The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

[ranger]

Suzie

I would have been scared to DEATH! Wudda locked the doors and windows, crouched in the corner, in the dark, and called 911. Wow. Gutsy lady!

COS. Do you like to be called Suzie? All my life, I would want to smack people if they called me Suzie, And my grandaughter, also a Susan, is the same way. Just curious.

I have lost my silli. Help!

[Jestgar]

I have lost my silli. Help!

whelp, Celiac is known to cause flattened silli, but it usually comes back. Have you tried running through the neighbourhood screeming 'call 911'?

[ranger]

no, but I am crouched in the corner.

[nikki-uk]

. Do you like to be called Suzie? All my life, I would want to smack people if they called me Suzie, And my grandaughter, also a Susan, is the same way. Just curious.

She LOVES to be called Sue

[mushroom]

I once knew a boy named Sue He did not run thru the neighborhood calling "dial 911"

[DingoGirl]

Most decidedly ASKEEEEEEEERT at that idea!!!

...scared ...hold me!!!

_{<where's me bullet proof vest???>}

GADS!...i know it's your right (to bare arms) an' all but it maketh me verrrry nervous....guns are just ILLEGAL here and NOT a familiar sight at all

OMG - soooooooooo many guns in Clovis Lots of cowboys, and faux cowboys, and very paranoid right-wing borderline militant types....um, my stepfather has a concealed weapon on his person AT ALL TIMES - my mom was upset that I didn't call him at 10 pm - he'd have been right over (I DID think about it but.....got through - really wanted to call my MOMMY! but didn't want to worry her and cause HER a sleepless night)

I would not at all mind a small, lady's hand pistol near me bed But never felt the need until last night.....

had the Skull Cracker under me bed, and all doors and windows closed and locked, for the first time in my life

and if any of youse think Weez would be of ANY help at all with an intruder, well, think again...she was canoodling w/ the cops and they said - "oh wow - she looks like a real protector"

the laundry discussions between Nik and Shroom x 25

_{just get a dryer, for Pete's sake} the secret is - line-dry for MOST of the drying, then fluff in the dryer....works quite well and saves on one's bill.

_{Has Soozle calmed down, yet????}

_{Is it safe to come out?????}

Whew!!!!! Note to self: Never get on Soozie's bad side!

Soozie with a gun is just plain scairy .....Ixnay on the ungay, Suze

*snooort* Soozle has come out, but is going back to bed. Was up most of the night.

Um - me with a gun is quite safe, and I would be EVERYONE's protector. Just don't break into my house or harm my property, peeps, animals, or anyone else close by. I WILL NOT TOLERATE THIS.

Just a bit sad I didn't get to give him the "now why on EARTH would you behave this way?? There is a DIFFERENT and BETTER way of life, let's talk about it" lecture. (am serious about this, have done it)

Miscreants abound everywhere. Recently, hubby and I were taking a walk around the neighborhood. A couple of the pubescent type were keeping stride with us from across the street and started throwing rocks at Brian. He went after them with, "You want a piece of me?....Come on!!....I'm ready!!!"

dear gawd. I LOVE Brian for his reaction. but shame on those ne'er-do-wells. :BAH:

What a story to wake up to! The little punk! Bet he's sorry he ever messed with you--but how scary! Did you manage to get any sleep last night?

not much, Padt. Going to try and catch a phew winks now.

the Ba$tard has dented my garage. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

I wonder if my neighbors think I'm crazy. I guarantee you, nearly all of hte men around here would have done the same thing - chased the miscreant.

Aww man...Susie has all the fun

The most exciting thing I did yesterday was buy chicken food

<snackle>

Wow Suze!!! Hope you don't see the punk again . . . how long until the cops let you have his bike? . . . and kids harassing Brian?? what is with people????

Jan-it - I don't want the bike. Even if it was a really good one......I told them cops, I don't want them ill-gotten gains. But, I do have a flip-flop, and will nail it onto my garage wall.

COS. Do you like to be called Suzie? All my life, I would want to smack people if they called me Suzie, And my grandaughter, also a Susan, is the same way. Just curious.

