to their place and stay there for a while and let them change her diapers and deal with her pain.)

[shadowicewolf]

We've started the process of getting her into a daycare, I have a meeting with someone for that in about a week. I've tried to tell my husband she was getting things she shouldn't since I've started back to college after I had her. I think at first he thought I was paranoid or something. This is the first time they said they fed it to her. Before she ever had regular food she seemed to know what real food was. She'd act like she was chewing when she saw food or try to grab for a can of soda. Just little things, I'd tell my husband. I think he just didn't want to get in a fight with them but when they came out and told us we both said they couldn't. His dad got mad at first. We've told them what to look for and what it does to someones body. It took my parents a long time to understand to. My dad thought it was for attention or something. I had headaches nonstop and bowel problems. Then the headaches and all cleared up and he realized I wasn't lying about it all.

Babys mimic what they see others around them doing (like the chewing and such). Just thought i'd comment.

[Bottom-Line]

Babys mimic what they see others around them doing (like the chewing and such). Just thought i'd comment.

Yea I know that. And its possible thats all she was doing but just seemed like she wasn't just minicing. I think its just frustrating. My husband at first said, We'll put her in daycare if they can't be trusted. Now he's going well if it did have gluten in it, it didn't seem to bother her. So we're going to let it drop. When she gets really fussy he just hands her to me. I could make him handle her.

[Jennaand2kids]

I have been dealing with day care not giving my son gluten...if i were you i would do what was mentioned above which is get an official dr's note....because even if later she has to be put in a daycare they will require a drs note and you could get a false negative if she has been gluten free for awhile.....