The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

[ranger]

whoops. Sorry!

[psawyer]

What are you making, POeter?

Tacos.

Psilly pharting was indeed a juicy hot topic once upon a time. It was a real gas. I note with some interest that many posters here insist that their spouse/partner is much more prolific in this regard than they are. Me, I just try to stay upwind.

Airplanes don't make me phart, but air security makes me sick. I used to fly all the time and was in Air Canada's top frequent flier tier, but have not left the ground in over four years. I do need to figure out what to do with more than a quarter million Aeroplan points before they expire.

[ranger]

Go to Russia. You don't need good food, you need a good experience.

[curlyfries]

I do need to figure out what to do with more than a quarter million Aeroplan points before they expire.

What are you doin just sittin there????? Go to Hawaii and tell Jess what to do!!!!

Seriously, though......if you know you won't be able to use them up in time, I wonder if you can donate them?

When I had to fly down to Houston, we learned that the airlines give reduced rates for family emergencies...medical emergencies....something like that. It would be awesome to be able to help out people that are requesting this rate by covering the remainder due with your points. I wonder if that is possible.

[jerseyangel]

Psilly pharting was indeed a juicy hot topic once upon a time.

Good times! I remember they were even alluding to it on other threads. Epic

[Jestgar]

Tacos.

Psilly pharting was indeed a juicy hot topic once upon a time.

Good times! I remember they were even alluding to it on other threads. Epic

Wasn't there a chart? a song? a monument erected some where?

[elye]

Airplanes don't make me phart, but air security makes me sick.

Dunno why......this struck me as heeeelyarryus..... ..

I think I have actually seen this on a bumper sticker.

I do need to figure out what to do with more than a quarter million Aeroplan points before they expire.

Seriously, though......if you know you won't be able to use them up in time, I wonder if you can donate them?

When I had to fly down to Houston, we learned that the airlines give reduced rates for family emergencies...medical emergencies....something like that. It would be awesome to be able to help out people that are requesting this rate by covering the remainder due with your points. I wonder if that is possible.

No, no... . ..... . ..just give them all to me.

Go to Russia. You don't need good food, you need a good experience.

Again, something making me larf loud and long.

Now,this I KNOW I have seen on a bumper sticker. Actually, wait......I know where I have seen this - - it is the official, translated travel slogan for Air Minsk.

Wasn't there a chart? a song? a monument erected some where?

Yep. Keys to various cities were handed out, trumpets blown, battle cries resounding... . . ....

[flourgirl]

Yep. Keys to various cities were handed out, trumpets blown, battle cries resounding... . . ....

Ummm...Em? I think you have mistaken the trumpets and battle cries. More like trumpet strumpet methane blasts and cries of agony

Ranger Slew crakin' us all up....again!

Cold wet rainy day. Trying desperately to phind some ambition to get something done here besides curling up wif a binky and book! Maybe if I close all of the drapes and turn on all of the lights _{crank up the heat to 80}

[ranger]

Keys? Trumpets? Battles? Me thinks Em might be hittin the bottle or mabe a little run in with an haluccigenic master-baiter.

OK. Hears the skinny on the phart Question, which I know you guys are all done with but when it comes to the gassy side of life, I can't let go even though some say I go on and on but I reasure you that I don't nor would never corrode my lack of integrity with any kind of sticktoitiveness or go overboard on any topic except of course the fine art of the phart Which to me is in line with other phart forms and gaseous formulations that totally dessicrate and purturb the mere echolons and colons of any and all. Gaaaasp!

Men fart more than women. Scientific factuation! There is a pair of rubber shorts you can wear, that has a tube protruding from the rear and leading up to two clear plastic "holding tanks" that are worn on a harness on your back. "They" picked a female and a male rancher and put them in this get up and told them to go about thier day. At the end of the day, they submerged the tanks in water to measure

the volume of gasses collected The female farted 2 liters. The male farted 2.3 liters. OMG ! Thats a lot of gas!

