The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

[elye]

OMG - Em really does have her hands full with this Man Head Toddler who appears out of nowhere for lots of people......hope I don't see him in my dreams tonight - or next to my bed when I wake up.....

Gawd, it sounds like he could be anywhere. . .....

Sooozie, check Weezie's poops. .. ......

And Janet. . . . .you need to keep checking in that tree o' yours. . .. . ....

[curlyfries]

Gawd, it sounds like he could be anywhere. . .....

Sooozie, check Weezie's poops. .. ......

And Janet. . . . .you need to keep checking in that tree o' yours. . .. . ....

Has anyone checked the port-o-potty?

[elye]

All right, I've gone ahead and changed my av. There had best be NO SIGN of Sam Hill Man Head (crap, is that an aboriginal/First Nations name, or what??) appearing in the back of this team shot, an extra winger or forward, floating around with a sideways helmet on . . ... ...

[jerseyangel]

I saw part of Oprah and was actually gonna mention it. I love the big clean-up/organizing shows. The kitchens gross me out, though.....how do people live like that??????? <pukephace>

Before I got wrapped up in the election, I was an HGTV fiend.

Yesterday O had Dr Oz on talking about cellulite and phat globules. That was pretty depressing...

[jerseyangel]

Has anyone checked the port-o-potty?

Why? Did someone drop a fone in it?

[elye]

Has anyone checked the port-o-potty?

Crap! That'd be no good, as Sam Hill Man Head has NO HANDS to catch my plunging cellphone!

[DingoGirl]

and I don't mind if they eat out at the neighboUrs.

Alrighty then . . . back to your regularly scheduled programme.

:lol:

but GIAKNIT!!!!!!!!! what if them ladybugs eat at the neighbors and......don't come back? better bug supply? phatter insekts?

Why? Did someone drop a fone in it?

The First Nations Man Head is in the porta potty!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ewwwwwwwww - Em - do NOT hold him up to yer face when he reappears!

speaking of HGTV - am supposed to try AGAIN to get all the channels w/ the AT&T hookup man coming on Monday......dear gawd.........if it works......how am I gonna tear myself away from all the shows?

you may never see me again.......

[jerseyangel]

Git it Soozle--you'll OD on it at phirst, but the novelty will wear off after a while. I go in spurts wif it--either I'm constantly watching, or not at all.

Some of the shows are just so snarkalicious--like the House Hunters or the one where the prospective buyers spend a night in a house they are considering......I always wonder who in hell would allow kids, pets....one couple had a party wif like a dozen phriends----in someone else's house

[Green12]

Hold the phone.....ladybugs eat other bugs????? I did not know that......

Lisa said manboobs

Some of the shows are just so snarkalicious--like the House Hunters or the one where the prospective buyers spend a night in a house they are considering......I always wonder who in hell would allow kids, pets....one couple had a party wif like a dozen phriends----in someone else's house

Exactly!

HGTV is slowly changing I noticed. Some of my favorite shows are gone and there's a slight shift to a "reality tv" feel.....reality decorating, who knew it was possible?!?!

Hope you get yer cable Susie, keeping my fingers crossed it works out this time

[psawyer]

What in Sam Hill am I supposed to say? I don't know who Sam is either. A long day is coming to an end, and I am heading off to bed after this post.

Em, I changed my avatar last night. My current one is a recycled one from a couple of years ago, and shows a little p%$#@#. I don't know where your missing man image went.

Laura, that PM was incredibly rude. How can anyone say something like that?

And yes, ladybugs are insectivorous. Among other things, they eat aphids, which are a common garden pest.

[nikki-uk]

Morning ALL!!!

Who will buy this wonderful feeling?

I'm so high I swear I could fly.

.....I'm not, not at all (mores the pity)........ just continuing Jess's theme of Oliverian random lyrics

OK< , ....THE TEACHER BLINKED EIGHT TIMES after her head was removed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NOT really, but I got yer going.

Nope, he made a sandwich (instead of toast) hence no use of 'toasta bags'. GADS!!! The poor sod had to eat a sandwich made from UNrefreshed gluten-free bread (which in itselph IS a most heinous crime for which the teacher should lose her 'ead).......nowt suspicious in it

WHY the poo crimes I wonder??????

I can't quite put me finger on it.... but I'm almost convinced he's getting something at school, they are not inspiring confidence in me that they've got a handle on the whole gluten-free thing

e.g.....could it have been the gluten-free biscuits you sent in for him?? he had some yesterday

Errrr, NO!!!!!.....'cos they are GLUTEN FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!! <sheesh!>

Anyhoo, I still want to chop their 'eads orf

Pepto's nice cuz it doesn't stop you up for days like Imodium can and it's fun for kids cuz it turns your poo funny colors! I have found it good for when I'm glutened, it's faster and helps keep the nausea down.

Phunny coloUred poo????

