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The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

TriticusToxicum

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elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:

NOBODY, but NOBODY, has ever managed to be funnier than the Monty Python gang. Nikki, you Brits are the most humoUrous individuals on the planet.

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DingoGirl Enthusiast
DingoGirl
Posted
Aww...SusieQ- no lecture from me...just concern and a hug :wub: :wub: :wub: I hope the reaction doesn't last too long and that Nikki and I can fly out there soon to slap you around with a wet fish :P:o I LOVE that expression! And the dunce cap.

:lol: looking forward to my fish slap!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:lol: I think that's called an LSD tab :o

:lol: or......an out-of-body experience......and dang, those are just NEVER as fun as you hope they'd be. :lol: :lol:

Bev!!! Warm cider doUGHnuts?????????????????? WTH are those??? OMG - - good thing they're not around and I"ve never heard of them, might continue cheating binge today................... :ph34r:

Open Original Shared Linkis for Susie ;)

:lol: 17 seconds of utter mirth and bemusement. :lol:

*******************

OMG - - feeling quite good today. :huh: Feeling utterly fine. Has my gut healed? Although - last time I cheated, over a year ago - - there was a significant delayed reaction - pain got worse and worse over the days until TOXIC EMISSIONS OF ALL KINDS ensued......................... :ph34r:

going to do a bit of yard work, me thinks.

CARRY ON MY LOVELY SILLIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Darn210 Enthusiast
Darn210
Posted
Open Original Shared Linkis for Susie ;)

I do so love Monty Python. Dad used to watch it every week way back when there was only one TV in a house and you had to watch whatever Dad wanted to watch . . . guess his appreciation rubbed off.

Susie, don't let this happen to you . . .

Open Original Shared Link

More Monty Python - It's gross - Will that make you watch it? May Offend?

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted
I do so love Monty Python. Dad used to watch it every week way back when there was only one TV in a house and you had to watch whatever Dad wanted to watch . . . guess his appreciation rubbed off.

Man not only did we have one TV it only had about 6-7 channels. No remote even....boy are we spoiled today.

DingoGirl Enthusiast
DingoGirl
Posted
More Monty Python - It's gross - Will that make you watch it? May Offend?

OMG - OMG - - :lol: haven't seen that one in years. an all-time fave. Definitely gross, did not offend. Of course, your words of titillation FORCED me to have to watch it. :lol:

Man not only did we have one TV it only had about 6-7 channels. No remote even....boy are we spoiled today.

ah, THOSE WERE THE DAYS!!!! I was at my friend's house watching GIGANTIC screen multi-speaker home stereo system......there were no less than six remotes on the table, and about 55,000 channels......(there was also a remote for an oscillating fan)......and I just crack up every time I'm there, because, as I told them, I could live in taht house for the REST of my life and not ONCE ever be able to simply turn on the TV and watch a show....I gave a demonstration for the two teenage boys about the beautiful simplicity of how life USED to be......simply walking over, and changing to one of the five channels, and then sitting back down on the couch.......bribery was often used to get one's little brother to get up and change the channel (that was my remote :lol: )

they were dumbfounded.......

ah.....I so miss the days when all you had was one tv, no remotes.....a toaster......maybe some wacky giant stero........kitchen appliances.....and a phone, no machine, and you only could talk to someone IN PERSON or if you were actually HOME to receive the call................

:lol: :lol: :lol:

okay so all this is reminding me that I must WALK AWAY from thie evil computer, enjoy my very surprising sense of well-being today, and get out and do some yard work.

:P

p.s. Janet your kids are SO CUTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I did love that close up/self portrait of the eye, though :lol:

tom Contributor
tom
Posted
Ptaum! :o You have GOT to EAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you must be getting dangerously thin by now....

My little problem was detailed on OMG. Didn't feel much like eating for a few days, but I'm back to eating what I should now. (Tsu-tze thinks I have an eating problem? :P ) Tho 30-some under my old weight, still 20 over my low.

... I NEED a good lecture, and a slap!!!

Tom doesn't have a lecture handy, but where's the line form for the other?? :D

Curiously, there was a delayed reaction....

Now that IS curious that it's different. <rubs chin>

such an EEEEEEEJIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <slapping self in forehead>

<slapping dingy in back of head>

(sorry...guess I should be spelling it gor-juss)

:lol:

But oops - I forgot to highlight the Ned in FoeNEDdikull, which keeps w/ Giah-knit's next level of including proper name's in the phonetic typing. (HeLarryUs!)