Butt, it settled the question, and the only way we could settle it would be for all of us to get a pair of these special shorts and all wear them on the same day.

Pick the day!

Sleezen

[elye]

There is a pair of rubber shorts you can wear, that has a tube protruding from the rear and leading up to two clear plastic "holding tanks" that are worn on a harness on your back. "They" picked a female and a male rancher and put them in this get up and told them to go about thier day. At the end of the day, they submerged the tanks in water to measure

the volume of gasses collected The female farted 2 liters. The male farted 2.3 liters. OMG ! Thats a lot of gas!

Butt, it settled the question, and the only way we could settle it would be for all of us to get a pair of these special shorts and all wear them on the same day.

Holy crap! I'm in! Can we pick up these flatulent holding tanks with padded harnesses at Walmart? Hope so, as we Canucks ain't got no Weggies up here... . . .....

[elye]

Hey! They've got 'em fer cattle.. .. ... .. .

If there is a bovine model, there has GOT to be a human version. . ...

[Jestgar]

Does that thing have a valve with a pilot light so it can turn into a jet-pack after filling?

[ranger]

Hey! They've got 'em fer cattle.. .. ... .. .

If there is a bovine model, there has GOT to be a human version. . ...

:lol:Where do you get these pics?

AmAmAm.... The human version is the only version. At least, that I know about. Look closely at the pic. You can see that the vital tube is coming from the wrong end. While you can measure the gass from a cilli-yaks ass, you can't measure anything emoting from the BRAIN of an avowed Siily-yack. Because we, as a group, are lacking that basic faculty, even though some of us are teachers and diatribalists. Some of us are lacking butts and tits, some of us have an overabundance of butts and tits, and some of us have balls ( like Petra and I) but, none of us have working brains.

An exactitude from your fiend, Sneezy Sloozy.

BTW - where's Suzy? Is she OK?

[Mtndog]

OK- need everyone here stat to let out HOT flatulence all night long cause we might get SNAUGH :ph34r: Pieter and Ptaum- Since you let out more get here now!!!!!!!!!!!!

How's that for an offer you can't refuse?

[elye]

Does that thing have a valve with a pilot light so it can turn into a jet-pack after filling?

Holy gawd, if it does my DH could blast himself to Helsinki. . . . ....... . .

While you can measure the gass from a cilli-yaks ass,

Truly Seussian phrasing .. . . . . .. . ...

An exactitude from your fiend, Sneezy Sloozy.

Hey! I think this is one of the seven dwarves......

Um, or dwarfs. .. . .. . ....

Roof, roofs....... . .

calf, calves. . . . ..... . ...

Hmmmm....penis, penii.. . . . . .. ...

I know this one doesn't refute nor support the plural form in question....I just love writing this form.

I need to think of two scholastic, instructive grammatical sentence structures for this plural form in my cloze exercises for the intermediate students.. . . . .....

Jean-Luc has a penis.

His brother also has a penis.

Together, they have two penii.

Yep, that about demonstrates it all.

[elye]

Yes, where in hell is Soooozle? Have seen her fleetingly posting in Da Book.....

Hope all is okay.

And Patteigh! She is very busy and stress-ridden with the house closing. . . ......

We miss you guys!!!

[ranger]

Goodnight, my fallow sillys (can I call you that?). It is cold and wet here in Ohio -and that is in the house. But, I was able to pick fresh basil to put on my chicken and vege Alfredo and it was GOOD. It won't be there much longer. Nor may I. After all the broccoli I ate tonight, I will be probably be like an exploding cow am.

Remember, the family that pharts together, stays together.

Dominique , the QOF

[JNBunnie1]

Hi everybody!!!

Joodee, I'm so happy you sold your house, and found a home for the kitty, and you get to take a road trip!! YAY!!!!

How's the practicing going, Manda-mae?

