Jump to content

  • Welcome to Celiac.com!

    You have found your celiac tribe! Join us and ask questions in our forum, share your story, and connect with others.


  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A1):
    Celiac.com Sponsor (A1-M):

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Our Content
    eNewsletter
    Donate

The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

TriticusToxicum

Recommended Posts

GlutenFreeManna Rising Star
GlutenFreeManna
Posted

They also require gatorade & Mt Dew. I will have them talk endlessly about servos & regulators, fireworks & violent vidoe games. Then they can hit each other & burp! I will tell them under no circumstances to help with the cooking, warming up, serving or cleaning up of the foodstuffs. Perhaps they can spill blue gatorade on MIL's lovely white blouse? The blue doesn't come out of cotton.

Once the ILs go home, you can have the boys back for dinner. They will make a gluten-free dessert & help you grill or make pasta. They can talk about movies & thier jobs and normal stuff.

My MIL told my hub when we were dating that we Catholics just want to have 12 kids & take over the world. 2 of her 3 son's married Catholics & one became Catholic.

Sounds like your boys are related to my husband. Our fridge is always stocked with Mt Dew and Gatorade. Although we are currently only drinking the real sugar Mt Dew. Will they mind no high fructous corn syrup or should I buy the regular stuff to encourage extra bad behavior?

To tell the truth, we really don't drink much. I will have wine or champagne for a special occaision but I'm not a big drinker. I guess moving calls for celebration. :P

Your MIL sure sounds nice. My MIL told my husband when he was a little boy that he should never get married. At all.

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


  • Replies 51k
  • Created
  • Last Reply
Darn210 Enthusiast
Darn210
Posted

My MIL told my hub when we were dating that we Catholics just want to have 12 kids & take over the world.

Isn't that common knowledge . . . hence the "no contraception" rule. Also, the Pope owns a ton of stock in the fishing industry. That's why we have the "no meat on Fridays during Lent" rule . . . it really brings in a lot of money. The financial resources for taking over the world has to come from somewhere.

kareng Grand Master
kareng
Posted

Sounds like your boys are related to my husband. Our fridge is always stocked with Mt Dew and Gatorade. Although we are currently only drinking the real sugar Mt Dew. Will they mind no high fructous corn syrup or should I buy the regular stuff to encourage extra bad behavior?To tell the truth, we really don't drink much. I will have wine or champagne for a special occaision but I'm not a big drinker. I guess moving calls for celebration. :P Your MIL sure sounds nice. My MIL told my husband when he was a little boy that he should never get married. At all.

We prefer the Throwback Dew! My MIL was a mess.

Isn't that common knowledge . . . hence the "no contraception" rule. Also, the Pope owns a ton of stock in the fishing industry. That's why we have the "no meat on Fridays during Lent" rule . . . it really brings in a lot of money. The financial resources for taking over the world has to come from somewhere.

Fishing is the way to get rich! :blink:

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

HEY! I wanna clink glasses with POETER and his proffered martini, for I think he presented that "cheers" for more than a nod at tolerating in-laws....for today is a very special day....

*********************HAPPY CANADA DAY!!!!*********************

And guess who happened to stop by and help us Canucks celebrate?

Now, watch carefully, and count back from the front of the crowd of 450,000 people about sixty rows.......Look!! Look!! it's ME! Canna miss me......

kareng Grand Master
kareng
Posted

HEY! I wanna clink glasses with POETER and his proffered martini, for I think he presented that "cheers" for more than a nod at tolerating in-laws....for today is a very special day....

*********************HAPPY CANADA DAY!!!!*********************

And guess who happened to stop by and help us Canucks celebrate?

Now, watch carefully, and count back from the front of the crowd of 450,000 people about sixty rows.......Look!! Look!! it's ME! Canna miss me......

Of course they are on thier way to your house to sit in the ho tub & drink copious amounts of wine!

