I'll Admit It. I'm Afraid To Eat Out.

[frenchiemama]

My husband and I used to eat out quite often, it's something that we both really enjoy. But I'm just too scared to try it now. It seems silly, I'm a grown woman after all. My DH is just finally starting to get better, and I've been feeling so good lately. I swear, if the itch comes back I don't know if I can take it.

I just can't bring myself to put my recovery into the hands of a complete stranger. What if they don't understand? What if there is hidden gluten that they don't think of?

I WANT to be able to eat out, and I keep saying that we will go, but then I chicken out at the last minute.

How can I get over this? It's really bothering me.

[skbird]

I myself have had some bad experiences lately and am not jazzed on eating out but there are three places in town I trust - 2 sushi restaurants and one is the BBQ at my health food store - they see me coming and know what they can make me.

I think it takes baby steps. Maybe find one likely place you think you'd feel comfortable eating at or talking with the server/owner/etc and start from there. If you have consistent good luck and communication with them, then you might feel more comfortable looking for the next place.

I've been told by some people that they find they get contaminated more easily at friends houses than at restaurants. Honestly, I'm pretty chicken about eating at other people's houses, too. So I just bring something, in that situation.

It'll get better. Maybe you'll decide eating out doesn't matter much - I know that has happened for me! Eating at a restaurant used to be my favorite thing - now I love the food I prepare so much more. I also enjoy inviting people over and making food for them - it puts the situation more in my control. Then they see something like gluten-free mix or gluten-free soap (I have the kind that says it on the label of the bottle) and they ask about it, and I get to inform. It works out well - plus everyone ends up pretty happy and full.

Take care

Stephanie

[Guest Viola]

I agree, eating at restaurants are far safer than at peoples houses, I just spent three weeks away and didn't have any problem with the restaurants, but went through a lot of imodium at my parents place where we were for two weeks.

I think people at the restaurant are too afraid to make you sick. Make sure you send a card back to the kitchen and have the cook read it.

Just remember for those of you that haven't been out, someday you may need to travel somewhere, then you won't have any practice eating out and your trip will be very stressfull.

So find a restaurant you feel looks like a good place. Take your card in some afternoon when things are really quiet and personally go over the diet with the waitress and if possible the cook. I have several cards out, pinned in different restaurant kitchens so they can double check and know what to do if any other celiac comes in. I printed them off from my computer and took them around. Most are very interested and willing to learn if they have the time between meal hours. Then when you go in for your meal, they will already have an idea of what's going on.

Hope this helps some. Just remember, like everything else in a Celiac's life, it does take time and patience.

[cdford]

Some restaurants are easier than others. Take time to check out some of the posts and find a restaurant that is praised here and has a local unit where you are.

Take your card with you and do your best to be bold but not obnoxious. Keep it simple for that first try...Maybe a steak with no seasonings, a baked potato with butter, and some steamed veggies. I have had good success with this kind of meal at Outback, Longhorn, and Logan's Roadhouse. If you like seafood, I have also had good enough experiences at Red Lobster to contact their corporate offices and praise our local unit. Their tilapia, scampi, and crab legs can be made gluten-free easily.

Practice may make perfect here, but it also increases the risk. Take it one step at a time. If it occurs, be sure that any reaction you think you have is really from the food and not from the fear.

[frenchiemama]

Thanks everybody.

I've tried the chili at Wendy's, but I'm trying to avoid any sources of iodized salt right now so that's temporarily out.

Unfortunately we don't have any of the chains that everyone here seems to like so much. There isn't an Outback within 100 miles and I've never even heard of PF Changs.

*SIGH* I'll get up the guts someday. I think I'm still so traumatized by 2 years of nightmarish itching from DH that it's hard for me to go out on a limb at all.

[lovegrov]

I think you'd be better off and safer finding a locally owned restaurant with a real chef than you would with a chain, even a chain with a gluten-free menu. Talk to the owner or chef ahead of time and go when they're not real busy.

richard

[plantime]

At my local Wendie's, I order a burger with no bun. I then stand there and watch it prepared. They don't toast buns on the grill, and they always get out a new container. Since I am able to see it prepared, I feel safe with it. I don't eat the chili, someone might have tried to thin it with water, then added flour 'cause they got it too thin! But no, you are not weird for being afraid to eat out. Your health is your responsibility, you do what you have to do to remain healthy.

[Guest barbara3675]

You CANNOT hide in your house and not enjoy eating out. Look for restaurants that have a charcoal grill and order a steak or something else cooked on it. A baked potato is always safe and a salad with no croutons or bacon bits. Bring your own dressing and you have a complete dinner. I eat out all the time and am doing fine. There is a chain called Noodles in our area that has rice noodles cooked in dedicated water and then they stir cook veggies and chicken in olive oil....wonderful. The cook even comes out to talk to me occasionally. At Appleby's recently, I had the grilled salmon, fresh veggies and rice pilaf for lunch---the menu said there was a sauce on the salmon, I just said don't put any sauce or seasonings on my food. The manager came right to the table to talk with me and said he wanted to be sure my food was prepared properly as he has a son that has allergies too. The meal was delightful. I think when you speak up, you get what you want, sometimes better than what the other people at the table have. You need to get some courage, though, because this is your life now and you need to be in control. The world needs education about gluten issues and it isn't going to happen when people stay in their houses and don't say anything. Barbara

[bklyn]

I ask to speak to the manager whenever I eat out now. Too many times I've had waiters or waitresses not do the right thing. I tell the manager I have a food allergy and I give him my card to give to the cook. I feel much safer that way.

