When Will I Be Able To Cope With This?

[CJoy]

It has been five months now that I have been gluten free. I was diagnosed two weeks before leaving home to go back for my second year of college. I feel good on some days but on other days I find myself depressed/angry about my diagnosis (the whole college environment does not help at all!). I keep telling myself to get a hold of my feelings and move on but I'm afraid I can't- at least not yet. How long did it take for everyone else to come to grips with their diagnosis? Is there anything I'm missing or is it normal to still be feeling this way five months after being diagnosed?

[Takala]

Yeah, college students are not exactly noted for their empathy at times.

Most people get happier as adults anyway.

Look at the bright side, you are, by getting officially diagnosed now, instead of going thru years or decades of increasingly whacked out symptoms that doctors will try to suggest is IAIYH, IBS, FIBRO, FIBRO BRAIN FOG, STRESS, ANXIETY, PREMATURE PERIMENOPAUSE, OSTEOPOROSIS, LIVERGALLSTONES, MS, IDIOPATHIC (insert disease), and try to mask with mood enhancers, getting a chance at a healthy life.

And this will really show up by the time you are 40 or 50 and stuck on this healthier diet. Other people will not get diagnosed or have other things go wrong with their seemingly perfect younger lives, and you see them years later, and you think, "wow. what ever happened to them. they look horrible." And then you find out in addition to aging less well, they had many other things go wrong. Or their kids were not at all like what was portrayed in the Holiday Letter.

[ravenwoodglass]

It can take a while to come to terms with having celiac and it is tough when your a college student. One thing for me that may or may not pertain to you is that I get bouts of depression when I get glutened. Could you have gluten sneaking in? A food and mood diary might be helpful in pinpointing if there is something that links the episodes. Sometimes it is helpful to also see a counselor to help get through the grieving process.

[tictax707]

Cjoy,

It's ok that you are feeling like this now. Don't beat yourself up about not being ok with it at the moment. In the grand scheme of things 5 months is not really all that long. You've got plenty of time to go through whatever you need to go through. It's really kind of like going through stages of grief. I think it's more important to be honest with your feelings at the moment which will actually enable you to really be able to accept & "move on" as you say.

I actually thing that "coming to grips" may not really a finalized thing, but an emotion or reaction that is constantly evolving. But I don't mean that in a way to say "you'll never get over this" I mean more to say that the acceptance will come along sometimes in spurts, and sometimes you might still feel bad, mad, frustrated. But ultimately I think that's ok, and its not realistic to be perfectly happy with anything 100% of the time, you know?

In addition, as public awareness keeps evolving & technology and food options keep evolving, the way you feel about things may keep evolving. When I was first diagnosed the store bought bread options that were available to me were pretty horrific. As were the cake mixes. (oh, how I will never forget my first post-diagnosis birthday cake. Thank god we can laugh about it now). But now with so many options in stores and increased awareness in restaurants has made me feel less isolated than when I first started. There will still be adjustments for you in that regard, but as time passes, things will likely seem much less dismal. Hang in there, and definitely use this arena for support. I wish you the best!!!

[SaraKat]

I was diagnosed in August 2010 and I am 35. I get down about the diagnosis when I am not feeling well (like now). I have had 3 bouts of not feeling well since the diagnosis. It is hard, but I try not to get too down. I try to exercise a lot, usually I can do that even when I am not feeling well. My main symptom is pain in my left side and when it is there that is all I can think about.

When I feel good, I don't even think about celiac. I guess just try to stay gluten-free as much as possible and hopefully you will start to feel better.

At least you got diagnosed so you know what is wrong. It took me about a year to get a diagnosis which I thought was long, but then I read some other people's stories and I feel lucky.

Good Luck!

[sb2178]

I agree that you can't ever entirely just "get over it" because you always have to think about it in order to function in daily life. It's like being blind, or deaf, or something where it affects your life. You can, however, negotiate peace most of the time. it helps once your friends are used to it, and automatically stock a hard cider in the fridge or bring chocolate instead of cookies. I stabilized at about 6 to 7 months, in sort of knowing what I could eat and being happy enough about it.

