Feeling Down

[foodiegurl]

I have felt really positive since I found out about having this, 2 weeks ago, and all the sudden today, I feel totally depressed. And it is not because I cant eat this or that. That part, I feel pretty OK about. I had already been very specific about the things we ate, voluntarily,...so now this is just one one thing (albeit major) that I have to cut out.

Maybe it was because when I woke up this morning, I kept thinking the words "I have a chronic disease, I have a chronic illness" and that depresses the h*ll out of me. I just don't get it...why??!! I feel fine.

I first found out I have the h.pylori bacteria, so my DH was tested...since he has horrible tummy issues. All his tests for everything, including celiac, came back normal. Of course I am thrilled for him...but he is the one with the tummy issues, and I am the one who ends up with a digestive disease! And how the heck did I get the h.pylori :(

Sorry, I guess I am feeling a bit sorry for myself today. My daughter turns 4 tomorrow, and that makes me a bit weepy too, though I know I need to focus on her big day and make it wonderful.

When i met with the GI dr, we agreed I would go gluten-free after her party (this coming weekend),and this morning I made 2 batches of snickerdoodles for her to bring to school (regular flour), and maybe it depressed me, because it would be the last time I would ever bake that recipe that has become one of my standard favorites.

Though, I did make a gluten-free cornbread, and yesterday enjoyed it warmed with butter and honey, and was one of the best things ever.

I just hate thinking..I have a 'disease'. I am so sick of the word 'Celiac', I want to scream.

My blood work was all conclusive for Celiac, so, so far I have refused the biopsy. And of course now i am worried, maybe I should get it so they can see if something else is wrong My biggest fear is dying and leaving my daughter without a mom. And then I am worried I will have the biopsy and die from complications of it.

Sorry this is so disjointed, just needed to vent.

thanks.

[flourgirl]

Hi Foodiegirl,

Believe it or not you are having normal reactions to the whole thing. Your body in crisis (your body struggling with absorbtion and a whole host of things from Celiac) can make you feel "off". You are having to come to terms with the idea that you have this "disease" for which there is no cure. You need to know in your mind that you can control it, and you can arrest any further damage to yourself. Personally I call it a condition and not a "disease". I'm not dying, I'm not going to be ill forever, either. Anyway...that's one of my coping measures. Sounds like you are still new to the whole thing, so give yourself time to gather information, and time to learn about this new eating lifestyle. You'll realize that you really are not giving up a whole food group (or several groups, as some have), but that you can substitute some items, or use different brands. Most of us find that eating non-pre-processed foods, while not as convenient, is certainly more healthy for all of us. It is not going to hurt us to give up preservatives, chemicals, plastics or whatever they are putting into food these days. No wonder so many people are having weight, health issues these days! We are not meant to eat so many things that are in our food.

You have found a great place for information and understanding. There are many people here who have helped me so much! You will probably have bad days ahead, down days, miserable days....but you are going to have many, many more good days that will far outweigh this time of trials. You are welcome to come here for a shoulder....or share some good news or information that you've found. I wish you luck as you start this new journey!

[skymgirl]

I have felt really positive since I found out about having this, 2 weeks ago, and all the sudden today, I feel totally depressed. And it is not because I cant eat this or that. That part, I feel pretty OK about. I had already been very specific about the things we ate, voluntarily,...so now this is just one one thing (albeit major) that I have to cut out.

Maybe it was because when I woke up this morning, I kept thinking the words "I have a chronic disease, I have a chronic illness" and that depresses the h*ll out of me. I just don't get it...why??!! I feel fine.

I first found out I have the h.pylori bacteria, so my DH was tested...since he has horrible tummy issues. All his tests for everything, including celiac, came back normal. Of course I am thrilled for him...but he is the one with the tummy issues, and I am the one who ends up with a digestive disease! And how the heck did I get the h.pylori :(

Sorry, I guess I am feeling a bit sorry for myself today. My daughter turns 4 tomorrow, and that makes me a bit weepy too, though I know I need to focus on her big day and make it wonderful.

When i met with the GI dr, we agreed I would go gluten-free after her party (this coming weekend),and this morning I made 2 batches of snickerdoodles for her to bring to school (regular flour), and maybe it depressed me, because it would be the last time I would ever bake that recipe that has become one of my standard favorites.

Though, I did make a gluten-free cornbread, and yesterday enjoyed it warmed with butter and honey, and was one of the best things ever.

