Gluten-Free Dating?

[Gluten-Freed]

I'm a male in my late 20s who is trying to figure out the best way to deal with celiac disease when going on dates with women. Specifically, I was wondering what experiences people have had going on dates with people who don't have celiac disease. For example, is it best to avoid food-related first dates?

[sa1937]

There have been a number of topics posted about dating...you might want to use the Google search button in the top right corner of your screen and type in dating...you'll come up with a lot of experiences others have gone through. Personally I think it would be easier to avoid food-related first dates.

[LauraB0927]

I didnt have to go through this since I was diagnosed after being engaged (it was a shocker!). But as a female your age, I have a couple suggestions. Sure, it would be easier to avoid food related dates at the beginning, just to see if you're compatible and want to take the relationship further. You also may be able to weed out who would be understanding of our situation.

But eventually food will come up, especially if you're spending more than a couple hours with her - food will be a necessity and it may seem odd if you're always mysteriously avoiding getting something to eat. My suggestion is bring it up earlier rather than later - the more casually you discuss it the less it will seem like a major issue. One thing you can do is get the app on your phone "Find me Gluten Free" or "Gluten Free Registry", and before you go on a date, look up gluten free restaurants in the area so if she asks to get food, you'll automatically know where you can go to eat. Casually ask for the gluten free menu and then begin another topic of conversation. If she asks about the gluten free menu, tell her you have food allergies (its easier to understand and tons of people have food allergies) and then if the relationship progresses then you can get into more detail about the Celiac. Just watch what she eats/drinks, cause if she starts chugging down a beer, then the kissing/cross contamination becomes a factor.

Again, from a girl's point of view, the more casual the conversation is about it the less it seems like a daunting issue. I would think nothing of a peanut or shellfish allergy, and gluten would also be the same. If she asks questions about it, definitely answer them, but keep the casual tone. There ARE girls out there who would understand, just like my fiance hopped on board as soon as he found out my diagnosis.

I hope this helps! Good luck!!

[JNBunnie1]

Laser tag. Weeds out the fussy girls, too!

[pricklypear1971]

It might be beneficial to work in something about not being able to suck face with someone who has been eating gluten before the situation arises.

Hate for a girl to get needlessly offended if you run away from her....or if you offer up another part for kissing...

[Finally-45]

You may find that hanging around people (dating or not) who are open to health food/vegetarian restaurants are easier to eat with. Most places that cater to people who really think about what they eat are also great places for gluten-free eating.

[New Community Member]

If you're near a Chipotle restaurant, everything there is gluten free, except the flour tortillas of course. My experiences there have been positive when I get the burrito bowls. I just kindly ask them to change gloves, and they should get you new lettuce and cheese. Of course, it's hard to avoid food on dates, but at least your food would look and be similar to your dates. As a celiac, it's my favorite restaurant. Everytime I go to a restaurant, I do some research before...is it safe, what are my options? But avoiding food altogether for first dates, could be fun, too!! There's more ways to get to know people besides sitting around a table! And a wise person once told me that if they really love you they won't care [that you have celiac, you can only eat certain foods]. There's more to us than just that. Good luck on your road to recovery and a full life!

[New Community Member]

Again, from a girl's point of view, the more casual the conversation is about it the less it seems like a daunting issue.

Great response. And this goes with addressing the gluten issue with anyone who asks questions. Answering the question then casually changing the topic seems like the best way. Sometimes, it's easier said than done. (I think it does take practice though.) If we make it a big deal, they will make it a big deal, and vice versa.

[IrishHeart]

Just my opinion, but if I were to start dating right now, (good lawdie, let's hope not!! )

I'd make dinner first at my house (where I know it's safe) and then after dessert, I'd tell the girl flat out.."I have celiac disease and this is what I have to do to stay safe....."

The girl will either run... or stay and learn.

Why beat around the bush? It's our reality. It is what it is...it's not a "catchy "

disease, for goodness sake--and certainly nothing to be ashamed of! How YOU view it--is how anyone else will view it.

My friend Skylark once said "having celiac and dating is like having a built-in Jerk-o-meter"

She's right. My hubs did not abandon me when I was deathly ill for 3 years and then DXed....and any girl worthy of you? will also be supportive, hon.

Find a "keeper".

Best wishes!

[Finally-45]

I agree that Chipotle is a great compromise to eat with a mixed group or with someone for the first time. Be sure to visit the restaurant forum.