9 Month Deployment

[K8ling]

Hey guys. My husband just found out that he will be (possibly) going on a 9 month deployment, leaving me to fend for myself. My biggest fear is I will get glutenated (BAD) and have no one here to help me with my 18 month old little boy. Any tips for dealing with this alone? I'm pretty freaked out right now.

[Bobbijo6681]

My best suggestion is to take it one day at a time. Do your best to take care of yourself and your little one and hope for the best. Hopefully he won't have to go(fingers crossed for your family) but if he does just do the best that you can. Line up a few people that you can call for help in a crisis and just do your best. I know you are kinda new to this whole things so hopefully by the time he is ready to leave you will have a better grasp on the diet and will feel much more comfortable than you do now.

Again...remember BREATHE!!! And take one day at a time. Hope for the best, plan for the worst and see where you end up.

[jenngolightly]

The fear of getting glutened subsides after awhile. What's great about being alone is that you can live in a strict, gluten-free household - that way, your chances of getting sick are greatly reduced. Next, figure out some safe meals and stick to them. Rice and chicken? Rice and hamburgers? Rice and ... Your baby can eat gluten-free food. You'll be fine.

Don't eat out. At least until you get the hang of this diet and are confident in yourself enough to demand for gluten-free meals. That took me a long time. I was a mouse when I went out to eat. I just asked for things that I thought might be gluten-free without making a big fuss about it. Now, I am demanding and assertive. I'm paying for it, it should be safe!

Don't eat at relative's houses unless they too have celiac. Relatives can mean well, but they don't have gluten-free cookware. They have wooden spoons, Teflon pans, plastic colanders, etc. Their gluten-free meals are cross contaminated even though they meant well. Bring your own food. Make it a pot-luck. Don't hide in your house, just bring food everywhere you go. If you have sensitive friends and family, they will understand (make sure they know ahead of time that you'll be contributing to the meal). If you have insensitive friends and family, get new friends. :-)

My husband went on deployment in Kuwait in the first gulf war. I know how worried I was. This fear of yours about gluten may be worsened by the worry for your husband... but this won't be very hard. You'll get the hang of it soon.

Good luck.

[K8ling]

The fear of getting glutened subsides after awhile. What's great about being alone is that you can live in a strict, gluten-free household - that way, your chances of getting sick are greatly reduced. Next, figure out some safe meals and stick to them. Rice and chicken? Rice and hamburgers? Rice and ... Your baby can eat gluten-free food. You'll be fine.

Don't eat out. At least until you get the hang of this diet and are confident in yourself enough to demand for gluten-free meals. That took me a long time. I was a mouse when I went out to eat. I just asked for things that I thought might be gluten-free without making a big fuss about it. Now, I am demanding and assertive. I'm paying for it, it should be safe!

Don't eat at relative's houses unless they too have celiac. Relatives can mean well, but they don't have gluten-free cookware. They have wooden spoons, Teflon pans, plastic colanders, etc. Their gluten-free meals are cross contaminated even though they meant well. Bring your own food. Make it a pot-luck. Don't hide in your house, just bring food everywhere you go. If you have sensitive friends and family, they will understand (make sure they know ahead of time that you'll be contributing to the meal). If you have insensitive friends and family, get new friends. :-)

My husband went on deployment in Kuwait in the first gulf war. I know how worried I was. This fear of yours about gluten may be worsened by the worry for your husband... but this won't be very hard. You'll get the hang of it soon.

Good luck.

Thanks for the advice. I am so afraid to eat out right now anyway...this will be my 7th deployment but the longest I have ever had to go through. I'm VERY overwhelmed....hopefully he won't have to go (wishful thinking).

Right now we are strictly gluten free, with the exception of the deployment "sick box" for the baby which has a few cans of chicken noodle soup and crackers in it. The fridge and freezer, as well as both cabinets got cleared out when my husband found out I was allergic to gluten.

I am lucky too that my grandmother is allergic to gluten and I have some very supportive friends who's husbands are also in the same unit, so I won't be totally alone .

[sa1937]

If your hubby gets deployed, do you plan to stay within the military community or "go home" wherever that will be? Military wives have a real camaraderie and take care of their own. I experienced that when my then husband went to VietNam and I stayed in Lawton, OK instead of heading home to Minneapolis. I think that made all the difference in the world to have a closely knit group of friends who shared so many experiences during that year.

Of course, this really has nothing to do with a gluten free diet but if you get together and bring your own food, I think it'll be manageable...not easy, just manageable. And you could have strict control over your gluten free kitchen.

Wishing you the best!!!

[ravenwoodglass]

I know your worried about it but you would really be surprised what we can do when we have to as Moms. You've gotten some great advice already so I don't have too much to add other than to say that things do get easier with time. It sounds like your doing all the right things. As a former military wife myself I know that you likely have a lot of support available if you need it. In a real pinch if you do get glutened and get very, very ill call the chaplins office if your new on base and don't know anyone yet. They could be helpful.

[K8ling]

Thanks, guys. I DO stay here (we own a house and I am in grad school- plus I'd probably strangle myself if I had to live with my parents again lol). I have some very good friends, unfortunately some of the wives are very catty and obnoxious. I try not to be around them very much. I go to the spouse functions, but aside from my very good friends I don't trust the rest of them not to flour me on purpose. You'd think we'd be closer but...nope...

Anyway, things are looking up, now we just play the waiting game. Thanks for all the support, and the chaplain idea, I never thought of that!

[modiddly16]

Don't take any unnecessary risks by eating out if you're really concerned. I rarely eat out as is...even if a place is "gluten-free friendly", I still tend to be a skeptic and I'm 7 years (close) gluten free. There are some days that if I'm traveling or something that I refuse to eat at all...which obviously I don't recommend haha. Just be careful....maybe take on a new hobby of cooking and see if you can become a mini Paula Dean by the time your husband gets back!! Just try to cut back on the butter...Paula loves her butter

[K8ling]

Don't take any unnecessary risks by eating out if you're really concerned. I rarely eat out as is...even if a place is "gluten-free friendly", I still tend to be a skeptic and I'm 7 years (close) gluten free. There are some days that if I'm traveling or something that I refuse to eat at all...which obviously I don't recommend haha. Just be careful....maybe take on a new hobby of cooking and see if you can become a mini Paula Dean by the time your husband gets back!! Just try to cut back on the butter...Paula loves her butter

EVERYTHING is better with butter