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

All right.... . . .. ...I have unfortunately had too much celebratory wine to be writing long, and not enough to be tyepinggg liyk Jyessssssess . .. . ..

Manna, your IL rant has been SO timely for me. . . .. ....my MIL is currently here, staying with us for three weeks (she's here three times a year, usually), and while it is difficult for me to tolerate her in anything more than very small doses (and moderate, regular doses of alcohol are standard procedure during her stay), I now feel quite fortunate after reading your situation. Man.. .. . . . ...actually, maybe if we started moving every year, she would stay away from the prospect of bathtub -for-a-bed........ . . .. . ..hmmm....ya got me thinkin'.. . . . . <_<

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

Of course they are on thier way to your house to sit in the ho tub & drink copious amounts of wine!

Crap, as long as my MIL doesn't drive them. . .. . .

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


psawyer Proficient
psawyer
Posted

And did you catch how Canadian Kate's hat is. Look closely. Those are red maple leaves. Totally Canadian, eh?

Here's a better look:

1b6ce9a5456a8b3c081531bbd26a.webp

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

And did you catch how Canadian Kate's hat is. Look closely. Those are red maple leaves. Totally Canadian, eh?

Here's a better look:

1b6ce9a5456a8b3c081531bbd26a.webp

A whole lot easier than attempting to prop a beaver on that hat.. .. .. ....

kareng Grand Master
kareng
Posted

A whole lot easier than attempting to prop a beaver on that hat.. .. .. ....

So true! Unfortunately, if she were to visit me, she would put wheat stalks on her head. :angry:

GlutenFreeManna Rising Star
GlutenFreeManna
Posted

All right.... . . .. ...I have unfortunately had too much celebratory wine to be writing long, and not enough to be tyepinggg liyk Jyessssssess . .. . ..

Manna, your IL rant has been SO timely for me. . . .. ....my MIL is currently here, staying with us for three weeks (she's here three times a year, usually), and while it is difficult for me to tolerate her in anything more than very small doses (and moderate, regular doses of alcohol are standard procedure during her stay), I now feel quite fortunate after reading your situation. Man.. .. . . . ...actually, maybe if we started moving every year, she would stay away from the prospect of bathtub -for-a-bed........ . . .. . ..hmmm....ya got me thinkin'.. . . . . <_<

No way, I could tolerate the IL's for 3 weeks! Actually I can barely stand my own parents that long. After a week I'm ready to leave or have them go home if they are visiting me. I always considered myself to have a good relationship with them too compared to most my friends relationships with their parents. I guess I'm a bad adult child. I love them they just annoy me after so long....glad I could stir up some promising solutions to your IL situation however. Maybe instead of moving you could choose to be remodeling the guest room or have a roof leak only over the guest bed or something? Close the doorway off with caution tape and tell them they will have to sleep in the bathtub instead?

GlutenFreeManna Rising Star
GlutenFreeManna
Posted

And did you catch how Canadian Kate's hat is. Look closely. Those are red maple leaves. Totally Canadian, eh?

Here's a better look:

1b6ce9a5456a8b3c081531bbd26a.webp

She makes it look so elegant! Happy Canada Day! :)

GlutenFreeManna Rising Star
GlutenFreeManna
Posted

Of course they are on thier way to your house to sit in the ho tub & drink copious amounts of wine!

So was this a typo or does she really have a ho tub? I can't see princess Kate sitting in one though.... :lol:

psawyer Proficient
psawyer
Posted

So was this a typo or does she really have a ho tub? I can't see princess Kate sitting in one though.... :lol:

That was not a typo. :ph34r:

New members of the thread sometimes don't know of our history, of which Em's ho tub is just one element. Long time members here also know of the yeti, my balls, and other esoteric stuff.

Members have come and gone since then, but there are a core group of us who have been here for a long time.

