Rant About Kids At School

[Smunkeemom]

So, my 4 year old who is newly gluten-free (it's been almost 3 weeks today) eats breakfast at school, I was worried about cross-contamination so I decided to bring her own gluten-free breakfast for her everyday.

problem? The older kids are giving her crap about how it is "unfair" that she gets the food she gets. (the kids in her class understand that she is on a special diet and leave her alone about it)

Friday I brought her gluten-free cereal a banana and orange juice. This kid in the fourth grade, who is well known as a whiner and a bully, starts telling me how it's unfair that he doesn't get orange juice and bananas.

I went off........."well, it isn't fair that Kathryn can't eat Lucky Charms, or brownies, or twix, or chocolate milk, or blueberry muffins either, but she got over it, and so can you!!!" (all of those things were on his breakfast tray)

He was crying now. He said "all I want is fruit"

and I apologized and said "ask your parents to buy some at the store, tell them instead of candy this week you want fruit"

now fast forward to today, when I bring Kathryn in to breakfast, she has strawberries, bananas, milk, and gluten-free cereal bar.

That kids mom is in there griping at me, about how not everyone is "rich" like me and can't afford bananas and the free breakfast is all she can get him......

we had to go to the principals office because I was really mad

I asked "where did you get the $$ for the brownie and the muffin he has every morning on top of the school lunch, and the candy bar he eats for breakfast every morning? and the soda he has today? You could have taken that money and bought fruit, sure strawberries are expensive but apples and bananas aren't"

she says "it isn't any of your business what I feed my kid"

to which I responded "and it isn't any of your business what my kid eats either."

GRRR.

where did people get this idea that life has to be fair, life isn't fair. I wish people would grow up and figure that out.

sorry for the rant, but now I have to meet with a mediator to "solve my issues" with this parent tonight instead of spending time with my kids.

and lets face it nothing annoys me more than going to do something I don't want to when I could be spending time with my family..........

[bluelotus]

You should have told the lady that bananas are cents on the pound....they're the poor man's fruit. Jeez. Ignorant parents are scary - makes me a bit concerned as to what the future generations will be like. Poor kid is probably constipated to all hell if he never gets to eat fruit

[Jnkmnky]

Good Lord... you made a 4th grader cry? I think you need to chill-out. Teach your child to deal with any issues that arise in a more pleasant way. There was no reason for your behavior. The fact that you're now meeting with a mediator over your outburst shows how unreasonably you handled this situation. You're right about one thing... Life isn't fair. You're going to have to learn to deal with it better yourself. You created the problem.

[skbird]

This is astonishing because I am so impressed a 4th grader wanted fruit instead of Lucky Charms. I think hell just froze over.

Stephanie

[mommida]

The older kids are giving her crap about how it is "unfair" that she gets the food she gets.

I went off........."well, it isn't fair that Kathryn can't eat Lucky Charms, or brownies, or twix, or chocolate milk, or blueberry muffins either, but she got over it, and so can you!!!" (all of those things were on his breakfast tray)

He was crying now. He said "all I want is fruit"

and I apologized and said "ask your parents to buy some at the store, tell them instead of candy this week you want fruit"

The kid wants it all and the mom thinks that is just fine? Sorry to say, I 've seen that before. You've got to remember that attitude came from the home. You will never get anywhere with that situation. Be sure to let the parent know their child made his/her wishes known to you (wants fruit) and you told the child to tell their parent. Sorry for the inconvenience. (Talking to her kid must be such an annoyance.)

As for a kid starting to cry after their little body has been so abused eating ALL that JUNK, who is stunned by that? Who wouldn't be sick after eating a meal like that?

My advice to you is don't say much of anything else. Let the other mother do all the talking and prove what a joke of a parent she is. Then ask why the school isn't offerring fruit as a healthy alternative.

