Need To Lose A Lot Of Weight

[Twisha]

I admit, I was seriously underweight at 126 lbs (I'm 5'11) when I got diagnosed but since I had my little boy !13 months old) I've ballooned from 170 to 230 in just 2 years! I used to be athletic (10 years martial arts training), but now I'm almost sedentary. My cooking skills are ok, but I don't have a lot of different dishes in my repetoir. I also LOVE cheese and snack on it WAY too often. I don't even have any idea how to begin.

My husband is sick with emphasyma, overweight, and depressed. He hardly ever leaves the house and spends hours playing computer games. My 9 year old stepson is thin so far but never plays outsideand is also fixated on his video games (not the violent ones, mostly pokemon). I bought him a trampoline for Christmas but he hardly ever plays on it. They are both a very picky eaters (Stepson can't stand mushrooms or most sauces, loves Junk food (Pizza bites, corn dogs, chips, etc...), and dislikes meat! My husband gets heartburn from tomatoes and dislikes onions!! Neither of them eat enough (that is to say any) veggies. Add in my celiac disease and my recipies are pretty limited. I have NO idea what to cook. To top it off my 1 year old is starting to eat real food now and I want him to eat healthfully. I'm pretty much at my wit's end.

I don't mean to sound whiney. I'm not trying to make anyone feel sorry for me. I just want to DO something to fix this situation! Do any of you have any advice for me? Has anyone been in this kind of situation? I NEED help. I want my family to be healthy!

Thanks

[celiac-mommy]

I was in your situation 7 years ago. I was 100# overweight after the birth of my dd. I changed everything about the way my family ate from then on. I can't control what my dh eats outside of the house (he's currently ~60# overweight, on BP meds, and has no desire to do anything about it) BUT I can control what he/they eat in my house. Very little junk food, lots of fruits and veggies, 1 hour or less of media per day (more lax on the weekends), as much outside time as possible, etc... We are a transformed family. I've lost those 100# and maintained for 5 years so far. We are always looking for new and fun activities to do, have recently taken up Krav Maga and snowboarding and am ADDICTED to both!! You and your dh need to decide together what changes to make within your family so that you're on the same page and maybe have a family meeting to talk with the kids about what will be taking place. That way they won't be pitting one against the other.

Rules for our meals are:

Breakfast:protein, carb, fruit

snack:fruit, something else (yogurt, cheese, crackers, etc)

Lunch:protein, carb, veggie (occasional pudding snack pack, cookie, treat of some sort)

snack: same as above or raw veggies with dip (dressing, hummus, etc..)

Dinner:protein, carb, salad, hot veggie

Treats: only after dinner has sufficiently been finished

Good luck to you, it's a marathon, not a sprint!

[sbj]

Hi Twisha:

There's darkness at the end of the tunnel so don't despair. Anyone can overcome a weight problem but it will take had work and a lifestyle change - so be prepared.

My first suggestion is to work on yourself. If you won't change then how can you expect your husband or children to change? If they see changes in you then they will be more likely to change themselves. AFTER they see that you've made successful changes in your own life they might change themselves.

Lets' just start with the first few things you mention. You are almost sedentary ... so let's start walking or some other simple exercise! Nothing too difficult to begin with: 5 days a week for 20 minutes at a time. Even if you can't do that much do something, anything is better than nothing. If you want to lose weight it is pretty simple - you have to use more calories than you consume. You can either cut back on your food or increase your exercise. You probably need to do both. Start with some simple exercise.

You don't have a lot of dishes in your repertoire? Well, start trying some new dishes! There's tons of ideas on the internet so get cooking! How about watching some cooking shows on TV and trying those dishes? How about a class or two at the local community college? Gluten is only one very small portion of an overall diet - there are plenty of wonderful things to make that don't contain gluten. Start cooking - you have the skills, the recipes are all out there.

You love cheese? Start by using 2% cheese, then cut back on the portion. If you must eat fatty cheese then try swiss or mozarella. If you must eat cheese then reduce your othe proteins. Use finely grated cheese - it goes further.

Your picky eaters? There are actually plenty of options. I don't like mushrooms and don't eat many tomatoes - that still leaves plenty. Your stepson doesn't like sauces? Good for him - most of those usually add tons of fat and calories. There are plenty of low fat chips and snack foods available for stepson. He doesn't like meat? Good for him again as meat is often full of fat and calories. Beans are a great source of low fat protein. It really won't be too difficult to both accommodate your picky eaters and cook healthy meals - I think you really just need to do a bit more recipe hunting. I suggest going to yahoo - typing in some ingredients they like, add the word recipe, and click search. You'll be amazed at the variety of things that pop up. Visit your library and check out some cookbooks.

Could I suggest something like overeater's anonymous for yourself? How about networking with friends who might have similar problems?

Good luck!

[Twisha]

You and your dh need to decide together what changes to make within your family so that you're on the same page and maybe have a family meeting to talk with the kids about what will be taking place. That way they won't be pitting one against the other.

How did you convince your DH to help? My DSS is VERY stubborn and is likely to make life miserable for us for a while after a change. Nowadays my DH just seems to go with whatever is easiest... I don't know what happened to him! He's better than that!

[julirama723]

Maybe one thing that would work is to incorporate good foods IN to your current diet, rather than focusing on taking all the bad stuff OUT at one time.

