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Talking About Gluten Intolerance With Your Significant Other

I-want-nachos

By I-want-nachos
in Coping with Celiac Disease

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I-want-nachos Apprentice
I-want-nachos
Posted

Sorry I am posting like crazy. 

 

I first got diagnosed in August, but I was pretty sick before that for obvious reasons. The first time I went to the doctor their advice was to stick to a bland diet of plain toast lol. No improvement. My boyfriend knows the gist of my less gross symptoms (I get really intense migraines, become really sensitive to light, feel dizzy and hot, feel generally flu like, have really intense stomach cramps) but pretty much next to nothing about my other symptoms (aka my butt and the toilet become bffs <3). 

 

I don't really know if I believe it necessary to get down into that level of detail, but sometimes when I am feeling really bad I feel like it help him understand why I don't want to leave the house. I feel like I just seem like a baby when I am all, "i don't want to leave the house my stomach hurts" because frequently the stomach pain isn't actually that bad, the worst part is the D, but aside from that I'll feel pretty normal and capable of doing regular activities. 

 

Those of you with an SO, how have you helped them to better understand what is going on with your body? I find a lot of times for me leaving the house when I am having even a little bit of a reaction is scary because I am not sure what direction it is turning and I don't want to be stranded somewhere feeling horrible. I feel like staying in when I am looking and acting seemingly normal is totally wimpy though. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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kareng Grand Master
kareng
Posted

I think guys are less silly about this bathroom stuff than we girls. Think about it. They are more likely to laugh at potty humor, say " I have to take a crap", or pee or poop with the door open. I don't think you need to describe it...... But saying your stomach is upset and you feel the need to be near a bathroom tonight is enough explanation. Might turn him off.... But 20 something males might still be hoping for a little something at the end of the evening. :)

I-want-nachos Apprentice
I-want-nachos
Posted
  • Author

I think guys are less silly about this bathroom stuff than we girls. Think about it. They are more likely to laugh at potty humor, say " I have to take a crap", or pee or poop with the door open. I don't think you need to describe it...... But saying your stomach is upset and you feel the need to be near a bathroom tonight is enough explanation. Might turn him off.... But 20 something males might still be hoping for a little something at the end of the evening. :)

 

lol, Yeah, he's 23, I am about to turn 23 in a few months. If its really bad its pretty apparent, but that's probably only been once in front of him. My stomach was killin me and I thought I was gonna pass out and die. The boy got out of bed and walked to the 24 hour store at 5am to buy me jello that he made on the stove at 5am. Then he came back in bed and rubbed my belly and we looked at cute photos of cats. 

 

Sometimes though I'll just be having a random (but small) flare up and be feeling pretty well, but the idea of having sex is pretty out of the question in that state lol. 

 

He's a really good dude though I am sure I am just over thinking. Any time I have been sick he's ran to the store for me and been nothing but sweet. 

w8in4dave Community Regular
w8in4dave
Posted

My husband knew what was going on with my body. Heck I spent more time in the bathroom than he did! And believe me I wasn't putting make up on! Haha He did altho say at one point "You can eat a lil bit of Gluten" So he had to learn I could not for any reason eat any Gluten. I think the most important part is really teaching your significant other how important it is to stick to a gluten-free diet and the consequences if you don't. Like I cannot eat that! I will spend the rest of the day in the bathroom!! You don't have to be gross about it. Just make sure how ever you say it , he gets the jest of the whole idea. Og course I am alot older than you so I am not shy about telling my hubbs whats going on! :) 

NoGlutenCooties Contributor
NoGlutenCooties
Posted

I told my SO that I have to stay away from all gluten because even a little bit of it could land me in the bathroom for days - not being really sure which end to hold over the toilet first.  I didn't need to go into details... he got the picture.  And I'm an asymptomatic Celiac, meaning that I haven't had any symptoms yet - but have been warned that once I get it all out of my system, I may react to an accidental glutening, possibly quite severly.  My uncle also has Celiac and he's had a couple horror stories too.

 

I also just happened to mention to him that I've read a few stories where people have had such a bad reaction that they haven't been able to make it home and actually have had an "accident" in the car.  If he had any doubts before, I'm sure that sealed it.  (He has a new BMW, which I'm sure he wouldn't want.... soiled... LOL.)

bburmeister0407 Rookie
bburmeister0407
Posted

I had to do this with my roommates just last week. When I get panic attacks, I end up on the couch in the living room instead of my bed. They understand that it has been a rough night by that point. My male roommate nathan actually wanted to know more. He wanted to make sure that he wasn't hurting me and wanted to help when he could. I sat down and explained what gluten is and what it is in (he thought it was in all foods). I give very specific instructions when in the kitchen and food is being made for all three of us. When I am not feeling good, he doesn't usually ask about the symptoms but he will ask how he can help. I don't know if you need to go into gory details because I think they get it, but they more or less want to know how to help you feel better.

Pegleg84 Collaborator
Pegleg84
Posted

Aw, your roommate is a sweetie.

 

You don't have to go into gory details, but don't have to have a "ladies don't poop" attitude either. My man picked up some sort of stomach bug on vacation and it was pretty nasty for a few weeks. He didn't want to describe it but I'm like "man, you have no idea the stuff I hear on the celiac forum, so you really can't gross me out". He's like "How do you put up with this all the time?"

 

But really, saying you feel like crap and get stuck on the toilet for an hour is really all the mental picture you need to give. If you SO is understanding, that's all he'll need to hear. Don't go into more detail than you're comfortable with, but don't be afraid to scare him away (cause if you do, then he wasn't worth it anyway). 

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