How Do You Get Over Doubts ? Can You Help Me- Any Suggestions, On What I Should Look At?

[crunchy-mama]

Now I have went back and forth on the diet. IN May of this year we went on vacation and I decided to indulge in whatever gluten and dairy(I have been off of dairy for my newest little one as well- who had the green stools and blood- this time around I didn't wait to take it out though). Well, that started the spiral down. The past few months I have felt absolutely horrible- have been laying on the couch, depressed, a total brain fog, tired, entirely lacking in motivation and anger issues. I also start to feel a total lack of hope and like everyone hates me and I hate everyone- I have went back gluten free a few times and within 1 day I feel like all of sudden the fog is just lifted. I have energy and motivation, it is just night and day. I went off gluten again this past Sunday (very strictly label reading- all food has been homecooked). Again, within a day I felt so much better.. However, I get a few days out and I start to think perhaps it is the candida issue and not a gluten issue. . Then I wonder about about my 2nd pregnancy- I wasn't gluten free, only light and I didn't have these issues (well- I take that back I had a constant recurrent yeast infection, some insomnia issues- which I have thought is diet connected)- Now, it seems that I cannot cope w/ just going lite as if I eat a little of anything it just sets off horrible cravings. Then I also think- when I eat gluten-free I for sure am keeping all the crap out my diet, so maybe it is something

So, I am trying to figure out the best route for testing. We have limited funds, so I want to get the most bang for my buck. Whatever we do will be out of pocket as our insurance has a high deductible., I am torn between the gene and the stool test and not sure which would be best. Right now I know I cannot go back to eating the gluten- and certainly not at the level to get any accurate testing and the blood testing seems to have lots of false negative. I was leaning towards the gene testing to see if it is even a possibility- it seems that would mark it off the list and I could look other places. I want some kind of confirmation of something though, as I keep reverting back= even though I feel terrible. I need something that says that I am not crazy and I am not making this up. The thing is, I wonder if it is necessary to be totally strict or not. I want to be able to just keep the diet, but these doubts just hang in my head.

[History]I always considered myself pretty healthy UNTIL after baby #1 was born(7/04). Then I didn't think of my own health so much, but started with concerns w/ my son. He was fussy all the time and had the green stools...... I tried to start him on solids, but that didn't go so well. He had blood in his stool at times and his behavior would go crazy, with some foods, it seemed dairy was a big one. However, I didn't follow my gut ( I kept blaming it on anything else- I bf and had an oversupply , so it was easy to put the blame on the green stools there - and he was fussy, but lots of babies are).

Finally, at 15 mo I took him to the ND who suggested Candida and we followed a pretty strict diet w/ a bunch of supplements.. She is the one that suggested that I work on healing myself. I hadn't thought of it too much, but after talking to her- I realized that perhaps my huge rage issues and depression might have an answer. I just thought I was a bad mother. I was soo tired as well, but well, I had a fussy baby.,

So, my son went back to exclusively nursing(his solids were minimal at that point anyway). I did a candida diet and felt better, but then ended up on the SCD diet (gluten and all starch free and low lactose- as a brief explanation). I felt so much better. Luke did better as well and then ended up back on solids. He seemed to digest his foods a lot better as well.

After the SCD I tried to slowly add back grains, but I had HUGE bloating issues- as in I would look several months pregnant after eating anything. So, I went back and forth and back and forth. During my 2nd pregnancy I ate very gluten lite and kept the dairy mostly to trace or fermented dairy ie keifir and yogurt. I felt really good. However, 2 days before #2 was born(4/07) our house burned down and we had to live w/ others for awhile- then in a rental house for 5 months (we got to move back home 6 mo after the fire). Well, my diet got shot to heck living w/ others in the rental- I just had too much stress. I had a horrible time losing the weight and finally went off all the grains, felt much better. So, I have been back off and on grains since October(08) or so- and during those times very gluten light ie just trace amounts here and there or cc.....

Now- to make this more complicated after reading about the whole gluten issue I think back to my childhood and that makes me strongly suspect Celiac. From near birth until 6 I was deathly ill, FTT etc. I was a teeny kid- 30 lbs at 5. The dr's thought my mom was starving me, even admitted me to the hospital so they could feed me. They then decided mom was not starving me and told mom to just keep me on the bottle. Evidently I couldn't really handle solid foods other than pudding, and haiwaiian delight baby food. I was still very ill until age 6 until my tonsils were removed- so says mom. I was still tiny until finally a growth spurt in late childhood. I then wonder about my dad as well who was always teeny, tiny until late teenage when he finally shot up. He has terrible issues w/ his teeth and I found out recently that he won't drink milk except on the weekend as it gives him diarrhea immediately. He has alcohol addiction issues as well, which run rampant in the family.

And for anyone interested my 4 y.o. is currently eating everything. I am still not certain this is good, but decided to let him eat it w/o hard evidence as I know it would be better for testing. I am still worried about his height and weight, quite concerned at times and wonder about some learning and behavior- I don't know what is just in the range of normal or what isn't. The baby is dairy free and was gluten and grain free until recently, but I find that sometimes she gets ahold of things from Luke.

[ShayFL]

If you can swing it, I would get the stool and genetic with Enterolab. And it sounds like SCD is your answer (which is naturally gluten-free). SCD is a very healthy diet, especially once you get through the introductory phase and can eat everything allowed on the diet. It is working great for me.

[crunchy-mama]

If you can swing it, I would get the stool and genetic with Enterolab. And it sounds like SCD is your answer (which is naturally gluten-free). SCD is a very healthy diet, especially once you get through the introductory phase and can eat everything allowed on the diet. It is working great for me.

I do agree that the SCD works great for healing. However, I would rather not be that restrictive if I don't have to be. SEriously the thought of going back on it brings up many bad thoughts. Now, right now I am feeling great just gluten free(mostly dairy free as well- I do butter and am going to try and add in some 24 hr yogurt- I need to see how Lily responds - from the transfer from my breastmilk). I guess that is the crux of this- how strict do I need to be? Without any kind of confirmation of anything, how do keep on track? I guess this is the same question asked many times over. My family has heard my different diet thoughts so many times I know they think I am crazy- think so myself many times.

[Guhlia]

This isn't the same Crunchy Momma from Amazon, is it?

[crunchy-mama]

This isn't the same Crunchy Momma from Amazon, is it?

I use this name a lot,but I don't believe I have used it at amazon- I believe it is turboblue over there(dh and I share the amazon account).

[Guhlia]

Ha ha ha. Ok. I was just curious because I just talked to someone who referred to herself as crunchymamma about Celiac. It was in a Nursery Water discussion. lol. I just wondered if this was the same woman.