I just hate thinking..I have a 'disease'. I am so sick of the word 'Celiac', I want to scream.

My blood work was all conclusive for Celiac, so, so far I have refused the biopsy. And of course now i am worried, maybe I should get it so they can see if something else is wrong My biggest fear is dying and leaving my daughter without a mom. And then I am worried I will have the biopsy and die from complications of it.

Sorry this is so disjointed, just needed to vent.

thanks.

Sorry you are going through this - you and I are in a similar place. I got my diagnosis of Celiac last Wednesday, then was diagnosed with Crohn's on Friday...it was a rough week. I have been going back and forth between being relieved that I have a diagnosis to angry that I have two diseases. Then I feel ridiculous for being upset about either of them because I don't have something fatal. I'm going through a whole spectrum right now.

I have the fear about the biopsies, too. (I have a colonoscopy in my future...ugh) I'm afraid of anesthesia and get all mopey about the process and possible complications. But then I think of how I am a huge baseball fan, and how many times my favorite players have surgical procedures, and I think I'll be ok. I think it's just a lot to handle right now.

In the beginning I think we need to be gentle with ourselves while we're coming to terms with it. We're allowed to be sad, but we should also feel better that the diet will help us feel better. I think as you get more comfortable with your new lifestyle, things will become easier. In the meantime, I wish you hopeful feelings and comfort.

[jordanandnadia]

I was diagnosed over 6 years ago and have been on a strict gluten-free diet since then. All I can say is what you're feeling is totally normal. Those crappy feelings will get less and less over time. Most days I'm totally fine, it doesn't get me down at all. But every so often things happen that make you feel depressed and upset, and it sucks.

It gets better, just remember you're healthier in the long run and by sticking to a gluten-free diet you'll be around longer for your daughter.

And as an aside - do yourself the favor and get the biopsy done if you can. It never hurts, and will give you some peace of mind so you can focus on enjoying life.

[CeliacMom2008]

Although I am do not have Celiac, I can relate. Even more so maybe - what's worse than having something? Your child having it. So please know there is hope for the blah times. When our son was first diagnosed we went through the roller coaster of emotions. I can't tell you how many "date nights" were my hubby and me sitting at a pizza place with me watching families laugh, eat pizza, and have a "normal" night out while I cried my eyes out. But it has gotten much, much better. When I do have the bad days, I try very hard to make myself not focus on the permanence of the diagnosis. Researchers have found so many cures for so many things in our world. On my good days I don't even care if a super pill is discovered one day that would allow him to eat whatever he wants. On my bad days I just cling to getting through that day, that moment and tell myself that the day may soon be here when Celiac is a thing of the past. But those "bad" days are so much fewer and farther between now. So cry, kick, or mope your way through today and tomorrow will probably be brighter. And I PROMISE once spring gets here life will feel so much better all around! This winter has been brutal!

[foodiegurl]

Although I am do not have Celiac, I can relate. Even more so maybe - what's worse than having something? Your child having it. So please know there is hope for the blah times. When our son was first diagnosed we went through the roller coaster of emotions. I can't tell you how many "date nights" were my hubby and me sitting at a pizza place with me watching families laugh, eat pizza, and have a "normal" night out while I cried my eyes out. But it has gotten much, much better. When I do have the bad days, I try very hard to make myself not focus on the permanence of the diagnosis. Researchers have found so many cures for so many things in our world. On my good days I don't even care if a super pill is discovered one day that would allow him to eat whatever he wants. On my bad days I just cling to getting through that day, that moment and tell myself that the day may soon be here when Celiac is a thing of the past. But those "bad" days are so much fewer and farther between now. So cry, kick, or mope your way through today and tomorrow will probably be brighter. And I PROMISE once spring gets here life will feel so much better all around! This winter has been brutal!

I see you are in the Midwest, are you in the Chicago-area too?

Thank you everyone for the pep talk, it has really helped.

It probably doesn't help that i just ate 2 fresh out-of-the-oven snicker doodles that i made for my daughters class tomorrow. Wow they tasted divine...though I bet I will regret it later. Even though I am not gluten-free 100% yet, I have been about 98% for the last 2 weeks. These cookies have been the only purposeful eating of gluten since I found out.

