How To Stop Cheating

[italiana1981]

I was diagnosed in March-and cannot stop cheating. I have not been able to go two to three weeks without eating gluten.

I am in Italy right now travelling, and took a 4 day trip to Rome by myself (I am staying in Italy with Family). During my trip to Rome, I fell off the gluten free wagon big time!

My family knows about my Celiac disease, so when I go back to stay with them today, I wil have to get off gluten again. I have never eaten this much gluten (2 days in a row eating bread!) since being diagnosed. i am totally hooked again-it is such an addiction.

Any advice for how to get back on the wagon? I know I have to just DO IT and not think about it.

[gfp]

Sorry but I think you will find the answer inside yourself.

Firstly I think you might need the help of your family and to do this you need to tell them you have been cheating.

Gluten is addictive as you know and breaking it can be as hard as any drug.

What I would recommend, especailly in summer is to drop the gluten-substitute foods like gluten-free bread and pasta etc. until you are past the hump. You could buy sme nice gluten-free pasta as a interim treat barolla make some decent stuff.... but keep this as your reward.

Each time you eat gluten it is just setting you up for the next fall, you need to get past this.

I would recommend sticking strictly to fresh meat/veg and fruit for a few weeks. Heck your in the garden of the world even if it is wheat dominated. Take this time as a purging of the toxin/drug from your system and then at the end take your treat (gluten-free pasta or pizza etc.) as your reward.

[Guest cassidy]

I agree that there is a reason that you keep poisoning yourself.

I respect my body and I want to feel my best and be healthy. I don't see anything containing gluten as a temptation. I almost see all of it as poison and I can't wait to wash my hands when I have touch something containing gluten.

I don't know how you can get yourself to that point. Is there some reason why you aren't taking this seriously? Do you feel bad when you eat guten? Do you realize the consequences of not sticking on this diet? Are you angry?

There are several grief stages that people go through. If you are having a hard time accepting things, a good therapist can help you work through it. Unfortunally, if you are unwilling or unable to figure out why you are perpetuating this self-destructive behavior, then you will keep doing it. There are also good books out there if you like to read.

I hope you figure out why you are cheating and work through it. A gluten free lifestyle takes some time, but there are plenty of things to eat. This website is a great support system, I hope it helps you.

[mouse]

I am sorry that you are having such a hard time going totally gluten-free. I have read that gluten is extremely addictive and it has been compared to a morphine addiction. I did not have any withdrawal symptoms, but at the time of my diagnosis I had been unable to even stop throwing up a sip of water (9 days of this) and then the month preceding I had been unable to keep much food in my system. So, I would gather that I got thru the addiction part because of being so sick. I would not wish what I went thru on my worst enemy. You are young and I would hate to think of you getting all the auto immune diseases that I have now been diagnosed with, because you had not found a way to overcome the addiction. Do you someday want to have children? Then maybe that thought would help you to stick to the diet. If you want to have an uncomplecated pregnancy then you need to have your small intestine completely heal and that takes time. I wish I had more advice, but maybe someone else will post here that went thru what you are going thru. I wish you the best of luck as it is doable.

[Guest nini]

gluten foods are extremely addictive. How I keep myself from ever even being tempted to cheat is by telling myself that gluten in any form is POISON! Poison Poison Poison... I just repeat that over and over like a mantra... now I would never intentionally eat poison so if gluten = poison in my mind then I won't even be tempted... sure I miss certain foods and it was really hard to break the addiction, but you have to do it and with this addiction especially the only way to stop is cold turkey, and just deal with the withdrawal symptoms... You can help yourself through this process by finding some gluten-free treat that you really really love (for me it's chocolate) and whenever you are tempted, eat your treat food instead. (yeah I've developed a rather painful cavity but I've broken the gluten habit! )

[tarnalberry]

While I was never horribly sick at all, I don't think there's any secret, any tricky, or any special technique. You just do it.

Remember that YOU are the one who is in control over what you eat. You make the decision to pick the food and accept the food that you shouldn't have. You control the muscles in your arms that pick up the food which is put in your mouth. It's a decision every step of the way, and you have a number of chances to correct that decision.

Perhaps you're just going for the instant gratification, perhaps you're not being mindful of your decisions, perhaps you're in denial, perhaps you don't believe that you have to be strict about the diet, perhaps you just haven't gotten in the habit of making those decisions, perhaps you're worried about feeling abnormal above all else... perhaps a lot of things. Sit down and think about why you're making this decision. If you're not used to analyzing your thought process (including your subconscious thought process) like this, consider talking to a counselor (I know that seems like a rash suggestion, but beyond helping you through a problem, they can help you think about your thinking, which is useful in all of life's problems - kinda like someone teaching you how to use power tools while they teach you to build a house). But somehow, figure out why you're making the decision to feed yourself poison (albeit a mild one), and work from there.

[BRUMI1968]

Sometimes, metaphors help. One I use:

If life is a journey, which I think we could say it is, at least in the terms of time and movement and experience and the like, then your body is the vehicle with which you take this journey.

