Non-celiacs

[fisharefriendsnotfood]

This happened a while ago, but I have to say it:

I was with friends, and they were all eating cake, etc. I was eating a gluten-free brownie and this girl asks to try it. I give her a taste, and she puts in in her mouth, SPITS IT OUT, and goes, "Eeeeeeeeewwwwwww! That's so gross, how do you eat that? It tastes like cardboard!"

I was very hurt by this, especially since my mother made me the gluten-free brownies. I thought they tasted good, but evidently I'm missing something. I've been gluten-free since I was two, so I don't remember the taste of "regular food."

Also, I hate when people say, "Oh, I think I'd die if I couldn't eat wheat."

Don't make it harder for me.

Sorry,

-Jackie

[Jnkmnky]

This happened a while ago, but I have to say it:

I was with friends, and they were all eating cake, etc. I was eating a gluten-free brownie and this girl asks to try it. I give her a taste, and she puts in in her mouth, SPITS IT OUT, and goes, "Eeeeeeeeewwwwwww! That's so gross, how do you eat that? It tastes like cardboard!"

I was very hurt by this, especially since my mother made me the gluten-free brownies. I thought they tasted good, but evidently I'm missing something. I've been gluten-free since I was two, so I don't remember the taste of "regular food."

Also, I hate when people say, "Oh, I think I'd die if I couldn't eat wheat."

Don't make it harder for me.

Sorry,

-Jackie

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

You should really learn to deal with it. You can't change how other people act, but you can change how you react. If their stupid comments make the diet "harder" for you, you need to toughen up. Kids make these comments to my seven year old celiac now, and I tell him the same thing. If a kid tells you they think they'd die if they couldn't eat wheat, tell them that's probably why God gave you the disease and not them.... He knows you're tougher. If you don't put a light-hearted spin on comments as simple as those, you're doing yourself a disservice. It's your disease, you deal with it. Others won't because they really don't have to.

[mommida]

Hey Jackie,

Wow that's pretty insensitive for someone to say. You are human. Feelings get hurt by insensitive comments. You're not going to eat rat poison, even if it tastes good. It isn't the first time or the last time you are going to have to deal with ignorance. You will find your own way of dealing with narrow minded people.

Laura

[debmidge]

Jackie, that girl was rude, but you're still young yet and you're going to run into a lot of people who are like her. Maybe she just wanted attention that day. I've had gluten-free brownies and they were great (I am not celiac, and these brownies were just like wheat ones). Don't dwell on it and try to forget about it. People like that don't deserve a second thought.

D.

[nettiebeads]

This happened a while ago, but I have to say it:

I was with friends, and they were all eating cake, etc. I was eating a gluten-free brownie and this girl asks to try it. I give her a taste, and she puts in in her mouth, SPITS IT OUT, and goes, "Eeeeeeeeewwwwwww! That's so gross, how do you eat that? It tastes like cardboard!"

I was very hurt by this, especially since my mother made me the gluten-free brownies. I thought they tasted good, but evidently I'm missing something. I've been gluten-free since I was two, so I don't remember the taste of "regular food."

Also, I hate when people say, "Oh, I think I'd die if I couldn't eat wheat."

Don't make it harder for me.

Sorry,

-Jackie

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

You obviously have a very caring mother who has also brought you up right. Maybe you can look at it from a different point of view - Feel sorry for the girl because she doesn't have good manners. But I know it doesn't make the hurt go away, but as you get older you will learn to realize that there will always be insensitive boors out there and focus instead on the people that make you feel good when you are with them.

But I'm sorry you did have that experience, but you did the right thing in coming here to discuss it.

Hope you have a great weekend!

[skoki-mom]

Blech! Well, that just confirms my belief that kids are cruel! I don't mean "kid" as in little kid, I know you are a teenager, teenagers are probably the worst. I still remember some of the cruel things said to me during those years. Like the previous poster said, feel sorry for that girl because she obviously has no manners. I have no idea what she was trying to prove by that malicious comment. Probably trying to gain attention for herself. Sorry your feelings got hurt, though.

[skoki-mom]

Just wanted to add, when they say "I'd die if I couldn't eat wheat", just say, "yeah, you probably would, you aren't as tough as me"

Actually, I've had a lot of my adult friends say stuff like "I'd die", and I just say "no you wouldn't". lol

[fisharefriendsnotfood]

You obviously have a very caring mother who has also brought you up right.