I just find it frustrating that there are people out there who eat horribly, fast food, trans fats, processed foods, etc...and I have always been so careful, and then i get this. Like eating healthy and carefully all these years did not good

[The Kids Folks]

Welcome aboard - it may seem at times that this is all really really difficult, and then one day you wake up and go "hey, I don't feel like crap any more!!" We have been gluten free for 5 months now and it is getting better every day. I wanted to let you know that you don't need to give up homemade snickerdoodles (well, okay you do have to change your flour) - but believe it or not you can bake pretty much everything gluten -free!! Yes, I bake snickerdoodles, and brownies and chocolate chip cookies and get to eat them all warm right out of the oven.

Early on in our gluten free journey I met someone at a natural foods store - I had this glazed over look as I was staring at the mixes - which flour was good, do I have to use a mix, can I ever bake again - I was truly overwhelmed and definitely starting to get tears in my eyes. I turned and there was this woman (who I refer to as my angel on earth!) She told me that I could bake everything that I wanted to even out of my current cookbooks, I just needed to get the right flour. She then went on to tell me that she orders this Tom Sawyer Gluten Free flour online. She said that her family has been gluten free for a couple of years and even her extended family uses this flour now. I know this totally sounds like a commercial but it totally happened!

I know that other people on this forum also use Better Batter flour. Which is also supposed to be really good. No science experiments with either - you get to bake cup for cup!!

So hang in there foodie girl, you have already found great support in this forum. Soon you too will be sharing your successes with us and new members!

The Kids Folks

[foodiegurl]

Welcome aboard - it may seem at times that this is all really really difficult, and then one day you wake up and go "hey, I don't feel like crap any more!!" We have been gluten free for 5 months now and it is getting better every day. I wanted to let you know that you don't need to give up homemade snickerdoodles (well, okay you do have to change your flour) - but believe it or not you can bake pretty much everything gluten -free!! Yes, I bake snickerdoodles, and brownies and chocolate chip cookies and get to eat them all warm right out of the oven.

Early on in our gluten free journey I met someone at a natural foods store - I had this glazed over look as I was staring at the mixes - which flour was good, do I have to use a mix, can I ever bake again - I was truly overwhelmed and definitely starting to get tears in my eyes. I turned and there was this woman (who I refer to as my angel on earth!) She told me that I could bake everything that I wanted to even out of my current cookbooks, I just needed to get the right flour. She then went on to tell me that she orders this Tom Sawyer Gluten Free flour online. She said that her family has been gluten free for a couple of years and even her extended family uses this flour now. I know this totally sounds like a commercial but it totally happened!

I know that other people on this forum also use Better Batter flour. Which is also supposed to be really good. No science experiments with either - you get to bake cup for cup!!

So hang in there foodie girl, you have already found great support in this forum. Soon you too will be sharing your successes with us and new members!

The Kids Folks

It is great to hear you say that. I LOVE baking from scratch. And the past week, I did try a few gluten-free mixes, and they actually were pretty tasty. But, I want to do it from scratch, not a a mix. And yes, all the flours overwhelm me and how you have to add a binder, and check the weight...argh!! I know I will get the hang of it, it just takes time.

The other week, I went to a gluten-free bakery here, called Rose's..and they did have amazing snickerdoodles as well as gluten-free oatmeal cookies, eclairs, cupcakes, biscotti, french bread. The woman working there was super nice, and could tell I was having tears of joy when I walked in the store. she definitely lifted my spirits that week. I did buy some Bob's Red Mill biscuit mix yesterday to make strawberry shortcake tomorrow for my daughter's bday. And tomorrow, I am going to make a trip to the local health food store.

Thank you everyone for all of your encouragement!!

[The Kids Folks]

It is great to hear you say that. I LOVE baking from scratch. And the past week, I did try a few gluten-free mixes, and they actually were pretty tasty. But, I want to do it from scratch, not a a mix. And yes, all the flours overwhelm me and how you have to add a binder, and check the weight...argh!! I know I will get the hang of it, it just takes time.

The other week, I went to a gluten-free bakery here, called Rose's..and they did have amazing snickerdoodles as well as gluten-free oatmeal cookies, eclairs, cupcakes, biscotti, french bread. The woman working there was super nice, and could tell I was having tears of joy when I walked in the store. she definitely lifted my spirits that week. I did buy some Bob's Red Mill biscuit mix yesterday to make strawberry shortcake tomorrow for my daughter's bday. And tomorrow, I am going to make a trip to the local health food store.

Thank you everyone for all of your encouragement!!

