The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

[DingoGirl]

SILLIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

just the briefest of poop-ins. Have just only read Nik's post (STILL in phorumless abyss? gads - evil!)

Bevvy got PICC-ed? don't know the details yet but hope it wasn't too traumatic.....

no word from Sarah?

I am vacationing staying wif Gail as she house sits at her mum's. Most glorious house (here in town but feels out-of-town). We are luxuriating........and Weezee is out of her mind, 'tis in the older part of town where they DO NOT cut down all the trees and so many, many SQUIRRELS in the huge back yard!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Paddeigh - you'll like this - am watching marathons of madmen. have nearly finished the last disc of season one - now will watch this season's episodes (via ON DEMAND ) over there. Came home for supplies. May not return here until Monday. We keep the air quite comfy there - freeze ourselves out. 'tis 106 (or some bloody high number) this weekend..... AND I"M STUCK IN TOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHERE IS MY FABULOUS HUSBAND WITH A CABIN AT HUNTINGTON LAKE?????????

Anywho, am suspended in unreality at the manse over there and in the sixties TV series am currently watching (possibly the most addictive programME ever - Mad Men). Drinking beverages out of tall-stemmed glasses. WISH YOU ALL WERE HERE!!!!!!!!!!

Have not read a single thing and am so behind.........must catch up later.

CARRY ON SILLIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

<Jess - love yer sig >

[Lisa]

Here is a funny for those who remember Hollywood Squares. Here are some classics:

VERY FUNNY FOR US WHO REMEMBERHollywoodSquares:If you remember the Original Hollywood Squares and its comics, this may bring a tear to your eyes. These great questions and answers are from the days when ' Hollywood Squares' game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course..Q. Do female frogs croak?A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads underwater long enough.Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married?A. Rose Marie: No wait until morning.Q.Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.Q.In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say 'I Love You'?A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.Q. What are 'Do It,' 'I Can Help,' and 'I Can't Get Enough'?A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment.Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.

Q.

Paul,

why do Hell's Angels wear leather?

A.

Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too

easily.

Q. Charley,

you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the

first year?

A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy

growing strawberries.

Q. In

bowling, what's a perfect score?

A.

Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.

Q.

It

is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is

politics, what is the other?

A.

Paul Lynde: Tape measures.

Q.D

uring a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the

closet?

A.

Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the

bedroom.

Q. Can

boys join the Camp Fire Girls?

A. Marty Allen: Only after lights

out.

Q. When

you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose

do?

A.

Paul Lynde: Make him bark?

Q. If

you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth

to?

A.

Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the

dark.

Q. According

to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a

lot of people?

A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the

army.

Q.

It

is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is

it?

A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it

certainly isn't neglected.

Q.

Back in

the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying

to do?

A.

George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.

Q. Who

stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your

elephant?

A.

Paul Lynde: Who told you about my

elephant?

Q.

When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its

sex?

A. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is

up to him

Q. Jackie

Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen

them on at least two occasions. What are

they?

A. Charley Weaver: His

feet.

Q.

According

to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in

bed?

A.

Paul Lynde: Point and

laugh.

[JNBunnie1]

Q.

According

to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in

bed?

A.

Paul Lynde: Point and

laugh.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[elye]

Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a

lot of people?

A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.

Thanks fer that trip down memory lane, Lisa.....fabulous!!!

[jerseyangel]

Hi Soozle--hope you see this before you go back.....Patti is pleased that you are watching Mad Men! Wish I could watch wif ya--sounds mahvelous!!!!

Enjoy yer get-away

[Mtndog]

Gah- of course I icked this one, "9. Honest......one who admits he farted but offers a good medical reason" and of course it fits!!!!! :lol:

Good Morning, Sillies!

Well, I was indeed scared last night...... . . . . ..we have quite a number of bored, angry, confused spirits in this city, appearing from time to time in hotel bedrooms, stairways, hallways, kitchens and attics. The most unsettling, for me, are the auditory experiences - - hearing voices and whispering, footsteps, dragging noises on the floorboards..... . .. .

Noticed Jack a few times, staring wide-eyed at our tour guide , moving uncomfortably from foot to foot.......but surprisingly, he slept very well.

On top of it all, we learned a great deal of history of Ottawa.

Have any of you Sillies ever seen or heard a ghost? I was going to start a thread on it.... .. . I have heard one, for certain....... . . . . ...:scaredlittleface:

Bev! Purple is the coloUr of royalty! It denotes luxury, wealth and sophistication - - very feminine and romantic. This is all you!!

I LOVE you guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My bruise, I believe, looks like the face of Chuck Norris

I have not SEEN a ghost but I "felt" a presence at an inn on the Olympic Peninsula (my VERY skeptical friend felt it as well) and I heard one singing at an inn in CA. I have a friend who actually left this area because she saw way too many!!!!!! I LOVE ghost stories.

Didn't know that Ottawa was so haunted!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi Spruezee and ryan!!!!!! Nikki- come baaaccckkkkk.........

[Judyin Philly]

great day in sillyville.

loved the trip down memory lane

[Jestgar]

Here is a funny for those who remember Hollywood Squares. Here are some classics:

I could hear Paul Lynde's voice answering

[Judyin Philly]

I could hear Paul Lynde's voice answering

and his great giggly laugh.

he was so funny!

[jerseyangel]

and his great giggly laugh.

he was so funny!

I loved that show...I remember watching while eating lunch during summer vacation.

[Mtndog]

I loved that show...I remember watching while eating lunch during summer vacation.