Hope you have a great weekend!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Thank you.

Thanks for all your kind thoughts. I appreciate them!

-Jackie

[Billygoat]

Maybe you could just say, "God I would just DIE if I had insensitive table manners like you."

But then again, I often get in trouble for my sarcasm, so don't take my advice.

[MySuicidalTurtle]

I bet she only said that because she knew it was different. When I give people brownies or cookies I make they usually can't tell the difference and even ask for more. Once I had a batch of cookies I messed up a bit and thought were gross but my non-Celiac friend thought they were great and ate most of them. I think when kids aren't open minded it sucks for us. I bet that brownie tasted awesome! Especially since it was homemade.

[Guest nini]

it probably tasted bad to that girl because she obviously has no taste!!!! (LOL!!!!) I couldn't help myself!

Seriously, when someone says "I'd DIE if I couldn't eat wheat" you can always say, "Yeah, But I'D DIE if I did eat wheat. Wheat Kills!!!!" ROTFLMBO!!!!

You are so lucky to have a mom make homemade brownies for you, and I bet they were delicious! Most of the gluten-free food that I make and serve to non gluten-free people, usually gets rave reviews and I get people asking for my recipes!

I made an awesome chocolate chip crust, chocolate chip cheesecake today, e-mail or pm me if you want the recipe

[mytummyhurts]

When I hear people say "I'd die if I couldn't eat wheat" it kind of makes me feel freakish, but on the other hand it makes me feel good too because I can't eat wheat and I'm able not to and I'm doing pretty good. (Except for the occasional depressed times.) So it makes me proud of myself, that I am able to handle it alright. My boss told me that he was impressed with my will power because I'm always turning down his licorice and other gluten filled treats he brings around. That made me proud of myself that he noticed.

[skoki-mom]

You know, I really haven't found willpower to be much of a problem, much to my surprise! I've tried the old weight loss diets before and I never got very far because I just had zero willpower. But with this, I just think "I can't have it", and it's over. It's not that I don't ever see/smell food that I'd like to eat, because several times a day I think "gee that looks/smells good!", I just haven't had much difficulty turning it away. Like the fact it's medically forced on me sort of takes the willpower out of the equation. And I wasn't even sick from eating it! I find it quite strange really.

Then again, I may have to totally change this whole post tomorrow when my mom arrives for Thanksgiving dinner with her famous absoloutely to die for buns that I can't have for the first time.............

[PicturePerfect]

Some people are like that. Unfortunatly, WE have to deal with them. Just make sure that it doesn't bother you. I know, it's hard, but let it go. Writing it on here was a good way of doing that. I don't like it when other people try my food, because I know it doesn't taste as good as theirs. But, I let them try some anyway, because every once in a while they say, "Mmm, this is good." Actually my friend wanted some gluten-free kitkat bars for her birthday because they were better than the regular kind! lol

[pixiegirl]

Its not just a teenage thing... this summer when I was visiting family I had stopped at Whole Foods on the way to my sister in laws house, where I was staying for 5 days. There was a bunch of family there and they tasted some of my gluten-free stuff I had for myself and they did the same thing... ewww this is gross, how do you eat that. I just looked at them and said well, I like it. But I was surprised... maybe not quite hurt but surprised they said that.

However later on... my sister in law (she made a lot of comments about how gross the food was and really she is usually a nice person) and I were staying up late talking and the wine I bought had run out so she says to me... "Susan I'm really cutting back now, I'm going to make my severence package last as long as possible". (she quit her wonderful job of 20 years and is unemployed for now but has had good offers and really can go without working for a few years) So I say OK. She says I don't drink expensive wine any more. I say, "ok". I'm no wine snob.

Well I sit down to gossip with her and taste the wine. Choke! I look at her and say, you've got to be kidding me. I get up and go in the frig and its a huge bottle that cost 2.99 I start laughing and say I can't believe you made a comment about my gluten-free food and then go on to drink this junk. We both had a good laugh and I popped her in my rental SUV and went to the liquor store on the corner and bought her some drinkable wine. We laughed the whole way there. To this day I'm still teasing her about it and we both start laughing so hard when it comes up.

The moral of my story I guess is have a sense of humor, don't take things to seriously, live life fully every day, don't stress over the small stuff.

