The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

[Jestgar]

Morning Jess

Hi Jules!

[flourgirl]

(*snort*!!!)..... sometimes I think I was MORE sensible when I was fifteen ..... I seem to be gettin' PSILLIER the older I get!!

That's one advantage to getting older!!! You don't have to give a damn hoot about how you appear to people.....you're too old to be "shy" and don't embarass as easily. For myself, I have accepted the fact that I am never going to be a 1)beauty queen 2)klassy and so-fist-uh-kated 3)concerned with fashion 4)anyone but who I am ..... and if someone doesn't like it they can stuph it. I like me........just as I am (thank Gawd, I'm too tired, too old, too whatever to fix it now!!)

I, for one, am VERY glad for the silly psillies!

[Jestgar]

Alright. I've had a very long, difficult week. Came home late most days. This means I've got a weeks worth of dishes in the sink, and at least a cat's worth of fur all over my floor.

I expect to be scolded soundly if I'm here any time in the next two hours (and lightly reprimanded if I show up within three..).

[Judyin Philly]

Evenin Sillies

Judy, just saw this post. I was thinking about you today and I'm so glad to hear you had a good appt. This doc sounds like a real winner, glad he took the time with you. Hopefully he will get to the bottom of things

You guys have me giggling over the Penis museums in Texas....because yes, natch, everything is so much bigger in Texas

Thanks Julie..starting a new abx to see if it helps...lets cross our fingers and toes. Told him the GI was 'gone'

Hi all

sunny day here but chilly

Patti has a new assignment to hunt up the P nuseums in Tx.

HA bet Mark is happier in Texas as we all know things are bigger there.....as it's been said here before

Good Morning, Gang!

'Tis a day of laundry, of cleaning, of prep for DD's after-the-fact birthday party (nine fifteen-year-old girls descending - - hold me tight) . .. ....they will all squeeze into the ho'tub, shrieking and splashing. I think I will try to get in with them.

Need you here for my large laundry piles........sigh. . . . ..

God Em and Patti and Nikki and obsession with laundry.

I guess i need to go some where to get some clothes dirty other than 'garden dirt'

Mark's new favorite expression......

I hear ya on the laundry, girlphriend.....I had all of our travelling laundry PLUS two weeks of dirty clothes from Mark's lil' corporate apartment...... Someone's obviously never heard of a laundromat.....

me thinks you have a laundry fetish. yep what's a laundry mat.........my son calls from one on

Sundays.......... wish i could send him a set but can't hook up in the apt

I'm making some headway--the company sent a very nice girl over yesterday afternoon to help me unpack and get rid of the excess boxes and paper. That was a huge help, since I was all alone literally "boxed" into a corner

I have me Berk's on and me pheet are so happy

patty got a helper to help unpack...........you lucky duck........

and your Berk's on.............now those 2 events = HAPPY

(*snort*!!!)..... sometimes I think I was MORE sensible when I was fifteen ..... I seem to be gettin' PSILLIER the older I get!!

tis a good thing Nik

must go get dirty...uck in yard.

Patty.....at least your cleaning is clean & NEW 'stuff'

[Jestgar]

God Em and Patti and Nikki and obsession with laundry.

oh crap. AND I have laundry.

[DingoGirl]

Um - is it still morning, Sills? methinks not......I got up early, starting watching a movie, went back to bed, slept until noon

It was delish

and.......I had this dream - OMG - - I moved into a very dark, depressing, and large house.....no fence for Weez and squirrels and raccoons running wild on the streets......filthy kitchen coated with sticky glutenized food remains on everything (this may have to do with the disgusting "wine glass" I was holding at a pub last night - they had none left as they'd all broken on St. Pat's day and so - it was actually a sticky water goblet :gag: ) Very ugly coloUrs and a depressing dark orange carpet........I was crying at living in this place in my dream....

but in this house, the prior owner had left really huge, large display objects I had to unload, and I was so overwhelmed at the thought of it that I cried....for example, a six-foot tall bottle of Harley Davidson wine Too heavy to carry and too rancid to drink, yet somehow I had to get all of this stuff out of there, or move, and the thought of both made me cry....

what does it mean? it this from the Phallus Museum? Or Padt moving to Texas?

