Jump to content
This site uses cookies. Continued use is acceptance of our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy. More Info... ×

  • Welcome to Celiac.com!

    You have found your celiac tribe! Join us and ask questions in our forum, share your story, and connect with others.



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A1):

    Celiac.com Sponsor (A1-M):

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Our Content
    eNewsletter
    Donate

Inappropriate Gifts

floridanative

Recommended Posts

floridanative Community Regular
floridanative
Posted

Okay - we went out to eat last night with dear friends to one of our new fave places Wildfire Grill. It was my fourth time there and their first. They were there upon our arrive as we met there and the female of the couple was holding a little bag but it wasn't that noticeable so it slipped my mind and we went in to enjoy a fantastic meal. After we all paid the server my friend handed me the bag and said Merry Christmas - slightly odd since this couple doesn't celebrate the season as they are agnostic. I tried to put the bag on my chair but she insisted we open it right then. Now I'm really feeling strange since we have known the guy for about 10 years and his new wife for three and we have NEVER exchanged gifts of any kind with them. Okay, I reach in and there are too small calendars - Monet for me and Dali for DH. Okay - these are not pricey and I like lots of calendars so I can use them. Next there is a long linen envelope........like something that would hold a gift check or card. There is no writing on the outside so I open it up and it's a $50 gift card to Wildfire - where were are still sitting. Now I'm mortified.........we have nothing to give them since we've never gotten a gift from them, we'd never think to get them anything and remember - they don't really celebrate Christmas like we do anyway. We thanked them profusely but DH never knew the amt. until we were in the car alone and he was perplexed when he found out. This couple is very conservative when it comes to spending money so they are the last people we'd ever suspect doing something this extravagant.

We still don't know what's up but I mailed a formal TY note to them today. It was the most thoughtful gift I've been giving since my dx last Jan. but still.......I don't think it was appropriate given our history. What do you think and how have you handled the same situation?

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


CarlaB Enthusiast
CarlaB
Posted

All you can do is say thank you. At some point, you touched them and they felt like buying you a gift. Certainly they are aware that it was "out of the blue" as much as you were!! If you feel motivated, buy them something as well, but don't feel obligated as it might start a new tradition.

floridanative Community Regular
floridanative
Posted
  • Author
All you can do is say thank you. At some point, you touched them and they felt like buying you a gift. Certainly they are aware that it was "out of the blue" as much as you were!! If you feel motivated, buy them something as well, but don't feel obligated as it might start a new tradition.

Good thinking Carla and I love your new pic btw. We are having a New Years Day lunch here and inviting them along with others so hopefully that will suffice in a way.

angel-jd1 Community Regular
angel-jd1
Posted

I think that the formal thank you was the right move. Another option is to use that gift cert. and take THEM out to eat and use it together. That way you are both getting some joy out of the gift and perhaps it will make you feel less guilty. Good food and good company go together right :)

-Jessica :rolleyes:

Okay - we went out to eat last night with dear friends to one of our new fave places Wildfire Grill. It was my fourth time there and their first. They were there upon our arrive as we met there and the female of the couple was holding a little bag but it wasn't that noticeable so it slipped my mind and we went in to enjoy a fantastic meal. After we all paid the server my friend handed me the bag and said Merry Christmas - slightly odd since this couple doesn't celebrate the season as they are agnostic. I tried to put the bag on my chair but she insisted we open it right then. Now I'm really feeling strange since we have known the guy for about 10 years and his new wife for three and we have NEVER exchanged gifts of any kind with them. Okay, I reach in and there are too small calendars - Monet for me and Dali for DH. Okay - these are not pricey and I like lots of calendars so I can use them. Next there is a long linen envelope........like something that would hold a gift check or card. There is no writing on the outside so I open it up and it's a $50 gift card to Wildfire - where were are still sitting. Now I'm mortified.........we have nothing to give them since we've never gotten a gift from them, we'd never think to get them anything and remember - they don't really celebrate Christmas like we do anyway. We thanked them profusely but DH never knew the amt. until we were in the car alone and he was perplexed when he found out. This couple is very conservative when it comes to spending money so they are the last people we'd ever suspect doing something this extravagant.

We still don't know what's up but I mailed a formal TY note to them today. It was the most thoughtful gift I've been giving since my dx last Jan. but still.......I don't think it was appropriate given our history. What do you think and how have you handled the same situation?

CarlaB Enthusiast
CarlaB
Posted
Good thinking Carla and I love your new pic btw. We are having a New Years Day lunch here and inviting them along with others so hopefully that will suffice in a way.

Thank you.

That should be a good "pay back."

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted

It was a good thought that you sent the thank you note. I would have probably been surprised if someone I least expected gave me a gift but it was a nice gesture. Maybe it was her way of saying they cared.

plantime Contributor
plantime
Posted

I am guilty of doing that to people I know. I just feel the urge to give someone a gift, and the urge does not go away until I give it. I look at it as God using me to help someone in some way that I may never understand. I never expect a gift in return, as your friends probably do not. The formal thank you card was wonderful, and inviting them to your New Year's get-together is a good idea, too.