Good Morning Foodiegurl-

OMG - I forgot to tell you the best part about the gluten-free flours that I mentioned. No binders, no checking the weight, nothing!! You just pull out that old gluten recipe cookbook, pick your old favorite recipe and BAKE!! Now I will say that I have found that on occasion you do have to adjust the baking time, but I'm not really sure why. But the food comes out great. I am still working on cakes, the consistency with Tom Sawyer is a little dense, although others have said that Better Batter is "better" for cake!

I've told others on this board that my 7 yr old DS won third prize in his cub scout bake off with this gluten free choc chip cookies!!

Happy Baking from Scratch!

The Kids Folks

[ranger]

I have felt really positive since I found out about having this, 2 weeks ago, and all the sudden today, I feel totally depressed. And it is not because I cant eat this or that. That part, I feel pretty OK about. I had already been very specific about the things we ate, voluntarily,...so now this is just one one thing (albeit major) that I have to cut out.

Maybe it was because when I woke up this morning, I kept thinking the words "I have a chronic disease, I have a chronic illness" and that depresses the h*ll out of me. I just don't get it...why??!! I feel fine.

I first found out I have the h.pylori bacteria, so my DH was tested...since he has horrible tummy issues. All his tests for everything, including celiac, came back normal. Of course I am thrilled for him...but he is the one with the tummy issues, and I am the one who ends up with a digestive disease! And how the heck did I get the h.pylori :(

Sorry, I guess I am feeling a bit sorry for myself today. My daughter turns 4 tomorrow, and that makes me a bit weepy too, though I know I need to focus on her big day and make it wonderful.

When i met with the GI dr, we agreed I would go gluten-free after her party (this coming weekend),and this morning I made 2 batches of snickerdoodles for her to bring to school (regular flour), and maybe it depressed me, because it would be the last time I would ever bake that recipe that has become one of my standard favorites.

Though, I did make a gluten-free cornbread, and yesterday enjoyed it warmed with butter and honey, and was one of the best things ever.

I just hate thinking..I have a 'disease'. I am so sick of the word 'Celiac', I want to scream.

My blood work was all conclusive for Celiac, so, so far I have refused the biopsy. And of course now i am worried, maybe I should get it so they can see if something else is wrong My biggest fear is dying and leaving my daughter without a mom. And then I am worried I will have the biopsy and die from complications of it.

Sorry this is so disjointed, just needed to vent.

thanks.

Iv'e been gluten free for 2 months now, and just finished eating a gluten-free snickerdoodle. Can't remember were I got the recipe, but it would be easy to find on the net. Are you a "foodie" as your name implies? I am, so it was devastating to find out that I would have to relinquish what I thaught was such an intrikle part of my diet But, I practiced and now can create great food without gluten. This has not been without some major mistakes! The only thing I miss is being able to stop and pick up something for dinner at the last minute. Everything I eat has to be homeade and that requires way more planning than I used to do. For example. I spend a day a week at the local hospital with a friend who is going through chemo (for 2 years now). I used to grab something in the cafeteria- not good food, but cheap. Now,I have to pack everything I'm going to eat that day and, since I eat 6 small meals a day, that takes a considerable amout of planning. Take heart. Once you learn the ropes of gluten-free cooking, you will be able to eat well and probably healthier. Happy belated b-day to your DD Susan

[FarmCat]

My blood work was all conclusive for Celiac, so, so far I have refused the biopsy. And of course now i am worried, maybe I should get it so they can see if something else is wrong My biggest fear is dying and leaving my daughter without a mom. And then I am worried I will have the biopsy and die from complications of it.

Just a quick two cents about biopsies. I had mine this morning! and it was a piece of cake. They don't use general anesthesia, just a sedative. I got sleepy and the next thing I knew, they were wheeling me back into my room and it was done. Not even a sore throat afterward.

So if you do choose to have one, it's quick and easy (at least, in MY experience.)

[DownWithGluten]

Oh yeah. Go ahead and feel sorry for yourself. Maybe we have to keep our chins up as much as we can during life, but at least feel here is a safe place to complain. Because at the end of the day, it does kinda suck and it is an inconvenience. People end up living with and dealing with what they're dealt...they do...but it doesn't mean we don't have the right to feel down about it now and then. If that stopped us from being productive and all, that's not good...but I guess I'm saying, yes, feel free to vent and feel down sometimes.

Dang gluten! Dang those years (when I thought, anyway) I had the freedom to eat as I pleased and took it for granted! lol.