Need Leesargh to do dream analysis for me

My fall back job, if grad school didn't work out, was always herding sheep in Wales..

was she serious about this? I could move to Wales, but no herding of sheep - too hard and cold

apt did go well. He gets me for sure. He'll write my 25 year history to give to a new Dr. Told him i fired the GI. Said she tested me for everything......no answers but all tests OK............anxiety it is........

Judith! is this good news or bad? wasn't sure what you meant exactly

TEA - goose poop! my gawd it is disgusting and copious......just keep yer shoes on whilst walking yer grounds

adn Padt's in Texas doing laundry with her Berks on!!!!!!!! Well now, why WOULD Mark clean his clothing when he had the Laundress Extraordinaire arriving to take care of it

Jules with packing for two weeks for just two days - gawd, know it well *gulp*

HI NIKERLER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Poeter

just what kind of work will y'all be doing.....?

*snort*

Emm - how's it going in the ho'but??? (<---- I just reversed the letters and decided to leave it ) Are ya hanging out w/ the 15-year-olds? dear gawd....I think you SHOULD put the crutch tip in there, and see if they pay any attention to it.....my guess is no one would give it a second thought.......so - I think you have to put summat in there that would just BOGGLE their wee minds what could it be???? The Man Head would have been good, only I believe he's staying wif yer friend?

Alright. I've had a very long, difficult week. Came home late most days. This means I've got a weeks worth of dishes in the sink, and at least a cat's worth of fur all over my floor.

I expect to be scolded soundly if I'm here any time in the next two hours (and lightly reprimanded if I show up within three..).

it will be impossible to stay away......just ask me........I think we call this Pulling a Soozle, don't we?

well - I must head off to grocery store.......furious about it, I dunno why.......and, am feeling premenstrually binge-full There's just no telling what I"ll come home with, and eat the entire contents of

[psawyer]

well - I must head off to grocery store.......furious about it, I dunno why.......and, am feeling premenstrually binge-full There's just no telling what I"ll come home with, and eat the entire contents of

Happy shopping! We just got in from running errands including the grocery store.

[nikki-uk]

and at least a cat's worth of fur all over my floor.

Is a cat's worth of fur MORE than a weeks worth (me thinks t'is) ???

HA - I see EM...is the partay still kicking in the 'ho-but??

[elye]

oh crap. AND I have laundry.

HEY! HEY!! You get back to your jobbies, Missie!

Pahteeee's got her Birks on! I can picture them . . . . ..!

what does it mean? it this from the Phallus Museum? Or Padt moving to Texas?

Well, that six-foot wine bottle sure sounds like a symbolic reference to our Penis Museum.......

I have the BEST idea, Psillies. We are all going to meet, somehow, sometime, in Hussavik, Iceland, at the Phallological Museum for our Psummit. It should be our goal - - I am going to look into tourist information (hell, what more do we need but a penis museum?), and I have the name of an Icelandic gentleman who we will absolutely be be bringing into our fray. Mr. Pall Arason is to be an honourary Psilly:

Although the museum does not yet have a Homo Sapien specimen, in the interest of advancing phallological knowledge, a patron (P

[Jestgar]

Is a cat's worth of fur MORE than a weeks worth (me thinks t'is) ???

:ph34r: busted by a fellow cat-lady

I'm going i'm going...

[DingoGirl]

SIllies - OMG [DRAT! emoticonally busted]

I'm back from the store and I have ice cream AND potato chips.....full-sized bag.....it is highly possible I could finish a significant portion of both today.......am thinking of taking the chips over to Perfect Neighbor's house - - she will not be able to REMOTELY conceive of the idea of having no self control - - I do recall that one night, in a drunken party over here wiht a few friends (I think it was in the month of December, 2007), I rang her up to see if she had any chocolate or treats as......we could nae drive to the store.

