Newly Diagnosed- Dealing With Rude Comments

[IrishHeart]

  Irish Heart is right, its on you to educate and cite reputable sources. 

 

 

  I used to think that people that were allergic to gluten were just being overly picky eaters.  I had no idea that all it takes is 1/8 of a teaspoon to chemically create a reaction in ones body.)  

 

 

 

I had you at "Irish Heart is right"   can you tell this to my hubs, my Mom, my sister, my ex husband,etc..?.

 

but seriously, sweet girl, I cannot endorse

EVER saying to anyone:

 

" I used to think the "allergic to gluten people were just being overly picky eaters"

 

because nothing in that statement is true. 

 

Celiacs are not "allergic to gluten" (celiac is NOT an allergy so, I would never say that)

 

and I am not " overly picky" 

 

so I would not ever counter an argument using that rationale.

 

Sorry, just clarifying, but  I do love your spirit! 

 

I just say this" Gluten is poison to me and  I do not eat it". Period.

[eers03]

Okay, so....   Probably a good point...  Addendum approved!

[powerofpositivethinking]

this is great!  I'm going to work on memorizing it 

First, that really has to hurt.  No wants to feel like the person that takes a pass on the family casserole.  Irish Heart is right, its on you to educate and cite reputable sources.  I'm in sales and my thing is this...  State someone's objections before they can.

 

So...

 

Them (Eyeroll)

 

You (I know, right?!  Its crazy!  I used to think that people that were allergic to gluten were just being overly picky eaters.  I had no idea that all it takes is 1/8 of a teaspoon to chemically create a reaction in ones body.)  

 

Them: WHAT?!

 

You: Yeah, its insane.  Did you know that if I cheat on my diet and eat one meal containing gluten per month that my mortality rate increases over time by 600%?  Thats why I never cheat!!!

 

Them: Whoa!  

 

You: Yep, its true.  If I can't check out the ingredients on a recipe, I have to stay out of it.  I CAN eat ALL kinds of stuff though.  Fresh fruit, steak, pork, chicken, but I stay out of the processed meats.  I still have my dairy. (hopefully)  Nuts, etc...

 

Them: Oh....  So what happens if you eat it?  

 

You:  C'mon, now.  Nobody wants to talk about that...  Alright look, my body fights gluten just like it fights the flu or any other foreign invader.  Now imagine that your body has to react like it has the flu every time you eat a meal.  Your body gets into an "inflamed" state over time that can lead to other diseases or even cancer.  Every time I eat the stuff, the battlefield of inflammation becomes my GI tract, my liver, and my intestines and over time it inhibits my ability to get what I need out of food.  So trust me, its not a fad diet for me. 

 

You:  It was tough at first but I know my resources now and to be honest, I'm a nutritional expert.  If you ever have questions about anything, I can probably point you in the right direction.  

 

 

That's how I play it off sometimes.  If you've already had your own version of this dialog and those same people are giving you "the look" they need to "look" at themselves and ask why they are so selfish.  

 

 

I had you at "Irish Heart is right"   can you tell this to my hubs, my Mom, my sister, my ex husband,etc..?.

 

but seriously, sweet girl, I cannot endorse

EVER saying to anyone:

 

" I used to think the "allergic to gluten people were just being overly picky eaters"

 

because nothing in that statement is true. 

 

Celiacs are not "allergic to gluten" (celiac is NOT an allergy so, I would never say that)

 

and I am not " overly picky" 

 

so I would not ever counter an argument using that rationale.

 

Sorry, just clarifying, but  I do love your spirit! 

 

I just say this" Gluten is poison to me and  I do not eat it". Period.

[IrishHeart]

Okay, so....   Probably a good point...  Addendum approved!

 

 

 

I think we all have our ways of expressing ourselves...do whatever works for you! 

I suggest you be firm, use humor to deflate anger and frustration and learn to blow off criticism about celiac and the gluten-free diet.

 

It's your life you are saving.

Just my two cents, IMHO.

[surviormom]

Well my father, responded as expected.  My sister however, is listening.  She plans to discuss with her doctor.  We know how her doctor will probably treat it, but at least she knows now, and perhaps will read about it.  My father would rather die than change his eating habits.   This is a man who has pancreatitis, liver disease, heart disease, odd rashes that pop up now and then, allergic to aspirin, and goes to the bathroom 3-4 times a day.  All of my life he has had 1 of those, half of my life he has had 3 of those, and the past 20 years 4 of them and the past 2 years all of them.  He is 69.  I left off that awful cough he wakes up with every day, another all of my life thing.

 

If they did to him what they just did to me I wonder what they would find?

[IrishHeart]

.  My father would rather die than change his eating habits.   

 

This is, sadly,  the most ironic statement of all...and it applies to many people I know as well.

 

They may very well die too early, if indeed celiac is the root of their health problems and they do not change their eating habits..

[surviormom]

This is, sadly,  the most ironic statement of all...and it applies to many people I know as well.

 

They may very well die too early, if indeed celiac is the root of their health problems and they do not change their eating habits..

Yep.  I tried.  

 

So there is rudeness everywhere.  Strangers, Friends, and Family.  Serenity, Courage, Wisdom.  I cannot change his health or attitude, I can change mine.

[IrishHeart]

Yep.  I tried.  

 

So there is rudeness everywhere.  Strangers, Friends, and Family.  Serenity, Courage, Wisdom.  I cannot change his health or attitude, I can change mine.