So, I'd go w/ "gor-Jess" !! :lol:;)

And on a sidenote - I think I've proven once again that tequila & 2am email access don't mix. :ph34r::lol:<_<

nikki-uk Enthusiast
nikki-uk
Posted
ah.....I so miss the days when all you had was one tv, no remotes.....a toaster......maybe some wacky giant stero........kitchen appliances.....and a phone, no machine, and you only could talk to someone IN PERSON or if you were actually HOME to receive the call................

WHAT??? A Phone???? :huh: ........didn't even know what one was.... :lol: (well had to walk to the phonebox) AND we had 3 channels in the UK (I remember black & white!!!!!!!!)

In fact...it WAS likeOpen Original Shared Link:lol:

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tom Contributor
tom
Posted
Anyways, last night I found myself dutifully eating a banana, and yes, it's true...I did NOT know where to look. :rolleyes:

I think I must need to read back. Is "eating a banana" a euphemism? :blink:

P.S. :lol:

nikki-uk Enthusiast
nikki-uk
Posted
I think I must need to read back. Is "eating a banana" a euphemism? :blink:

P.S. :lol:

Part of one of my posts (Post #2619) 'Suprisingly true' :lol: .....dare ye go back Tom??? ....You may never find your way out ........ :huh:

tom Contributor
tom
Posted
:lol: I think that's called an LSD tab :o

:lol: :lol: :lol:

OMG - - feeling quite good today. :huh: Feeling utterly fine. Has my gut healed? . . . .

. . . . .going to do a bit of yard work, me thinks.

Incredible! :) I can't imagine how this is possible! :)

Open Original Shared Link

<spew!> blechhhh! I remember that bit well enough I don't need youtube to visualize it.

DingoGirl Enthusiast
DingoGirl
Posted

Um, feeling fabulous, and utterly flummoxed about it.

:huh:

anywho, found this, that food tart Giada:

Open Original Shared Link

kinda silly! :P

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted
WHAT??? A Phone???? :huh: ........didn't even know what one was.... :lol: (well had to walk to the phonebox) AND we had 3 channels in the UK (I remember black & white!!!!!!!!)

In fact...it WAS likeOpen Original Shared Link:lol:

My mom said she used to have a party line. I cannot even imagine that. I do remember my first computer...It was a Tandy, we used to play games on it. There was this neat game called Springster. By todays standards it was way out of date. :)

DingoGirl Enthusiast
DingoGirl
Posted
My mom said she used to have a party line. I cannot even imagine that. I do remember my first computer...It was a Tandy, we used to play games on it. There was this neat game called Springster. By todays standards it was way out of date. :)

:lol: Party line!!! that is so funny. I think we had one at the ancient cabin in Big Sur, many decades ago.....not sure.......it's all hazy....

update on cheating binge.

A MOST curious day. HUGE spurt of energy. Scrubbed, on hands and knees, three floors today - two bathrooms and the kitchen. Scrubbed appliances, cupboards, part of the refrigerator, entry way....many things. A veritable dervish of glutenized energy. :huh: Felt FABULOUS all day.

Now - - friend has just left........feeling a distinct pain in lower gut......extreme tenderness......

:huh:

stay tuned.

wait - - -

Did EMILY say she CHEATS once a year????????????????????????????????????

and - - -am I not mistaken - - - our dear JULIE dropped by earlier??? :)

and - didn't someone else out of the ordinary make a pop-in (or - poop-in as we like to call it)? Was it Donna? had some wine w/ friend - can't remember - - :ph34r:

Having a love surge for all of you (that's the wine talking, folks :P)

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted
:) I didn't cheat but I did a lot of cleaning and scrubbing today...and I am I still doing my work (actual job work) I even managed in a dinner at chili's and some grocery shopping.
Darn210 Enthusiast
Darn210
Posted
p.s. Janet your kids are SO CUTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I did love that close up/self portrait of the eye, though :lol:

Thanks, thanks, thanks. I actually got a PM from someone complimenting me on that one. I PM'd her back and told her it was my son's work. She said he was a natural. So, I'll throw some of his other work in once in a while and you guys can be the judge when you see the pictures of the trash bin in our minivan, the out of focus orange "that looks soooo good" but he won't eat it, the TV with his favorite show on, the case that holds his camera, and yes, he has taken a picture of his bum.

