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Wanting To Support My Beloved.
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8 posts in this topic

I just joined maybe 2 or 3 minutes ago. I joined because my beloved was diagnosed with Celiac TODAY. When I found out, I was really worried that her life may be in danger and all sorts of other things along those lines. I immediately began trying to find out as much as possible in terms of diet, symptoms, risks, lifestyle choices, and nearly every other aspect of her life that may be effected by this disease.

I'm sure my use of "beloved", in reference to the young woman I am courting, may have confused some people. We've decided to use this word to relate to each other by, because it is so different from the norm of today's society, and that's how we want our relationship to be; our "courtship" is a serious relationship, with the intention of marriage in a little under 2 years. We want the world to not see us for our age or the fact that we're together, but rather that we're two people growing to love each other, and wanting to do it right. That being said, I want to begin learning how to help her with this in any way I can, so that by the time we're married, it'll be second nature and it'll just be our way of life. It will also probably improve my own eating habits/diet, so it's probably in my best interest to begin learning about it right now anyways.

If anyone has information they think would be good for me to have as well, please share! I would be very happy to receive any advice from people who have already been traveling down the path which I've just begun walking towards.

Thank you all and God Bless,

-Andr

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What a "beloved" you are for making the time and effort to learn how you can support her through this difficult transition in her life. And yes, it is difficult, because you have to change the whole way you think about food. Whereas before you could just grab anything that looked appetizing, now the first question has to be, "Is it gluten free?" And frustratingly, there is no way most often when you are outside the home of answering that question. It is relatively easy to turn the home you are going to make together into a gluten free zone, but while your beloved iis still living with her parents(if she is) it is going to be difficult to get them to understand how to keep her safe.

The first thing you should do is read Newbie 101 on this board, as if it were you who had the condition (I always hesitate to call it a disease because if you don't eat gluten you are normally well) because this way you will understand her reactions and what she is going through. It will help if you don't try to take her to restaurants that don't have gluten free menus (Mom and Pop Diners are out for you), and it will also help if you don't go to restaurants at all until you have both mastered the basics of the gluten free diet. To do this, it always helps if you start off eating whole foods only (with the exception perhaps of some Udi's bread, some Tinkyada pasta, perhaps some frozen gluten free waffles if you are so inclined). Corn tortillas are excellent substitutes for bread and there are brown rice wraps (try Trader Joe's) that are useful for making burrito or pita type foods. But shop the outside of the market, meats, vegetables, fruits of all kinds, maybe try some you haven't even tried before (you can always google, e.g., swiss chard recipe gluten free). Then add in rice, beans, nuts, seeds. Try to avoid the substitute gluten free foods as much as possible at first - it is just too much label reading, as is all the processed food in boxes and cans. Save that for later.

Once you have got that far, come back and ask whatever questions you need, and encourage your beloved to come on here and post too. There is always someone with an answer to a question. :)

Welcome to the board, Andres, and good luck to you both in your future life together.

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First, I would like to thank you for your caring for your beloved. Also, for wanting to do your courtship right. While first on the diet she will be healing and during that time the body could be demanding for a time. It is also an emotionaly hard time. She needs to understand your commitment is 100%. It is difficult, but she is in a good spot having found out fairly young(?) and having you to back her up. Please help shield her from the gluten that can hurt her. That can mean constantly having the mind engaged to possible dangers. Please do read up on everything needed for treatment.

Next, I want to wish you strength and health from the Lord for both of you. I would also like you to have other friends that support and understand celiac.

If you have any more questions feel free to post again.

Diana

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Welcome Andres!

You already have what you need most in order to help. Your desire to learn the ins and outs of her diagnosis is the most important part of tackling this issue.

As Mushroom mentioned start with the Newbie 101 info. Read as much as you can and ask any questions - it will speed the learning curve. If she doesn't already know of this board, make sure your beloved is aware of it so she can find help processing the transition to living gluten-free!

I'll leave you with what melted my heart when I was newly diagnosed. I very much disliked causing a fuss when ordering at restaurants. I was a bit embarrassed, but it was more a matter of growing up with a parent that complained every time we dined out so I really disliked being in a position that seemed like I was acting the same. Anyway...my husband learned the proper way to order safely for me...when I would not speak up, he did it for me. He made it very clear that my health was important to him and that the restaurant needed to use great care with my food. He also helped family and friends understand the need for safe food. Should your "beloved" not want to make a fuss, do it for her.

Best wishes to you both, along with hopes for speedy healing for her :)

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Thank you all for your kind messages :). I was very encouraged by your support of my motion to support my love in this. I understand that it will be difficult at first for her and I to both adjust. She is still living with her parents at this point, and I'm sure that they're already learning about the different ways to protect her, as I am. Her mom is a stay-at-home mom who makes herbal remedies and such (the legit kind, not drugs haha), so I'm sure she's already on top of this. We are both still pretty young; herself seventeen and I eighteen, both this year. I'm planning to go gluten-free as well... I can't remember if I put that up in the original post--*checks*--nope guess not lol. This is going to be an even bigger change for me than it is her I believe. She already almost only ate healthy food, whereas I myself am quite a junk food fanatic ^.^; . But I'm praying for strength and diligence. I know it will pay off in the end. I'm thinking this will almost definitely improve my health also so I'm looking forward to that as well :).

Thanks again to all of you who replied to my original post. I look forward to hearing from you and other users in the near future.

-Andrés Rosales

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You've found a great place for advice! I do not post often but I spend a good bit of time reading through the posts. There is so much information.

I am glad to hear of your support for your Beloved. My boyfriend has been beyond supportive when we found out about my diagnosis 5 months ago. He suggested when we moved to our new house about 2 months post diagnosis that it should be gluten free. He also went through everything in our house and threw it away if it contained gluten. He is gluten free at home and normally gluten free outside of the house as well. Most days I think he copes with it better than I do.

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I am Lawana, Mom to Mary-Hannah (Andres' beloved). It has taken me a while to get over here and check out the forum. You can all imagine what a sweet surprise it was to read the posts that Andres wrote. I have been immersed in helping my daughter get rest and rein in her life to allow the rest her doctor recommended and revamping my kitchen (with help from Andres' mom) as well as preparing meals with excellent nutrition that taste good enough to tempt her still queasy tummy. Now I am here as well hoping to learn as much as I can from you folks.

Hi Andres. I finally got over here. I am so thankful that you are learning about Celiac. I am even more touched reading your posts. I look forward to learning more together. I am also looking forward to sharing our first gluten free Thanksgiving with you! BTW to Andres and the forum, I think I am seeing some improvements in the way Andres' beloved looks and feels already. It has just been a little over a month with only one accidental glutening. I think M-H is losing the dark circles. She is no longer cold all the time and though she is still sleeping 12 hours per day, she seems to wake up rested!!! I am thanking God for this diagnosis. I feel badly that we didn't figure it out years ago but I am thankful that she seems to be responding so well.

I would love any hints for moms changing over the entire family to gluten free. I also look forward to meeting you all.

BTW Dre' what are your favorite Thanksgiving foods?

Lawana

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haha a bit late for the favorite foods, but I really loved being with you guys on thanksgiving : ) I had a wonderful time with Mary-Hannah and the rest of you guys ^_^ can't wait to see you all again!

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