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The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original


TriticusToxicum

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mimommy Contributor
The spruce is spectacular, different and amusing; and dad loved crabapple trees.

Either will be poifect. :)

Emily, I lurve the idea of the weeping crabapple. No reason in particular, only that they are so pretty in the spring--joyous and colorful, a fitting tribute :)

today my mouth still hurts and it feels like the skin is burned......lovely!

Sheesh! How are feeling now? Sounds like you had a scary night, poor thing :(

Nikki! How is Tel feeling? (snicker) You gots to watch that cider--much more potent than, say, lemonade :rolleyes:


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ranger Enthusiast

How about no undies?

I vote weeping crab.

I never knew a peach could do that! You poor thing.

I now know why I've turned into a Blue Sue. My DH ( and that doesn't stand for dear) has been a blastard since he quit smoking last Sun. I've been tiptoeing around and he's been blowing up about every little thing. I thaught by now, he'd settle down, but last night he was HORRIBLE! I fixed a nice steak dinner and after he literally exploded Into some kind of extreme rage over nothing that ended with him telling me to leave. Yeh, like that's going to happen. So, I woke up this am all sad and depressed thinking about where to go and not wanting to bring you all down but then thaught I'm not going to let him get me down. Got to find my cilli.

I think my anti-thong fellings stem from Jeolosy. I lost so much wieght last year that I no longer have an ass, and when I look at young gils with there thongs exposed and there asses hanging out, I get just plain jelous. I am an assless wonder!

I'm not going to can pumpkin if I'm not going to live here.

Pumpkin. Now that's a phunny word. How 'bout our poet lariot tackle dat one?

ranger Enthusiast
Emily, I lurve the idea of the weeping crabapple. No reason in particular, only that they are so pretty in the spring--joyous and colorful, a fitting tribute :)

Sheesh! How are feeling now? Sounds like you had a scary night, poor thing :(

Nikki! How is Tel feeling? (snicker) You gots to watch that cider--much more potent than, say, lemonade :rolleyes:

New here. Who's Tel?

jerseyangel Proficient
New here. Who's Tel?

Tel=Nik's husband :)

Em--I'll be thinking of you all on Sunday. I think either tree you decide upon will be very fitting.

Off to get me hair cut......

flourgirl Apprentice

Mornin! (or mmmmblemmm, depending on the type of household you have). So much to comment on/reply to. I just know I'm gonna forget somethin impo'tent.

Em-N-Em phirst......my vote is for the weeping crab!!! Acktully kinda phunny....in that....tis a tree so beautiful, so joyful in flower, has to be laughing with spring, not weepy or crabby, and inspires happiness, not tears or crabbiness. Seems poifect to me!

Thongs! Igggh! I had never heard of them until my middle age (now, THAT seems phunny to me...I coit-nly don't pheel middle-ages.....(wasn't that bephore the renne-sansce?). Any wayz...I did try them....still have a couple pair...they still look brand new because I can't bear them. They make me pheel all too conscious of an area I'd rather not be conscious of, thank you very much.

Porr bluezy Psuezzies! Wish I could help cheer youse all up! Psuessle.....I vote yes on the Psilly Psummit at the expense of someone who apparently would not miss the cash! You could tell her that we are the entertainment portion for the gathering! Does she have a private jet that can make the rounds to pick us all up? We could be getting all wound up together on the way there! :lol:

Glad to hear Max is doing all right. YOu have to be so careful with people medicines given to pets.

Amanda.....man o-man! Sounds like a scare incident! My son loved fruit when he was little....but I had to peel EVERYTHING! The skins would do to him what the peach did to you. He would start out with his little mouth pheeling itchy and strange, then the welts. I thought it was odd that he could eat the insides but not the skins. He had a thing about textures too. Wouldn't eat beans or peas or anything with that "mealy" pheel, or rubbery textures (apple skins). Anyhow, I hope you pheel better by now.

Heyyy Juuuude.....hope you are hangin in there all right....and that you turn that Birch in to her superiors at least, if not in a letter to the editor for the whole community to hear about. She should not be doing business! Of course, you may want to wait until all of your issues are settled (and perhaps after you've moved) to write this :ph34r:

Can't think what else.....oh well, missed opportunities and all of that. Later...

blueeyedmanda Community Regular

Thanks for the help guys. I do think that my best option is to loose the skins!

ranger Enthusiast
Yes, this is a toughie :lol: :lol:

but really, the only thing I'd do with some Louboutins is sell them on ebay, straightaway!!!!!!!!!!

