The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

[Darn210]

Memo: To any board moderator

Subject: People who can't correctly title their topics

Patti or Amanda or Bev (anybody else?),

Can you guys fix topic titles? I wrote Ttg instead of tTG and stuff like that really annoys me. Plus, I don't want to get a post/PM from Tom telling me that I wrote it wrong (heehee, yankin' your chain, Tom!!)

[jerseyangel]

I am using the wrong quote, they are stopping in Feb, its been all over the news and people are all Poed...well why should tell sell bakery items that cause obesity....etc etc...

I was there on Sunday, I think we are stopping there tonight to pick up some things for dinner.

Do a google search about the cigarette sales....you should see what the people up in NY are saying...some things are harsh.

Wow--I had no idea. I'll do a search and see what I've missed.

[DingoGirl]

I thought the Yeti was an everywhere/all the time phenomenon.

Is Yeti omnipresent???? could be....does he take different shapes? as far as I know, I haven't see a large, hirsute beast here............

OMG!!!!!! Just had a startling thought.....does Yeti need his butt glands squeezed, Emily, insofar as you can tell? Was he seen......scooting about on the carpet?

good Lord.........that would be.....(h)anus........... :lol: <cracking self up>

Cash the check, hold onto the money, run up your credit cards on things like vet bills, declare bankruptcy -everything magically erased- then get the boob job with the cash.

Or, even better, charge the boob job, then bankruptcy, then mad spending spree with cash.

mad scientist....I like this logic very much.....

Good morning....Wait.....wanna have lifted spirits this whole day, so....

Good Morning, all????...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?????!!!!....

um.....ahem....must clarify this, Emily. the superfluous mood-enhancing punctuation only applies to question marks and exclamation marks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but..............dots.............are...........fun.......tooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!

TINK! TINK! TINK! <knife tapping on water goblet>

Ahem *throat clearing*

May I have everyone's attention?

I have just discovered that Patti has now posted more times than Scott the Board Creator/Administrator. She is now the overall #1 poster!!!!!! She has MORE opinions than anyone else on this forum!

Congratulations Patti . . . be on the look out for superfluous fluids

*snort*

this is quite funny!

Nikki, yes it's a real biotch. There's no fun whatsoever involved!

YETI sighting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

On Regis and Kelly (oops I almost said Kathy Lee, same difference).

Apparently they have some winter contest named in honor of Yeti, seems Yeti is a symbol of winter and snow getaways.

I wonder how they got that idea.

OMG - I saw this yesterday - - whilst typing my LAST (for a tiny little while) parole report.....did crack up......

p.s. Isn't the proper spelling BEEOCH?????????? just trying to verify

MORNING SILLEEEEEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[elye]

Congrats Patti! you are the posting Queen!!!

Wow, Patti! You've had a lot to say! I can't imagine 10,000 posts. You should print them all off and submit it to a publisher as a book--it would be a novel! Actually, I think one of us should do this with this Silly thread...funniest reading around, I tell you. Riotous humour, high drama, great jokes, the odd recipe...Ain't seen nuthin' like that on the New York Times Bestseller List!

YETI sighting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

On Regis and Kelly (oops I almost said Kathy Lee, same difference).

Apparently they have some winter contest named in honor of Yeti, seems Yeti is a symbol of winter and snow getaways.

I wonder how they got that idea.

I suspect that I know....I think one of our posters is really Regis Philbin. I've been suspecting Mr. Psawyer for some time....

[Green12]

OMG - I saw this yesterday - - whilst typing my LAST (for a tiny little while) parole report.....did crack up......

p.s. Isn't the proper spelling BEEOCH?????????? just trying to verify

Hmmm, the spelling of biotch/beeoch is up for debate.

I have only seen it as "Bi-otch" so that is what I went with

I was just thinking that pigeonholing Yeti as a symbol of winter and snow getaways might be slightly prejudicial, and frankly type casting.

For we know Yeti parties all year long.

[elye]

OMG!!!!!! Just had a startling thought.....does Yeti need his butt glands squeezed, Emily, insofar as you can tell? Was he seen......scooting about on the carpet?

OMG....so that explains the condition of my livingroom carpet!! Man, here I was, blaming my husband. YETI'S GOT FULL ANAL GLANDS!!

It all makes sense, now...when he was goaltending, he kept dropping to the ice in what we thought was a classic butterfly save motion, but then he'd be rubbing the ice with his behind. We thought it was just a bit of finesse...but OMG, tapes of his technique are being studied, analysed and copied by the bigwigs in CA. You guys watch your pro goalies over the next few games--could be a whole new move sweeping the NHL...

Oh! He's gone to Alex's for a few days. Someone should tell her to roll up all carpets...Maybe her mom can go over and attempt to empty him out, as she apparently knows the technique.

...Yes, things could get mighty hanus.....

[Green12]

I suspect that I know....I think one of our posters is really Regis Philbin. I've been suspecting Mr. Psawyer for some time....

Hee hee, that explains it!

