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The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original


TriticusToxicum

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elye Community Regular

Ok Psills - full report in the morning!!!...... wish me luckkkkkkkkk!!!!!!!!! :o:unsure:;)

Have a great time, Gnick.. . .watch the wodka.. . . . sounds like they may be toasting every time someone coughs........ . . . ...:unsure:. . . .... . .

You can discuss their Olympic hopefuls, of which there are MANY. Ah, those Russians - - they are winter wunderkinds, methinks.. . . . ..


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Darn210 Enthusiast

Just wondering what is typical Ukrainian phood for me partay later?? .....met me Russian laydee in the gym - she

''has party for birthday - you come - drink lots wodka, eat phood. It's good, we dance''

<said in Russian accent>

Holy Smores Nikki!!!! Susan/Ranger/Slutvana belongs to your gym!!!!!! We haven't seen her in ages!!!! Tell her hello for me and hopefully she gets a new computer fer her birfday!!

Susie . . . congrats about the new gluten-free job at the dog park *giggle* . . . more details please or that's what we are going to call it!!

Did nae watch the opening ceremonies . . . we had in-laws over. Twas a nice visit.

I have wrenched me kneck . . . or summat . . . it has been out of sorts and is worse when I'm sitting on the computer. Cleaning for the in-laws on Friday really did me in and I sat around wif a heating pad and advil yesterday. Much better today but it's starting to hurt in the amount of time it took me to catch up on the thread so I won't be here long.

Skeeter update . . . *sigh* . . . well, Fri night I was looking at her and wondered "is that a rash on her face or what . . . must check closer after the in-laws leave". Then sent her off to bed and forgot all about it. When she got up yesterday, once again forgot to check and started her medication routine (she's on omeprazole and reglan). I noticed the rash again and took a closer look. It was mostly on one side . . . maybe I always look at her from the right and that's why I didn't notice in the morning or maybe the medication kicked it in high gear, but a rash it was. I called the GI doc on call expecting to get stuck in the messaging service and waiting a long time for a call back and an annoyed doctor for being bothered by something as simple as a rash. However, I mentioned the word Reglan and the screener put me on hold, told me not to hang up and they pulled a doctor off of rounds to talk to me . . . this scared me more than anything. (By the way, Reglan is a short term med . . . does wonderful things when it works . . . does horrific things when things go wrong). So the doc did questioned me about "new" things eaten or contacted and then did exactly what I was planning on doing . . . no more Reglan and start taking benedryl and watch for further problems (anaphalactic in nature) and get thee to an ER if something happens. So the benedry is working, she picked up a few more spots but have lost a couple and they all aren't as red . . . and not as itchy. The doctor called back last night to check on her. Why do I feel like I just dodged something big? The doc did say that my description of the rash was not a typical reaction. :huh: Anyways, I'm taking her to see the pediatrician tomorrow if they are open . . . I just need to get some answers. I also just have to throw in that although I think that this rash was caused by the Reglan, I have to mention that these pills have blue dye in them and that maybe this is all still dye issues.

Darn210 Enthusiast

WoW . . . :unsure: . . . did I bring this thread to its knees or what???

How's this . . .

A 6-year-old and a 4-year-old are upstairs in their bedroom. "You know what?" says the 6-year-old. "I think it's about time we start cussing." The 4-year-old nods his head in approval. The 6-year-old continues. "When we go downstairs for breakfast I'm going to say hell and you say ass."

"OK!" The 4 year old agrees with enthusiasm.

Their mother walks into the kitchen and asks the 6-year-old what he wants for breakfast. "Aw hell, Mom, I guess I'll have some Cheerios."

WHACK! He flies out of his chair, tumbles across the kitchen floor, gets up, and runs upstairs crying his eyes out, with his mother in hot pursuit, slapping his rear every step. The mom locks him in his room and shouts "You can just stay there till I let you out!"

She then comes back downstairs, looks at the 4-year-old, and asks with a stern voice, "And what do YOU want for breakfast young man?

"I don't know," he blubbers, "But you can bet your ass it won't be Cheerios!"

Darn210 Enthusiast

Or this . . .

So there's these 2 muffins in an oven.