She had bags of candy left over from Halloween..........

Trying to think how this could possibly happen.....just can't get my wee dingo brain around it

But when I take care of her dog, I always see that there are many leftover, lingering bags of things (and bottles of wine) that she never touches.......

dear GAWD to have that life of no wild cravings (I asked her, she doesn't even crave sweets at all)

Well, that six-foot wine bottle sure sounds like a symbolic reference to our Penis Museum.......

I have the BEST idea, Psillies. We are all going to meet, somehow, sometime, in Hussavik, Iceland, at the Phallological Museum for our Psummit. It should be our goal - - I am going to look into tourist information (hell, what more do we need but a penis museum?), and I have the name of an Icelandic gentleman who we will absolutely be be bringing into our fray. Mr. Pall Arason is to be an honourary Psilly:

Although the museum does not yet have a Homo Sapien specimen, in the interest of advancing phallological knowledge, a patron (P

[Jestgar]

Dishes washed - all of 'em

Stoves cleaned - 1

Sinks scrubbed - 2

Frigs cleaned - 1/2 (I'll get there)

Floors swept - 3

When I went into roomie's room to sweep the floor I discovered that the cats have peed on his bed, so it turns out that I have a LOT of laundry to do

[elye]

WHHHHHAT? Perfect NeighboUr has WINE just taking up space on shelves?? Untouched? Undrunk?? 'Tis something I truly cannot fathom . . .. ...

dear GAWD to have that life of no wild cravings (I asked her, she doesn't even crave sweets at all)

Mygawd, she is a monster.. . . .....no sweet or alcohol cravings -- this is unnatural, methinks bizarre and dangerous. . .. ..

x 10 OMG, is he single? I'll give him a call today Penile affidavit

Yes! A Penile Affidavit - - this man is worthy to be our leader.....A Grand Penis Poobah. . ... ...

I wanna say, you did NOT have this conversation with the people on the bus.....

Well, I did NOT speak of these things with the people on the bus, just the shuttle driver....I remained perched on the front seat, leaning in on him and yapping away. Sophie and Jack were in the back two seats, distancing themselves as much as could be afforded. During this outing, there was only one other person in the van - - a strange-looking young woman with her ipod on, looking vacantly out the window. . .. .....crap, she could well have known all kinds of things about crutch-tips, and their catalogue of coloUrs. Why did I NOT ASK HER??

And yes, I do have his email address. I think I should give it to all of you, and it would be superb if you could all email him. Reiterate my ho`tub story, explain how you were all there for its unfolding, and for gawd`s sake, tell him that BRICK-COLOURED CRUTCH TIPS EXIST!!

What kind of weirdo is he?? Not believing that crutch-tips were at one time this coloUr??. . .... .

Why on earth was he so....certain of such a thing??... .. . . . . ..

[JNBunnie1]

Treesuh, have you tried scattering dried blood or having le hubby urinate around the yard? Those are two things I've read that will scare off deer. Also a dog.

[DingoGirl]

Yes, that infamous crutch-tip. I will have you all know that I told the entire crutch-tip-found-in-the-ho'tub story to the shuttle van driver that was working at our hotel in Toronto. Yep, the whole thing....how it was lying in the bottom of the tub after we drained it in the spring, and no crippled/disabled people anywhere near our house. . . . ....he was an older man, and just stared at me.

BUT, as he was driving us down Dundas Street, a lady with crutches crossed slowly in front of us.

"Hey", the driver suddenly piped up, "was it like one o' those tips?" And it was NOT - - these tips were BLACK, and the errant tip in my tub was BRICK-COLOURED, as you all recall. Our driver then began to argue that there has never been brick-coloUred crutch tips.