[DingoGirl]

Wow, Patti! You've had a lot to say! I can't imagine 10,000 posts. You should print them all off and submit it to a publisher as a book--it would be a novel! Actually, I think one of us should do this with this Silly thread...funniest reading around, I tell you. Riotous humour, high drama, great jokes, the odd recipe...Ain't seen nuthin' like that on the New York Times Bestseller List!

can you imagine.......all of Patti's posts.....for about the first 8,500, quite normal...then, a subtle but startling shift as she enters the silly vortex.........

PSAWYER is REGIS??????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes, this does make sense......I can see it.....

OMG - forgot to mention earlier - - I ALREADY HAVE the Victoria's Secret cutlets.....they are fantastic....but still, just not quite satisfying...... *sigh*

need to find another windfall somehow....there were lots of rich, VERY much older men at this fab bar last night.....must find one who is quite old and QUITE ill

[Darn210]

need to find another windfall somehow....there were lots of rich, VERY much older men at this fab bar last night.....must find one who is quite old and QUITE ill

This one made me laff out loud.

[Green12]

need to find another windfall somehow....there were lots of rich, VERY much older men at this fab bar last night.....must find one who is quite old and QUITE ill

There's a plan.

Have you seen that movie, oh I forget the name, Jennifer Love Hewitt and Sigourney Weaver are mother daughter and they team up to take old rich men for their money.

Kinda like that, only a Susie/Dingo team.

You will probably need the chicken cutlets

How's Stinker doing today?

[DingoGirl]

I was just thinking that pigeonholing Yeti as a symbol of winter and snow getaways might be slightly prejudicial, and frankly type casting.

For we know Yeti parties all year long.

typecasting!!!!!!!!!!! Yes, they really don't know Yeti, do they.......

It all makes sense, now...when he was goaltending, he kept dropping to the ice in what we thought was a classic butterfly save motion, but then he'd be rubbing the ice with his behind. We thought it was just a bit of finesse...but OMG, tapes of his technique are being studied, analysed and copied by the bigwigs in CA. You guys watch your pro goalies over the next few games--could be a whole new move sweeping the NHL...

oh my gaaaaaaaaawd........... :lol: P'raps there could be a new name for this maneuver? you know how those ice skaters always get things named after their moves?

T

Kinda like that, only a Susie/Dingo team.

You will probably need the chicken cutlets

The cutlets always do command a bit more attention whilst in play......

Stinker........ mygawd, I knew this would be prolonged......she had what may have been her last orchard walk yesterday...(unless we drive there) We took a very slow amble over there....but STILL, she did a little bit of prancing and even a short spurt of RUNNING in there.....but was wiped out afterwards. She still smiles a lot.....gets very excited for visitors, but she is constantly lying in a heap on the floor in the same uncomfortable-looking position........breathing problems..... *sigh*

I am managing to keep my grief at bay, however...... It will certainly consume me again.....when it's time....

[blueeyedmanda]

We should publish the Silly Thread.....it would make people's days better, always would get a laugh when they read. No matter what our Silly thread never has negativity....

[DingoGirl]

We should publish the Silly Thread.....it would make people's days better, always would get a laugh when they read. No matter what our Silly thread never has negativity....

I KNOW! 'Tis a utopian place, really! And we are SO FUNNY!!!!!!!!! Surely everyone would die laughing whilst reading our PAGES of nonsense!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[jerseyangel]

And we are SO FUNNY!!!!!!!!!

We are, aren't we

[Green12]

We should publish the Silly Thread.....it would make people's days better, always would get a laugh when they read. No matter what our Silly thread never has negativity....

Somehow I think the Yeti and anal gland humor will be lost on some people.

I know Christmas is soooo last year, but did anyone get anything exciting that they have been enjoying using/playing with?

[blueeyedmanda]

I know I have come close to piddling on the floor

[Darn210]

I know I have come close to piddling on the floor

Amanda said piddling

[Darn210]

I know Christmas is soooo last year, but did anyone get anything exciting that they have been enjoying using/playing with?

Thoroughly enjoyed your phrasing . . .

We got a wii . . . not that I'm into that sort of thing, but hubby has been enjoying it . . . it was for the kids.

[~alex~]

OMG....so that explains the condition of my livingroom carpet!! Man, here I was, blaming my husband. YETI'S GOT FULL ANAL GLANDS!!

It all makes sense, now...when he was goaltending, he kept dropping to the ice in what we thought was a classic butterfly save motion, but then he'd be rubbing the ice with his behind. We thought it was just a bit of finesse...but OMG, tapes of his technique are being studied, analysed and copied by the bigwigs in CA. You guys watch your pro goalies over the next few games--could be a whole new move sweeping the NHL...