They're both sitting, just chilling and getting baked.

And one of them yells "Dang, it's hot in here!"

And the other muffin replies "Holy Crap, a talking muffin!"

Darn210 Enthusiast

Did Bev tell anyone else this story about the last time she got pulled over? . . .

Bev: Is there a problem, Officer?

Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.

Bev: Oh, I see.

Officer: Can I see your license please?

Bev: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.

Officer: Don't have one?

Bev: Lost it 4 times for drunk driving.

Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.

Bev: I can't do that.

Officer: Why not?

Bev: I stole this car.

Officer: Stole it?

Bev: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.

Officer: You what?

Bev: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want

to see.

The Officer looks at Bev, slowly backs away to his car, and

calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior

officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please!

Bev steps out of her vehicle.

Bev: Is there a problem sir?

Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this

car and murdered the owner.

Bev: Murdered the owner?

Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car,

please.

Bev opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.

Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?

Bev: Yes, here are the registration papers.

The first officer is stunned.

Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving

license.

Bev digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and

hands it to the officer. The officer snaps open the clutch purse and

examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.

Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't

have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked

up the owner.

Bev: Betcha the lying bastard told you I was speeding too.

jerseyangel Proficient

:lol: Yer all alone Jan-it! But pseriously, it looks like you may just have dodged a big one with Skeeter. Could have been an allergic reaction starting up that her system was just trying to fight off. I don't have any experience with Reglan, but it must have quite the rep from the way the doctor responded. wow.

Hopefully you can get her in tomorrow--I still think you are on to something with the dye. I'll keep a good thought that you all can put the pieces of this thing together. :) Let us know.

We're at Starbucks in Houston (city). Beautiful day--almost 70 and sunny. People are out in shirtsleeves B)

Darn210 Enthusiast

Hopefully you can get her in tomorrow--I still think you are on to something with the dye. I'll keep a good thought that you all can put the pieces of this thing together. :) Let us know.

I'm soooo confused, I just don't know . . . I think there is an allergy in play. Not sure what to and not sure if that's the only thing going on.

Hubby made the kids go outside for a while . . . they've been glued to the computer . . . now I have a chance to "play" (while doing laundry <_< )


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Jestgar Rising Star

Oh fine. If Janet's doing laundry, I guess I could throw a load in as well.

elye Community Regular

"I don't know," he blubbers, "But you can bet your ass it won't be Cheerios!"

And the other muffin replies "Holy Crap, a talking muffin!"

Bev: Betcha the lying bastard told you I was speeding too.

:lol: :lol: Well done whilst manning the fort, Jyaghnutt!

Oh fine. If Janet's doing laundry, I guess I could throw a load in as well.

Yah...... me, too.. . . .. . . ..maybe I'll find me silly in the washer . .. .. ...

Darn210 Enthusiast

Oh fine. If Janet's doing laundry, I guess I could throw a load in as well.

Just think, with the money you save from not having to buy underwear or socks, you can buy yerself some fixin's for chocolate martinis

Yah...... me, too.. . . .. . . ..maybe I'll find me silly in the washer . .. .. ...

Check the lint trap . . . also the kids' pants pockets (that's where I find the most interesting things).

psawyer Proficient

Well, the laundry is done (not by me), the bread will be done in about 15 minutes, and the dishwasher is ready to unload.

jerseyangel Proficient

:P Got in a few minutes ago and threw the load of towels I washed this morning in the dryer.

Psyllie laundry :lol:

mushroom Proficient

:P Got in a few minutes ago and threw the load of towels I washed this morning in the dryer.