Laura

[Smunkeemom]

Good Lord... you made a 4th grader cry?  I think you need to chill-out.  Teach your child to deal with any issues that arise in a more pleasant way.  There was no reason for your behavior.  The fact that you're now meeting with a mediator over your outburst shows how unreasonably you handled this situation.  You're right about one thing... Life isn't fair.  You're going to have to learn to deal with it better yourself.  You created the problem.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I know, the more I have thought about it today, the worse I feel (not that they were right, but I was way wrong to do that) I need to give that kid a real apology that he understands that I screwed up.

I was just getting so frustrated with them calling her names (like B**ch) and saying that she is a snob because she gets "special food"

in retrospect I could have dealt with it like an adult and not only set a good example for my daughter but for the other adult in the situation as well as the other kids that were around.

thank you for being so honest. sometimes you need a friend that will point out to you when you are wrong.

[mommida]

I know, the more I have thought about it today, the worse I feel (not that they were right, but I was way wrong to do that) I need to give that kid a real apology that he understands that I screwed up.

I was just getting so frustrated with them calling her names (like B**ch) and saying that she is a snob because she gets "special food"

in retrospect I could have dealt with it like an adult and not only set a good example for my daughter but for the other adult in the situation as well as the other kids that were around.

thank you for being so honest. sometimes you need a friend that will point out to you when you are wrong.

Who is watching these kids? Why on earth is such language being allowed in school? Honestly, there are major problems with schools. Do you think you can reconcile with the other parent and work together for a healthy breakfast menu. Gluten free kids would love the oppurtunity to be able to buy a snack or lunch from the school, "just like the other kids". This kid wants fruit too.

Laura

[Rusla]

I do hope when you sit down with this parent and the school.That you make it crystal clear in no uncertain terms that if your daughter eats what they eat that she could eventually end up with stomach cancer and die. The thing is this would have never happened if the school had been on top of this and why are they allowing kids to call names and bully her. Saying that maybe you went off in the wrong direction is a good thing but then you wouldn't have had to if the school had done their job and not been negligent. The school, who I imagine is well aware of her medical condition I attribute to at least 75% of the blame and I will give that other parent a lot of blame in this too for not explaining to her child some people have medical conditions that require special diets.

That other parent had no right either to come off on that and declare that you are "wealthy" and trying to be a snob. She should have been bright enough to figure out that your child was eating what she was eating for health reasons while, she was busy feeding her child crap. A chocolate bar is more expensive than fruit. A soft drink is more expensive than juice or water, she is busy poisoning her kid, and rotting his teeth with candy bars and pop every day and they wonder why obesity and diabetes is on the rise.

Perhaps they should have a qualified health nurse speak to the school about why some people have to have special diets for their health.

[Guest gfinnebraska]

Good Lord... you made a 4th grader cry?  I think you need to chill-out.  Teach your child to deal with any issues that arise in a more pleasant way.  There was no reason for your behavior.  The fact that you're now meeting with a mediator over your outburst shows how unreasonably you handled this situation.  You're right about one thing... Life isn't fair.  You're going to have to learn to deal with it better yourself.  You created the problem.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

IMHO THAT was a little harsh... true or not... it was harsh. We all lose it every once in a while. When we vent about it, we need to support one another in a positive way. Whether she was right or wrong, opionions need to be given in a kind, loving way. Was it necessary to make a 4th grader cry? No. Was the 4th grader right in what he was doing? No. But we need to let Smunkeemom know she can vent without being attacked. Okay? Thanks!

[ianm]

I think you missed an opportunity to explain to the 4th grader about celiac disease. My son has a classmate with celiac disease and the other students get it completely. They jump right in to protect this kid when some dopey adult tries to force feed him something made with wheat. When people start whining to me about my dietary restrictions I see it as an opportunity not an attack. I overwhelm them with so much information that most can't help but get it. The ones that don't get it. their brains implode and they shut up.