Sillies - - someone has a song stuck in his head - everyone was guessing - and then someone posted this - am scared and awestruck out of my mind :o:huh::blink:

(there is.....um......an e'er so slight Weezel Voice quality to it :lol: )

Open Original Shared Link

Swooz

Askeered a flying. Think Pegs would swing for a limo to Ohio?

Snooz


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ranger Enthusiast

Whoops! Sorry. Still don't know how to use this thing

Mtndog Collaborator

Hi Pseuzzle (WAVING MADLY))))) :D

Let's see. To catch up,

No thongs for me

No vaseline on me face

That video was scary!

Amanda- icky peach reaction :(

Am cracking up at the proliferatuon of sam's all over the board. Had to put on me moderator voice yesterday and there was Sam, sniffing my hair in me avatar! :lol:

Em--*sniffle*

The crab tree would give him is opportunity to be crabby, something he never got the chance to do while he was making you all laugh :)

I like the crab apple tree too! Either way, hang in there this weekend. We'll be thinking of you :wub: :wub: and how special your dad was.

Psillies, I have a disease that normal people get!!!!!!!! I have strep throat- :wacko: :wacko: I never get real diseases- very strange. Must be my body's rebellion against the lack of antibiotics these few months. When the nurse asked me if I had been on antibiotics recently, I burst out laughing and told her to find one I hadn't been on- she actually did.

This strep throat thing is very strange. I must eat ice cream all day :D :D And take extra naps!

elye Community Regular
I am an assless wonder!

:lol::lol: Struck me as phunny, Pseuzhinn, in the midst of a sad post....... :( Sorry you is havin' troubles on the homefront.

Tell him to kiss yer ass! Hmm...well, you apparently don't have one.. .... ..

Tell him to kiss yer armpit! <_<:rolleyes:

Thanks for the help guys. I do think that my best option is to loose the skins!

Amanda! My mom reacts exactly the same way to some apples and all pears. Peeling the apples does help. Try it!

Am cracking up at the proliferatuon of sam's all over the board. Had to put on me moderator voice yesterday and there was Sam, sniffing my hair in me avatar! :lol:

:lol::lol: This is fantastic, Bevel - -your sexual, strange, heeeelarryus av on your official, serious moderator posts......what can they all be thinking? I know:

"Crap, there are moderators over there on that bizarre, cult-like thread of 2,300 pages..........Scott's gotta CONTROL these people!"

Strep throat! Gross, Bev. Ya don't need that. Take care of thyself...... . .

nikki-uk Enthusiast
Psillies, I have a disease that normal people get!!!!!!!! I have strep throat- :wacko: :wacko: I never get real diseases- very strange. Must be my body's rebellion against the lack of antibiotics these few months. When the nurse asked me if I had been on antibiotics recently, I burst out laughing and told her to find one I hadn't been on- she actually did.

This strep throat thing is very strange. I must eat ice cream all day :D :D And take extra naps!

SOL!!! :lol: BEVELL!! (*snort*-out-loud!!)

Does this mean you are finally becoming more normal?? :unsure:

You must be gutted having to eat ice-cream & take naps eh????

:lol: Tel has just about shook his cider hangover off now !!

ranger Enthusiast
Hi Pseuzzle (WAVING MADLY))))) :D

Let's see. To catch up,

No thongs for me

No vaseline on me face

That video was scary!

Amanda- icky peach reaction :(

Am cracking up at the proliferatuon of sam's all over the board. Had to put on me moderator voice yesterday and there was Sam, sniffing my hair in me avatar! :lol:

I like the crab apple tree too! Either way, hang in there this weekend. We'll be thinking of you :wub: :wub: and how special your dad was.

Psillies, I have a disease that normal people get!!!!!!!! I have strep throat- :wacko: :wacko: I never get real diseases- very strange. Must be my body's rebellion against the lack of antibiotics these few months. When the nurse asked me if I had been on antibiotics recently, I burst out laughing and told her to find one I hadn't been on- she actually did.