Coincidentally, that was the point at which I also started to feel considerably more stable in terms of weight and seemed to stop randomly reacting to very small trace amounts from things like not washing my hands. I had also cut out dairy, which was hard, but helped a bit with total symptom resolution.

Gotta tell you, still have days where co-workers at lunch start talking about pizza tasting and boy, i want to whine. I don't, but oh, I'd like to. Fortunately, I know of one place that has pizza I really like for eating out and a bakery where I can buy frozen pizzas that I like. This is an excellent place to come whine when you need to, though.

[Mama Melissa]

Hey im about 4 1/2 months gluten free and while i gradually started to feel better the depression was one of the major symptoms before i got diagnosed as well.I totally understand how knowing what you have can make you feel so different like no one understands,it wasn't until i realised i needed help ,a boost so to call it. My gi doc had given me a prescription for Elavil 10 ml when i first got diagnosed i had stomach problems as well.I decided i need to give it a go mainly because it also helps with depression as well and WOW what a difference i feel 100% now it took a good 2 weeks to kick in but life is soo worth living and the diet is now a breeze no biggie atall:)I was help bent on not taking any pills and i dont plan on doing it forever just a couple months until the diet sinks in a little more!But boy am i happy i did.I wish you luck and keep your chin up you will only get BETTER from here on out xoxo ~Melissa~

[MelindaLee]

I went gluten-free in August 2010. I was pretty positive about the whole idea since I tend to be a "when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade" kind of person. But, even with this, and SUPERB support from my friends and family, I still get frustrated and depressed about being gluten-free at times. I remember college well...I can imagine it hits you in the face a bit more since you my not have as much control over your food if you live in community housing. Keep your chin up..this too shall pass.

[RedShark92]

Well... I'm just over a week diagnosed and alternating between feeling OK about this and on top of it and feeling totally overwhelmed with the whole thing. Really happy to hear I may have 7 more months of roller coaster!

[SarahAnn7272]

It has been five months now that I have been gluten free. I was diagnosed two weeks before leaving home to go back for my second year of college. I feel good on some days but on other days I find myself depressed/angry about my diagnosis (the whole college environment does not help at all!). I keep telling myself to get a hold of my feelings and move on but I'm afraid I can't- at least not yet. How long did it take for everyone else to come to grips with their diagnosis? Is there anything I'm missing or is it normal to still be feeling this way five months after being diagnosed?

I am completely new to this and I am 22, probably around the same age. It is already becoming challenging and I completely understand where you are coming from. Its so frustrating when my friends want to go out to dinner, or going to the bars. They dont seem to understand that this is serious and I cant just "have a beer" or "just skip the diet for a meal". I am hoping I will adjust soon and I am glad to see I am not alone in this. It's becoming a fad in my town to cut out gluten but most people are doing it just because of the trend, not because it makes them sick like me. This message board is really the only communication I have, and I was hoping to hear from others my age.

[CathyG]

I was only diagnosed a couple of weeks ago and I have to say that I feel much better now that I know what's wrong with me.

I have 2 small children, one is 1yr and the other is 3yrs and I would do anything to make sure that I'm around to be their Mum. Giving up gluten is alot easier for me than coping with an illness when I have little ones to look after.

I see where you're coming from and can understand that being in college would definitely be a challenge. Just keep telling yourself that at least you found out now and that you'll be healthy and able to avoid scary life threatening diseases later in life if you look after yourself. As they say "knowledge is power" and it's better to know what's going on especially with a disease like this that can be managed.

You'll probably find that once you finish college you'll feel alot better about your diet and lifestyle - I'm in a different stage of life to you and I find that it's not that difficult to maintain this lifestyle, it just takes a few changes which aren't that hard for me. You'll probably find the same thing

[sahm-i-am]

I am sorry you are having a hard time lately. I've been diagnosed for 9 months now and just this past weekend I had a mini-pity party 'melt-down' hissy fit about being Celiac. I was in full blown toddler tantrum mode. I have the best supportive family and my friends are great about it. I haven't been glutened and actually don't even react to gluten (except the damage inside). I was just mad and thought it unfair. A few hours later I was over it. Sure, I cried. My husband was totally sympathetic and knows how bad this disease sucks. But it just feels good to get it out. It also helps to have someone else validate your feelings.

You will have better days. You just have to find your new normal.