Vent

[jerseyangel]

It's difficult finding a proper Mother's Day card for her because it can't say "for how wonderful you are/were to me." or "how you sacrificed for me" blah blah. Because it wouldn't be true.

I'm so sorry Deb--I relate to your whole post....for a more suitible Mother's Day card, go to the section the doesn't specify a certain title and there are very nice cards that don't have the sentiments that don't apply.

[kbtoyssni]

I agree with everyone who said this sounds like dysfunctional behavior. And in that case, all the nice, tactful ways of dealing with the situation won't work because your mother will never change. It's a waste of your time to try to convince her not to do this because it's just what she does. As hard as it is, you need to distance yourself from her. Tell her why, and then don't eat lunch with her again unless she apologizes and stops this behavior.

[Bravie]

I know exactly how you feel. I lived with a mom that was like yours, and sometimes worst. It took me an entire year to feel 100% better, I only started feeling better when I left. My mother used to tempt me with all kinds of gluteny foods as well. And sometimes, she would indeed put gluten in my food without me knowing...And when i'd get sick, she would just tell me it was all in my head...

Thankfully, I'm living with a man who understands fully how much pain I go through from the tiniest amount of gluten I eat. He knows all about the gluten free diet, since he's been doing it ever since he got diabetes 2. You know, I don't understand how someone could be so cruel. Just leave us alone and let us do our thing, you know? We're here for you, many of us know exactly how you feel. If you can't convince your mom by getting her to talk to your doctor, i'd say ignore her for a while, until she finally understands how serious Celiac disease is.

[MDRB]

I can feel for you....I've spent my childhood, teen years and young adult years dealing with a mother who said and did cruel things - who tried to spoil good things in my life from happening. In her old age, I am there for her but I don't trust her to do the "right" thing and try to keep an emotional distance. It's difficult finding a proper Mother's Day card for her because it can't say "for how wonderful you are/were to me." or "how you sacrificed for me" blah blah. Because it wouldn't be true.

Thanks for writing this. I don't have the heart to cut my mother out of my life completely, but I moved out of home when I was 16 and have been striving for that 'emotional distance' that you have, ever since. Its strangely comforting to know that other people have had similar experiences. I also know what you mean about having a mother who tries to 'spoil good things in my life', for me this isn't really a gluten specific issue, she has done many things in the course of her life that fit that description (latest of which was trying to convince me that my fiance was keeping secrets from me, LOL)