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This Is All So Overwhelming...


crissy82

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crissy82 Rookie

I am on day six of gluten-free. Although yesterday I am pretty sure I had some gluten in the meal my mother-in-law made me. I have tried going online to different websites to find what has gluten and what doesn't. Everything is so conflicting. So pretty much my diet for 6 days, with the exception of yesterday, has been rice (plain), chex cereal (dry), lettuce, applesauce, bananas and apples.

My family doesn't understand it. We had a family dinner at our house yesterday. My mother in law cooked and made something that had noodles, beef, cabbage, carrots and soy sauce. I told her I could not have the noodles or the soy sauce. Well she brought two kinds of soy sauces. One said on the label it contained wheat. The other one only said it contained soy. Nothing about wheat. But I told her you still have read the ingredients for hidden gluten. Well she didn't listen. She said it should be fine. So she made mine with rice instead of noodles and used the soy sauce that didn't say anything about gluten. I ate it. Just to keep the peace.

I am feeling so down and upset today. I don't know if my family will ever understand. Especially my mother in law. She is all about cooking. I don't know what to eat and what not to eat. I am scared to eat anything with flavor because I read you should avoid a lot of spices and sauces. Is it always going to be like this? :(


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pricklypear1971 Community Regular

I'm sorry you're feeling so down.

There's no reason to avoid sauces and spices if they are gluten-free.

Most spices - pure spices - are gluten-free. Spice BLENDS may contain gluten. Read the label.

Sauces don't always contain gluten - if you make it at home or withgf ingredients it will be gluten-free. If you are eating out, yes, unless you know it's gluten-free don't eat it. Most sauces in a restaurant have a gluten element.

There are gluten-free soy sauces. They are called tamari or gluten-free.

It's hard in the beginning, but keep moving forward. Don't expect it to be perfect.

lindamb296 Newbie

I am on day six of gluten-free. Although yesterday I am pretty sure I had some gluten in the meal my mother-in-law made me. I have tried going online to different websites to find what has gluten and what doesn't. Everything is so conflicting. So pretty much my diet for 6 days, with the exception of yesterday, has been rice (plain), chex cereal (dry), lettuce, applesauce, bananas and apples.

My family doesn't understand it. We had a family dinner at our house yesterday. My mother in law cooked and made something that had noodles, beef, cabbage, carrots and soy sauce. I told her I could not have the noodles or the soy sauce. Well she brought two kinds of soy sauces. One said on the label it contained wheat. The other one only said it contained soy. Nothing about wheat. But I told her you still have read the ingredients for hidden gluten. Well she didn't listen. She said it should be fine. So she made mine with rice instead of noodles and used the soy sauce that didn't say anything about gluten. I ate it. Just to keep the peace.

I am feeling so down and upset today. I don't know if my family will ever understand. Especially my mother in law. She is all about cooking. I don't know what to eat and what not to eat. I am scared to eat anything with flavor because I read you should avoid a lot of spices and sauces. Is it always going to be like this? :(

Do you have an iPhone? I did when I first was diagnosed. I bought a $1.99 app called Is that Gluten Free? I looked up everything, including spices, sauces, etc. Eventually I learned what is and isn't okay to eat and/or drink. I also QUICKLY learned not to let ANY of the know it alls tell me what I can and can't eat or drink. Just say NO, especially to your mother-in-law.

Don't rely on the Internet and/or a "nutritionist" or "dietitian" unless they have a medical degree of some sort. I went to one and she didn't even know what gluten was.

Good Luck, and keep your chin up. It takes up to a year to learn all the ropes.

Monklady123 Collaborator

I am on day six of gluten-free. Although yesterday I am pretty sure I had some gluten in the meal my mother-in-law made me. I have tried going online to different websites to find what has gluten and what doesn't. Everything is so conflicting. So pretty much my diet for 6 days, with the exception of yesterday, has been rice (plain), chex cereal (dry), lettuce, applesauce, bananas and apples.

My family doesn't understand it. We had a family dinner at our house yesterday. My mother in law cooked and made something that had noodles, beef, cabbage, carrots and soy sauce. I told her I could not have the noodles or the soy sauce. Well she brought two kinds of soy sauces. One said on the label it contained wheat. The other one only said it contained soy. Nothing about wheat. But I told her you still have read the ingredients for hidden gluten. Well she didn't listen. She said it should be fine. So she made mine with rice instead of noodles and used the soy sauce that didn't say anything about gluten. I ate it. Just to keep the peace.