This strep throat thing is very strange. I must eat ice cream all day :D :D And take extra naps!

I was afraid that this would happen. All the talk of pole-dancing and thongs - it was only a matter of time before someone got strip throat. But, I'm surprized at the advice to eat ice cream. Shouldn't a stripper eat something a little more "figger friendly"? (Do hope you feel better)

ranger Enthusiast

Having random thaughts.

I have blue eyes

Have a daughter named Amanda

Suzie and Susan

Husband (on my s-list today) named John

Can't injest gluten

Am certifiably insane

Wonder what else?

ranger Enthusiast

Another random thaught

Anyone with a wierd physical thing? I've got one. It's called Aidies Syndrome (not to confused with aids) It's pronounced long adeez, and named for the doc who discovered it. It's manifestations are

1. My right pupil does not dilate.

2. I have no reflexes in my elbows or knees (told you I had no funny-bone).

It's fun with docs, who never believe me and keep pounding away with thier little hammers till I'm black and blue and then finally get it. Or, at parties. And, in dim light, my left pupil is large and the right is very small. I can always tell the exact second someone notices that. Children are

Mtndog Collaborator
I was afraid that this would happen. All the talk of pole-dancing and thongs - it was only a matter of time before someone got strip throat. But, I'm surprized at the advice to eat ice cream. Shouldn't a stripper eat something a little more "figger friendly"? (Do hope you feel better)

Something funky you say? I've got STRIP THROAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

elye Community Regular
But, I'm surprized at the advice to eat ice cream. Shouldn't a stripper eat something a little more "figger friendly"? (Do hope you feel better)

:lol::lol: ...Thought the Call-Girl Diet was coffee and cigarettes. ....... .... . .

Anyone with a wierd physical thing?

Oh, dear gawd..... .. ........ where in hell do I begin??. . .... :lol:

1. My right pupil does not dilate.

I figgered there was somethin' goin' on with yer eyes, Psewzhin - - didn't guess Aidies, though. Ya keep on hittin' the reply button after you've posted! :lol::P

DingoGirl Enthusiast
Psillies, I have a disease that normal people get!!!!!!!! I have strep throat- :wacko: :wacko: I never get real diseases- very strange. Must be my body's rebellion against the lack of antibiotics these few months. When the nurse asked me if I had been on antibiotics recently, I burst out laughing and told her to find one I hadn't been on- she actually did.

This strep throat thing is very strange. I must eat ice cream all day And take extra naps!

:o Jenn has STRIP THROAT :lol: also....I used to get it ALL the time, pre g f . Bevel! naps and ice cream! Poifect!! You sound psilly for being so psick :P

Emmel :wub: LOVE the trees, both of them, but if I had to, I'd choose crabapple, I think. Stay strong for the weekend....it will be poignantly magic :(:wub:

This is fantastic, Bevel - -your sexual, strange, heeeelarryus av on your official, serious moderator posts......what can they all be thinking? I know:

"Crap, there are moderators over there on that bizarre, cult-like thread of 2,300 pages..........Scott's gotta CONTROL these people!"

[/i

SOL!!!! :lol: this gave me an out-loud snortle

and please note - Bevel's caption says "My Manhead" :lol::wacko: love it.....

I was afraid that this would happen. All the talk of pole-dancing and thongs - it was only a matter of time before someone got strip throat. But, I'm surprized at the advice to eat ice cream. Shouldn't a stripper eat something a little more "figger friendly"? (Do hope you feel better)

:lol: Seu-zen is phunny

Having random thaughts.

I have blue eyes

Have a daughter named Amanda

Suzie and Susan

Husband (on my s-list today) named John

Can't injest gluten

Am certifiably insane

Wonder what else?