In fact...it WAS likeOpen Original Shared Link:lol:

And little did they know, THEY had it good!!!! Why, when I was young . . .

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Incredible! :) I can't imagine how this is possible! :)

<spew!> blechhhh! I remember that bit well enough I don't need youtube to visualize it.

It takes me back to some friends in high school . . . they could do the whole bit . . . very well . . . very often . . . too often . . . OK, sometimes, they were down right annoying with it . . . Aahhh, memories.

My mom said she used to have a party line. . .

Grandma and Grandpa had one. Sometimes you had to wait for the neighbors to get off the phone so you could take a turn . . . totally forgot all about that.

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted

You know the friends I had in high school are either in jail or just druggies with no brains. There is only two of my friends that made something of themselves, one who is living down by me and another who decided to go to school out of state. Sometimes I wish I was back in school, things were so much easier then....but you know things were not so "Easy" there either when I sit down and think about it. It was not easy being the girl who parents had rules.

tom Contributor
tom
Posted

My ongoing day:

All the stress of moving day w/out any of MY stuff getting moved.

On the bright side, I DID run into an old girlfriend, from 17-18yrs ago, at a chance stop at a gas station! :)

(Willow Glen Rotten Robbie, for those in the know)

nikki-uk Enthusiast
nikki-uk
Posted
It was not easy being the girl who parents had rules.

OMG...You too???? ...HEINOUS !!! :lol:

nikki-uk Enthusiast
nikki-uk
Posted
Now - - friend has just left........feeling a distinct pain in lower gut......extreme tenderness......

Tin hats have been distributed just in case :ph34r:

Did EMILY say she CHEATS once a year????????????????????????????????????

I know !!! She SO thought that little confession went unoticed !!!!

EMILY !!!! If you get caught you will also get the wet fish treatment

and yes, he has taken a picture of his bum.

Naturally... as ALL budding (male) photographers have.

My ongoing day:

All the stress of moving day w/out any of MY stuff getting moved.

Heinous <_<

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted
I know !!! She SO thought that little confession went unoticed !!!!

EMILY !!!! If you get caught you will also get the wet fish treatment

Man, I thought that little 'fession was buried well enough within my colourful blathering... :ph34r: (Incidentally, this little emoticon I have just used has always confounded me. I have come to deduce that it must suggest a guilty admission, but visually it just doesn't seem to fit. It would be perfect for a moment where you are about to speak about your secret wish to conduct an armed robbery, or to become a hockey goalie, or an oppressed Afghani woman). . .

In my own defence, I have to say that I NEVER cheat on the diabetic food regimen. But, maybe once a year when I feel my blood sugar slipping, I will quickly grab one of the kids' pieces of licorice instead of a glucose tablet. THERE! I've not only confessed, I've elaborated on said digression. Ahhh...so freeing... :ph34r: (No goalie dreams for me)!

Darn210 Enthusiast
Darn210
Posted
My ongoing day:

All the stress of moving day w/out any of MY stuff getting moved.

LouDeeChris!!! :angry: . . . . . :lol:

Now - - friend has just left........feeling a distinct pain in lower gut......extreme tenderness......

SooZee, how are you doing today? Can you crawl to the computer to reply? :unsure: Do you need a bucket? Or have you decided to paint all the rooms and steam clean the carpets? :P

NoGluGirl Contributor
NoGluGirl
Posted

Dear Everyone,

I found this and thought you would all find it amusing as well. These laws are from Texas. I knew there were some insane ones out there. I really thought they were hilarious! :lol: I am going to hunt up more!

A city ordinance states that a person cannot go barefoot without first obtaining a special five-dollar permit.

In Dennison it is illegal for a woman to adjust her stockings in public. Doing so can result in up to a year of jail time.

It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.

It is Texas law that when two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone. In one of those "true facts" books there was an explanation for this law. It seems that one of the state senators did not want a law passed. To keep this particular law from passing, he attached the train law to it. He hoped that his fellow senators would discover the train law attached, see how ridiculous it was, and not pass the laws. Nobody saw the the train law attached and passed both laws. This may not be the real reason, but it sounds good. And it might explain some of the laws we have to live with.

In Texas, no one other than a registered pharmacist may sell condoms or other kinds of contraceptives "on the street or other public places." Not even Physicians! Anyone one who tries to make a few extra bucks doing this will be severely prosecuted for the dire act of "unlawfully practicing medicine."