Add peppers to omelets, cut up fresh veggies and serve with dip as a snack, keep a fruit bowl filled with a wide variety of fruits. Experiment with veggies that have lots of sweet flavor, like sweet potatoes and winter squash. Make homemade salsa that is PACKED with fresh veggies, along with homemade guacamole. Try mashed cauliflower instead of mashed potatoes.

I'm a fan of un-processed, whole foods. Generally I watch carbs (diabetes runs in my family, and I've had great success low-carbing, lost 100 pounds, gained a small amount back prior to figuring out gluten is a problem) and eat good fats.

I really like Rachelle's meal planning idea. She incorporates fresh produce with every meal or snack!

Even if your family doesn't WANT to change, you owe it to yourself to change. If you cook the meals, they don't have much of a choice! Plus, if they see you getting healthy, losing weight, feeling good, gaining confidence, having more energy, they're more likely to jump on the bandwagon. Like I said, maybe you don't want to go cold turkey with the junk food all at once, but instead maybe it's best to start incorporating some good foods and gradually take out the bad.

[celiac-mommy]

How did you convince your DH to help? My DSS is VERY stubborn and is likely to make life miserable for us for a while after a change. Nowadays my DH just seems to go with whatever is easiest... I don't know what happened to him! He's better than that!

There really wasn't much of an option for him. I do all the grocery shopping and all of the cooking. I do ask for input when planning the menu so I know what to buy and modifications needed to make it gluten-free and healthy. Then I get input after the meal regarding changes to make, never make again, make tomorrow, etc...

As far as getting the kids on track, we set up some house rules. We are not a big TV family anyway, I've never wanted it that way, so they are usually allowed to watch 1/2 hour before breakfast and 1/2 hour while I make dinner. The first thing taken away from them is their media time--they really try not to get in trouble because they don't want to lose what little time they have. The 1 hour rule applies to all media-tv, video games, computer, etc... They can choose to use that hour however and usually whenever they want. There is also a no negotiation on reading time every day. 20 minutes has to be spent reading--whatever they want to read is fine (and we obviously read to the 3yo or 7yo dd reads to him). If the kids throw a fit or are difficult when it comes to house rules, they get privileges taken away. This might take them a while to get used to, but consistancy is key. This is where your husband MUST be involved in. I know from girlfriends with step children that it has to be the biological parent to take most of the charge or there will be trouble. I don't know your family dynamic as far as custody, co-parenting, regular disciplinarian etc... so you have to do what works for your family.

Maybe you can take your dh out to dinner so you can discuss everything together without interuptions before tackling the kids...

[missy'smom]

We've eaten our meals on salad plates rather than dinner plates for ages. I use the dinner plates as serving plates for groups. Sets vary in size but ours are way too big and portions look so small on them. To control snacking for kiddo I serve a portioned amount, a balance variety, nicely arranged on a plate at a scheduled time after school and that's it until dinner. I have my scheduled snack/tea time at the same time and in the same manner.

EDIT: I find menu planning and making lists of meals that work very helpful in coping. That way I'm not constantly re-inventing the wheel. It helps control spending and dietary issues as well. I've done it various ways with lists/menues on the fridge or laptop.

[weeza]

You might want to take what I say with a grain of salt because I am new at this but I and my husband are both overweight. My 20 yr old son has autism and eats very limited foods and my 16 yr old DD is very athletic but shows signs of celiac or at least gluten-intolerance (need to have her tested) After being sick a long time and eating pretty unhealthy, I was diagnosed and have been gluten free for about a month. A month ago I told my husband, (who is very resistant to change and in evenings a couch potato) DH, you know how sick I've been and really need to get a grip on my diet to figure out how to live gluten free so I am only making gluten-free meals without all the premade gluten-free snacks. What you eat away or what you make yourself is your business.

Well 4 weeks later I am feeling better and have lost 10 of the 40lbs I need to lose. My dh was feeling so much better just eating a healthy dinner that he says he is making better choices at lunch, he has lost 13lbs and has even has been taking a walk every evening instead of just vegging in front of tv.

I guess what I am saying is that I didn't tell him he had to change but I said I had to change and I needed his help. He really thought he would hate not having my traditional cooking but he is feeling so much more energy that he is changing on his own. BTW my DD is eating healthy and is learning to read her body after having gluten. My DS is slower to coming around because of his eating issues but even he with his special needs is learning if he doesnt eat what I make, he has to make something himself.

Added bonus is my kids are learning how to prevent cross-contamination so my Kitchen stays spotless. Like I said. I am new at this, but I hope my family will stay on board because it is making this lifestyle change easier on me. Good luck to you

[knowurgluten]

I used to be size 16 and now I am size 6. The things that really helped me to lose weight is taking the source naturals digestive enzymes. They can be expensive, but the place I get them from is viteaminz.com I saw over 150 reviews for these and all positive, so I got them. They claim to help metabolize carbs, proteins, fiber and sugar and I never thought I'd ever get over my bloating. But these things help SOOO Much. You actually feel lighter after a meal. BUT you HAVE to take two capsules just prior to eating. I mean like. I only wait a few minutes after I take 2 to eat. They are truly a life saver!

If you do that, drink plenty of water, walk everyday and just cut down on your portion sizes, you should be fine.

I'll be here for you too because I hated to be overweight!