I mean, vehemently insisting, as if I were lying, or somehow coloUr-blind, or delusional.

Was he some crutch-tip afficionado?? So bizarre.....I kept insisting, and so did he. Nope. No such thing. Never has been.

He was SO certain, he actually had me second-guessing myself. .. . ...is it really brick-coloured? Is it more a dark brown, or grEY?

SO: I am emailing him a photo of my tip, as told him I would. It is SOOOOOO brick-coloUred.

Motre brick-coloUred than a brick, methinks.

:lol: Just wanted to highlight this passage again.......have put the things in red that reeeeeeeeeeeeeelly make me larph and larph :lol: x 100

and LOVE the fact that a woman on crutches passes by, and they actually discuss the colours of crutch accoutrements

*snackle*

Dishes washed - all of 'em

Stoves cleaned - 1

Sinks scrubbed - 2

Frigs cleaned - 1/2 (I'll get there)

Floors swept - 3

When I went into roomie's room to sweep the floor I discovered that the cats have peed on his bed, so it turns out that I have a LOT of laundry to do

Jess cleaned the FRIG!!!!!!!!! OMG - what in hell - this is NOT adviseable - you are not to even TOUCH that thing :lol:

WHHHHHAT? Perfect NeighboUr has WINE just taking up space on shelves?? Untouched? Undrunk?? 'Tis something I truly cannot fathom . . .. ...

Mygawd, she is a monster.. . . .....no sweet or alcohol cravings -- this is unnatural, methinks bizarre and dangerous. . .. ..

:lol: monstrous and dangerous, my neighbor

Grand Penis Poobah

Well, I did NOT speak of these things with the people on the bus, just the shuttle driver....I remained perched on the front seat, leaning in on him and yapping away. Sophie and Jack were in the back two seats, distancing themselves as much as could be afforded. During this outing, there was only one other person in the van - - a strange-looking young woman with her ipod on, looking vacantly out the window. . .. .....crap, she could well have known all kinds of things about crutch-tips, and their catalogue of coloUrs. Why did I NOT ASK HER??

And yes, I do have his email address. I think I should give it to all of you, and it would be superb if you could all email him. Reiterate my ho`tub story, explain how you were all there for its unfolding, and for gawd`s sake, tell him that BRICK-COLOURED CRUTCH TIPS EXIST!!

What kind of weirdo is he?? Not believing that crutch-tips were at one time this coloUr??. . .... .

Why on earth was he so....certain of such a thing??... .

dear gaaaaaaaaawd :lol:

Yes, a barrage of emails from your Sills, with the headline reading:

brick coloUred crutch tips, and other cogent musings of Psillyville

*snort*

I am just chortling away here at this madness. All alone, evidently..........except fer Bunnie......Hi Bunnie!......WHERE IS EVERYONE??????????? Do you people have lives?????????? :harrumph:

Treesuh, have you tried scattering dried blood or having le hubby urinate around the yard? Those are two things I've read that will scare off deer. Also a dog.

I would wager that Tea has already had her telehubby pee-ing all over the yard

[JNBunnie1]

I am just chortling away here at this madness. All alone, evidently..........except fer Bunnie......Hi Bunnie!......WHERE IS EVERYONE??????????? Do you people have lives?????????? :harrumph:

I would wager that Tea has already had her telehubby pee-ing all over the yard

I had my life all day and now I'm done. Dinner's almost ready, so I'm frittering at the moment.

P'raps Treeessa should try peeing everywhere herself. Maybe man pee won't do it.

[flourgirl]

Treesuh, have you tried scattering dried blood or having le hubby urinate around the yard? Those are two things I've read that will scare off deer. Also a dog.

