Dh Is Ill And His Family Is Blaming My Gluten-Free Diet

[msmini14]

Hi All,

Hope everyone is doing well these days.

So I am curious if anyone has an article stating that the gluten-free diet is okay for others to eat if they don

[YoloGx]

Hi All,

Hope everyone is doing well these days.

So I am curious if anyone has an article stating that the gluten-free diet is okay for others to eat if they don’t have Celiac.

My husband has been ill the last few months, a lot of issues in his mid area and the doctors can’t figure it out. We are very worried now and just want to find out what is wrong with him.

So my sister and mother in law keep telling everyone else in hubby's family that my gluten-free diet is making him sick. My DH has been gluten-free with me for more than two years, by his choice.

We have tried to explain to his family that it is not our diet so now I want to find a legitimate article I can mail to his mom so she will believe us.

It is sad that when you go gluten-free there are some people who support you and others who don’t. The one sister of his has always made snide remarks and looks at me funny when I won’t eat her food. So one day to get her off my back I decided to give her a very detailed explanation of what happens to me when I consume gluten.

So I guess this is kind of a rant too, just bothers me because now all of a sudden there is a problem with what we eat even though no one has ever complained about what I have cooked them. His family is from back east and we are in CA. For 7 days straight I cooked almost two meals a day for 6 people including DH and I so we didn’t have to eat out every other night while they came to visit.

Okay I feel a little bit better. I know a lot of you have had issues like this.

Hi, I can understand your distress. There is so much fear and misunderstanding out there. However as I understand it, a gluten free diet is much healthier in general for nearly everyone. Read the book DANGEROUS GRAINS for corroboration (check Amazon for used copies).

You could however be gluten free (gluten-free) and still eat say too much sugar or fats maybe. If you eat more straight meat, vegetables, non gluten grains, and fruit it should be an excellent diet again for most anyone.

It may be your husband could be sensitive to other foods than you however. It came as a big surprise to me recently for instance that I have a big problem with Salicylic Acid--found not only in aspiring but also in many fruits and vegetables (most notably in the skin). I also have a carrot and nut allergy. Go figure, some of us are made this way. Some people cannot handle fructose. More common allergens are corn, milk and soy. Candida overgrowth is also quite common and can make havoc of someone's health--especially if that someone has had a bunch of antibiotics.

Its more than likely it isn't the diet that is making him ill. It could be some outside contaminant, you never know, or stress, or even genetics or plain lack of exercise and age. Nevertheless its good to check other possible sources of problems, just in case.

But getting sick because of being on a gluten-free diet? Nah! Forget it. It is a diet closer in fact to what our forebears ate and thus is much better for most everyone--even if they might grumble now and then. But as said, do stay away from sugar and prepackaged food as much as possible. That has been shown to be bad for nearly everyone - whether the food is gluten-free or not.

[precious831]

I'm sorry you're going through this. My sis and some family members think I made this whole thing up and don't really believe me and act like I am such an inconvenience to them and definitely a real party pooper! So feel free to rant away!

I don't have an article in mind but I can tell you that he's not sick from being gluten-free, that is just absurd! There's probably some articles here on celiac.com that could be good for them to read. I don't know what's gonna do it though, you've already explained it, it's like beating a dead horse, who's to say they will believe what they read? I did this with my brother and he still didn't believe me! I think it will take time, sadly. My mom seems to be coming around so there is hope.

I hope your husband feels better soon. My DH is grain-free like DD and I for the most part. I do believe he eats stuff with grains sparingly outside of the home. I cook/bake everything. It's an issue when traveling and going to people homes. I ignore the snide remarks but I realize after a while you just want to scream and just get mad. I know I do. Hugs to you!

[Skylark]

I haven't seen an article either, but the safety of a gluten-free diet should be common sense. Would your family be so ridiculous if you went onto a rice-free diet? They must have some sort of agenda to make such a ridiculous assertion.

There are whole continents like North and South America, the Indian Subcontinent, and much of Asia where people did not eat gluten grains until the advent of global transportation. Rice grows better in tropical climates, oats and rye better in cold climates like northern Europe and Russia, and corn was the cultivated grain in the Americas. Wheat and barley are only native grains in the fertile crescent and parts of Asia. It's really sort of ridiculous to assume there is something wrong with a gluten-free diet when you think about it.

