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Coping With A Gluten Eating Family


Elfbaby

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Elfbaby Apprentice

I am going to try very hard to articulate this correctly so that it doesnt come across wrong.

A little background: I am 23 and recently relocated from Texas. My 8 month old and I are living with my mom, stepdad and sister until I can find a job out here and a place to live.

I am the only one in my family who currently has to follow a gluten free lifestyle. (My mom is going to try it this summer to see if it helps her symptoms at all) but right now, its just me. My mom and stepdad are very understanding and are trying to be very considerate where food is concerned right now. My sister, not so much. What brought this whole thing up was breakfast this morning. I had gotten a bread mix for my birthday (which clearly I cannot eat now), so my mom made it for the rest of the family for breakfast. She had asked me how I felt about it first and I told her that I was fine with it, it wasnt my favorite flavor anyway, and it was going to expire if she didnt bake it. As we were all sitting around and they were eating the bread, my sister decided that it wasnt enough for breakfast. She said she wanted to get some blueberry muffins. I asked if we could try out a gluten free recipe that I had found and she flat out said no. (She was buying the supplies so I cant argue with that). They then decided to just get sausages and eggs instead and left for the grocery. They returned with... blueberry muffin mix.

I dont know how to accurately explain how I am feeling. Its like, I don't begrudge her the muffins. I don't feel like she should have to eat gluten free just because I do. But I do feel like she left me out. I just quietly got up and took the baby into our room for a nap. My mom told her that she had been inconsiderate and she became rather belligerant. My mom covered my toaster for me, to protect it from flying flour particles, which was very nice. I feel like, it would be different if I had something similar in there to eat, but we grocery shop at the beginning of the month and by the time I was diagnosed, there wasnt actually much money for food. We got a couple of things to get me through, but wont actually get groceries till Tuesday. I have actually made up my mind not to say anything... but, it is bugging me, because I made myself gluten free peanut butter cookies which my sister ate and fed to her boyfriend, but, not only did she not consider me this morning, she actually made a conscious decision to leave me out.

I don't know. I am probably overly emotional due to hormones or something and blowing this way out of proportion. Its just new and hard.


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cahill Collaborator

I dont think you are over reacting at all!

How old is your sister??

shadowicewolf Proficient

Sounds like your sister is a major brat <_< (no offence intended)

Regardless -sigh- those who don't have issues tend to think it is an inconvinence to themselves and, will always do what they wish regardless of how someone else feels. It sucks, i know. An example (not the same but similar): my grandmother made this big poofy dinner rolls this morning. Both her and my mom thought it would be a good idea just to eat it where i couldn't see it (i was in the living room they were in the kitchen). But you know what? I didn't let it get to me :) instead i went and got some of my gluten free french toast i had frozen and had that :)

Long story short, its just one of those things that need to go in one ear and out the other and not let it affect you. Yes it hurts, yes it was rude, but is it worth getting upset for? No, not really.

Also, hide the cookies next time you make them (leaving a few for them of course). Good luck :)

Elfbaby Apprentice

I dont think you are over reacting at all!

How old is your sister??

She is 19. She still has a bit of growing up to do. (Who doesnt?)

I think if I were a little bit farther removed from gluten, it wouldnt be so bad. I feel 300% better than I have since 2006, so, I'm not even tempted to cheat, and pouting is not my style, so, I think I just need to find something yummy that I have all the ingredients for and make it for lunch.

Jestgar Rising Star

Well whatever. You show up at her house, monopolize her parents, you have to have all the attention, you have some special sickness which lets you look fine but get special food. You think you're so special and everybody has to for things for you and she's having blueberry muffins whether you like it or not because she is special too.

so there.

Marilyn R Community Regular

Especially with money being so tight, I think your sister is showing an amazing amount of disrespect for you and your food. I'm impressed that you didn't clobber her when she and her boyfriend ate your gluten-free cookies. Yay for you!

(And boo to her selfish behavior.) <_<

It seems like you are non-confrontational, which is a great quality, but in MHO you're going to have to have to confront her in order for things to improve.

Here's a starter...(hands on hips, loud voice)...

"Love ya sista, but you need to understand that I have a DISEASE and my safe food is SACRED to me. Please do not, under any circumstances, eat any of my safe food. Not even a potato chip! Get it?" She'll probably get P.O. and whine to your mother, but it might sink in.

Good luck,

The Food Nazi

Marilyn R Community Regular

Well whatever. You show up at her house, monopolize her parents, you have to have all the attention, you have some special sickness which lets you look fine but get special food. You think you're so special and everybody has to for things for you and she's having blueberry muffins whether you like it or not because she is special too.

so there.

LOL!!! Perfect! :)


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cahill Collaborator

Here's a starter...(hands on hips, loud voice)...

"Love ya sista, but you need to understand that I have a DISEASE and my safe food is SACRED to me. Please do not, under any circumstances, eat any of my safe food. Not even a potato chip! Get it?"

I like this VERY much :D

elfbaby remember to someone that is celiac, food(how we eat)IS our only medication .

If your were on a life saving drug and she kept it from you ,how would you react ??

Essentially when she messes with your food and your food consumption she is interfering with your life saving medication.

I understand she is new to this too, but it is your health she is messing with.

kareng Grand Master

Sounds like it's your mom & her husbands house. You & your sis are grownups living there. Sounds like they are also buying all the food. Might be up to your mom to set some rules in her home. If someone doesn't want to follow them, then someone can go elsewhere & support themselves.

Might talk to mom about what is and isn't acceptable in her mind. She may find your sis's behavior OK and want to keep her in the house.

Elfbaby Apprentice

Well whatever. You show up at her house, monopolize her parents, you have to have all the attention, you have some special sickness which lets you look fine but get special food. You think you're so special and everybody has to for things for you and she's having blueberry muffins whether you like it or not because she is special too.

so there.

Hmmm. I can totally see her thinking all of these things except the "lets you look fine" part. The rash that I had from eating gluten... I wouldn't go so far as to say that it was disfiguring, but she used to say that I could play a half demon on Angel because of the way that my hands, arms and legs looked. (I was pretty darn scaly and blistery). The rest of it though, probably spot on. We just found out that she bought candy for everybody too. Crunch bars obviously, because she knows I can't eat those.

When I went out to make lunch, my mom informed me that neither she nor Bruce had eaten any of the blueberry muffins because they thought she was being cruel and then punched the air and said "Solidarity sister!" Which made me laugh.

I have to hope that my sister will come round. We tried to kill each other as kids a lot, but our relationship had been much better since I moved back to the state. We have even taken a couple of college classes together. Here's hoping she gets over whatever I did to piss her off!

RachelisFacebook Apprentice

Don't take this the wrong way (or do), but it sounds like she's being a whiny brat (though I have another b-word in mind). I'm 18, and if my older brother had this and I didn't, I would support him. Instead, it's the opposite, and he supports me. Sounds like you need to give her a good punch in the face (that would be my reaction, at least).

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