...don't suppose 'mustard' coloUr counts as odd or funny for a coeliac??? *sorry! TMI?*

Pink poo!!! How exciting!!

! ....immodium generally don't even slow him down if he's glutened ..so may get some pepto in

Accidental my A$$!!!! There was a HUGE write-in-vote campaign on my part . . . of course I was stripped of me duties when I tried to make the whole school district go gluten free . . . a little ahead of my time I think . . .

Again, shame

OK, WHAT IN HELL SAM HILL is going on wiv Man-Head???

He has mysteriously disappeared fron M's av????

Roaming the psilly annals or *gasp* ... is he out there????? OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh,oh, almost phorgot - love Janet's tree!!

Got bugs on mine

We don't have LadyBUGS..we have ladyBIRDS.....but I put them on my roses as they eat the aphids

[Darn210]

And yes, ladybugs are insectivorous. Among other things, they eat aphids, which are a common garden pest.

Yep, I got me some aphids, too, on me honeysuckle. I was just doing some research . . . don't know if ladybugs will be as effective on scale. I believe they DO prefer aphids . . . taste like chicken, you know.

[elye]

Good Day, All Psilliefelders!

I am staring a Sam Hill Manhead right now, as he sits on the table near our front window (I am certain he has caused a number of the many children who walk by our house twice a day, to and from the school bus, to report to their mothers, "See that man sitting sideways in that room, there? He has NOT moved for three days! I think he may be a corpse, propped up. The lady that lives there is kinda weird. Let's call the police")...... .

Anyways, I have decided that he must become a work of art, or at least incorporated into one. I have not done a sculptural piece in a couple of years. . . . perhaps it is time. I need inspiration, so I'm waiting for the creative muse to start whispering in my ear, and pointing me toward this interesting item for a starting point.

The start of a totem pole?....All in profile - -T'would be a first, I am certain..... . . ..

Some of my favorite shows are gone and there's a slight shift to a "reality tv" feel.....reality decorating, who knew it was possible?!?!

Reality decorating.

As opposed to. . . ...

Faux decorating.....where it's all pretend. Just looks like rearranging, recovering, constructing and planning is happening as you're rushing about, when really - - well, you're just rushing about.... ...

Yep, I got me some aphids, too, on me honeysuckle. I was just doing some research . . . don't know if ladybugs will be as effective on scale. I believe they DO prefer aphids . . . taste like chicken, you know.

Hey!! They taste like chicken? Janet's eaten some. . . ...well, why aren't we ALL eating aphids? A superb protein source, and they are everywhere... . .Janet, there is your answer. You've got an endless supply in yer garden . .....start saving some money and getting rid of these pests at the same time! Throw them into your casseroles, spaghetti sauce, on top of chocolate sundaes and in yer salads.....you could probably grind them up in the cuisinart and make Aphid Flour. Gluten-free. . .... . ya might stumble upon the next big celiac diet product... . ..

[Darn210]

.....you could probably grind them up in the cuisinart and make Aphid Flour. Gluten-free. . .... . ya might stumble upon the next big celiac diet product... . ..

When people ask me what I use instead of (wheat) flour, I've always told them . . . you can grind anything up and make flour out of it . . . then sell it for a sh!tload of money at a health food store.

Off to go work play with the chidlins. Remind me when I come back to tell you me "bum" story.

[jerseyangel]

HGTV is slowly changing I noticed. Some of my favorite shows are gone and there's a slight shift to a "reality tv" feel.....reality decorating, who knew it was possible?!?!

I've noticed the same thing. I couldn't put me phinger on it but that's it--reality decorating. Personally, I like more decoration and less baloney.

Em, I changed my avatar last night. My current one is a recycled one from a couple of years ago, and shows a little p%$#@#.

Just about passed me toast through me nose!

OK< , ....THE TEACHER BLINKED EIGHT TIMES after her head was removed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NOT really, but I got yer going.

Well, ok fer her this time.....but we're keeping our eye on her.

The lady that lives there is kinda weird. Let's call the police")...... .

Uh-oh Em....you're becoming that lady!! Every neighboUrhood has one.....

Off to go work play with the chidlins. Remind me when I come back to tell you me "bum" story.

Jan-it! I keep meaning to ask how the job wif the wee ones is going.

[elye]

Off to go work play with the chidlins. Remind me when I come back to tell you me "bum" story.

Ah!! A bum story!! Most excellent. . . . .....

Uh-oh Em....you're becoming that lady!! Every neighboUrhood has one.....

I know........ . . .

The lady with the Manhead Effigy in her window. . ....think that may be a phirst. . . .. ..

[jerseyangel]

I know........ . . .

The lady with the

Gawd Has Sam Hill gotten to Em??????? What happened????

[jerseyangel]

Ok, phew! You were just editing

[elye]

Gawd Has Sam Hill gotten to Em??????? What happened????