 

Sorry, hon..  I do know how hard it is to watch someone you love ignore what we see so plainly.

But ....take care of you and be an example of what good health looks like. 

[w8in4dave]

Wow, great idea. A non-processed food diet is ideal, right? Very healthy and great for weight management. I guess that's what I do automatically if I don't have the energy to explain Celiac disease, ha. Also, eblue, tell your family that Celiacs and people with food allergies are officially considered disabled by the government under the Americans with Disabilities Act. That should shake them up. :-D

Yup I ran into a friend of mine and she asked "why can't you go out to eat? What diet are you on? Don't tell me no carb diet either" I told her it is an all natural diet! It is "no" anything pre packaged she said " it's at a restaurant it is not pre packaged" I say " When restaurants cook alot of their stuff is pre packaged, I cannot eat it!" "So if I go with you to go out to eat I cannot eat." 

I feel she should respect my wishes, don't bug me about going out to eat! I don't want to go. Find someone eles to go with you!! 

I actually wish she would change her diet because she has crones <-- spelling  She eats horrible!! I wish she would think of her health a lil better. Dr. tells her not to eat lettuce, she runs hime and eats a bowl of salad. Too bad!! 

[Salax]

My sister-in-law said to me multiple times "I'd rather die than eat like you." (which I am gluten, corn and dairy (cow's milk) free). So I said, well thats pretty much what would happen if you did eat gluten with celiac...alot faster and a hell of alot more painful. Me, personally, food isn't a want/craving/desire. It's fuel, if you put bad fuel in your car it doesn't perform well. Same as your body, you put crap it, crap you get for performance, health issues, etc. She looked at me blinked and kept eating her gluteny cake, never said that to me again in the past 3 years. Hey, at least I got her to stop saying it to me.

 

People have a very large obession and I call it an addiction to food. Food has become a social thing, when really it shouldn't be...it's for nutrition and health, not events and parties. So it's hard to get people to break away from that stigma of needing to eat certain things or eating what everyone else eats, being accepted at parties, not making waves about food, etc. Me, I am at a point my health is far more important than someones feelings. I would never be nasty, but damn it I am not going to eat something to make you feel better. If thats the case that your feelings get hurt because someone didn't eat your food, you got your own (emotional) issues to deal with.

 

(You-as a generalized term)

 

Anyways, to the original poster. I does get better, just stand up for yourself and be kind but firm. Give it time.

[w8in4dave]

My sister-in-law said to me multiple times "I'd rather die than eat like you." (which I am gluten, corn and dairy (cow's milk) free). So I said, well thats pretty much what would happen if you did eat gluten with celiac...alot faster and a hell of alot more painful. Me, personally, food isn't a want/craving/desire. It's fuel, if you put bad fuel in your car it doesn't perform well. Same as your body, you put crap it, crap you get for performance, health issues, etc. She looked at me blinked and kept eating her gluteny cake, never said that to me again in the past 3 years. Hey, at least I got her to stop saying it to me.

 

People have a very large obession and I call it an addiction to food. Food has become a social thing, when really it shouldn't be...it's for nutrition and health, not events and parties. So it's hard to get people to break away from that stigma of needing to eat certain things or eating what everyone else eats, being accepted at parties, not making waves about food, etc. Me, I am at a point my health is far more important than someones feelings. I would never be nasty, but damn it I am not going to eat something to make you feel better. If thats the case that your feelings get hurt because someone didn't eat your food, you got your own (emotional) issues to deal with.

 

(You-as a generalized term)

 

Anyways, to the original poster. I does get better, just stand up for yourself and be kind but firm. Give it time.

Love your way of thinking!! TY  

[powerofpositivethinking]

this is a great thought!  I am working on getting my food in check.  yes, I need to eat at regular intervals, and I need to put good fuel in my body, but I hate it when it makes people uncomfortable if I don't want to eat.  Listen, I'm not going to starve.  As long as I have water, I'll make it for awhile.

 

I tend to be an over-sharer at times    i've been telling people if they offer me something that I can't eat gluten, and if they ask why, I don't say I have celiac even though I believe I do, but because I didn't get the gold standard diagnosis through biopsy, I still feel like I'm lying    Instead I say, I had a positive specific celiac blood test and am no longer suppose to be eating gluten, and I try to leave it at that.  If they really want to dive in further and ask what it does, I politely say it stops me up inside  , makes my joints hurt, brain fog, etc.  hey they're the ones that asked 

 

anyway I understand that food is a symbol of love, but show me you love me when I refuse your food, albeit in a polite manner, because I know it will not make me feel good 

 

 

People have a very large obession and I call it an addiction to food. Food has become a social thing, when really it shouldn't be...it's for nutrition and health, not events and parties. So it's hard to get people to break away from that stigma of needing to eat certain things or eating what everyone else eats, being accepted at parties, not making waves about food, etc. Me, I am at a point my health is far more important than someones feelings. I would never be nasty, but damn it I am not going to eat something to make you feel better. If thats the case that your feelings get hurt because someone didn't eat your food, you got your own (emotional) issues to deal with.

 

 

[w8in4dave]

Actually I am finding it is easier and easier to say "No Thank You" I don't have to explain myself , I don't have to lecture, I just say "No Thank You" and that is that!! Even if they say "Are you sure? It's really good!" I say "No thank you, I am good!" "Thanks anyway" smile and continue on No worries I am happy!!