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The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

TriticusToxicum

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jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
Would we even smile if the Three Stooges' eye-pokings and head-smackings were done slowly, methodically? Nope. (Hmmmmm...perhaps a bad example. Who really finds those old routines funny at all?) :rolleyes:

Sometimes I kinda do :ph34r::lol:

My 23 year old loves this stuff and many Sunday mornings the Stooges are on in the background as I make the pancakes :P

And I find myself laughing..... :unsure:

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Darn210 Enthusiast
Darn210
Posted
Morning Sillies,

I am home....and feeling crappy!

Hey, Amanda! You're feeling happy, so you must be better. Great! :) How's John?

:huh::blink::huh:

HUH????

Did anybody else wonder about this??

:lol::lol:

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted

sorry Emily I am not too happy. I feel horrible, it is like a stomach bug and nothing helps :)

Patti you are right I am glad I stayed home and the roads are getting slick already.

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

Oh, duuuuuhhhhh.....

Yeah, misread the "crappy" for "happy". So you're still not well, Amanda. :(

Janet didn't get the Tamiflu to you fast enough....

I've arranged for DD's hockey team to do a cross-training session in the Y pool tonight. Should be quite funny, all these thirteen-year old girls thinking, "Oh, how sappy...floating around a pool", and then watching them stagger out after this killer of a resistance workout. My girlfriend teaches this kick-boxing aerobics class in the water. It is not for the faint of heart, so hopefully it'll smarten up these teeny-boppers. I'll be in there with 'em, so I hope to change their view of me as just one of the army of hockey moms....

But OMG...remember the last time I was showing off in front of a bunch of kids. Well....I cannot get a huge bruise in the water. However, I can drown.... :blink::lol:

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
However, I can drown.... :blink::lol:

Well for heaven's sake--put on your water wings! :P

By saying "water wings"...does that make me sound old? :unsure:

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted

If you don't want water wings you can always get one of those inner tubes with the seats in the middle so the kiddies don't fall through :)

tom Contributor
tom
Posted
Would we even smile if the Three Stooges' eye-pokings and head-smackings were done slowly, methodically? Nope. (Hmmmmm...perhaps a bad example. Who really finds those old routines funny at all?) :rolleyes:

EVERYONE!!!!!! :D <nyuk-nyuk> :lol:

Must admit I expected to be flying solo on the Stooge Laughter & Appreciation Plane (S.LA.P.) so it's good to see it isn't as gender-specific as it's always seemed.

(Or bunking solo in the Stooge-Induced Laughter & Levity Yurt?) :P

Besides making all the film shorts, they used to tour. My Dad saw 'em live at the ole Pickwick Theatre (actual spelling, not just sillyville-adjusted) in Park Ridge IL.

I've seen movies there myself (2nd town over from my hometown) and I'm positive Hillary C has too!! :lol:

She grew up in Park Ridge.

P.S. I'm feeling better than I have in weeks and I'm not askeert to say so!!!!

Literally woke up singing lol :lol:

Some pop song I wouldn't expect to like. Part of the chorus is "Live your life w/ eyes wide open .. . " and it's been in some shampoo comm'l for quite a while.

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jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
P.S. I'm feeling better than I have in weeks and I'm not askeert to say so!!!!

Literally woke up singing lol :lol:

Careful there, Tom....

Great to hear you're feeling so well, though :)

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted

Tom-good to hear someone is feeling well. A lot of the Sillies (me including) are sick.

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
Tom-good to hear someone is feeling well. A lot of the Sillies (me including) are sick.

Amanda--you have to be all better by Friday!!!!! (Wegman's picture day)

I wonder if I didn't have a stomach bug last week--it's so hard to tell sometimes.....

I actually hope that's what it was and not the cheese and peas. :lol:

nikki-uk Enthusiast
nikki-uk
Posted
Well for heaven's sake--put on your water wings! :P

By saying "water wings"...does that make me sound old? :unsure:

:lol: ...what about ''arm bands'' :lol:

P.S. I'm feeling better than I have in weeks and I'm not askeert to say so!!!!

Literally woke up singing lol :lol:

Some pop song I wouldn't expect to like. Part of the chorus is "Live your life w/ eyes wide open .. . " and it's been in some shampoo comm'l for quite a while.