[UIDancer]

I had Steak and Shake last weekend for the first time since going gluten-free. It was awesome! They have quite a few gluten-free choices, according to their website. I was so happy I could finally have some of their awesome chili again!! And I even had a hot fudge sundae.. yum!

Devon

Chicago, IL

[pixiegirl]

Keep in mind that many rice pilaf's contain orzo which is a pasta shaped like rice, and they all have seasonings I'd be afraid of. I eat plain white rice and I ask if its cooked in chicken broth or water. If its cooked in chicken broth I have the baked potato.

susan

[ianm]

I have to travel for work frequently and have rarely had a problem. Once you get more confortable with the lifestyle it becomes easier and eating out isn't as big of a deal as it seems right now. Don't be afraid to ask the waitstaff about the food. They are usually willing to help.

[kabowman]

I recently went to Chili's (I have called and have talked to the manager and cooks so I know I can eat there) and had the BEST resturaunt experience to-date.

Our waiter recognized me, reminded me he is also a cook there, took my order, and when he brought it out a while later (all with instructions on HOW to cook my food and on WHAT, etc), he explained that it took a little longer because he COOKED MY FOOD HIMSELF because the cook back there was a little concerned about cooking for me!!!

Talk about a big tip!!!!!

[skbird]

I don't mean to be a downer, but I have been diligent about letting the waiter/manager/whomever know what's going on and still get glutened almost every time I go out. I have been diligent about my food being prepared in restaurants for 6 years now, since I found out about my first food intolerances, so I'm not shy about it. I have gotten glutened the last two times in restaurants from stuff that really had next to no chance of having gluten in them. In fact, the last time was waited on by someone who was familar with gluten intolerance to boot.

I'm actually pretty frustrated with eating out at this point. Like I mentioned above, I have 3 restaurants in town that I feel comfortable with and that's about it for now. Maybe it's because I already have more eating limitations that many others on this list that it's nearly impossible for me to find food I can eat.

I'm a really optimistic person so it's hard for me to post this message but I'm just really over being sick after eating out, especially when my own homemade food is so good!

Sigh. Anyway, needed to vent about that.

Stephanie

[frenchiemama]

Well, I did it! And I'm not dead or sick or itchy!

I went to lunch with my little brother who has just returned from college. We went to a little family owned h'mong restuarant.

I brought a restaurant card with me, and asked the daughter (the mom who owns the place and cooks doesn't speak any english) to help me pick something out.

My food took about 3 times longer than my brothers, but I know that means that she was being really careful. It was delicious, and the waitress (daughter of the owner/cook) told me exactly what to order next time I come in.

It's been almost 2 hours and I still feel fine. Yay me!

[skbird]

Congratulations! That is awesome!

Stephanie

[frenchiemama]

Thanks Stephanie. It feels weird to be so excited about eating lunch out. I'm sorry that you have had so many troubles yourself, that is exactly what I'm afraid of. But I feel better now that I know at least one place I can walk into and order a meal without worry.

[Guest nini]

for the first year after my dx I was terrified to eat out and I would avoid it at all cost because my worst experiences prior to dx were in restaurants. I started with a mexican restaurant as my first dining exp. out. I took in a card in both english and spanish, verified that the chips and salsa were safe (all homemade fresh there and they could tell me EVERYTHING in them) and a taco... it was a pretty simple meal, but I was thrilled to be out of the house and not cooking. And not getting sick! My next dining out exp. was at Outback for my birthday. I was treated like royalty by the manager and entire waitstaff, they told me that the Manager's wife has celiac and they have an average of 2 gluten free diners a night, so I felt really comfortable ordering off of the gluten-free menu, they even brought me a delish gluten-free desert for my birthday! I'm getting less and less afraid to dine out now, we just took a trip to Florida for a week and even though I packed a cooler and several grocery bags full of gluten-free stuff, It was still nice to go out to eat with friends and family.

[skbird]

frenchiemama - I really kind of didn't want to post my experiences because they have not been that encouraging. And I really don't want to scare anyone. But I guess my desire to see if anyone else reacts to miniscule amounts of gluten, as I seem to, reflects anyone else's experience. Would make me feel a little better, I guess.

It could be that there is something else I"m reacting to and that is why I'm having such a hard time with it. At least I've identified a few places I can eat and not have trouble. I was really depressed when I went to Outback and had the perfect looking gluten free meal and ended up getting sick from the veggie wash (as it has citric acid in it - not gluten).

Anyway, please don't get discouraged from my posts on this subject. It's very important to raise awareness on eating gluten free.

Take care

Stephanie

[cdford]

Hurray for you! It was a big step to get out to eat, but you did it. It sounds as though they were diligent, so maybe you will do well. One step at a time and you will figure out where you can and cannot go.