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


breann6 Contributor
breann6
Posted

The thank-you was nice and probably knowing you like the restaurant so much and how much you will enjoy it was all they wanted. I have done things like that out of the blue for friends and thats actually when i usally do things for them- it means more that way to me, un-obligated gifting means you were truely thought of in the most sincere form of friendship, in my book anyway. Not inappropriate at all :) like the old saying goes, its not the gift that counts its the thoughtfulness :D

~breann

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Go to topic listing
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A19):


  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      130,870
    • Most Online (within 30 mins)
      7,748
    Chaoticcrud
    Newest Member
    Chaoticcrud
    Joined
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A20):

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      121.3k
    • Total Posts
      1m
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A22):



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A21):


  • Upcoming Events

  • Posts

    • trents
      Diagnosed w Celiacs, but reacting to gluten-free Digiorno Pizza AND Kraft Zesty Italian Dressing

      By trents · Posted

      As I suspected, xanthan gum is one of the ingredients. It is a polysaccharide used as a texturing agent in many gluten-free products. It's hard to digest and causes distress for many celiacs. I can't say for sure if that was the problem but you might be on the lookout for it in the future. Muscle spasms can be caused by magnesium deficiency. Are you taking any vitamin and mineral supplements? I mean some things more potent than a multivitamin?
    • Wheatwacked
      Gluten-Free Newbie

      By Wheatwacked · Posted

      Hello @Suze046 In the western world 40 to 60 percent are low or deficient in Vitamin D.  Malabsorption from Celiac Disease, avoidance of UV from the sun and seasonal variations can result in low vitamin D.  A simple 25(OH)D test will tell you your status.  Low vitamin D affects immune system, bone health, mental health.  I keep mine around 80 ng/ml (200 nmol/L). Choline has many functions in our body.  From the neurotransmitter Acetylcholine to fat digestion.  It is made by our bodies but in insufficient amount.  The major dietary source is from beef and eggs.  The RDA is 500 mg a day.  That would be equivelant to 3 eggs or 10 cups of cooked brocolli a day.  Choline is a significant portion of biliary phospholipids and is a crucial element for bile function.n.  I found taking Phosphatidly Choline capsules helps.  A homocysteine test can be indicative of choline deficiency.  Could we be overlooking a potential choline crisis in the United Kingdom? NIH Choline Fact Sheet Vitamin D Is Not as Toxic as Was Once Thought
    • annamarie6655
      Diagnosed w Celiacs, but reacting to gluten-free Digiorno Pizza AND Kraft Zesty Italian Dressing

      By annamarie6655 · Posted

      @trents thank you so much for your response!  When i was diagnosed, I was exhibiting mainly joint pain, hair loss, bloating, and allodynia (painful feeling from non painful stimuli). The muscle spasms only started after diagnosis, and it seems to only happen when I am severely glutened. It’s only happened twice, but it definitely makes me nervous when it happens.    In regard to the pizza, thats what i saw after i got sick from it. I’m still trying to figure out how to switch to ALL certified gluten-free goods.    for the dressing, here is the ingredient list:  WATER, VEGETABLE OIL, VINEGAR, SUGAR, GARLIC, SALT, RED BELL PEPPER, ONION, CONCENTRATED LEMON JUICE, XANTHAN GUM, POTASSIUM SORBATE, HERBS, CALCIUM DISODIUM EDTA, MONOACETIN, SPICES. and the link: https://www.kraftheinz.com/en-CA/kraft/products/00068100903577-zesty-italian-salad-dressing  
    • trents
      Diagnosed w Celiacs, but reacting to gluten-free Digiorno Pizza AND Kraft Zesty Italian Dressing

      By trents · Posted

      Welcome to the forum, @annamarie6655! Are the muscle spasms and joint aches a new pattern of reaction to gluten or have you experienced these in the past? Concerning DeGiorno's "gluten-free" pizza, we have had many reports from celiac.com members of gluten reactions from consuming this product. I believe it is one of those "gluten-free" products that is made from wheat (speaking of the crust component) that has been processed in such a way as to remove most of the gluten. The FDA regs allow food companies to use the claim "gluten-free" as long as the product contains no more than 20ppm of gluten. This works for most celiacs but not for those on the more sensitive end of the spectrum. There is another industry standard known as "Certified Gluten-Free" that is stricter, requiring no more than 10ppm of gluten. Certified Gluten-Free products use the "GFCO" logo. Concerning the salad dressing, could you list the ingredients in another post or link it? There are certain other ingredients besides gluten commonly used in gluten-free manufactured food items to give them acceptable textures that give a lot of celiacs problems. 
    • annamarie6655
      Diagnosed w Celiacs, but reacting to gluten-free Digiorno Pizza AND Kraft Zesty Italian Dressing

      By annamarie6655 · Posted

      Hello, so I was diagnosed with Celiacs about 8 months ago. After being diagnosed, I have been trying very hard to maintain a completely gluten-free (and celiac safe) diet.  Two of the main times I had a huge reaction, it was from: - gluten-free Digiorno Pizza w Pepperoni - Kraft Zesty Italian Dressing (this was in canada if that changes anything) Both are marked as gluten-free. Following eating these items, I had a severe bout of diarrhea, uncontrollable and heavy muscle spasms throughout my whole body, and aching throughout every joint.   If these are both gluten-free, why would I be reacting to them? Should I be worried about a separate allergy?  In regards to the muscle spasms, should I follow up with someone about that?
×
×
  • Create New...