Susan

[Goliadman]

Maybe you could just say, "God I would just DIE if I had insensitive table manners like you."

But then again, I often get in trouble for my sarcasm, so don't take my advice. 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

hahaha,,I'm sort of like billy. Sarcasm is sometimes a good thing to hit insensitive people with. Unfortunately, we live in a country full of bad people who say ugly things. About all I can say here is that you just have to avoid them, and fend them off as peaceably as you can, and move on. I have a daughter who is slowly dying. She has been ridiculed and abandoned by so-called friends too. Some should pray if she dies, for I might still be alive.

[CeliacMe]

That is SO not right to tell her to "deal with it" she deals with it everyday. According to your post you are gluten-free "since reading dangerous grains", you don't HAVE TO BE. If your food touches something with gluten you dont get sick and feel miserable so a long time after. I feel tired for WEEKS after being glutened. This is a place for people to come to in order to feel a little bit better about having to deal with the gluten world at large. We can't enjoy conveniences in life like fast food or most packaged foods, we have to trek to stores that may be out of the way in order to get "normal" food such as bread, pretzels or snack bars. When someone does something mean or says something or is inconsiderate about my condition or the food that I have to eat, it hurts my feelings. I dont see the difference between that and people making fun of someone in a wheelchair.

You should really learn to deal with it.  You can't change how other people act, but you can change how you react.  If their stupid comments make the diet "harder" for you, you need to toughen up.  Kids make these comments to my seven year old celiac now, and I tell him the same thing.  If a kid tells you they think they'd die if they couldn't eat wheat, tell them that's probably why God gave you the disease and not them.... He knows you're tougher.    If you don't put a light-hearted spin on comments as simple as those, you're doing yourself a disservice.  It's your disease, you deal with it.  Others won't because they really don't have to.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[cinda]

I honestly don't think people think. My mom cooks every Sunday, this was the first time she cooked for me gluten-free. She spent the whole day making homemade sauce, and me my own special version. she was so sweet to do that. I'm still experminting with things so I tried some gluten-free pasta. Rice pasta, lol. I sat down next to my sis in-law and she is so outspoken, she takes one look and says, "ewwwwwwwwwww that looks gross!" Then stared at me until i took a bite. It wasn't great, it wasn't good. I would have died rather than tell her that tho. I smiled and said "mmmmmmmmmm" Thank god for my mom and her cooking because the sauce was yummy, the pasta on the other hand lol. It made me feel strong tho. Hard to explain, but i was proud of myself. I think tho as I try things here and there it will get better. Some things good.. some things bad. Thats part of life tho right . The sweet with the sour.

cin

[dogear]

Jacky,

Teenagers will often say the things they say, because they are teenagers, and like to pick on anyone who is different.

When I was a vegetarian at about your age, kids would always make all kinds of comments about how gross, tasteless, and boring my food was. But really, they were truly just saying that to task the "vegetarian girl" for doing things differently.

So if that kid says you brownies tasted "gross" they probably were going to say that no matter what it tasted like, or they had it in their heads and weren't unbiased tasters.

I've found the gluten-free brownies and cookies are on average about as good as the wheat varieties. There's variation within, to be sure. But having gone gluten-free, more or less voluntarily as an adult, less than a year ago, I already feel that the gluten-free varieties of bread, brownies, pasta, pizza, cake, cookies, and more are the *real deal* and the wheat ones are the cheap and crappy imitations. I don't ever want to go back to eating wheat unless the only alternative was to starve to death. I miss absolutely nothng, and I enjoy food about 100X more than I did as a wheat eating excitotoxin fed little rat, and obsess about it a lot less.

It is true that things might not taste "exactly" the same. But having traveled a bit, I've learned that even wheat bread tastes different in every country. In fact, all the wheat breads in the US certainly, and most in Europe are vastly and enormously inferior to what most self-respecting Russians see as the minimal acceptable standard for civilized human beings. In fact, next to this minimal standard for your typical Russian is so high that it makes the best French bagettes, look no different from Ener-G Tapioca loaf.

Having myself gotten used to Russian standards for bread once, and then having to re-accept the American ones. Well going gluten-free, was no harder in the "Do you like your bread?" department than that!!!!

In fact, I've found that my own milleranth mix, is much better at producing a nearly Russian standard sort of sweet white bread than anything I've accomplished with wheat.