Oh! He's gone to Alex's for a few days. Someone should tell her to roll up all carpets

Let's just say it was an interesting evening. The Yeti seemed very out of sorts when I picked him up at the train station yesterday. Lots of scooting and chasing his tail (does he have a tail??) and seeming quite uncomfortable. So I did what I had to do: put on some gloves, said a little prayer, and found myself to be very thankful that my mom taught me how to empty our poor puppy's anal glands that fateful day over a decade ago! Our yeti seemed much relieved and slept very peacefully last night. He's like a brand new (mystical, magical) man today!!!

[~alex~]

We got a wii . . . not that I'm into that sort of thing, but hubby has been enjoying it . . . it was for the kids.

Yay!!! I love our Wii. Although I often feel like I have tennis elbow after playing the tennis game too much. I love the bowling too! We got Big Brain Academy for Christmas from my dad but we haven't played it much yet.

[DingoGirl]

Somehow I think the Yeti and anal gland humor will be lost on some people.

I'm not so sure. I was on the phone wiht my mom this morning, and she asked what I was doing. Catching up with the sillies, was my answer......and I snorted and said, one of the gals has husband who's been scooting his butt all over her carpet, so she has to squeeze his anal glands......my mom let out the loudest guffaw.......she thinks we're crazy.

and then sometimes she'll call and say......"GET OFFA THAT COMPUTER!!!!!" (she knows )

Let's just say it was an interesting evening. The Yeti seemed very out of sorts when I picked him up at the train station yesterday. Lots of scooting and chasing his tail (does he have a tail??) and seeming quite uncomfortable. So I did what I had to do: put on some gloves, said a little prayer, and found myself to be very thankful that my mom taught me how to empty our poor puppy's anal glands that fateful day over a decade ago! Our yeti seemed much relieved and slept very peacefully last night. He's like a brand new (mystical, magical) man today!!!

*snoooort*

sounds like a peaceful night was had by all.

[Darn210]

Let's just say it was an interesting evening. The Yeti seemed very out of sorts when I picked him up at the train station yesterday. Lots of scooting and chasing his tail (does he have a tail??) and seeming quite uncomfortable. So I did what I had to do: put on some gloves, said a little prayer, and found myself to be very thankful that my mom taught me how to empty our poor puppy's anal glands that fateful day over a decade ago! Our yeti seemed much relieved and slept very peacefully last night. He's like a brand new (mystical, magical) man today!!!

Wow Alex!!! Mighty brave of you!!! Here, we thought Emily was brave for measuring his inseam, but I think you just took the (gluten-free) cake . . . and the rest of us thank you for your sacrifice.

[blueeyedmanda]

Did anyone else remember the little rhyme

If you dribble

When you Piddle

Be a sweetie

Wipe the Seatie

[Green12]

We got a wii . . . not that I'm into that sort of thing, but hubby has been enjoying it . . . it was for the kids.

I am so not up on all the technological gadgets out there, I don't even know what a wii is

But glad your hubby kids are enjoying it

I got the cutest little snow boots. I love them

I don't need a lot to be happy

Now I can trek around with Yeti, if need be.

Good work alex!

If you dribble

When you Piddle

Be a sweetie

Wipe the Seatie

Amanda, you are already practicing up for the little kiddos! You are speaking their language

[elye]

need to find another windfall somehow....there were lots of rich, VERY much older men at this fab bar last night.....must find one who is quite old and QUITE ill

Yes! deathly ill, and a multimillionaire...a dream catch!

oh my gaaaaaaaaawd........... P'raps there could be a new name for this maneuver? you know how those ice skaters always get things named after their moves?

A new, technical name for this maneuver...The Icerub? And those goalies who adopt said move would be referred to as Icerubbers...

Stinker........ mygawd, I knew this would be prolonged......she had what may have been her last orchard walk yesterday...(unless we drive there) We took a very slow amble over there....but STILL, she did a little bit of prancing and even a short spurt of RUNNING in there.....but was wiped out afterwards. She still smiles a lot.....gets very excited for visitors, but she is constantly lying in a heap on the floor in the same uncomfortable-looking position........breathing problems..... *sigh*

You poor girls....

I know I have come close to piddling on the floor

...Er...hmm...Amanda...okay, brainsharing with you is quite fine, but remind me NEVER to enter a bladder-sharing pool with you...

So I did what I had to do: put on some gloves, said a little prayer, and found myself to be very thankful that my mom taught me how to empty our poor puppy's anal glands that fateful day over a decade ago! Our yeti seemed much relieved and slept very peacefully last night. He's like a brand new (mystical, magical) man today!!!

Wow Alex!!! Mighty brave of you!!! Here, we thought Emily was brave for measuring his inseam, but I think you just took the (gluten-free) cake . . . and the rest of us thank you for your sacrifice.

Mygawd...Way to go, Alex! All this, and no danger pay...

Did anyone else remember the little rhyme

If you dribble

When you Piddle

Be a sweetie

Wipe the Seatie

I do not remember that little rhyme, but it brings up a question I have long pondered:

Why is there sometimes pee on the seat in a women's washroom stall? What is a woman doing that allows her to get urine (sometimes a fair amount) on the seat? Is she standing? Oracle Peter, do you know the answer to this?