Thanksgiving Alone...first Mourning Experience

[jensey]

There are many reasons I will spend Thanksgiving alone at home.

FIRST: I work in a bakery and it is a BUSY week so I don't mind not having to deal with people. I have said this before, but in case you haven't read anything about me let me say " I know I work in a bakery and have celiac...working on changing that."

OK that's out of the way. Now for the story.

The grocery store I work for offers Thanksgiving dinner in the break room for all employees. I asked if I could prep my plate before others had access to it to avoid possible cross contamination, that was fine. So, I go to the back to prep my plate and I saw one cook use the thermometer to ensure temp on stuffing was right and then used the same thermometer to temp the sliced turkey I was going to put on my plate...AAARGH!

I totally understand that people not affected with celiac disease don't REALLY understand how important it is to not cross contaminate in ANY food in any way that may be consumed by a person with celiac, but I was SOOOOOOO bummed that I couldn't eat a Turkey dinner made anywhere other than my kitchen.

I decided last week not to go to anyone's house to have dinner because I didn't want to feel like I had to be so wary about what spices, or whatever were used. Nor did I want to have to watch people to ensure the utensil that was in stuffing didn't touch ANYTHING I might eat, it seemed to daunting. I accept that I cannot eat gluten and that I REALLY have to be THAT cautious but I can honestly say that I am on a little pity pot and feel like I am in a bit of mourning about it this year.

I know this will pass because when I was first diagnosed I was in total mourning had to mention it a lot, but now I try not to bring it up because I accept it is what it is. So whaaaaaaaaaaaaaa whaaaaaaaa whaaaaaaaaa this year. I just wanted to share that I feel like I lost something this year. I know it will get better!

Happy turkey day to all!

[Juliebove]

I remember our first Thanksgiving after daughter was diagnosed. We also have additional food allergies. Back then, I put broth in the potatoes instead of milk and olive oil instead of butter. They were not a big winner with the family. They did eat the gluten-free stuffing I made, but daughter didn't like it.

The next year I made wild rice instead of stuffing or potaotes. And guess what? My mom made stuffing and potatoes for the rest of the family. Aargh! So not only could we not eat the gravy but the other stuff as well. And nobody really ate the wild rice.

My family doesn't get the issues of cross contamination either. They actually laugh at us for thinking that way and make snide comments about it. They think a little couldn't possibly hurt. I have tried pointing out to them the pill theory. They all take prescription meds. I tell them to think of the smallest pill that they take. Then I tell them they might as well give one to my daughter. It's small, right? Couldn't hurt! Nope. They don't make the connection. They think meds and foods are two different things.

[ENF]

You are correct in not partaking if there is a risk of CC. You have a very good understanding of how to deal with such a situation.

I would love to spend Thanksgiving in Plymouth, where my Mayflower passenger ancestors landed, but it's out of the question due to Celiac, and eating dinner with the organization that I used to belong to would not be worth the risk.

There should be a sticky on this board to remind us all of the fact that non-celiacs, including people that have no problems with gluten (that they are aware of), do not understand this condition - just as people do not know what other disabilities are like, this is no different. It SEEMS like it would be a simple task for them to learn a little about it, but apparently it is going to take a very long time until there is significant progress. Until then, we've got to watch out for ourselves.

Happy Thanksgiving, all!

[pixiegirl]

I'm sorry that you have to forgo this holiday. After my daughter and I were diagnosed we started making the meal at our house. That way I know everything is gluten-free. Maybe you should try that next year.. if you don't have family nearby and are worried about eating by yourself... About a month prior to the holiday I start telling people that my turkey day dinner is open to people that have no place else to go. I ask my close friends, people from work, my daughter's friends... its shocking how many people will say yes!

I do all the cooking that way I know its gluten-free. I do a fairly simple, traditional meal and no one complains or misses bread stuffing (I use a rice stuffing) I make gluten-free corn bread too. People always ask, what can I bring..... I say wine, flowers, coffee beans, ice cream, etc. That way they all feel useful and I restock my wine cellar!

I hope every one has a nice holiday.

Susan

[Sweetea888]

This is my fifth Thanksgiving since I was diagnosed with Celiac Disease. They have gotten progressively better. I now know which turkeys are gluten free, how to make gluten free gravy, and even how to make a darn good dressing out of cornbread and gluten free bread. AND, for the first time, I am making myself a pie. (I haven't had pie in five years so I'm pretty excited.) It is hard to eat with other people who aren't gluten intolerant or who have celiac disease, but it works better if you are at your own house. That gives you control you can't have other places. Things will get better. It just takes time. Happy Thanksgiving!!!

There are many reasons I will spend Thanksgiving alone at home.

FIRST: I work in a bakery and it is a BUSY week so I don't mind not having to deal with people. I have said this before, but in case you haven't read anything about me let me say " I know I work in a bakery and have celiac...working on changing that."

OK that's out of the way. Now for the story.

The grocery store I work for offers Thanksgiving dinner in the break room for all employees. I asked if I could prep my plate before others had access to it to avoid possible cross contamination, that was fine. So, I go to the back to prep my plate and I saw one cook use the thermometer to ensure temp on stuffing was right and then used the same thermometer to temp the sliced turkey I was going to put on my plate...AAARGH!

I totally understand that people not affected with celiac disease don't REALLY understand how important it is to not cross contaminate in ANY food in any way that may be consumed by a person with celiac, but I was SOOOOOOO bummed that I couldn't eat a Turkey dinner made anywhere other than my kitchen.