OMG :lol: :lol: seu-zen is REALLY phunny

Another random thaught

Anyone with a wierd physical thing? I've got one. It's called Aidies Syndrome (not to confused with aids) It's pronounced long adeez, and named for the doc who discovered it. It's manifestations are

1. My right pupil does not dilate.

2. I have no reflexes in my elbows or knees (told you I had no funny-bone).

It's fun with docs, who never believe me and keep pounding away with thier little hammers till I'm black and blue and then finally get it. Or, at parties. And, in dim light, my left pupil is large and the right is very small. I can always tell the exact second someone notices that. Children are

:blink:

I dunno what to say - great party tricks, though! My really looooooooooooooooong burps are my party tricks - stops the show every time :lol: But - I can't do it if there's any cute guys around, or anyone I"m trying to impress -

SILLS! I'm so manchester today <_< too much time on my hands....not being productive enough.....pondering whether I"ll work for A$$ Hat again, or find sumfin else -(both thoughts terrorize me)

Weez to the vet today for thyroid checkup - did full blood panel - $116 - - :huh:

bad news - the $$$ (money just keeps flowing out from my credit card wallet

good news - thyroid and blood panel NORMAL - but - noticing signs of slowing down in the Weez :(

forgot everything else (like that's new)

:huh:

jerseyangel Proficient

Quirky.....well I have a "hypermobile jaw" :rolleyes: When Mark heard this he said--"I could have told you that!" :lol:<_<:lol:

And of course there's the aforementioned toe that cracks on demand. :P

elye Community Regular
My really looooooooooooooooong burps are my party tricks - stops the show every time :lol: But - I can't do it if there's any cute guys around, or anyone I"m trying to impress -

Whot?? This isn't completely, sweep-em-off-yer-feet impressive for just about anybody?? :lol:

Quirky.....well I have a "hypermobile jaw" :rolleyes: When Mark heard this he said--"I could have told you that!" :lol:<_<

:lol: Um.......hmm.......While seated, I can get both feet behind my head, braced above my neck.

Not really pretty....rather startling, actually. Think it would rank right up there with Sooozle's burps - - wouldn't be casually pulling it off to impress anyone. . . .. <_<:lol:

And hey!! I probably crack at the same time!

ranger Enthusiast

God, I miss Sam Hill Manhead. He is no longer in my life, as is John. It was not an eyeball problem, or a computwer illiteracy problem, but, it was an extreme attempt to gain attention. I thaught if I posted once, no one would listen, but if I posted twice, THE WHOLE WORLD WOUD BE WATCHING! God, I am such a child of the 60's! I didn't make it to Woodstock or the Chicago National Convention, but in my heart, I was there. And , in my heart, I'm here. Now, that's scary!

Suzie- Can you arrange that limo ride? It's only 2000 miles (maybe 3), but I promise not to sh.. in the limo. And, your friend is rich - she can afford to clean up after me! And a bunch of others.

My rock garden is where my parents and sister are "buried". They all chose to give thier bodies to science, so there is no graveyard to say goodbye to. So, for each one, I planted a large rock and an evergreen plant. In good weather, I say goodby everyday- in the winter, not so much.

I know I'm getting mauldlin and depressing, so I'll try to lighten up.

Pumpkin poem

pumpkinn vine

makes me toot.

is divine

to let it shoot.

can't see the diff

tween you and cukes

till pumpkin pickles

make me puke

That is a celiac poem. I'm going to bed before you all hate me!

elye Community Regular

Whoa.....FOUR tornadoes have touched down in the greater Toronto area - - Newmarket and Durham.

POeter! You okay? :unsure:

Lisa Mentor

Sillies, inquiring minds want to know...

https://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/index.ph...c=61214&hl=

psawyer Proficient
Whoa.....FOUR tornadoes have touched down in the greater Toronto area - - Newmarket and Durham.

POeter! You okay? :unsure:

Yeah, tornadoes near here, but none affected us. News reports still coming in, but it appears that the front and danger have passed us by. The system is moving east, in your direction.

elye Community Regular
Yeah, tornadoes near here, but none affected us. News reports still coming in, but it appears that the front and danger have passed us by. The system is moving east, in your direction.

.......Terrific......... . . . . . .. :unsure:

mimommy Contributor
Whoa.....FOUR tornadoes have touched down in the greater Toronto area - - Newmarket and Durham.

POeter! You okay? :unsure:

Geez Peter :o I hope you and Dorothy Jacquie are OK?

Hey, speaking of Toronto--Scott never heard a definite answer about going to Brampton--they still haven't scheduled the trip for his job. I may make it there yet...

