Living With Mother In-law

[MDRB]

Ok,

My (future) mother in-law has been staying with us for a week or so while she is visiting Australia (from england). I have been doing all the cooking but despite this I have definetly been getting that 'glutened' feeling. I have noticed her doing little things like cutting open a bread roll and then using the same knife to cut some cheese and think that it is these little things that are causing me to get sick again. I have discussed my celiac disease with her and she has been really understanding and I'm sure that these little things are accidental and only occur because she is not used to having to think about them.

The problem with all of this is that she is moving to Australia in an few months (which will be great) and we are going to be living with her (in her house) for a while (not sure how long) in order to save some money to buy a house of our own.

I guess what I am asking for is sugestions on ways to avoid cross contamination. Should I talk to her about it again? Do I need to seperate all my food? I don't want to seem like a big pain in the a@# or seem like I'm ungrateful for her letting us stay with her but I really can't afford to keep getting sick like this.

[gfpaperdoll]

Are you sure saving money to buy a house is worth losing your health? I would not do it. If you let her have wheat in your house - big mistake. when you are in HER house, you will have NO say as to how she runs HER kitchen.

You can try talking to her but unless she is a very nice understanding person, I would not hold out much hope. & you will have to have a take charge strong personality & not take anything less than 100% compliance with the ground rules that are set up, with the full backing of your husband. But if he is eating wheat... His mother will want to cook all his favorites... I just do not see a good outcome here...

Also about that saving money, are you saving now? Do you have a plan in writing for when you are living with the Mother in Law? If you do not have something concrete & stick to it - you could be living with her for the next 20 years... I repeat, do you think it is worth it???

[aikiducky]

Yes this kind of cross contamination will keep making you sick, so you need to talk about it. It might be awkward at first but it really is necessary for your health, there's just no way around that.

When I'm at my parents place, I have my own margarine tub, jam, etc. with stickers on them with my name. And we separate the counter tops, one side is the gluten side and one side is the "safe side, and even then I usually wipe down the counter before preparing something for myself.

Last time there were eight people in the house, so initially I was like the gluten police, reminding people to not cut bread on the safe side and so on. It's like you said, people who aren't used to watching out for this kind of things need some time to get used to it, and until they do, you need to keep reminding them.

There were some rumbles and sighs but you know, I think mostly that was when I reminded someone to be careful and they got annoyed with themselves for forgetting. So try not to take it too personally.

Pauliina

[ShayFL]

It is tough. I took my own food to my in laws for mother's day. I took some walnut pate and my own salad dressing to go with my salad. My MIL made roasted chicken fruit and salad because she knew I could eat those. She was very careful that nothing gluten got in them. She asked a lot of questions beforehand. Very nice. BUT she baked some fresh bread for everyone else to eat. So I said let's put the bread way off to he side so It doesnt get near my food. I plated up first to be safe. Then what do I see, she gets out triskets crackers and a knife and puts the walnut pate on the little crackers dipping the knife back into the pate the whole time. So I didnt eat anymore and let them have the rest. And FIL has a hunk of bread in his mouth hovering over the salad. I am thinking....crumbs!! So I did not get seconds. It is a hassle.

I wouldt live with her if I could at all avoid it. Just asking for trouble and it isnt their fault.

[Phyllis28]

One option is to setup a gluten free zone outside the kitchen when you move into her house. A microwave, refrigerator, kitchen cart, utentsils, plates, cookware ect... Everything you need except the stove, oven, sink and dishwasher. Of course you will need to discuss this with your MIL first.

Another option is to speak with your MIL about the possibility of temporarily maintaining a gluten free household while you live with her.

You are correct in that using a knife to cut bread and then cut cheese will cause the cheese to be cross contaminated. It is hard for people to remember to do these things at first.

In the mean time in your own home you need to set down rules that will keep you healthy. I do not have a gluten free household. I have always maintained separate condiments, cold meats butter etc... I never cut anything directly on the counter. If you had a gluten free household before she arrived insist that it be maintained.

If, in your opinion, after discussing your dietary needs that you will not be safe in her household don't move in.

Hope you can work all this out.