Thanks, Bunny, but I've tried just about everything. Dried blood, check. Moth balls, check. Irish Spring soap, check. Human hair....check. Very expensive Liquid Fence....several times....the smell makes me want to barf, and it lingers a while, but does NOT last for 3 months. The deer just laugh and munch away. I can't afford to spend that kind of money for weekly spraying of an acre of gardens. I have not yet coerced Telehubby to mark his territory. I know it works for skunks and other pests, but I'm not sure it'd work for deer. Just think of the VOLUME we'd need! Besides that, I'm playing in the dirt almost daily from spring until snowfall.....can't say I like the idea of handling THAT!

I'll keep researching and trying stuff. Who knows? I will NOT put up an 8' fence around the property (would look kinda tacky, and rob me of much needed light), and I really don't want to put mini fences around all of my plants.....One of these days a real brainstorm will hit me, hopefully not a lightning bolt.

[elye]

Treesuh, have you tried scattering dried blood or having le hubby urinate around the yard? Those are two things I've read that will scare off deer. Also a dog.

Um, and also me.... . . . ...

P'raps Treeessa should try peeing everywhere herself. Maybe man pee won't do it.

HEY!! We need Joooodeee and her Orange Jug!! She fills a week's worth at a time - - crap, that'd cover Tareeeesuh's entire front AND back lot!

[flourgirl]

Forgot to mention that my neighbors have dogs.....3 of them. They do have a fence around the back yard for the dogs to play, and they have gardens (and birdfeeders.....so lucky to have them for my neighbors!). The deer do jump over their fence and snak on those plants.....even with dog urine and feces about. Apparently that does not deter them either.

*SNRKxzzzz*...Bunny! I can't really picture me squatting here and there in the yard to pee! It would have to be when its dark....and it's still so cold I would not even be able to! (Maybe in the summer ). The old bladder would just shut down...."uh uh baby...it's frikken kold out here"

[Jestgar]

I'll keep researching and trying stuff. Who knows?

[flourgirl]

That was kool, Jess. I did think about some kind of motion activated sound device. Maybe water would work!

[DingoGirl]

Oops

Y'all probably thought I was writin' a novel but.....was overboiling some edamame on the stove

mighty overcooked, they was

then had to go out and transplant some violets, this gorgeous white variety has really been profuse this year, did nae know they were that coloUr

must finish my movie now...........got nowt else

more later Sills!

[DingoGirl]

TREESUH!!!!!!!!!!! Judith's orange yer-ine jugs, THAT IS THE ANSWER!!!!!!!!!! I am quite sure she can ship them to you!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hell, maybe all sillies can pee in jugs for a week and then send it? PSILLIES PULL TOGETHER WHEN NEEDED!!!!!!

I certainly am not modest, would pee all over yer yard. Just pay for me plane ticket, I'll give you a week's worth of wee. would that be cheaper than sprayin that expensive stuff all over yer yard??? You just need to feed and house me, with one dingo and one Kitteh We are very charming and will provide you with tons of entertainment. And Weezee LOVES her some deer, saw them at our friends' house in Monterey phrequently.....

what about a nice, wire screen fence, the kind they had in Monterey, with wooden posts and.....did it have wood beams on top? can't remember.....was quite nice looking, as I recall, did not obfuscate the forest beyond it.....

[Jestgar]

So my crappy day at work culminated on Thursday with me sitting in my boss's office legs and arms crossed, pouty-mad expression on my face half whining, half complaining about having to work with that horrible female in the other room.

Today I started wondering what it would be like to work in a place where people don't have hissy fits, make unreasonable demands, and have to be cajoled into collaborating with a coworker. :lol:

I fantasize that that's what the real world is like....

[JNBunnie1]

So my crappy day at work culminated on Thursday with me sitting in my boss's office legs and arms crossed, pouty-mad expression on my face half whining, half complaining about having to work with that horrible female in the other room.

Today I started wondering what it would be like to work in a place where people don't have hissy fits, make unreasonable demands, and have to be cajoled into collaborating with a coworker. :lol:

I fantasize that that's what the real world is like....

Not mine. Pouty-mad is the 'expression du jour' most of the time where I work.