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Familt Act Like Celiac Is No Big Deal?

erin24

By erin24
in Coping with Celiac Disease

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erin24 Explorer
erin24
Posted

Maybe I am jumping the gun b/c my blood test results are not back yet but...

Anyone have friends and family that act like Celiac is no big deal. "Ohh, the diet won't be that bad...I know someone with it and he/she will eat stuff every once in a while, you just can't eat bread". I guess I am not taking this lightly and I am kind of discouraged by my family telling me these things. They think gluten is only in bread adn do not realize that it is in practically everything. I want them to support me in having a 100% gluten free diet (if I have it) and not make it difficult by not accomodating/understanding my situation.

Anyone feel this way or am I just being overly sensitive?

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penguin Community Regular
penguin
Posted

My mom was supportive for the most part. We were in the same part of the country and she went shopping at Wild Oats with me. When I was being tested, she said, "but I read that you can get cancer and all of these other horrible things, you can't have that. Besides, it's genetic blah blah." And then she remembered my dad was adopted and we don't have a clue about his family :rolleyes: My mom knew about the pain and anemia, but she didn't know until I was being tested that I had D every day. Now she asks me about my poop a lot, which is the exact reason I didn't tell her when it started. <_<

Recently she told me I was diagnosing myself, even though I just had an official dx

She kind of goes back and forth from "are you sure about this" to "well, maybe that's what's making you sick." I don't think she can wrap her brain around the fact that my dietary restrictions are permanant.

It's hard on the family too, since it impacts them as well. Holidays, birthdays, family dinners, etc. I think in time my family will come around, right now it just seems like this nutjob thing. Hopefully your family comes around, especially if you get glutened around them.

I know I get sicker from gluten than I did just a month ago.

Good luck! :)

wolfie Enthusiast
wolfie
Posted

I don't think you are being too sensitive at all. This is nothing to take lightly and is more complicated than your family understands. If you do test positive, maybe give them some material to read or educate them on foods you can and can't have.

My Mom/Dad are super supportive, as is DH. My sister, on the other hand, wasn't at first and is still a little hesitant. She says things like "you can just pick the croutons out of your salad" and others along that line.

Hang in there! You are doing the right thing.

Kim

Guest Robbin
Guest Robbin
Posted

I've been struggling with the same issues with my family--mom is supportive, husband is supportive, sons and sibs are not. Even one of my closest friends who is a nurse is skeptical about it. I am getting very, very sensitive to gluten since going gluten-free as well. My friend said the other day that there is no way just touching it or using it in shampoos can cause a reaction. (I had told her my old shampoo caused sores in my scalp, itching and hairloss). This is from a life-long friend. I guess I just make this stuff up so I can pay a fortune for foods, cosmetics and skin care products, not to mention the fact that diarrhea and rashes are magically gone! I'm glad this forum is here because I think I'd start to go nuts....Hang in there, all you can do is take care of yourself and maybe when they see such a difference in your health and energy, they will come around. I'm hoping for that for myself too! :unsure:

tarnalberry Community Regular
tarnalberry
Posted

Perhaps you can get them to take it seriously *and* not have it be a big deal. In our house, it's not a big deal - there's no production over it, and it's not a high-stress sort of thing. But we take it seriously - keep my husband's bread to one small area, and inform stay-over guests to keep crumbs out of the way (and expect them to do so). Of course, that gets easier as you get used to the diet.

floridanative Community Regular
floridanative
Posted

Only gluten for almost six weeks. I'm glad my family is 5 hours away. They would never understand you can't just pick the coutons off a salad. I don't think it would matter if I told them ten times it was like poison, some of them just wouldn't get it.

I think it makes family members really uncomfortable for many reasons. They don't want you to be really sick so they downplay your condition, they don't want to be really sick so they want to act like it's no big deal. And lastly, people in general don't like change of any kind. Since my dx people have looked at me like there is no way someone can survive without pizza and bread. It's like they can't deal with it as well as I can. I'm eating too much gluten-free stuff now - brownies, pancakes blah blah. So far I'm only doing without abdominal bloating and a good Kripsy Kreme doughnut!

erin24 Explorer
erin24
Posted
  • Author

Thanks for the encouragemet. I don't think anyone can really understand until they have the stomach and all of the other problems and know how miserable it is. Wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy :)

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CMCM Rising Star
CMCM
Posted
Thanks for the encouragemet. I don't think anyone can really understand until they have the stomach and all of the other problems and know how miserable it is. Wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy :)

I really think most people tend to take their "cues" from you. So, if you are knowledgeable, determined and purposeful, also matter of fact yet firm about what you will and must do in terms of your diet, people will mostly accept that. If you are not firm about it, that leaves an opening for other opinions and people will sense your indecision and weakness. You have to really know what you are talking about and what you plan to do. Most people are followers, after all. And most people back down when they encounter firmness of opinion, especially when it concerns knowledge which they themselves lack. Know your stuff, be strong, be firm, don't argue about your actions. :)

heli Newbie
heli
Posted

Erin - My family has been supportive because I was so sick and now I'm well. When people seem so aghast that I turn down pizza and they say, "What can you eat?" I very nicely (which is hard sometimes) name all the wonderful healthy foods that I can eat, and mention that I make my own bread. I came to the point that I can literally give up any food to feel better. i have a bunch of wierd IgG delayed food reactions so, I have given up a lot. However, "Nothing tastes like feeling good!"

munchkinette Collaborator
munchkinette
Posted

My mom takes it very seriously for ME. I've been trying to get her to go gluten-free though, and she hasn't taken that very seriously. I'm going to help her this weekend when I go home. She just feels too stressed to check all the labels for "natural flavors". She's been eating a lot less wheat and she'll cook/buy whatever I ask when I visit, but I don't think she's serious for her. I bought her Dangerous Grains. :)

The funny thing is, I thought my dad would be the one to think it was all bs, but he took it more seriously than I expected. Guess why- because it's my mother's fault. :P When I asked him about HIS side of the family's health history he thought I was full of it.

debmidge Rising Star
debmidge
Posted

And your response is "Yes, you're right - it's no big deal because I know I'll have my family's full support and love. My foods will just not contain gluten and we may have to do things a little differently for me from time to time. But with everyone's love behind me I know it'll work out."

"My friend said the other day that there is no way just touching it or using it in shampoos can cause a reaction. (I had told her my old shampoo caused sores in my scalp, itching and hairloss). This is from a life-long friend. "

Don't you hate contrarians? (people who have to disagree with you on everything - you say black they say white).

I guess then she doesn't believe in fragrance allergies either. My husband has celiac disease with DH and I've seen the difference when he went gluten-free in everything. Less DH to almost none. As for me, I have such bad fragrance allergies : I've reacted to Paul Mitchell products, some lipsticks, lip glosses, some shampoos -- leaves my skin like I have DH (but they are contact dermatitits). But I guess that isn't possible either. Of course it's possible. Anything that the body sees as a foreign substance and it will react to it if it's sensitive to it.

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