Oh dear GAAAAAAAaaaaaaawdddd!!!!!!!!!!!....watch out! Ptaum's had some seed cake feeling GOOD!!! :lol::lol:

....Did anyone else like Laurel & Hardy???? ....another totally predictable type of comedy ....I'm easily pleased :D

tom Contributor
tom
Posted
Oh...was our Peuzeee getting coiffed today?????

I too recall a scheduled hog-ectomy for tuesday.

Oh, duuuuuhhhhh.....

Yeah, misread the "crappy" for "happy".

ROFL that's quite the misreading there, Em.

At least they rhyme I suppose, but if I were to say I need surgery, might you reply that I should tell the truth, as perjury is a jailable offense and they may not do gluten-free for me?

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted
By saying "water wings"...does that make me sound old? :unsure:

Patti........yes. :lol:

Must admit I expected to be flying solo on the Stooge Laughter & Appreciation Plane (S.LA.P.) so it's good to see it isn't as gender-specific as it's always seemed.

Hafta say, I don't often board those flights.... :rolleyes:

Much funnier for me were Laurel and Hardy. Now there was some great, ahead-of-its-time comedic stuff. Just saw Way Out West again for the first time in many years, and guffawed heartily.

Literally woke up singing lol :lol:

Great stuff, Tom! :) Happy to hear it was a real song, and not some drivel by Puff-thingama-Daddy-o.... :huh::lol:

Tom-good to hear someone is feeling well. A lot of the Sillies (me including) are sick.

I just keep 'a knocking wood....I feel superb! Did one of my longest runs today, blood sugars are stellar, no recent glutenings.....what's up?

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
Patti........yes. :lol:

:lol: As I typed it, I thought--gawd, I sound ancient :o:huh:<_<:P

tom Contributor
tom
Posted
:lol: As I typed it, I thought--gawd, I sound ancient :o:huh:<_<:P

:huh: I don't unnerstan'.

Water wings didn't exist when I was young, as far as I know, but what would a young'in call them besides 'water wings'?

:huh:

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted
:huh: I don't unnerstan'.

Water wings didn't exist when I was young, as far as I know, but what would a young'in call them besides 'water wings'?

We called 'em floaties!

Perhaps it was just the idea of suggesting I float around the pool like a little old lady with arm thingies on... :lol:

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted

John had the stomach bug last week and my coworkers have been suffering with it too...

Maybe you did have the stomach bug Patti....I have to say it is the worst I have had in years.

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
We called 'em floaties!

Perhaps it was just the idea of suggesting I float around the pool like a little old lady with arm thingies on... :lol:

Hee Hee--I don't know...it just sounded like a word that people don't use anymore. :blink:

DingoGirl Enthusiast
DingoGirl
Posted
This must be a founding principle of high-quality physical comedy. Sped up, things are hilarious; slow just isn't funny. Lobbing said computer out of a car that is coasting along a side-street does nothing to me. Would we even smile if the Three Stooges' eye-pokings and head-smackings were done slowly, methodically? Nope. (Hmmmmm...perhaps a bad example. Who really finds those old routines funny at all?) :rolleyes:

count me in....I find them phunny also. :ph34r: but, only for about 15 minutes, and then I'm done with it. Like Jim Carey - a little goes a long way - I can only take about TEN minutes of that one.

OMG - I am a freak - - there are certain movies I will watch over and over.....silly romantic comedies usually. Gail will come over for movies and say, with a completely resigned look on her face - We are not watching The Holiday again, are we? :lol::ph34r: She's seen it twice....me? About....10 times. :ph34r:

And Something's Gotta Give w/ Jack Nicolson/Diane Keaton - I own it and have seen it about.......15 times. But here's the weirdest part....if it comes on TV - I will watch it also. :blink::huh::ph34r:

Oh...was our Peuzeee getting her barnet coiffed today?????.........of course IF she threw her pc out the car (at HIGH speed!, causing multiple pile ups :o ) we shall NEVER know !!!!!!!!!!!

all coiffed up here!!!!!!!! Yes, slight super-model quality today. But today only folks, it's just so fleeting. :lol::angry:

Computer is still intact and in one piece, and safely here at home. High-speed technological cacophony is on standby. :lol:

But OMG...remember the last time I was showing off in front of a bunch of kids. Well....I cannot get a huge bruise in the water. However, I can drown....