A brief history of the early days is here.

sb2178 Enthusiast
sb2178
Posted

oooh, so happy I don't have an MIL who would descend the day before I move. I like my own mother. I might even have her come pack, as she is a master packer. I always have a moving crisis on my own, so adding another stressor would not help.

Another vote for the bath tub approach!

(And happy canada day)

GlutenFreeManna Rising Star
GlutenFreeManna
Posted

A bit of silly history, for the newbies.

This thread was started almost three years ago by Richard (TriticusToxicum). It took more than a year to reach 200 pages, at which point the phirst poster on page 200, Bev (Mntdog) was declared to be the Queen of the Sillies (normal spelling was still in effect). Since then, the first poster on a page which is a multiple of 100 becomes the King or Queen for the next 100 pages (1,500 posts).

I joined the group on page 327 in November of 2007, with a post about Amanda's honeymoon. :ph34r:

Members have come and gone since then, but there are a lot of us who have been here for a long time.

The history of the monarchy, as it happened, is as follows:

Monarch ... Crowned .. Reign

----------------------------

Richard . 29-Sep-2006 . 374

Beverly . 08-Oct-2007 .. 19

Amanda .. 27-Oct-2007 .. 37

Tom ..... 03-Dec-2007 .. 32

Jess .... 04-Jan-2008 .. 26

Sarah ... 30-Jan-2008 .. 27

Tom ..... 26-Feb-2008 .. 31

Jess .... 28-Mar-2008 .. 38

Peter ... 05-May-2008 .. 29

Emily ... 03-Jun-2008 .. 31

Nikki ... 04-Jul-2008 .. 34

Susie ... 07-Aug-2008 .. 28

Janet ... 04-Sep-2008 .. 33

Erica ... 07-Oct-2008 .. 31

Jacquie . 07-Nov-2008 .. 34

Amanda .. 11-Dec-2008 .. 35

Susie ... 15-Jan-2009 ... 2*

Lisa H .. 17-Jan-2009 .. 29

Nikki ... 15-Feb-2009 .. 36

Patti ... 23-Mar-2009 .. 42

Rachel .. 04-May-2009 .. 51

Jess .... 24-Jun-2009 .. 65

Julie A . 28-Aug-2009 ... ?

*Go to page 1700 and read on to understand the quick turnover. :rolleyes:

Due to some posts having been deleted from the thread, you will see a different version if you go to the hundred-multiple pages. The chronology reflects the ascensions as they happened.

If you read the whole thread:

1. You need to get a life (I did read the whole thing when it was 327 pages);

2. You will understand about parades, the yeti, and the Royal Courtiers;

3. You will realize that we will talk about ANYTHING here, and there is never TMI;

4. You will still not understand our obsessive need to discuss private body parts.

Welcome to all the newbies! This is a safe, phun place to hang out.

Thank you for the brief history. I guess I will just nod and smile. I have no life but I'm too lazy to read it all. :lol:

sb2178 Enthusiast
sb2178
Posted

Thank you for the brief history. I guess I will just nod and smile. I have no life but I'm too lazy to read it all. :lol:

ditttto. (deetwo?) ((D2 R2...?)) (((QE2!!)))

Okay. stopping. halted. going to go fold clothes now. And finish off the Friday G & T.

curlyfries Contributor
curlyfries
Posted

That was not a typo. :ph34r:

Actually, didn't it come about because of a typo? One must be careful here, because typos can become part of the 'normal'. Like Jess's civkebs :P

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

New members of the thread sometimes don't know of our history, of which Em's ho tub is just one element. Long time members here also know of the yeti, my balls, and other esoteric stuff.

POeter's balls!!! :lol: :lol: Forgot about these. . . . . . .

Are they really esoteric, POeter?. .. ...

:lol:B)

This just kills me every time. I remember clearly when Oracle POeter joined this bunch, wondering what was going on, and we all sent him off with instructions to read the whole thread before participating further. And HE DID!! :lol:

curlyfries Contributor
curlyfries
Posted

HEY!!!!!