Psyllie laundry :lol:

Getting ready :P to throw the load I did yesterday in the dryer. Gnick would be out hanging them on the line, come rain or shine :lol:

Wonder how she is feeling after all the wodka?? :( We didn't get any chirpy good morning peeps from her :unsure:

jerseyangel Proficient

Wonder how she is feeling after all the wodka?? :( We didn't get any chirpy good morning peeps from her :unsure:

That's right--come to think of it, we haven't heard from her today.

curlyfries Contributor

Sorry I wasn't on earlier.......was doin me laundry.( No psilly to be found)

Is that how everyone spent Valentine's Day? :huh:

Love yer stand-up, Jan-knut! You should take it on the road ;)

HEY KNICKERS!!!!!

oops :unsure:

How was the partay?

jerseyangel Proficient

Leighsuagh!! Missed you :D

Hope yer sillie shows up soon ;)

curlyfries Contributor

Leighsuagh!! Missed you :D

Hope yer sillie shows up soon ;)

Tomorrow is a day off, and I'm going to spend my birfday money.....can't wait! :D

jerseyangel Proficient

Tomorrow is a day off, and I'm going to spend my birfday money.....can't wait! :D

Ooh!! That sounds like phun! Enjoy :D

DingoGirl Enthusiast

arrrrghhhhhh - QUOTE BUSTED!!!!!!!!!! :angry:

:unsure:

what in hell? why did Emmel not see my post? from Friday? did nae delete it.... Did Poeter see it? did everyone else? Am I on some sorta sanctions on accounta I have a "warn" status on my profile? <_<

Olympic opening ceremonies........not sure what I thought but they were DEFINITELY more organic and true to me than Beijing's......do ya think it had to do with the fact that Beijing spent (I believe I read) 30 to 40 MILLION on theirs, and Canada one-tenth of that? It had its charming moments.....

Love yer pic, Em :)

and keep forgetting to say how much I love Pads' Samatars *SNORTLE*

Have a by marriage relative from Russia. Food seems to be from Olive Garden or some other take-out.

:lol: that gave me an out-loud SNORT *cackle*

Yeah, I went to a Russian (Easter??) partay once. The food was overwhelming and impressive (and high in fat), but just as well we had so much food, because the wodka kept hopping out of the freezer for "toasts", bottoms up, drink the whole glass :unsure: Seemed like every half hour there was another "toast" to somefing or other, and then sometime much later *I* had to drive everyone home. I am not sure what my particular qualifications were 'cept I got everyone home safely and did NOT get pulled over and breathalyzed which, on this particular occasion, is just as darned well because I had no business being on the road and I was young and foolish and knew no better

:

:lol:

this story (and Pads') reminds me of when I was in Hawaii at about age 18 or so.....some friends had some friends there who owned a Chinese restaurant. So, there were about 18 of us for dinner and these owners put on a HUGE feast.......like 12 courses er sumfin, maybe more? Well, I was a skinny girl who didn't eat huge quantities.....and they were INSULTED if you didn't clean your plate for each course.....and they kept giving MORE and MORE. :blink: So, after about the sixth course, I went all bulimic and went into the bathroom and barphed it all up, so I could hold MORE. :huh::lol: 'Twas the only time I self-induced vomiting from too much food, but 'twas most necessary :lol:

Susie . . . congrats about the new gluten-free job at the dog park *giggle* . . . more details please or that's what we are going to call it!!

:lol: Yes, Dog Park job!! an amazing blessing, so far. I don't want to speak too soon.....I have a tendency to go south with employment.....

GIANKNIT!!!!!!!!

first of all you were VERY PHUNNY last night all by yerself *cackle* :lol: x 50

but second :o SKEETER!! Um.....yes, keep a close eye on that rash, good thing you're on top of it and doctors are responding. You WILL get to the bottom of it......my only experience w/ Reglan was with my late, beautiful Tika Dog......she took it ONE TIME for excessive vomiting/diarrhea and

WENT CRAZY.......... I had taken her to an emergency vet on the weekend as I thought she was dying - they gave her Reglan and it made her completely nuts....for HOURS she went round and round the tables, chairs, into and out of bathrooms, in a crazy, incessant, mad, speeding circle - it was soooooo sad and awful to watch. She DID experience the side effects (mania, in that case) and never took it again. I think it's an evil drug......hope Skeet's okay, bless her!!

Bev's drunk story w/ body parts :lol:

Oh fine. If Janet's doing laundry, I guess I could throw a load in as well.

:lol: well, why not.

Wonder how she is feeling after all the wodka?? We didn't get any chirpy good morning peeps from her :unsure:

where IS she? :unsure:

Sorry I wasn't on earlier.......was doin me laundry.( No psilly to be found)

Is that how everyone spent Valentine's Day?