I introduce myself to strangers as Susan, but friends never call me that for long. am called Susie, Soozle, Spruesie (for celiac sprue, ya know), Schmooz, Pseussly, all kinds of things! but NEVER Sue - HATE IT!!!!!!!!!!

so - we call you Sue-zen? We can happily do that.....but don't ever expect us to spell it the same way twice <snackle>

whelp, Celiac is known to cause flattened silli, but it usually comes back. Have you tried running through the neighbourhood screeming 'call 911'?

*snooooooooort* x 50

She LOVES to be called Sue

gahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I once knew a boy named Sue He did not run thru the neighborhood calling "dial 911"

but are you quite sure?

[elye]

J3 is home!!

Dear gawd..... . . ..gone for two weeks, and he had TWO showers.

Was in the lake every day, but still... . . ......

Shopping for chicken food??? . . . sounds like fun to me . . . I'm shopping for paint.

Paint would be funner than what I am leaving to shop for: more sunscreen, as J3 used up two bottles whilst away. Crap, he wasn't showering..... . . the same layer of sunscreen should have lasted five or six days, methinks.... . . . . . ..

Jyess's flattened silli!!

Soooozle wif a gun. . . . . . .. . . ..sounds like something you've wanted all yer life, Soooze! Here I hankered for Mod-Hair Ken, Lite Brite, Cougar boots and the latest Supertramp album.... . . . .Our Soooze had the Smith & Wessons circled in the catalogues.. .. . ....

[nikki-uk]

I once knew a boy named Sue He did not run thru the neighborhood calling "dial 911"

A boy named Sue???

Did he line dry or tumble dry???

[ranger]

OK Silli starting to elongate.

I live in a schizoid nieborhood.....I'm in the middle of a block-long street. To the right are nice, well kept homes with big yards, and to the left are almost slum homes. Last year, late at night, I heard yelling and screaming from the slum side. A guy was yelling "call 911" It sounde like someone had hit someone, from the yells I heard. Then, a car pulled into my yard and, whoever was in it jumped out, left the door open, and took off. At this point I crouched in the corner, in the dark, and called 911. I told the police that these were nasty people and I needed to remain anonymous. They came and put a guy in the back of thier car. I heard him yell out " Who called the cops", and over the loud dispach radio, I heard my name -not once- but twice. I was so angry! The guy went to jail for DV, and got out not too long after. But I was scared to death to live here for a long time. Thank God they moved out. A lesson in life ------ look both ways before buying!

Now , on to a lighter note. Yes, I like the Sue-Zen. May see about legally changing it to that. But, more importantly I LOVE the avators. Its too hot to go looking through parking garages today. 90+ and humid. Same thing tomorro. I hope SHM will wait for my sour mood to pass. Anybody got a dumb joke?

The misspelling will be easy for me. I do it naturally.

[Jestgar]

Anybody got a dumb joke?

Multiple Choice: Which of the following is the most different?

A ) A Ph.D. in Mathematical Biology

B ) A Ph.D. in Theoretical Mathematics

C ) A Ph.D. in Statistics

D ) A large pepperoni pizza

Answer: B - the other three can all feed a family of four.

[Jestgar]

After sitting through the twenty-third example about playing cards in his probability class, the student raised his hand to complain: "Professor, all this talk makes me feel like I

[Jestgar]

Statisticians do it continuously but discretely.

Statisticians do it when it counts.

Statisticians do it with 95% confidence.

Statisticians do it with large numbers.

Statisticians do it with only a 5% chance of being rejected.

Statisticians do it with two-tail T tests.

Statisticians do it. After all, it's only normal.

Statisticians probably do it.

Statisticians do it with significance.

Probabilists do it on random walks.

Probabilists do it stochastically.

Statisticians do all the standard deviations.

[elye]

OK Silli starting to elongate.

OMG, Sewzan. . . ........um, we're, like, funny and a bit lewd around here at times, but... . . ....well, that is just Far Too Much Information. .........