Where is my dancing penguin?????

:angry: :angry:

Can anyone else see it? :unsure:

mushroom Proficient
mushroom
Posted

Yep, he's still there, jigging away :D

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

Actually, didn't it come about because of a typo? One must be careful here, because typos can become part of the 'normal'. Like Jess's civkebs :P

Nope. This one was not a typo. There was a lengthy exchange about three thousand pages ago about Home Depot, and I wondered aloud if there was a "Ho Depot" anywhere (two letters burnt out on the sign).. . . . . . .then we pondered what would be sold at such an establishment, if there would be scratch and dent sales, if they would accept rainchecks.. . . . . ....

That seemed to move to my HOT tub being called a ho tub, shortly after I found, incredibly, a crutch tip at the bottom of said tub when we drained it for the summer.

We played 20 questions -- Okay, you need to try to guess what was sitting on one of the seats of my tub when we emptied it this afternoon... ... . ..

:lol:

I think Ptaoughmghmn eventually got it.

After a couple of hints.

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

HEY!!!!!

Where is my dancing penguin?????

Can anyone else see it? :unsure:

No, I cannot! :huh: .. . . . . ....Whassup?

You know something? I think Manna's in-laws have it.. . . . ...

GlutenFreeManna Rising Star
GlutenFreeManna
Posted

I can't see any dancing penguines. Maybe I need a drink of whatever y'all are drinking. :lol:

GlutenFreeManna Rising Star
GlutenFreeManna
Posted

Nope. This one was not a typo. There was a lengthy exchange about three thousand pages ago about Home Depot, and I wondered aloud if there was a "Ho Depot" anywhere (two letters burnt out on the sign).. . . . . . .then we pondered what would be sold at such an establishment, if there would be scratch and dent sales, if they would accept rainchecks.. . . . . ....

That seemed to move to my HOT tub being called a ho tub, shortly after I found, incredibly, a crutch tip at the bottom of said tub when we drained it for the summer.

We played 20 questions -- Okay, you need to try to guess what was sitting on one of the seats of my tub when we emptied it this afternoon... ... . ..

:lol:

I think Ptaoughmghmn eventually got it.

After a couple of hints.

Nice history. I had also thought perhaps it was a typo that became part of the vernacular. So dare I ask how a crutch tip got in the ho tub?

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Go to topic listing

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Celiac.com:
    Join eNewsletter
    Donate
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A17):
    Celiac.com Sponsor (A17):



    Celiac.com Sponsors (A17-M):



  • Recent Activity

    1. knitty kitty
      - knitty kitty replied to Scott Adams's topic in Post Diagnosis, Recovery & Treatment of Celiac Disease
      49

      Supplements for those Diagnosed with Celiac Disease

      Hello, @asaT, I'm curious to know whether you are taking other B vitamins like Thiamine B1 and Niacin B3. Malabsorption in Celiac disease affects all the water soluble B vitamins and Vitamin C. Thiamine and Niacin are required to produce energy for all the homocysteine lowering reactions provided by Folate, Cobalamine and Pyridoxine. Weight...
    2. Florence Lillian
      - Florence Lillian replied to Jane02's topic in Gluten-Free Foods, Products, Shopping & Medications
      11

      Desperately need a vitamin D supplement. I've reacted to most brands I've tried.