[Jnkmnky]

IMHO THAT was a little harsh... true or not... it was harsh.  We all lose it every once in a while.  When we vent about it, we need to support one another in a positive way.  Whether she was right or wrong, opionions need to be given in a kind, loving way.  Was it necessary to make a 4th grader cry? No.  Was the 4th grader right in what he was doing? No.  But we need to let Smunkeemom know she can vent without being attacked.  Okay?  Thanks! 

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I do not answer to you. I do not support grown women who berate and insult 9 year olds. She "vented" on a child. She better not expect to come here and find ME supporting her behavior. I won't. Okay? Thanks!

[Smunkeemom]

I think you missed an opportunity to explain to the 4th grader about celiac disease. My son has a classmate with celiac disease and the other students get it completely. They jump right in to protect this kid when some dopey adult tries to force feed him something made with wheat. When people start whining to me about my dietary restrictions I see it as an opportunity not an attack. I overwhelm them with so much information that most can't help but get it. The ones that don't get it. their brains implode and they shut up.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

yeah I screwed up big time. I was mad, and stressed out, and felt that my kid was being attacked and I didn't act like the person I am. I made a writen apology to the kid and his mom, and the school, and a public apology to the kids that were in the breakfast room. I am so ashamed. I let my stress over other things (like my best friend being in the hospital) make me into the kind of person I really really don't like.

Thanks for giving me perspective so that I didn't go into mediation and make more of a fool out of myself

[ianm]

I commend you for your actions. It speaks volumes when someone can swallow their pride, admit they were wrong and apologize. Hopefully you can find a way to turn this around as use it as an opportunity to enlighten everyone about celiac disease.

[Smunkeemom]

I brought apples and oranges for her lunch table today I think the kids like me again

[VelezLA]

So, my 4 year old who is newly gluten-free (it's been almost 3 weeks today) eats breakfast at school, I was worried about cross-contamination so I decided to bring her own gluten-free breakfast for her everyday.

problem? The older kids are giving her crap about how it is "unfair" that she gets the food she gets. (the kids in her class understand that she is on a special diet and leave her alone about it)

Friday I brought her gluten-free cereal a banana and orange juice. This kid in the fourth grade, who is well known as a whiner and a bully, starts telling me how it's unfair that he doesn't get orange juice and bananas.

I went off........."well, it isn't fair that Kathryn can't eat Lucky Charms, or brownies, or twix, or chocolate milk, or blueberry muffins either, but she got over it, and so can you!!!" (all of those things were on his breakfast tray)

He was crying now. He said "all I want is fruit"

and I apologized and said "ask your parents to buy some at the store, tell them instead of candy this week you want fruit"

now fast forward to today, when I bring Kathryn in to breakfast, she has strawberries, bananas, milk, and gluten-free cereal bar.

That kids mom is in there griping at me, about how not everyone is "rich" like me and can't afford bananas and the free breakfast is all she can get him......

we had to go to the principals office because I was really mad

I asked "where did you get the $$ for the brownie and the muffin he has every morning on top of the school lunch, and the candy bar he eats for breakfast every morning? and the soda he has today? You could have taken that money and bought fruit, sure strawberries are expensive but apples and bananas aren't"

she says "it isn't any of your business what I feed my kid"

to which I responded "and it isn't any of your business what my kid eats either."

GRRR.

where did people get this idea that life has to be fair, life isn't fair. I wish people would grow up and figure that out.

sorry for the rant, but now I have to meet with a mediator to "solve my issues" with this parent tonight instead of spending time with my kids.

and lets face it nothing annoys me more than going to do something I don't want to when I could be spending time with my family..........

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[VelezLA]

I understand your frustration, it is obvious that part of the issue is unawareness about celiac disease as well as food allergies in general.

It is easy to say, but we need to be very patient... I would like to suggest sharing with school members information on celiac and how critical is for anyone with this condition to adhere to a gluten-free diet. The school should also participate in this education effort, otherwise you will be constantly arguing with kids and adults.

Comunication and education are very important....

Good Luck!