I am feeling so down and upset today. I don't know if my family will ever understand. Especially my mother in law. She is all about cooking. I don't know what to eat and what not to eat. I am scared to eat anything with flavor because I read you should avoid a lot of spices and sauces. Is it always going to be like this? :(

It is hard at the beginning, but it doesn't have to be. The easiest thing to remember is that the ONLY things you have to avoid on a gluten free diet are wheat, barley, and rye (and oats if they're not certified gluten free, because of cross contamination). Everything else in its natural state is gluten free. Meat, vegetables, fruit, beans, legumes, dairy, potatoes, rice, coffee (thank goodness!), chocolate (yay! but read the label). Etc. Everything. So if you can do your own cooking, and don't use processed food, then you'll be fine.

Now of course the minute you add in families, or eating out, or potlucks, or work stuff...well then it's more difficult. There you just have to be firm, or bring your own, or whatever works.

But for your own cooking in your own house it shouldn't be too difficult. Now if you're like me and hate to cook....well that's where your learning curve will be. :P

And for the families, like your MIL, it's a process of re-education. Hopefully they'll listen and learn. Sadly a lot of them don't, as you'll read on this forum. :(

But browse through this forum, and also the ones about food and cooking, and the baking one. Also the restaurant one can be helpful. (well they're all helpful, but those I mentioned are best for people just starting out, I think.)

dani nero Community Regular

If the soy sauce didn't say it contains wheat or gluten then perhaps it was gluten-free? :-)

Cheer up, I think you're doing great. We all have family members who are stubborn, it's because they want to see everyone enjoy food. My aunt tried forcing me to eat a piece of chicken that was laying on a piece of bread once. It was a horrifying experience because she looked like she was going to get upset and I really didn't want to upset her. This is YOUR well-being, however, and you need to look after it. Perhaps call in advance next time and ask if there are any specific ingredients that you would need to bring yourself, so that (for example) you'd bring your own guaranteed gluten-free soy next time!

Relax and don't worry. What I did when I first started was that I kept the unsafe foods list that is provided by this website on my mobile phone, so I would have it with me everywhere I went. Reading labels is something that becomes second nature to you later so don't worry. Enjoy the fact that you're going to feel well from now on :-)

psawyer Proficient

If wheat is present in a food sold in the US, or in Canada, then that fact must be clearly disclosed on the label using the word "wheat."

raea2002 Apprentice

Good luck. I'm on week 4 of Gluten-Free and understand your struggles and frustrations. I have found gluten free for dummies to be helpful by Donna Korn. Also gluten free on a shoestring by Nicole Hunn, and a grocery store guide so you can look up in a flash what is Gluten-Free in the store. I don't have a smartphone. Hang in there. It gets easier. Let me know if you need anymore tips.


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sharilee Rookie

I know it is overwhelming, I have been gluten free for two months. And I am still learning what I can and cannot have. It does get easier. When I was first diagnosed with celiac, I printed off the forbidden list that was available here at celiac.com and took with me to the store and checked ingredients with it. Now I am able to recognize most of the hidden ingredients without referring to my list. As for family understanding, I think the key is education. As we are educating ourselves, we also need to educate our family and friends.

IrishHeart Veteran

May I offer you a list of unsafe/safe foods, sources of hidden gluten, etc. all in one place?

I felt the same way you did at first--overwhelmed !!--and when I wanted to inform my family, I gathered it all together and wrote it out.

Eventually, I put everything I learned into one thread:

Also, there are FAQs--frequently asked questions--- at the top of every section and included there are lists of safe/unsafe foods, how to read labels etc.

To help your MIL understand, you may wish to print off some of this info she can learn. Everyone is new at this (you and your family) and it is easy to get frustrated, I know. But everyone can learn. :)

Even my 85- year- old Mom adapted and is gluten-free herself. :)

I recommend San-J Organic Tamari Gluten Free Soy Sauce. Buy some for yourself and MIL.

Also, get a copy of Cecelia's Marketplace gluten-free Grocery guide.

(all this info is in that thread)

Hope this helps! best wishes!

Bubba's Mom Enthusiast

At least your MIL tried? There is gluten-free soy sauce. If you got a gluten reaction, it's more likely that she may have used the same spoon to stir both versions of the dish as she cooked them without realizing it? If she did, she probably didn't even think of it.

When I was first DXed I made both gluten and gluten-free versions of foods like pasta. I caught myself just in time as I was going to test if the pasta was done by biting into it. :o I don't make mixed meals any more.

Try to stick with naturally gluten-free whole foods at first. Fruitsm veggies, meats, seafood, eggs, and dairy if you tolerate it.

I also recommend a food log. Write down what you eat. Make a note of any symptoms you may have. This will help you if you are reacting to another food. Some of us find we have second intolerances which were masked by the gluten. If I were you, I'd watch for reactions to soy. That may be what you reacted to in the dish rather than gluten?

It's hard when you're first starting out. You don't have to give up seasonings if they don't irritate your system. Read labels though!

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