I live in a schizoid nieborhood.....

Holy crap, Sewzun! I've just got funny ol' Mr. Chow behind me, doin' his Tai chi at 6 am every single morning....and the man across from us, who puts out forty-two enormous blow-up Christmas figures and a HUGE, life-sized creche and figures on his front lawn at the end of November.....one cannot see his house......and the LIGHTS! Yep, never a dull moment. . .. ....... .

Multiple Choice:

Answer: B - the other three can all feed a family of four.

Phunny, AND true!

[Jestgar]

....and the man across from us, who puts out forty-two enormous blow-up Christmas figures and a HUGE, life-sized creche and figures on his front lawn at the end of November.....one cannot see his house......and the LIGHTS! Yep, never a dull moment. . .. ....... .

wow. 42 blow jo....well, never mind...

[mushroom]

There are liars, damned liars, and statisticians

[ranger]

Sorry if I offended you.. I was referring to the fact that as celiac flattens the villa, there are some illness that elongate them, and that I was coming (growing) out of my bad mood. I can be lewd, but this time it was an accident.

sorry, Sleezan

And I'd like to see a pic of 42 blow-ups in a yard. We've got a big yard, but I can't imagine fitting them in it!

And Jestgar, are you by any chance a statistician?

[mushroom]

Sheesh, we is going to have to something about this SleezOne; first she was elongating and now she is coming.... :lol:

[Darn210]

Sorry if I offended you..

She was yank'n yer chain Soozan . . . you've got to try a lot harder than that to offend US!!! . . . go ahead, try.

I can be lewd

You'll fit right in . . . we're quite juvenile

[elye]

There are liars, damned liars, and statisticians

Just LOVE saying this word. . . .......staaaaa-tis-TISH-uns..........

Must go say it in front of the mirror.. . . ...

Sorry if I offended you.. I was referring to the fact that as celiac flattens the villa, there are some illness that elongate them, and that I was coming (growing) out of my bad mood. I can be lewd, but this time it was an accident.

Sewzin! I was kidding, kidding!! Please don't EVER, and I do mean EVER, worry about offending anybody around here. I do believe it is impossible.... . .. ...

Hell, I make penis earrings out of sculpey. The potential, right there, to be offended is pretty high, but nope. 'Round here, it's like you're reporting the weather..... . .

Sheesh, we is going to have to something about this SleezOne; first she was elongating and now she is coming....

Yeah. I want want what she's having.

[Jestgar]

You'll fit right in . . . we're quite juvenile

Case in point:

Sheesh, we is going to have to something about this SleezOne; first she was elongating and now she is coming.... :lol:

And Jestgar, are you by any chance a statistician?

I'm actually a molecular biologist, but considering changing careers. Or at least preparing myself should I ever have the urge.

[DingoGirl]

OMG

Sillize uppin' the wackl on a Sunday aft :lol:

espeshully Sewzun, wif her coming and elongating :lol:

never WOZ able to take a nap today, Sillz. Need some chocolate, and need someone to bring it to me RIGHT THIS SECOND.

and I don't see it happenin.

[tom]

A boy named Sue???

Did he line dry or tumble dry???

He hung a man in Reno just to watch him dry.

<snicker>

[Darn210]

He hung a man in Reno just to watch him dry.

<snicker>

HiYa ToeMass!!!

[curlyfries]

Need some chocolate, and need someone to bring it to me RIGHT THIS SECOND.

OOPS!!!!

_{Sorry Sooz}

Ummm.......was that chocolate supposed to be for you?

Well..........you see..............I was, like, a little stressed.......and....like.........it was just sitting there........and, well...........I was kinda hungry too.....so..........the thing of it is..........

......you know you should never leave sumthin like that just sittin out.........

.....of course, if I hadn't eaten it, somebody else would've...

......it was gonna melt, anyway.........

.......it really wasn't all that good.....

_*snicker*

[mushroom]

He hung a man in Reno just to watch him dry.

<snicker>

Are you absolutely sure he hung him and didn't hang him??