OMG- that show was SO funny!!!!! Loved it!

Used to love All My Children too- who remembers Cliff and Nina?

[jerseyangel]

Used to love All My Children too- who remembers Cliff and Nina?

I do! Nina always had the most exquisite clothes

[Mtndog]

Uncle Ray drove by:

Dating in the 60's

It was a hot Saturday evening in the summer of 1960 and Fred

had a date with Peggy Sue. He arrived at her house and rang the bell.

'Oh, come on in!' Peggy Sue's mother said as she welcomed

Fred in . 'Have a seat in the living room. Would you like

something to drink? Lemonade? Iced tea?'

'Iced tea, please,' Fred said. Mom brought the iced tea.

'So, what are you and Peggy planning to do tonight?' she

asked.

'Oh, probably catch a movie, then maybe grab a bite to eat

at the malt shop, maybe take a walk on the beach...'

'Peggy likes to screw, you know,' Mom informed him.

'Really?' Fred asked, eyebrows rose.

'Oh yes,' the mother continued. 'When she goes out with her

friends, that's all they do!'

'Is that so?' asked Fred, incredulous.

'Yes,' said the mother. 'As a matter of fact, she'd screw all

night if we let her!'

&n bsp;

'Well, thanks for the tip!' Fred said as he began thinking

about alternate plans for the evening. A moment later, Peggy

Sue came down the stairs looking pretty as a picture wearing a

pink blouse and a hoop skirt, and with her hair tied back in a

bouncy ponytail. She greeted Fred.

'Have fun, kids!' the mother said as they l eft.

Half an hour later, a completely disheveled Peggy Sue

burst into the house and slammed the front door behind her.

'Twist, Mom!' she angrily yelled to her mother in the kitchen.

'The fricking dance is called the Twist!

[jerseyangel]

'The fricking dance is called the Twist!

[elye]

Gahhhhhhh! The twist!..... . . ..

Everyone's quiet tonight........ . . ...this is a good thing, as I've been out and usually have a couple of pages to catch up on......... . .excuse me, up on which to catch......... . .

Still no word from our Sarah... . ... . ...... ..

Sooozie's hunkered down wif Gail.... . . ......

Ptaoughmghmn!... ..... . ....Hope you're okay... .. . ...

Our Uterusless Jess seems splendid...... . . . . ....

[blueeyedmanda]

Did you guys hear that if this hurricane hits the gulf straight on we can be paying 4.40 for gas.....thats horrid!!!!

[Judyin Philly]

the twist

Did you guys hear that if this hurricane hits the gulf straight on we can be paying 4.40 for gas.....thats horrid!!!!

Let's hope not but I'm sure it's going to hit somewhere.

Talked to Dianne and heard from Maggie (their friends of some of us from d/s)......both near Lafayette in the path of the hurricane.

Maggie has 2 big trailers on pecan Island they have to move the traffic all standing still and most stations out of gas this afternoon. I sure hope they'll be ok. at 4:00 am all incoming lanes will be turned into outgoing.

I better get gas tomorrow as it lower now and i'm sure it will be going up.

hugs all

[blueeyedmanda]

it already started going up here.....was 3.39 and now its up to 3.49 at the lowest.....

The news said that 4.45 will be low if the refineries take a hit..

[elye]

Good Sunday Morning, Sillies!

Ugh, gas prices........It may well be $1.75/litre here by October... ... ....... .. . ..

But let's make ourselves feel much better.. . .. .Nik, whatcha shelling out fer gas over the next few weeks?

[jerseyangel]

Happy Sunday Sillies!!!

Yeah Em--it was quiet here last night......I was met by the tumbleweeds Hopefully this means everyone was having a phun Saturday night.

[Daxin]

Hi, Ryan!

Was thinking of you when I remembered the big Labour Day match-up tomorrow between the Roughriders and the Blue Bombers. Is it in Regina or Winnipeg?

Emily,

The Labour Day Classic is always in Regina (GO RIDERS!!) We are not going to the game, but may go into the city today to get some shopping done. It'll be easy since everyone else in Regina will be watching football.

Amanda, The house looks awesome. Good luck in the search.

Well, off to make some pancakes. Now that DW is home on sundays, we get back to the tradition of having pancakes and bacon for breakfast on Sundays. (MY fav)

[Judyin Philly]

Morning all

Jim and I went to a small last minute couples get together for a deck party at our neighbors next door last nite.

I was so nice to get out with him as we have not had much time for that with his busy schedule.

Had a nice time.

Nice day here in PA but think I'll have to go get gas as i'm low and better fill up

thanks Amanda.

Paid $3.64 last fill up wonder what it will be today?

Judy

[Jestgar]

Woohoo!

Yesterday I went through all my clothes and came up with two garbage bags full to donate AND I found a forgotten stash of pre-gluten-issue shorts and bras!

Planning on playing Suzie homemaker today and taking in some skirts, making some crockpot soup and, what else.... oh yeah, cleaning the cat pee off the chair

And our gas is 3.89. lowest it's been in months

[blueeyedmanda]

Hi Everyone,

We are heading to the Kipona later. We have been watching the Hurricane coverage all day.

We had Landen last night, we took him for a walk to feed the ducks. It was a lot of fun. So now I need to hit the shower or at least the bath tub. It is supposed to be hot today so I need to at least not smell

Bye Sillies

[elye]

It is supposed to be hot today so I need to at least not smell

Okay, Amanda...... . . . .A shower is necessary, but that also means no pharting, in yer neighboUr's window er anywhere else..... . . . ...