Hey, you guys want onion dip, try this recipe:

1 medium onion diced

1 cup mayo

3 cup swiss cheese shredded (or cheddar)

1 egg

little pepper

Bake at 325 for 20 min or until golden brown.

I suppose it's technically a cheese dip. You will make goofy noises when you taste this the first time.

So I has owwies.... I realized this past weekend how bad I was getting with the sugar and starches and bad food so I went cold turkey- no sugar, no flour, no fried, no white, trying to stay with raw dairy. Felt like crap all week and had the world's worst diarrhea today. I ventured to eat some breakfast around 10 (I get up at 4:30, mind you) and I got to see it again an hour later. I don't wanna take anything because this is obviously neccessary, but it made for an awkward day at work.

Anyone else ever consider just buying adult diapers and having done with it?

And I do NOT want to hear about anyone else's SigO farting, ok? My boyfriend, at first, seemed FREAKISHLY abnormal. HE NEVER FARTED. EVER. Not even in his sleep. So after about six months of eating gluten free with me at home, he binges while we're out somewhere on gluten, and proceeds to spend the entire night farting so incredibly horribly ferociously offensively that I got up at one point to pee, came back in the bedroom and gagged. Boy is it hard to make me do that. Guess who's gluten intolerant? Heheheheheh...

[Mtndog]

Remember, the family that pharts together, stays together.

Dominique , the QOF

:lol: We'll be together forever!

Hi everybody!!!

And I do NOT want to hear about anyone else's SigO farting, ok? My boyfriend, at first, seemed FREAKISHLY abnormal. HE NEVER FARTED. EVER. Not even in his sleep. So after about six months of eating gluten free with me at home, he binges while we're out somewhere on gluten, and proceeds to spend the entire night farting so incredibly horribly ferociously offensively that I got up at one point to pee, came back in the bedroom and gagged. Boy is it hard to make me do that. Guess who's gluten intolerant? Heheheheheh...

:lol: Phart Phest.

There are 12- yes, 12 guests reading at this very moment :lol: :ph34r:

Hi Em- I SEE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[elye]

1 medium onion diced

1 cup mayo

3 cup swiss cheese shredded (or cheddar)

1 egg

little pepper

Bake at 325 for 20 min or until golden brown.

OMG.... . . .. This look amazing, Buh-kneeee. . ... . . .....:drooooolface:

[elye]

Whoa.....14 guests reading along??

Who ARE you guys? Come clean!

[elye]

Hey. . . . . . . ... .... . . ....Lookit my post count. . . .... . . .. ......

In exactly one thousand posts, what will happen to me?

Will I catch fire?. . .. . ........

[Jestgar]

Hey. . . . . . . ... .... . . ....Lookit my post count. . . .... . . .. ......

In exactly one thousand posts, what will happen to me?

Will I catch fire?. . .. . ........

oooohhhhhh

I think Patti may have been condemned sent to Texas when hers flipped.

[DingoGirl]

PSILLIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am sooooooooooooooo behind. Will catch up tomorrow, love you all, got sick (PHLUGHUE! )

and am better.

But, I'd just like to say, I saw a record FORTY guests online :lol:

Love you sills!!!

will catch up and write later.

just realized I wrote FORTY, and meant TWENTY.

sorry, pholks, am losing my mind lately, too much mucous in brain.

[elye]

Good morning, Psilliests!

I believe that we have a new administrative announcement thingy appearing in our posts - - the official note that "this post has been edited by so-and-so at 11:39 am". Or perhaps it has appeared for ages and I have been characteristically oblivious.

I kind of don't want people to know this. . ... ... . .if I make a spelling error, or suddenly think, "Crap, I did NOT mean to scare that newbie with such words", I like to slip in clandestinely, fix things up and get the hell out.

Where could this lead? We have a server notification of editing. . . .. .....soon we may start seeing things like, "this post was typed by elye on laptop as she sat on the toilet", or "Dear gawd, you should see what elye is wearing as she posts this".... ..

Who knows how far it may go?