:unsure: yes, do mind the drowning part..... '

Amanda! Feel better!

okay - speaking of misunderstandings and misinterpretation, here are some funnies:

Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says: "Slim, I'm 83 years old now and I'm just full of aches and pains. I know you're about my age.

How do you feel?"

Slim says, "I feel just like a newborn baby."

"Really? Like a newborn baby!?"

"Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants."

*****

An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen.

The two gentlemen were talking, and one said, "Last night we went out to a new restaurant and it was really great. I would recommend it very highly."

The other man said, "What is the name of the restaurant?"

The first man thought and thought and finally said, "What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love?

You know... The one that's red and has thorns."

"Do you mean a rose?"

"Yes, that's the one," replied the man. He then turned towards the kitchen and yelled, "Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?"

*****

Hospital regulations require a wheel chair for patients being discharged. However, while working as a student nurse, I found one elderly gentleman already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet, who insisted he didn't need my help to leave the hospital.

After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let me wheel him to the elevator.

On the way down I asked him if his wife was meeting him.

"I don't know," he said. "She's still upstairs in the bathroom changing out of her hospital gown."

*****

Couple in their nineties are both having problems remembering things. During a checkup, the doctor tells them that they're physically okay, but they might want to start writing things down to help them remember.

Later that night, while watching TV, the old man gets up from his chair. "Want anything while I'm in the kitchen?" he asks.

"Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?"

"Sure."

"Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?" she asks.

"No, I can remember it."

"Well, I'd like some strawberries on top, too. Maybe you should write it down, so's not to forget it?"

He says, "I can remember that. You want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries."

"I'd also like whipped cream. I'm certain you'll forget that, write it down?" she asks.

Irritated, he says, "I don't need to write it down, I can remember it! Ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream - I got it, for goodness sake!"

Then he toddles into the kitchen. After about 20 minutes, the old man returns from the kitchen and hands his wife a plate of bacon and eggs. She stares at the plate for a moment.

"Where's my toast ?"

*****

A senior citizen said to his eighty-year old buddy:

"So I hear you're getting married?"

"Yep!"

"Do I know her?"

"Nope!"

"This woman, is she good looking?"

"Not really."

"Is she a good cook?"

"Naw, she can't cook too well."

"Does she have lots of money?"

"Nope! Poor as a church mouse."

"Well, then, is she good in bed?"

"I don't know."

"Why in the world do you want to marry her then?"

"Because she can still drive!"

*****

Three old guys are out walking.

First one says, "Windy, isn't it?"

Second one says, "No, it's Thursday!"

Third one says, "So am I. Let's go get a beer."

*****

A man was telling his neighbor, "I just bought a new hearing aid.

It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art. It's perfect."

"Really," answered the neighbor, "What kind is it?"

"Twelve thirty."

*****

Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical.

A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm.

A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said, "You're really doing great, aren't you?"

Morris replied, "Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.'"

The doctor said, "I didn't say that. I said, You've got a heart murmur; be careful.'"

*****

One more !

A little old man shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlor and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool. After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split.

The waitress asked kindly, "Crushed nuts?"

"No," he replied, "Arthritis."

tom Contributor
tom
Posted

Cacophony!! :lol:

Jokes!! :lol:

:lol:

:lol:

:lol:

Arthritis :lol: :lol:

DingoGirl Enthusiast
DingoGirl
Posted
I too recall a scheduled hog-ectomy for tuesday.

hog-ectomy

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

tom Contributor
tom
Posted
Open Original Shared Link
DingoGirl Enthusiast
DingoGirl
Posted
Open Original Shared Link

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

dear gawd.....I HOPE I don't buy that........... :ph34r:

Darn210 Enthusiast
Darn210
Posted

Susie - excellent funnies! I've already passed them on to me mum.

Emily - I think Patti's water wings are an excellent idea. We've even still got some around here somewhere. Wish I could get them to you in time. 'Course they might not fit. They're made for a three year old. Do you have skinny little toothpick arms?

I was never a three stooges fan. Laurel and Hardy were OK. I loooovvvved Open Original Shared Link

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
Open Original Shared Link

:lol: Gawd :lol:

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