Um, yes, and then some. Laundry, cleaning, yard work, errands, cooking....all alone, of course. But, it's a good thing I don't give a rat's arse about the VD :lol:

Have fun spendin' yer money, Leese!

Sillz......I'm supposed to go to the Billionaire's house on Tuesday.....for two nights......remember the story? my HS friend who married a (literally) Forbes billionaire, lives in Arnold Schwarzenegger's old house (and he and Maria are building a 20,000 sq. foot new house next door to them).....um........am sooooooo skeert...........wardrobe problems, for one thing :lol: they all know I am going to look like a hobo......what they DON"T know is that I will be mistaken for the hired help

*cackle(

more later!

Jestgar Rising Star

Shabby chic. It's the newest "thing" coming out of Fresno...

Jestgar Rising Star

Lyle has started sleeping on my computer chair, and he keeps body slamming my legs, presumably telling me to get out 'cause he wants to go to bed. :P

mushroom Proficient

Lyle has started sleeping on my computer chair, and he keeps body slamming my legs, presumably telling me to get out 'cause he wants to go to bed. :P

Two computers, two chairs, cat in one, hub in other; which one to boot??? Who do I need most tonight??? :lol:

kareng Grand Master

Hub was home yesterday & had a big agenda. Got a new compooter that I havent managed to make work yet. You should be able to plug them in & go.

Comments on yesterdays post (keeping it brief):

Jokes: Funny

Skeeter: Awful

Houston weather: jealous

Laundry: running

Birthday $: Phun!

Cat in chair: Sweet

nikki-uk Enthusiast

HI PEEPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well, I survived the Russian parrrtay :lol:

T'was GOOD!!....GADS them Ruskies know how to party.....

The food was FANTASTIC...OMG!...Russian coleslaw :P , whole sides of beef, ham, fish dishes...it just kept coming!!!!!!!!

T'would seem alot of their food IS gluten-free ('cept the cakes.. <_< )

....she would NOT accept empty plate OR glass

Good job I ate so much....soaked up the half a litRE of Stolychnaya vodka :wacko:

<Oh my head!>

GYianne-eet!!!!!

WIH's going on wiv Smackl?.... gads! :o

The docs like to tell us that there's NO link between celiac disease and allergies

<_<

..but both Al & Tel have had some pretty weird reactions themselves to varying drugs over the years.

I think as a parent you KNOW summat's up....hang tight J, you'll suss it out.

Talking of docs, - Tel got the results of his 'stress test' he had done on his heart.....there were abnormalities and they want him now to have an angiogram :unsure:

SOOZE!!!!!!!!!! ...Billionaires partay?!?!

Oh PLEEEEAZE GO!!!!!!!

....and just so you know....I have HOT WATER AND HEAT!!!!!!!!!! AND I don't akshully hang me washing out 'til at least April ;):lol:

Off to watch some o' the highlights of the Olympics (well done Canucks BTW!!!)...stupid time difference <_<

DingoGirl Enthusiast

Well, I survived the Russian parrrtay :lol:

T'was GOOD!!....GADS them Ruskies know how to party.....

The food was FANTASTIC...OMG!...Russian coleslaw :P , whole sides of beef, ham, fish dishes...it just kept coming!!!!!!!!

T'would seem alot of their food IS gluten-free ('cept the cakes.. <_< )

....she would NOT accept empty plate OR glass

Good job I ate so much....soaked up the half a litRE of Stolychnaya vodka :wacko:

<Oh my head!>

NIKKERS!!!!! this sounds FABULUSH!!!!! You shoulda asked if you coulda brung all yer sills!! ;)

Tel's heart??? it has taken THIS LONG to find out he has abnormalities? :angry: Weren't we first talking about this QUITE a while back? when's the angiogram, six months from now? <_< Oh Nik, hope it's soon and he's okay.......

and, ye got yer BOILER back! :lol:

Um, Sills.........can everyone see me post here? :unsure:

Could you all just do a quick acknowledgment if you CAN see the drivel I write?

and if you can't, well, could you tell me that also? :lol:

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