Sleeping Through The Night

[BeHappy]

My three year old is extremely attached to me to the point where she wakes up every single night at around midnight and finds me wherever I am and goes to sleep near me. I'm starting to think she's just not comfortable to sleep through the night... As of now she is still on gluten until her endoscopy.

What can I do to help her calm herself down? She has a security blanket and all that, but it doesn't seem to be doing the trick. Am I supposed to let her sleep near me, or is that feeding into her need? Should I be firm and not let her come downstairs? If she comes to me in the middle of the night (Which is EVERY night.) am I supposed to take her back to her room with her sisters? (This causes her to tantrum TERRIBLY) This has been going on for about a yr and a half (She's been in a bed for quite a while) Also, do you think if I lotion her down with lavender will it help?

[Dixiebell]

That's a hard one to answer. Is she in pain when she wakes up? Is something possibly scaring her?

These are just ideas so bear with me- Maybe you could put her in bed a little later. My children have always looked at books for a little while until they got sleepy. Do you have a night light in the room? Is she watching tv up until bed time? If so you might want to change that. I think a bath is good before bed and I have seen lavender body wash for children. Maybe changing her routine a little could help. Personally, If trying some new things does't work, I would just deal with it until the endo is done and then start the gluten free diet as soon as it it done. You do not need to wait on the endo result to start gluten-free.

[tarnalberry]

I'm not the best one to ask - we cosleep now at six months and have no intention of changing that anytime soon or until she is very ready for it. But, I would say that you are not the only one with this going on, and that it may just be her personality and temperment, rather than a food thing. (One of the reasons we cosleep is because, anthropologically and evolutionarily, what six month old or three year old would have been best served sleeping alone for hours in the dark of the night thousands of years ago? I'm not saying that you shouldn't have her sleep in her own room, but realize that she may not be prepared to be alone that long; every baby is different in terms of adapability.)

My friend noted that, with her child, moving bedtime EARLIER made sleeping much better. (We often don't consider how long babies need to sleep, or how often. I know that mine gets to be a bear to get to sleep if she's stayed awake longer than she's good for - whether that's three hours or an hour and a half.)

I hope that she can be more comfortable after the testing is done, and that something changes for the better for you all, though.

[T.H.]

We coslept, too, so the midget just slept in our room.

HOWEVER...my daughter is 12 now. She has always been very, well, nervy about sleeping, I guess I'd call it. Both when she was small and with us, and when she was older and slept on her own, she woke frequently, wanting to be reassured that everything was all right, mama was still around, things were safe. Often wanted to come in and sleep in my room, if I'd let her. Calming down didn't help. Relaxing activity before bed, massages, moving bedtimes - nothin'. Considering that I was this way as a kid too, I just figured it was genetic, ya know?

When she went off gluten, I didn't really notice that this nervousness slowly disappeared, until it REappeared after she got glutened.

So while I think personality will obviously play a roll in all of this, I would say that at least in our case, gluten played a roll in how our daughter slept and how worried she was during the night.

As to what to do? I tend to simply try to figure out where it's a want or a need. Like, going back to bed - not a big deal, or she loses it? Does the little one look like it's REALLY important to be comforted during the night? My own personal feeling during that sort of thing is, okay, it's inconvenient, but when I'm really afraid/upset, I want the people I love to comfort me, even if it's not the best time for them. So, I try to return the favor, ya know?