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Handling Extended Family's Dinner Hostings When They're Not gluten-free Careful

lobita

By lobita
in Coping with Celiac Disease

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lobita Apprentice
lobita
Posted

This is probably going to sound more like a rant than a question, but here goes.

My bf's sister is hosting a family dinner event this Sunday, which I'm invited to and expected to go to. The problem is that she's totally not sympathetic to my gluten intolerance. Her attitude is she's going to cook what she's going to cook and tough if I can't eat it. While it totally upsets me that she's like this, I really can't do anything about it.

I've realized that I'm going to have to eat before going. And I'm making my own cake to take so I at least can eat dessert. But I'm wondering whether the next time I'm going to have to just decline any invitations to her house? I'm worried that might start upsetting people and cause a wedge.

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The Fluffy Assassin Enthusiast
The Fluffy Assassin
Posted
I'm worried that might start upsetting people and cause a wedge.

Bring your own food and smile a lot. You aren't the one creating a wedge; she is. Don't worry about it. Some people are ignorant; some people are stupid. You can't change them. Just do what you have to do to be healthy, keep as much of a sense of humor about it as you can, and enjoy yourself as much as you can. (In the longer run, you can invite her over and cook for her and demonstrate that gluten-free cooking isn't weird or freaky and can be as tasty as anything else.)

GlutenGalAZ Enthusiast
GlutenGalAZ
Posted

I would see if your BF can find out what his sister is making... Maybe you can bring a plat of similar food so what you are eating blends in with what everyone else is eating OR just bring whatever you want to eat.

Depending on how your BF's sister is with you maybe she is testing you or just pushing your buttons (depending on how you get along).

I would just act like it does't bother you. Maybe make a dessert or something fun (keep some to the side for yourself so it doesn't get CC) and share it with everyone.

I know the Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Cookie recipe on here is a big hit with my gluten eating family members.

Good Luck and hope all goes well.

MrsClaus Newbie
MrsClaus
Posted

The previous two have given you good advice. I eat before I go to places when I am not sure and I take food with me. Sometimes I make or buy a gluten-free desert just to show them it can be good!

ang1e0251 Contributor
ang1e0251
Posted

If you have a good attitude about it, everything will go well. Take your own food or eat before you go, whichever suits you best. Be light and fun, if you are having a good time, no one will notice anything is wrong. After all getting together is about enjoying each other not the food. I know, we do focus on food a lot in our society, but she can't use it as a weapon against you if you don't let her.

It's like the girl that reports her brother tortures her by eating food she can't have, then taunting her with it. If you behave to the sister that her slights don't bother you, she will lose interest in excluding you. Show her that no matter what she does, it won't affect your relationship with your BF.

lobita Apprentice
lobita
Posted
  • Author

Thanks for the replies you guys. It made me feel better.

JNBunnie1 Community Regular
JNBunnie1
Posted
Thanks for the replies you guys. It made me feel better.

If it helps at all, anyone who's that uninterested isn't going to make safe food for you even if they do make an 'effort', so you're better off on your own anyway. There are about two people I'll let cook for me, my boyfriend and my mom. And we all live together.

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