Have you considered other food sensitivities in your DH like perhaps dairy, soy, or corn?

[Juliebove]

I don't have a cite or anything. But in reading recent women's magazines, they often recommend a gluten free diet for everyone these days.

[ravenwoodglass]

Even though you are both eating gluten free at home is he eating gluten outside the home? If he is it is possible he needs to be completely gluten free and is reacting to the small amounts that he is eating or drinking outside the home.

As far as the gluten free diet not being good for folks that are not diagnosed with celiac or GI that is ridiculous. Eating whole unprocessed foods is the way man ate for centuries.

[cahill]

If he is totally gluten free ,there may be other intolerance/ allergys that he is noticing now.

A gluten free diet is not going to make him ill,, if he is eating alot of replacement (gluten free) breads,ect those flours may be suspect.Tapioca flour is a no-no for me.

Rant away,I totally understand,,,My two daughters are gluten free and totally supportive .My son ( who is seriously ill and probably celiac )and the rest of MY family thinks i am nuts.I tell them that it is ok if they think I am crazy.Since going gluten free I feel better now than I ever have.

[frieze]

Even though you are both eating gluten free at home is he eating gluten outside the home? If he is it is possible he needs to be completely gluten free and is reacting to the small amounts that he is eating or drinking outside the home.

As far as the gluten free diet not being good for folks that are not diagnosed with celiac or GI that is ridiculous. Eating whole unprocessed foods is the way man ate for centuries.

If they can "blame" it on your diet, they do not have to acknowledge that there child/sibling is potentially very ill......

[NorthernElf]

I agree - definitely absurd...are they trying to say that gluten is necessary for a healthy life ? The human body needs gluten to function ? Gosh - they really are in denial about your diet.

You might wanna get him checked out though - if he's had stomach issues for a few months it sounds like something is going on. Always good to follow it up...

[T.H.]

Oh jeesh - aaarrggh! That's so frustrating. That 'this is different so it MUST be bad' attitude. As though everyone, everywhere in the world must eat the same way? We're omnivores for a reason. We developed as a species eating things when they were IN SEASON and LOCAL. Curiously, wheat doesn't tend to be in season everywhere, at every time. Like in most of South America. Ever.

I guess all the people there really died out and we just never noticed.

But I'd agree that it could be something that has changed since he's gone gluten free. I honestly cannot think of any condition that is made worse by going gluten free, but I can think of a couple things that might show up because of your food choices AFTER going gluten free. They're not caused by the gluten free diet, but they might be detected now.

1 - like was said before, if he happened to have gluten troubles, too, then other issues might be showing up now that he's gluten free. Or he could be reacting to gluten if he eats it outside the home.

2 - What do you eat more of now? If he had a mild allergy or intolerance to something that you rarely ate, but now eat more of on a gluten free diet, that could be it. Potatoes, buckwheat, that sort of thing.

3 - Or, and this might be more likely, he could be having issues with xanthan gum. Unpleasant reactions to xanthan gum (and guar gum, and arabic gum, and any other 'gum') are not uncommon. There's even an article on it here at celiac.com. It says:

Some people develop an allergy to xanthan, with gastrointestinal symptoms such as bloating, gas, and diarrhea. Even consumption of a very minor amount can lead to days and days of recovery and many trips to the bathroom. Hmm. Sound like anything we've heard before? And that's the problem. Experiencing a xanthan reaction can make you question your gluten-free diet, make you think you were accidentally exposed to gluten, or mystify you completely."

xanthan gum sensitivity

We discovered a friend of ours had this, but only because she kept getting sick when she would eat at our house. The gluten-free food had so much more of the xanthan gum that it was noticeable, whereas before, she rarely ran into the substance. You'd find it in the gluten-free breads, crackers, cookies, baking mixes...I think even some of the thickened soups and such. If he just avoided the gum for a week or so, that would probably be enough to see if it's the issue.

I'm honestly hoping that's what it is - so much easier to get better if you just have to avoid a food, rather than taking so many tests and trying to figure out what else it could be. Wishing you the best in your husband's health!

[msmini14]

Thanks for all the responses, I appreciate it.

DH always eats gluten-free, even outside the home. Actually these days if he has gluten he gets sick from it, so he stays away from it now.