I would rather go on a long roadtrip in a finely tuned volvo or mercedes than my old 76 chevette with four cylinders (sometimes) and rusty panels.

I look at my body like the temple that houses my consciousness, my soul/spirit/energy/aura, my mind, my emotions, my everything. It is a house or car or whatever that contains these things and allows them to be safe and free and expansive and introspective.

If my body/house/car is malfunctioning, or functioning at less than optmal, then my life experiences are less than optimal. You can easily see this when you think about not feeling well at a party, or getting elevation sickness when going mountainclimbing - the experience is dulled or manipulated by unwellness.

So, everything I do, from big things like choosing not to drink alcohol to small things like putting on lotion, I actually imagine myself nurturing my temple so that my life experiences can be optimal.

Sounds a bit new agey, I know....works for me. Thought I'd pass it on.

[Green12]

I was diagnosed in March-and cannot stop cheating. I have not been able to go two to three weeks without eating gluten.

I am in Italy right now travelling, and took a 4 day trip to Rome by myself (I am staying in Italy with Family). During my trip to Rome, I fell off the gluten free wagon big time!

My family knows about my Celiac disease, so when I go back to stay with them today, I wil have to get off gluten again. I have never eaten this much gluten (2 days in a row eating bread!) since being diagnosed. i am totally hooked again-it is such an addiction.

Any advice for how to get back on the wagon? I know I have to just DO IT and not think about it.

My approach to this would be, stop looking back, what's done is done, let it go and focus on looking forward. You made a mistake and fell off the wagon, just get up and get right back on and move ahead. I agree you need to do this for yourself and the strength is there, maybe you just have something blocking it.

I personally did the opposite of what gfp suggested. I found it helpful for me to go out the first few weeks of going gluten free and find every gluten free product I could to taste and try out. It took a few days for me to realize gluten substitutes actually did taste pretty good and you don't have to feel deprived of anything. Once I made this connection I knew it was a totally doable way of eating.

I notice in your signature you are just a few months into being diagnosed. I can't imagine being in Italy where there are all those great restaurants, pasta and bread galore, it's probably a gluten paradise! 3 months doesn't seem like enough time to perfect a gluten-free diet and plan ahead for your time traveling. It's challenging enough to figure it all out at home, I can't imagine being out of the country or away from home.

Instead of focusing on the bread and the pasta, maybe explore what Italy has to offer as far as meats, fruits, vegetables, and herbs- I would think there would be some delicious stuff.

Good luck to you

[lorka150]

your signature says: "I love how it feels to be clean and free of gluten and casein so I can really live!"

re-inforce that to yourself.

personally, nothing tastes as good as being healthy feels.

[2kids4me]

Even though Italy is known for its pasta - it is also known as world leader in the early diagnosis of celiac disease:

In Italy, where celiac disease is common, all children are screened by age 6 so that even asymptomatic disease is caught early. In addition, Italians of any age are tested for the disease as soon as they show symptoms. As a result of this vigilance, the time between when symptoms begin and the disease is diagnosed is usually only 2 to 3 weeks.

That should mean that chefs in Italy would be aware fo the disease and that gluten-free products would be easily available - at least that would be the logical assumption.

[Nancym]

Read the book "Dangerous Grains", that should motivate you.

[kbtoyssni]

It might also help if you don't think of it in the same way people traditionally think of a "diet". When you say "diet" people think of self-imposed restriction, that they really shouldn't eat something but if they do the worst that happens is they don't lose any weight this week. This is not the same type of diet. This is a medical issue. Do you want to keep eating things if they literally are killing you? If you were diabetic would you eat sugar all the time and forget to take your insulin? My mindset has always been that "cheating" doesn't exist. I go gluten-free, I get my life back. I eat gluten, I go back to being too sick to get out of bed and eventually die. For me it doesn't ever seem like a choice. It's just something I do.

I'm not sure if this helps at all. It seems like you are in a very different place in terms of relating to the diesase than I am, so what worked for me may not work for you.

[Rusla]

Italiana, if you have not suffered enough it is your god given right to suffer more.

I have never cheated, because unfortunately a few loose crumbs from someone elses food will make me sick if they get onto my hands etc. I remember the pain and what I go through with a few crumbs, I don't find the need to suffer more.

Obviously everyone reacts differently and I am sure if you ended up with leper skin and what I get, you probably would think twice about cheating. It is your decision to make and your choice to quit or not.

[lorka150]

someone on here in their signature has the tagline: "nothing tastes as good as healthy feels". [or similar] best way to describe this situation, i think.

[Daxin]

I have also been tempted. My blood work only came back SCREAMING positive 3 weeks ago, and the diet change has helped a lot.

It feels to me much the way it did when I quit smoking 3 years ago. It is hard to stop doing somehting that, in the case of gluten, I have been ingesting my whole life. It seems somedays that there is not enough will power in the universe to help me cope. I had to WANT to quit smoking, and now I HAVE TO WANT to stop eating gluten.

It helps me a lot to read the posts from thousands of people like me and know that I am not suffering in silence.