      Hi Jane: You may want to try the D3 I now take. I have reactions to fillers and many additives. Sports Research, it is based in the USA and I have had no bad reactions with this brand. The D3 does have coconut oil but it is non GMO, it is Gluten free, Soy free, Soybean free and Safflower oil free. I have a cupboard full of supplements that did not agree...
    3. catnapt
      - catnapt replied to catnapt's topic in Celiac Disease Pre-Diagnosis, Testing & Symptoms
      2

      results from 13 day gluten challenge - does this mean I can't have celiac?

      highly unlikely NOTHING and I mean NOTHING else has ever caused me these kinds of symptoms I have no problem with dates, they are a large part of my diet In fact, I eat a very high fiber, very high vegetable and bean diet and have for many years now. It's considered a whole foods plant based or plant forward diet (I do now eat some lean...
    4. cristiana
      - cristiana replied to hjayne19's topic in Post Diagnosis, Recovery & Treatment of Celiac Disease
      21

      Insomnia help

      Thank you for your post, @nanny marley It is interesting what you say about 'It's OK not to sleep'. Worrying about sleeping only makes it much harder to sleep. One of my relatives is an insomniac and I am sure that is part of the problem. Whereas I once had a neighbour who, if she couldn't sleep, would simply get up again, make a cup of tea, read,...
    5. SilkieFairy
      - SilkieFairy replied to catnapt's topic in Celiac Disease Pre-Diagnosis, Testing & Symptoms
      2

      results from 13 day gluten challenge - does this mean I can't have celiac?

      It could be a fructan intolerance? How do you do with dates? https://www.dietvsdisease.org/sorry-your-gluten-sensitivity-is-actually-a-fructan-intolerance/
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A19):

  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      133,354
    • Most Online (within 30 mins)
      7,748
    Gracieruizzz
    Newest Member
    Gracieruizzz
    Joined
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A20):
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A22):

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      121.6k
    • Total Posts
      1m
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A21):

  • Upcoming Events

  • Posts

    • knitty kitty
      Supplements for those Diagnosed with Celiac Disease

      By knitty kitty · Posted

      Hello, @asaT, I'm curious to know whether you are taking other B vitamins like Thiamine B1 and Niacin B3.  Malabsorption in Celiac disease affects all the water soluble B vitamins and Vitamin C.  Thiamine and Niacin are required to produce energy for all the homocysteine lowering reactions provided by Folate, Cobalamine and Pyridoxine.   Weight gain with a voracious appetite is something I experienced while malnourished.  It's symptomatic of Thiamine B1 deficiency.   Conversely, some people with thiamine deficiency lose their appetite altogether, and suffer from anorexia.  At different periods on my lifelong journey, I suffered this, too.   When the body doesn't have sufficient thiamine to turn food, especially carbohydrates, into energy (for growth and repair), the body rations what little thiamine it has available, and turns the carbs into fat, and stores it mostly in the abdomen.  Consuming a high carbohydrate diet requires additional thiamine to process the carbs into energy.  Simple carbohydrates (sugar, white rice, etc.) don't contain thiamine, so the body easily depletes its stores of Thiamine processing the carbs into fat.  The digestive system communicates with the brain to keep eating in order to consume more thiamine and other nutrients it's not absorbing.   One can have a subclinical thiamine insufficiency for years.  A twenty percent increase in dietary thiamine causes an eighty percent increase in brain function, so the symptoms can wax and wane mysteriously.  Symptoms of Thiamine insufficiency include stunted growth, chronic fatigue, and Gastrointestinal Beriberi (diarrhea, abdominal pain), heart attack, Alzheimer's, stroke, and cancer.   Thiamine improves bone turnover.  Thiamine insufficiency can also affect the thyroid.  The thyroid is important in bone metabolism.  The thyroid also influences hormones, like estrogen and progesterone, and menopause.  Vitamin D, at optimal levels, can act as a hormone and can influence the thyroid, as well as being important to bone health, and regulating the immune system.  Vitamin A is important to bone health, too, and is necessary for intestinal health, as well.   I don't do dairy because I react to Casein, the protein in dairy that resembles gluten and causes a reaction the same as if I'd been exposed to gluten, including high tTg IgA.  I found adding mineral water containing calcium and other minerals helpful in increasing my calcium intake.   Malabsorption of Celiac affects all the vitamins and minerals.  I do hope you'll talk to your doctor and dietician about supplementing all eight B vitamins and the four fat soluble vitamins because they all work together interconnectedly.  
    • Florence Lillian
      Desperately need a vitamin D supplement. I've reacted to most brands I've tried.

