Fiance

[Nantzie]

Yay!!

Nancy

[jenvan]

Again, thank you for all of the responses. We have had some good conversations. I think he is starting to understand what I need from him and how important this is for me, so this is good. I have also decided to start cooking more, so this should make things easier.

Nicole--

That's good news! Stick with it and keep him accountable...meaning, make sure he keeps "getting it" and caring for you well. Oh--and I don't mean "getting it" like sex--but in understanding you and the situation

[AndreaB]

It's good to hear that you two are working on this. Communication is one of the foundations of a good marriage. If you can work through this it will help set the tone for other sensitive things that may come up. The important thing to remember is to consider one anothers feelings. In most things it's not my way vs. your way, but a mutual understanding and common ground. Celiac has to be your way as far as the diet though, no cheating on that.

[jkmunchkin]

Nicole--

That's good news! Stick with it and keep him accountable...meaning, make sure he keeps "getting it" and caring for you well. Oh--and I don't mean "getting it" like sex--but in understanding you and the situation

ROFLMAO!!

[Daxin]

I would like to add that my DW was skeptical at first as diagnosis was hard, and we almost had to insist on some tests. She thought it was all in my head...and she has a diploma in nutrition management!!

However, she now makes bread for me, and has begun experimenting with cakes, and we are talking about making our whole hose gluten-free as well.

I hope your finace can understand how serious this is, and that is most ceratinly NOT in your head. I say this because I am one...Guys CAN be insensitive! He may not fully understand what you are going through. I had a hard time when my doctor was telling me all the things that were going to have to change, and I did not want to believe it about myself. This is a disease which IS hard to understand. Just be patient w/ him. If he truly loves you as much as you say, he WILL come around.

I wish you both the best, and a long happy life together.

[penguin]

Nicole--

That's good news! Stick with it and keep him accountable...meaning, make sure he keeps "getting it" and caring for you well. Oh--and I don't mean "getting it" like sex--but in understanding you and the situation

That's really funny! My local newspaper is running an ad campaign that is all about "Austin gets it" or "my grandparents have been 'getting it' for 50 years" or "I love 'getting it' when I get home after a long day at work" It's all very suggestive

For a couple weeks, there were just these ads everywhere for "do you get it?" without what the ads were for. Very effective

www.austingetsit.com

[2kids4me]

It is great that he is coming around. My husband has been supportive - but it only started after he did some reading too. You see, I had done research and taken the kids to doctor appt while he worked - he didnt have the background info I had. It wasnt until he came to the pre-biopsy appt and the GI showed him pictures of damaged villi and had celiac explained by a doctor - then he started to "get it". Plus he is "concrete thinker" and has to see to believe. Drives me nuts sometimes. When the biopsy came back conclusive for celiac - he really came on board - he is more shy than embarrased about asking re: ingredients when we eat out...but he does do it.

It might be a revealing conversation to find out why he is becomes embarrased - does he feel self concious about the attention by the staff, were either of his parents the type that liked to draw attention to themselves, but he hated it when they did? okay, enough psychobabble...

If you have certain restaurants you like - what about going in and talking with the chef about the menu - find out how thngs are prepared and also ask if it would be easier to let the restauarnt know in advance -eg: you make reservations, tell them who you are and that you have celiac and the chef is aware of your dietary needs (?) Sometimes advance plannning means less questions at the table.... there are also restaurant cards that you can give to the waitress to show the chef.

Good for you to start preparing more meals at home, lots of fancy meals you can make (mmm twice baked potatoe..... lamb chops with wild rice... going gluten-free doesnt have to be boring...

[jenvan]

That's really funny! My local newspaper is running an ad campaign that is all about "Austin gets it" or "my grandparents have been 'getting it' for 50 years" or "I love 'getting it' when I get home after a long day at work" It's all very suggestive

For a couple weeks, there were just these ads everywhere for "do you get it?" without what the ads were for. Very effective

www.austingetsit.com

Ha ha! It would "get" my attention I'll ck that site out!

Oh--the magnets were my favorite: http://www.statesman.com/getit/content/get.../magnetslrg.webp

[ms-sillyak-screwed]

My fiance says he believes that the gluten intolerance is all in my head. -- He also thinks I should go to a holistic MD to get a medication that would allow me to eat gluten. I try to explain to him that this doesn't exist, but he says it must and I just don't know about it.

The main issue is that he has grown tired of me having to ask questions at restaurants. We eat out almost every meal. When I ask more than one question, he gets embarrased, annoyed and sometimes angry. He tells me it seems like I am an old lady when I do this. I feel that he is causing me to get glutened at times because I feel discouraged in asking enough questions to assure that my meal will be safe for me. I feel unsupported.

Mr. Knucklehead Fiance is in for an eye opener when he finds out celiac disease kills.

My NEXT HUBBY is going to be a GASTROENTEROLOGIST. Don't laugh - I really mean it. So he can grown old listening to me ask questions at restaurants just to punish him and his buddies until they do something about celiac disease. I will torture him, it will be easy.

I was going to suggest making him go w/ you into the bathroom... but you don't seem to have the molten acid volcanic explosions I have when I am glutened. THAT would make anyone believe that celiac ain't in my head!!

The smell or foul stench of steatorrhea diarrhea is enough to make someone a believer. But does Mr. Knucklehead Fiance have the guts to really L-O-V-E a celiac?

[gfp]

It might be a revealing conversation to find out why he is becomes embarrased - does he feel self concious about the attention by the staff, were either of his parents the type that liked to draw attention to themselves, but he hated it when they did? okay, enough psychobabble...

Whoah there ... you probably made some of the best observations!

It could be he is embarassed by the attention or it could be he is put out by you getting the attention or he could just be selfish and be upset his dining out is limited.

If its the former then this can be handled to an extent by going around first and explaining qand dropping off a small information leaflet ...if he want the attention then let him do the explaining .. I have a good friend I eat out with often and he always likes to be the onbe doing the explanation ... if its the latter your stuck with it..