Some of his family members understand my diet and others dont want to accept it. Last July his sister continued giving me dirty looks and making remarks about the food we were eating. I decided to give her a detailed explanation of what gluten does to me. BUT she still blames DH's issues on diet, oh well.

I have been thinking he might have developed other intolerances also, but what? He goes in for an endoscopy next Tuesday so I hope they find something. Poor guy has gone through a lot of tests and they cant find anything.

His pain jumps all over his abdomen. Starts in his stomach, then 15 minutes later in his lower gut, then under his ribs. It is constant pain but never in one spot. It has been a huge worry to us. We are hoping for somthing like ulcers, we will see.

Thanks for listening, sometimes it just feels good to complain haha. .

[tarnalberry]

I would have responded with "Uh... yeah. Because eating veggies, fruit, and meat is soooooo awful for you. The human race was on the verge of extinction before wheat was cultivated and all those cultures that don't eat it much at all don't really exist." Followed by an "extreme ignorance induced eye roll". Of course, I can be a PITA sometimes too.

[msmini14]

I would have responded with "Uh... yeah. Because eating veggies, fruit, and meat is soooooo awful for you. The human race was on the verge of extinction before wheat was cultivated and all those cultures that don't eat it much at all don't really exist." Followed by an "extreme ignorance induced eye roll". Of course, I can be a PITA sometimes too.

lol those are my thoughts hehe. Thats what we said to ourselves

[precious831]

Thanks for all the responses, I appreciate it.

DH always eats gluten-free, even outside the home. Actually these days if he has gluten he gets sick from it, so he stays away from it now.

Some of his family members understand my diet and others dont want to accept it. Last July his sister continued giving me dirty looks and making remarks about the food we were eating. I decided to give her a detailed explanation of what gluten does to me. BUT she still blames DH's issues on diet, oh well.

I have been thinking he might have developed other intolerances also, but what? He goes in for an endoscopy next Tuesday so I hope they find something. Poor guy has gone through a lot of tests and they cant find anything.

His pain jumps all over his abdomen. Starts in his stomach, then 15 minutes later in his lower gut, then under his ribs. It is constant pain but never in one spot. It has been a huge worry to us. We are hoping for somthing like ulcers, we will see.

Thanks for listening, sometimes it just feels good to complain haha. .

Has he been tested for food allergies?

About the stomach aches, any other symptoms? Diarrhea maybe? Backpain?

[msmini14]

Has he been tested for food allergies?

About the stomach aches, any other symptoms? Diarrhea maybe? Backpain?

No his BM's have been good. He always has back pain since he was injured overseas. Poor guy has what he calls pressure in his ab area, but like I said it jumps around.

After is appointment tomorrow we are going to ask about testing for food allergies. DH says he has never had a problem and I had to remind him I ate wheat with no problem until late 2007 lol.

So wish us luck, lets hope it is a simple fix.

[kayo]

Once I went gluten free I noticed my symptoms didn't fully go away. I had roaming pain too. I had more tests and found out I had SIBO. I likely had it for years but going gluten-free really highlighted it. I was also tested for fructose malabsorption but that came back negative. Other things to consider: other food allergies, ulcers, colitis, Crohn's, diverticulitis, candida, giardia and other parasites.

Hopefully his endoscopy test helps figure it out.

Last July his sister continued giving me dirty looks and making remarks about the food we were eating. I decided to give her a detailed explanation of what gluten does to me. BUT she still blames DH's issues on diet, oh well.

You don't owe his sister or anyone an explanation. Her eye rolling, her misunderstanding is her problem to solve, not yours. Please don't be burdened by such people. Do your best to ignore them. The more confidence you show in the decisions you make the less flack you'll get from others. When they see they can't bother you with their negativity they give up. Trust me, I speak from experience

[jenngolightly]

I hope your dh is okay. It must be very concerning that he's sick and you don't know what's wrong. Considering this is a new symptom after a few years on the diet, it's a good thing that you're consulting a doctor. Best of luck to you and your husband.

[possiblyglutensensitive]

I think a gluten free diet is always a good thing isn't? since gluten is so hard to break down for the body...

I think his family are just ill educated about diet in general. I see that in my family too. some people think it is plain dumb to question the conventional diet. and then they are ill and wonder why.

it's your body and your husband's body, you are both free-willed, educated adults, you have been hospitable and cooking for them... if they aren't happy, well I guess they can go home.