I have drawn inspiration from my fellow celiacs, and maybe you can too.

Hang in there.

[sdsdsm1971]

Hey,

I really understand where you are coming from. I was diagnosed in 1996 -- actually I was hospilized for a couple days while they did biopsy and iv'ed me vitamins. I had lost some weight and was having a lot of D and was tired and pale. I had never heard of anyone having this -- it sucked. I was pretty diligent about the diet for like a year. Then came Christmas and I had some cookies, well a lot of cookies. Nothing really happened. So I had some pizza. Nothing really happened.

I started to cheat all the time. Over the years it has waxed and wained symptom wise. I was in denial, I actually said things like, "I think I've outgrown it." I went through two healthy pregnancies and actually thought my symptoms totally subsided during the pregnancies. What a joke.

I read a couple months ago that undiagnosed celiacs have a higher rate of cancers of the small intestine. I did additional research on this and had the ultimate aha! moment. I finally get it. I am racked with guilt that I have been doing so much damage to my body for the last ten years -- sort of knowingly. The power of denial is a strong thing.

Look - for me it was my children. I want to grow old for them and have the energy to chase them around. I have been 100% on a gluten free diet for 6 weeks now. I started it on my 35th biurthday. I thought, I am going to give myself the gift of health. I feel amazing. I've dropped ten pounds -- because I am eating healthier and not so bloated. I feel like I am being true to my body and it has been very powerful for me.

That said, those ten years of cheating happened. At some level I knew better, but it took the cancer threat to really reach me. Maybe everybody has something they are super afraid of and you get scared straight. Do you want cancer? I think it would suck so I stopped eating bread. Figure out what aspect of this condition scares the crap out of you and focus on that.

Good luck -- I have sure been there and I know it is hard.

[emcmaster]

I'm jealous that you can cheat and not be miserably sick.

If I get even a trace amount of gluten, I'm so painfully and severely bloated that I literally look like I'm 7 or 8 months pregnant. I feel nauseous and sick and (unsurprisingly) none of my clothes, save the maternity clothes I bought before I was diagnosed, fit.

I will never cheat because I feel too sick when I have gotten glutened.

[Green12]

I'm jealous that you can cheat and not be miserably sick.

If I get even a trace amount of gluten, I'm so painfully and severely bloated that I literally look like I'm 7 or 8 months pregnant. I feel nauseous and sick and (unsurprisingly) none of my clothes, save the maternity clothes I bought before I was diagnosed, fit.

I will never cheat because I feel too sick when I have gotten glutened.

I think it is hard for those of us who don't get sick or for those of us who don't have clear obvious signs or symptoms from the ingestion of gluten. I know for me I find it difficult to make a mental connection to something being harmful and deadly to my body when those physical symptoms are not present.

[lorka150]

i wouldn't be jealous at all! frankly, i'm glad i get sick, because then i am aware of the damage that is going on. getting cross contaminated and doing damage without knowing would be horrible.

[Green12]

i wouldn't be jealous at all! frankly, i'm glad i get sick, because then i am aware of the damage that is going on. getting cross contaminated and doing damage without knowing would be horrible.

Exactly my thoughts lorka! I wish I did get sick then I would know that gluten was harmful for me, and I could tell if I got glutened or not.

[nikki-uk]

I think it is hard for those of us who don't get sick or for those of us who don't have clear obvious signs or symptoms from the ingestion of gluten. I know for me I find it difficult to make a mental connection to something being harmful and deadly to my body when those physical symptoms are not present.

My husband is in the same boat as you!

He doesn't have very clear symptoms of being glutened,and he has now admitted it would be easier if he did.

When my hubbie was first dx (biopsy) he was in serious denial!

He couldn't believe something so common in everyones diet and something he ate everyday could make him so sick -and believe me he was sick.He was so weak he was bedridden,and had lost a frightening amount of weight,but D was never really a big issue for him.

When,after starting the diet he didn't feel any better after a few weeks he decided that the docs had got it wrong and he was going to eat a toasted cheese sandwich.

He got absolutely no reaction at all,which made it all the harder for me to keep him on the diet.

It was then that I researched celiac disease-found you guys (and another celiac disease board in theU.K) and got the measure of how very serious this was.

I explained to him-nothing else could have caused his villous atrophy,and I was notin any way going to sit by and let him die of small bowel lymphoma!(tough love I suppose!)

Unfortunately for hubbie his villi have been unresponsive to the G.F diet and he's had to have a course of steroids,but I'm hoping when he next has a biopsy it will show some improvement as his health has improved alot.He's put (some) weight back on and has some quality of life back.

I must of done his head in always banging on about sticking to the diet,push,push,push all the time,but you know what?I think I finally got through to him.The other day he said

''I am actually starting to believe that I'm a coeliac now''

LOL!! Alleluia!!.

[Kris Fisher]

You will find the strength in yourself soon. Just believe in your inner strength. When I told my co-workers that I was diagnosed with celiac and then explained what I wouldn't beable to eat one lady said you might as well kill yourself! It just goes to show you who has the strength and who will never have it.

Kris