I decided last week not to go to anyone's house to have dinner because I didn't want to feel like I had to be so wary about what spices, or whatever were used. Nor did I want to have to watch people to ensure the utensil that was in stuffing didn't touch ANYTHING I might eat, it seemed to daunting. I accept that I cannot eat gluten and that I REALLY have to be THAT cautious but I can honestly say that I am on a little pity pot and feel like I am in a bit of mourning about it this year.

I know this will pass because when I was first diagnosed I was in total mourning had to mention it a lot, but now I try not to bring it up because I accept it is what it is. So whaaaaaaaaaaaaaa whaaaaaaaa whaaaaaaaaa this year. I just wanted to share that I feel like I lost something this year. I know it will get better!

Happy turkey day to all!

[Jestgar]

Today I'm going to a friends house mid afternoon. She's got dips and appetizers, I'm bringing the crackers. After a few snacks we're going to the Mexican restaurant for Margaritas.

Who says Thanksgiving is about turkey and stuffing?

[mamaw]

I'm sorry you feel you have to spend Thanksgiving alone .. It will get better as your understanding of celiac grows.

Personally I would never stay home from visiting relatives or friends anytime. I always fix a plate of gluten-free & cart it with me. After all the interaction of loving friendships is what its all about, food is just part of the experience. So you may not have exactly the same as everyone else you still have gluten-free food to fuel your body & the friendship of loved ones... this way no one is stressed out & no one feels weird because I'm sitting there at the table with a full plate of gluten-free food. I always make a dessert that everyone can share. This has always been well accepted & enjoyed by all & it also opens up conversation about gluten-free.....

Plan ahead for events & prepare gluten-free food , freeze it & go enjoy your loved ones......

blessings

mamaw

[DingoGirl]

It's such a bummer in the beginning.....dealing w/ celiac at the holidays. The only proper way to do it, in my opinion, is to bring your own food!

This is my fourth g f Thanksgiving, always at my brother's with around 25 people...and I ALWAYS take my own food - it's the only way to do it! I eat their mashed potatoes, salad (I serve myself before it's dressed, bring my own dressing), green veggies w/ butter, cranberry sauce, but bring my own turkey, and stuffing and gravy, if I want it (too lazy to do it this year), and some roasted acorn squash for everyone.

so this year's meal is rather boring for me but it's not bad, I am thankful for many things, and thankful to have a place to go.

It gets better!

[brigala]

For reasons unrelated to Celiac I was unable to travel out of town to have Thanksgiving with my family this year. I sent the kids on the train to do Thanksgiving at my mom's house (one kid is gluten-free but that's OK because so is my mom and my sister so he was really looking forward to Grandma's Gluten Free Thanksgiving).

Anyway, when my step-daughter found out we were going to be in town this year, she invited us to go to a restaurant for Thanksgiving with her family. I told her that her dad would probably be happy to go, but I'd rather just stay home. Of course she took it personally, and wouldn't let up about it. I finally caved and said I would cook Thanksgiving dinner here and they could come over. And, no, she doesn't need to bring anything. She really really really doesn't get it (I have another thread around here somewhere about her getting bent out of shape after I told her she couldn't cook the glazed-with-wheat chicken breasts she brought over to my house in my iron skillet).

In any event, it DOES get easier. You might find, like I did, that once your extended family sees the change in your health they might start realizing that some of THEM have Celiac, too... and once you get 3 or 4 people in a family who are all doing things the same way, the rest of the people start to get it a little better. Or you will learn some other coping strategies, like the PP who would just bring her own food and share the company -- but not the food -- with the other people at the meal.

I ended up coming down with a nasty virus and step-daughter ended up going to a restaurant anyway (my thanksgiving food this year has consisted entirely of gatorade and applesauce, and not much of either). But I do find that Thanksgiving is one of those "If you want something done your way, do it yourself" things.

One interesting thing that I've found is that, while I absolutely adore my family's traditional bread stuffing, my kids never liked it. Ever. So last year when I decided, instead of trying to make it work with a gluten-free bread, I would use the exact same recipe only use a mix of brown and wild rice instead of bread, imagine my surprise when both my kids scarfed it down like it was the best thing since (pardon the idiom) sliced bread. And that was before my younger son swore of gluten for himself.

Other than the stuffing, there's nothing else about Thanksgiving that "has to" contain gluten as long as you're careful about your ingredient sources. Thanksgiving is a pretty gluten-free sort of meal. Desserts are probably the biggest challenge, but even a crustless pumpkin pie is not difficult to make if you don't want to do a specialty gluten-free crust.

-Elizabeth

[jenngolightly]

I stayed home the first year, too. It was such a bummer and I was very sad.

But now my sis hosts dinner and the only thing with gluten is desert. We just forgo stuffing (which for next year I'll have to learn to make with cornbread and gluten-free bread cubes) - all other food is exactly the same as any other year (except gluten-free) and the non-celiacs don't notice the change at all. Sis is still anxious about cooking, but she's getting used to it - and I bring 1/2 the meal anyway.

It takes time. And it's easier if you have a loving family who accepts your special eating needs. If sis wasn't around, I'd probably have to make my own plate and take it with me - which I hate to do because I don't like people making a fuss over me ("Why did you bring your own food?" "What's celiac?"). I'd do it, but luckily I have a sis who will accommodate me (but I still watch her like a hawk when she cooks).

Good luck next year.