      By Florence Lillian · Posted

      Hi Jane: You may want to try the D3 I now take. I have reactions to fillers and many additives. Sports Research, it is based in the USA and I have had no bad reactions with this brand. The D3 does have coconut oil but it is non GMO, it is Gluten free, Soy free, Soybean free and Safflower oil free.  I have a cupboard full of supplements that did not agree with me -  I just keep trying and have finally settled on Sports Research. I take NAKA Women's Multi full spectrum, and have not felt sick after taking 2 capsules per day -  it is a Canadian company. I buy both from Amazon. I wish you well in your searching, I know how discouraging it all is. Florence.  
    • catnapt
      results from 13 day gluten challenge - does this mean I can't have celiac?

      By catnapt · Posted

      highly unlikely  NOTHING and I mean NOTHING else has ever caused me these kinds of symptoms I have no problem with dates, they are a large part of my diet In fact, I eat a very high fiber, very high vegetable and bean diet and have for many years now. It's considered a whole foods plant based or plant forward diet (I do now eat some lean ground turkey but not much) I was off dairy for years but recently had to add back plain yogurt to meet calcium needs that I am not allowed to get from supplements (I have not had any problem with the yogurt)   I eat almost no processed foods. I don't eat out. almost everything I eat, I cook myself I am going to keep a food diary but to be honest, I already know that it's wheat products and also barley that are the problem, which is why I gradually stopped eating and buying them. When I was eating them, like back in early 2024, when I was in the middle of moving and ate out (always had bread or toast or rolls or a sub or pizza) I felt terrible but at that time was so busy and exhausted that I never stopped to think it was the food. Once I was in my new place, I continued to have bread from time to time and had such horrible joint pain that I was preparing for 2 total knee replacements as well as one hip! The surgery could not go forward as I was (and still am) actively losing calcium from my bones. That problem has yet to be properly diagnosed and treated   anyway over time I realized that I felt better when I stopped eating bread. Back at least 3 yrs ago I noticed that regular pasta made me sick so I switched to brown rice pasta and even though it costs a lot more, I really like it.   so gradually I just stopped buying and eating foods with gluten. I stopped getting raisin bran when I was constipated because it made me bloated and it didn't help the constipation any more (used to be a sure bet that it would in the past)   I made cookies and brownies using beans and rolled oats and dates and tahini and I LOVE them and have zero issues eating those I eat 1 or more cans of beans per day easily can eat a pound of broccoli - no problem! Brussels sprouts the same thing.   so yeh it's bread and related foods that are clearly the problem  there is zero doubt in my mind    
    • cristiana
      Insomnia help

      By cristiana · Posted

      Thank you for your post, @nanny marley It is interesting what you say about 'It's OK not to sleep'. Worrying about sleeping only makes it much harder to sleep.  One of my relatives is an insomniac and I am sure that is part of the problem.  Whereas I once had a neighbour who, if she couldn't sleep, would simply get up again, make a cup of tea, read, do a sudoku or some other small task, and then go back to bed when she felt sleepy again.  I can't think it did her any harm - she lived  well into her nineties. Last week I decided to try a Floradix Magnesium supplement which seems to be helping me to sleep better.  It is a liquid magnesium supplement, so easy to take.  It is gluten free (unlike the Floradix iron supplement).  Might be worth a try.        
    • SilkieFairy
      results from 13 day gluten challenge - does this mean I can't have celiac?

      By SilkieFairy · Posted

      It could be a fructan intolerance? How do you do with dates?  https://www.dietvsdisease.org/sorry-your-gluten-sensitivity-is-actually-a-fructan-intolerance/
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

NOTICE: This site places This site places cookies on your device (Cookie settings). on your device. Continued use is acceptance of our Terms of Use, and Privacy Policy.