This Makes Me Mad

[Guest Clo-Jay]

i dont go to my friends houses to eat anymore, not since i got called rude for asking if they had anything that i could eat! i explained i have celiac disease but she just didnt get it.

she called me rude and said when a person gets invited to someones house to eat dinner then i shouldnt start saying what i can or cant eat! it upset me

i just want to be like all my friends, i dont want to have to think about all this.

i just want to go to my friends houses and do what teenagers do without being called rude!

it makes me mad

love

Chloe

[debmidge]

Your friend sounds immature....especially if they know that your food choices are due to a health condition and not on a whim. If they know the real problem, then they are being mean and maybe you need better friends. It's then never too early to learn that you have to get away from toxc people. Toxic people are people who act like a friend but have no concern or compassion about your personal situation or is indifferent to or attacks your hopes, dreams, fears, etc. You might think that eventually they'll "get it" but they really don't want to "get it." They sometimes even make things happen that trip you up due to jealousy or some feeling that you don't deserve to be happy - only they do. These people pretend to be friends or even friendly - they can be best friends, boy or girl friends, even sometimes relatives.

It hurts to have to dump someone but they did the hurting first. The first thing to do is to determine if your friend really knows your celiac situation and then make a judgment on whether she said what she said out of just not knowing or if she's using this to attack you. Were you told you were being rude by her or her mother/father? If mother/father: do they know you have celiac disease? This might be cleared up by 'fessing up to having celiac disease.

If you've already told them then I'd suggest you break off with these people from now.

Just my 2 cents worth of insight into people ...

[Ashley]

Chloe,

Your friend needs to get real. I think if she was in the same boat as you, she'd be asking for something that she could eat too. It's not rude to ask for food you can eat so you won't get sick.

My suggestions:

1.) Bring food of your own

-This works really well if the friends you are staying with have no clue about celiac disease.

2.) Have your folks talk to your friend and his/her parents about celiac disease in DETAIL.

-Someone people take things more seriously if explained by an adult (which kind of suck )

As Debmidge said, this might not be a friend. It's really sad but it happens. Hopefully, this little issue will get resolved.

Welcome to the Board! Hope you find it useful =)

-Ash

[Random Guy]

maybe you did this, but if not, it might work for you next time

when invited for a meal, say that you would like to accept the offer, however, because of a medical issue, you have a very limited diet, and can't eat a lot of things.

If the person inviting you want to make an effort, they will ask what you can or can't eat, and you might be a happy dinner guest. if not, well, it's a bummer, but don't let it get you down.

but really, without giving advanced notice, it's not likely that you'll be well fed at a friends house.

and also, your friend was rude. (you can't control how your friends act. you can only control how you react to your friends)

it IS a bummer, but good luck

-rg

[tarnalberry]

very self-centered, and immature, friend.

"wah! if I can't have my way, you're bad."

uh... yeah.

[VegasCeliacBuckeye]

One question:

Do you always follow the gluten free diet or have your friends seen you "cheat" before?

I know it sounds stupid, but if they have seen you "cheat", they are less likely to take you seriously.

If you follow the gluten free diet, they are being immature and foolish.

[GF Family of 4 Since 2002]

i dont go to my friends houses to eat anymore, not since i got called rude for asking if they had anything that i could eat! i explained i have celiac disease but she just didnt get it.

she called me rude and said when a person gets invited to someones house to eat dinner then i shouldnt start saying what i can or cant eat! it upset me

i just want to be like all my friends, i dont want to have to think about all this.

i just want to go to my friends houses and do what teenagers do without being called rude!

it makes me mad

love

Chloe

Chloe:

I know how you feel. It gets old fast when you can only have friends come to your house to share a meal.

It's a lot to have to think about all the time, but it really is worth it - and it makes you a stronger more compassionate human for it. So we can only hope that your friends will become more like you, than you will ever be like them.