[dogear]

As for the "I would die without wheat" sort of comments, people tend to say these things out of a sort of self-deprecation. Of course, it's not polite to say such things, but it's often why people say them-or sometimes even just think them.

I used to think such things but never say them because it would have been seen as rude, all the time. Part of me had wanted to go gluten-free, since 1998. But another part, felt I couldn't do it-because to my own mind I had no self control. I also feared that it would mean in effect an Atkins diet-and I've never been much of a meat eater. In those days, I never felt in control where food was concerned. Never. I felt like food controlled my life completely and totally. And unlike the usual pop-psychology it was never like the saying "food is your best friend". Actually it was my worst enemy. A part of my almost wished that I could have a digestive system like Darth Vader and never eat again, I hated food so much, and never enjoyed it one tiny little bit. (I also felt that going gluten-free without a specific celiac disease diagnosis would be morally wrong and my two fridnds who have celiac disease would hate me and never want to talk to me again for it-which would have been totally out of character for both of them.)

But one fine day, an excitotoxin free diet-almost as demanding as a gluten-free diet in the contemporary USA actually-became the only way I could prevent severe obesity, uncontrollable weight gain, and five panic attacks a day that refused to respond to medication. It turned out that after three days, I felt in control of food for the first time in my life. I was extremely happy, and keeping a vigorous elimination diet was a tiny price to pay.

So after that I got more rational about the gluten-free diet. For a while, I was afraid to tell anybody about it. But I like my gluten-free diet and feel better because of it.

[Jnkmnky]

That is SO not right to tell her to "deal with it" she deals with it everyday.  According to your post you are gluten-free "since reading dangerous grains", you don't HAVE TO BE.  If your food touches something with gluten you dont get sick and feel miserable so a long time after.  I feel tired for WEEKS after being glutened.  This is a place for people to come to in order to feel a little bit better about having to deal with the gluten world at large.  We can't enjoy conveniences in life like fast food or most packaged foods, we have to trek to stores that may be out of the way in order to get "normal" food such as bread, pretzels or snack bars. When someone does something mean or says something or is inconsiderate about my condition or the food that I have to eat, it hurts my feelings.  I dont see the difference between that and people making fun of someone in a wheelchair.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Everyone is dealing with something. Wheelchairs, celiac, arthritis, blindness, weight, mental, ... every breathing person on the planet has something they can point to. It is right to tell her to learn to deal with it. Life is much easier if you aren't reduced to self-pity over your challenges. Your hurt feelings are not going to help you in any way. You are not going to change the world. You need to change yourself and your reaction or you will be doing yourself a disservice. There is no realistic way to get through life with Celiac Disease or in a wheelchair without running into some insensitive comments. The best thing to do, is get a tough enough skin to deflect the "hurtful" comments/stares and move on. The problem is actually with the rude person, not with the celiac. She needs to feel confident about that truth. It really is the best thing for you to learn how to do. As for what I highlighted in blue... I'm a mom of a celiac child. No need to tell me about "conveniences in life" that are disrupted by being Celiac. I may not have the disease clinically...but I live it daily.

[paw]

In fact, I've found that my own milleranth mix, is much better at producing a nearly Russian standard sort of sweet white bread than anything I've accomplished with wheat.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Your Russian style bread sounds interesting. Would you like to share your recipe and flour mix? You could either post it or PM me.

Thanks!

Jackie, I am sorry your friends are clueless sometimes. Part of that is being a teen, and part is just rude or ignorant. I hope they learn better manners soon. In the meantime, don't bother to share your treats with them!

[Nantzie]

Just because someone comes on a board where there are other people who are going through the same thing every day, to rant about someone who did something insensitive doesn't mean she doesn't have a thick skin. She's been dealing with this since she was two. I think that guarantees a thick skin. All I had when I was a teenager was braces and glasses, and the kids at school practically ate me alive. To have a disease that grown people and even some doctors don't understand when you explain it over and over, and over and over (and over) again, while you're a teenager, takes a lot of strength and a lot of class.

[fisharefriendsnotfood]

  To have a disease that grown people and even some doctors don't understand when you explain it over and over, and over and over (and over) again, while you're a teenager, takes a lot of strength and a lot of class.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Why, thank you! I can't believe that everyone is debating about me and my post- how exciting lol! I feel so important.

Thanks very much everyone! I really appreciate everything that you've said and it's helped me alot.

Jackie