A recently passed anti-crime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed...

In Lefors, it is illegal to take more than three swallows of beer at any time while standing.

In San Antonio, it is illegal for both sexes to flirt or respond to flirtation using the eyes and/or hands.

A resolution was passed in 1971 honoring the Boston Strangler. Odd but 100% true as confimred by Snopes.com

Sincerely,

Jin

P.S. Hi tom, Emily, Susie Q, Bev, Janet, and everyone else! :)

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted

In some state it is allowed by law for women to go into public topless....I am assuming it is not in Texas ;)

Darn210 Enthusiast
Darn210
Posted

Hi Jin,

:lol::lol: espeSHELLY,

A recently passed anti-crime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed...

That would really be helpful . . . maybe more states should do that . . . and you know, eventually, there would be at least one criminal that would do it.

DingoGirl Enthusiast
DingoGirl
Posted
So, I'll throw some of his other work in once in a while and you guys can be the judge when you see the pictures of the trash bin in our minivan, the out of focus orange "that looks soooo good" but he won't eat it, the TV with his favorite show on, the case that holds his camera, and yes, he has taken a picture of his bum.

:lol:

can't wait for those!

THERE! I've not only confessed, I've elaborated on said digression. Ahhh...so freeing... (No goalie dreams for me)!

:huh: that's IT? a single piece of licorice? shoot, that ain't nuthin! (BTW I have seen wheat-free black licorice in lots of places!!) Ho-hum, your cheating does not interest me. :lol: :lol:

SooZee, how are you doing today? Can you crawl to the computer to reply? Do you need a bucket? Or have you decided to paint all the rooms and steam clean the carpets?

Um...........still feeling fabulous.....

:huh:

and completely flummoxed by the whole thing.............. :huh:

and yes, I AM about to steam-clean the carpets!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (well, except that just recently, there is talk of my mom replacing the horrid dingo-trampled carpets :angry: and PAYING for laminate flooring (parents own this house) in the major parts of my little abode!!!!!!!!!! nothing would please me more........)

so I"ve switched tasks, will prune hedges and wash outside windows.

the ONLY thing I noticed was a distinct lower gut ache yesterday, seems to be gone today. :huh: I tell ya, I don't know WTH to think of this.............

P.S. Hi tom, Emily, Susie Q, Bev, Janet, and everyone else! :)

HI JIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thanks for the silly Texas laws. I NEVER take more than three sips of beer standing up. :lol:

and good morning adn happy Sunday to all!!!

:)

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      results from 13 day gluten challenge - does this mean I can't have celiac?

      By catnapt · Posted

      highly unlikely  NOTHING and I mean NOTHING else has ever caused me these kinds of symptoms I have no problem with dates, they are a large part of my diet In fact, I eat a very high fiber, very high vegetable and bean diet and have for many years now. It's considered a whole foods plant based or plant forward diet (I do now eat some lean ground turkey but not much) I was off dairy for years but recently had to add back plain yogurt to meet calcium needs that I am not allowed to get from supplements (I have not had any problem with the yogurt)   I eat almost no processed foods. I don't eat out. almost everything I eat, I cook myself I am going to keep a food diary but to be honest, I already know that it's wheat products and also barley that are the problem, which is why I gradually stopped eating and buying them. When I was eating them, like back in early 2024, when I was in the middle of moving and ate out (always had bread or toast or rolls or a sub or pizza) I felt terrible but at that time was so busy and exhausted that I never stopped to think it was the food. Once I was in my new place, I continued to have bread from time to time and had such horrible joint pain that I was preparing for 2 total knee replacements as well as one hip! The surgery could not go forward as I was (and still am) actively losing calcium from my bones. That problem has yet to be properly diagnosed and treated   anyway over time I realized that I felt better when I stopped eating bread. Back at least 3 yrs ago I noticed that regular pasta made me sick so I switched to brown rice pasta and even though it costs a lot more, I really like it.   so gradually I just stopped buying and eating foods with gluten. I stopped getting raisin bran when I was constipated because it made me bloated and it didn't help the constipation any more (used to be a sure bet that it would in the past)   I made cookies and brownies using beans and rolled oats and dates and tahini and I LOVE them and have zero issues eating those I eat 1 or more cans of beans per day easily can eat a pound of broccoli - no problem! Brussels sprouts the same thing.   so yeh it's bread and related foods that are clearly the problem  there is zero doubt in my mind    
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