Yes, this was quite odd, and I refrained from mentioning it because I phiggered everyone would be like this - - or , and just think I'm continuing on too long about Sam Hill Manhead and his hijinks. I was typing away, just starting me post, my cursor NOWHERE NEAR the reply button, and blip!, my unfinished post was suddenly posted.

I loudly exclaimed, "WHAT in Sam Hill??"

[jerseyangel]

I loudly exclaimed, "WHAT in Sam Hill??"

Well 'natch!

[DingoGirl]

Gawd, it sounds like he could be anywhere. . .....

Sooozie, check Weezie's poops. .. ......

*snort* forgot to comment on this earlier......if Weezee HAD eaten the Man Head......well, he'd be found in very tiny bits all over me yard AND in her poops Quite an av taht would make.....

OMG! I should have photographed her GOLDEN poops......w/ the Hershey's Kisses wrappers......lovely av

NOT really, but I got yer going.

Nope, he made a sandwich (instead of toast) hence no use of 'toasta bags'. GADS!!! The poor sod had to eat a sandwich made from UNrefreshed gluten-free bread (which in itselph IS a most heinous crime for which the teacher should lose her 'ead).......nowt suspicious in it

WHY the poo crimes I wonder??????

well WHAT in Sam Hill happened?

but most important - - WHAT is "unrefreshed" bread does that mean untoasted?

Yep, I got me some aphids, too, on me honeysuckle. I was just doing some research . . . don't know if ladybugs will be as effective on scale. I believe they DO prefer aphids . . . taste like chicken, you know.

taste like chicken!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyways, I have decided that he must become a work of art, or at least incorporated into one. I have not done a sculptural piece in a couple of years. . . . perhaps it is time. I need inspiration, so I'm waiting for the creative muse to start whispering in my ear, and pointing me toward this interesting item for a starting point.

The start of a totem pole?....All in profile - -T'would be a first, I am certain..... . . ..

I think you should paint him, in the Fauve style! See some of my wackl paintings on facebook.....I think people are askeert of them because they're not realism and they think I'm crazy I LOVE wacky-coloUred Fauve stuff (fauve means wild beast) ......and that Man Head IS a beast, I think

Faux decorating.....where it's all pretend. Just looks like rearranging, recovering, constructing and planning is happening as you're rushing about, when really - - well, you're just rushing about.... ...

this made me guffaw - what in HELL is reality decorating? well......guess I"ll find out on Monday, if it all works accordign to plan

Ok, phew! You were just editing

Yes, this was quite odd, and I refrained from mentioning it because I phiggered everyone would be like this - , and just think I'm continuing on too long about Sam Hill Manhead and his hijinks. I was typing away, just starting me post, my cursor NOWHERE NEAR the reply button, and blip!, my unfinished post was suddenly posted.

I loudly exclaimed, "WHAT in Sam Hill??"

I don't we can ever get enough of the Sam Hill Man Head during the phull moon

natch

[jerseyangel]

OMG! I should have photographed her GOLDEN poops......w/ the Hershey's Kisses wrappers......lovely av

Yes! You coulda put it up for the holidays

[DingoGirl]

Yes! You coulda put it up for the holidays

OMG Hershey's Golden Christmas Poops - limited time, only for the holidays!

Patti your innocent smile and then........your av comment.........just cracked me up Sounds like it's a crime - - "incessant poster"

Maybe we should all put a really innocent-looking smiling av of ourselves and put up our main character trait underneath it.

Mine would say: Constant, inappropriate babbler

natch :lol:

Bev's: Phrequent napper

Gail's ex-boyfriend: Farter Starter

[jerseyangel]

I actually can't take credit fer the line--twas Em who came up wif it a phew pages back!

[Mtndog]

Y'all have gone completely PHARKING mad :lol: Had to poop in and leave an Uncle Ray

. . .and then the fight started

#1 When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her

someplace expensive....

so, I took her to a gas station..... and then the fight started....

*********************************************************

#2 I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Light for

$10.95. Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95. I told her

the beer would make her look better at night than the cold cream.

And that's when the fight started.

************************************************************************

#3 After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for

Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's

license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had

left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I

would have to go home and come back later.

The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'.

So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That

silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my

Social Security application..

When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the

Social Security office.

She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten

disability, too'

And then the fight started.....

***********************************************************************

#4 My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion,

and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat

alone at a nearby table.

My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'

'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to

drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she

hasn't been sober since.'

'My God!' says my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on

celebrating that long?'

And then the fight started.....

***********************************************************************

#5 I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the

road and slowly the other driver got out of his car.

You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things

just seem funny?

Yeah, well I couldn't believe i t.... he was a DWARF!!!

He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, 'I AM NOT HAPPY!!!'

So, I looked down at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?'

And that's how the fight started.....

************************************************************************

# 6 I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took

my order first.

'I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.'

He said, 'Aren't you worried about the mad cow?'

' Nah, she can order for herself.'

And that's how the fight started.....