Do you have some great gluten-free dinners that you like to make ? Next time, offer to bring the food (and cooking equipment) and treat your friends family to a meal that you've prepared for them - in their home. They will be duly impressed. And thinking of you as "rude", will be the farthest thing from their mind !

Remember, we are not the only ones, and sharing our experience with others isn't always as easy as it is necessary...

Love, Lori

[Lollipop]

I was diagnosed with Celiac disease 2 weeks ago, and lately, my friends have been deserting me. Before celiac disease, we thought I had food allergies. I was on an elimination diet for 2 months to find out what food i was allergic to. Ever since then, Ive gotten together with my friends a couple of times, but it was always my idea. I've tried to explain to them my health situation, even with my mom's help, but they don't seem to care. I think some of them are uncomfortable with it, and the others just don't care.

I told my friends that it was ok if we got together, as long as i could bring my own food. They just made some joke about it and dropped the subject. Whenever I invite them over, it seems like they come up with some excuse not to come. they even talk about getting together right in front of me, but then I'm not invited.

I've been told that they aren't the kind of friends i want and that I should get new ones, but they're the only friends I have, and at my school, its not easy to make new friends at this point and expect them to be completely supportive of you, especially with barely any school left.

[confusedks]

Lollipop and Chloe

I have not officially been diagnosed with Celiac (long story) but am on a strict gluten free, egg free, peanut free AND dairy free and am now starting a soy and corn elimination diet. My suggestion would be to maybe eat before you go. Also, I live off of Lara Bars which are fairly easy to find at Trader Joe's and Whole Foods. They are great, easy and cheap(er). I have a friend whose parents served Macaroni and Cheese and Grilled Cheese and Tune Sandwiches when I went over there. I had to just have apple and water. Thankfully I had a Larabar. I also bring Almonds with me wherever I go. It is hard to deal with friends, but you can only do your part. In this case, bringing food is all you can do. As far as school goes, I TOTALLLLYYYY understand. I was absent for 7 weeks and last week was the first week I made it through the whole week without leaving early or being absent for a whole day. Since then, it has been really hard to socialize and it is really easy to feel alienated. I realize this is just because other people's stupidity and we sometimes have to do things we don't like, to take care of ourselves. If you want to talk, feel free to email me or im or pm me.

P.S. When you are called "rude" try to let it roll off your back (I know, it's not as easy as it sounds... ) Just remember they think you're rude, but they aren't going to be sick for the next couple days because of what they ate. You have to take care of you, but nobody else will.

email- knshore@hotmail.com

aim sn- knsgoestonz511

Kassandra

[Liz92]

Hello!!!

Anyhow, I think you should inject your friends with sumthing that temporarily makes them celiac, then have them in that situation, then they'll come around, I'm sure

Seriously though, I think your friends a push off. My friends always help me tons, when I go anywhere, they won't LET me cheat, and they always make sure I can eat something. Yeah, If that's the type of person they really are, drop em. kindly of course. Or just avoid eating around your friends, if thats the only time they're like that... something I highly doubt. actually, Wait a bit. Some of my friends were like that at first(not to that extent though) but now... yah. I told you, huh. It'll work

PS- It doesn't matter if they call you rude. I'm dead serious. If that's the kind of person they are, they won't stick with you as friends. If not, it still doesn't matter.

PS I'm sorry. I hope it works out

[chloeb]

i dont go to my friends houses to eat anymore, not since i got called rude for asking if they had anything that i could eat! i explained i have celiac disease but she just didnt get it.

she called me rude and said when a person gets invited to someones house to eat dinner then i shouldnt start saying what i can or cant eat! it upset me

i just want to be like all my friends, i dont want to have to think about all this.

i just want to go to my friends houses and do what teenagers do without being called rude!

it makes me mad

love

Chloe

sometimes i wish i was like everyone else and was able to eat wheat too. but i know thats just me not being able to eat wheat. s owhen i go to a freinds house i always ask what their having for dinner so i could bring something to eat with me . sometimes it feels akward but after i've done it alot my freinds get use to it and so do i !!!