Sillies, inquiring minds want to know...

https://www.celiac.com/gluten-free/index.ph...c=61214&hl=

Pffft! Gah! :lol::lol::lol:

Please, somebody do one for me. I just about wracked my brains for 2 days trying to figure out how to layer images on Photoshop~to no avail :angry: I even have a pic. w/ a "pole"...yes, that's right, a pole. We were pretending to pole dance at our 40th b-day party last year <snicker>

Of course, you could hardly tell I was pretending <wink>

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    • Dora77
      Sorry for the long post. I’m 18, and I was diagnosed with celiac disease and type 1 diabetes (T1D). My transglutaminase IgA was >128 U/mL, EMA IgA positive twice, and I’m HLA-DQ2 and DQ8 positive. I’ve been completely asymptomatic since diagnosis, even when I cheated with gluten sometimes in the past and used to eat out(2-5 years ago) I don’t get the typical celiac reactions, which makes it really hard to know when (or if) I’ve been glutened. But for the past year, I’ve been the most strict with my diet, and that’s also when a bunch of new issues started. I eat completely glutenfree, never eat out, dont eat food that says „may contain gluten“.   Current Health Problems • Floating, undigested stools for over a year now. Dont think its related to celiac as it was like this since im 17 and not 13-16( i got diagnosed at 13). • Chronic back pain started gradually, worsens with movement, lots of cracking/popping sounds. Been ongoing for a year now. First noticed in the gym. • Abdominal bulge on the right side, not painful but seems to be getting slightly bigger. Doctor didn’t find a hernia on ultrasound, but it was done lying down (I’ve read those can miss hernias). Noticed it like 6 months ago, couldve been there longer. • extremely dry and mildly swollen hands (this started before I started excessive hand-washing), and bloated face. • Signs of inattentive ADHD (noticed over the past 3 years), now combined with severe OCD focused on contamination and cross-contact. • Growth/puberty seemed to started after going gluten-free. Before that I was not developing. Dont know if any of these are because of celiac as my dad doesnt have those and he is a lot less strict gluten-free then me. I also had pancreatic elastase tested four times: values were 46 (very low), 236, 158, and 306 (normal). Gastroenterologist said one normal value is enough and I don’t have EPI. 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My dad, who also has celiac but doesn’t care about CC, buys fruits, and he might’ve picked them up right after handling gluten bread. That makes me feel unsafe eating them. Even fruit at stores or markets feels risky because so many people with gluten on their hands touch them.   My Home Situation (Shared Kitchen) We’re a family of 5. Only my dad and I have celiac. He eats glutenfree but doesn’t care about CC and sometimes (but rarely) cheats. My mom and siblings eat gluten bread at every meal. My mom is honest (so if i ask her to be cautious, she most likely would try to), but doesn’t seem to understand how serious celiac is. She: • Stopped using gluten flour • only cooks gluten-free meals (but they still heat up gluten bread and also cook gluten noodles) • Keeps separate butter/jam/jars for me • Bought me a stainless steel pan Bu we didn’t replace old wooden utensils, cutting boards, or other pans. 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Do I need to worry about touching doorknobs, fridge handles, light switches, etc. that family members touched after eating gluten? What about public places like bus handles or school desks? Or like if i went to the gym, I would be touching stuff all the time, so there will be small amounts of gluten and those would get transferred on my phone if I touch my phone while in the gym. But I want to knos if it would be enough to do damage. 3. Is an endoscopy (without biopsy) enough to tell if my intestines are healed? I’d pay privately if it could help and if i dont get a refferal. Or do i need a biopsy? 4. Could my job (powder coating, sandblasting, etc.) expose me to gluten or damage my intestines through air/dust? 5. Do I need certified gluten-free toothpaste, hand soap, shampoo, or moisturizer? (For example: Vaseline and Colgate don’t contain gluten ingredients but say they can’t guarantee it’s gluten-free.) 6. Is spices like pepper with “may contain traces of gluten” safe if no gluten ingredients are listed? Or does everything need to be labeled gluten-free?  7. Is continuing to only eat my own food the better choice, or could I eventually go back to eating what my mom cooks if she’s careful? 8. is cutlery from dishwasher safe if there are stains? Stuff like knives is used for cutting gluten bread or fork for noodles etc. I often see stains which i dont know if its gluten or something else but our dish washer doesnt seem to make it completely clean. 9. I wash my hands multiple times while preparing food. Do i need to do the same when touching my phone. Like if i touch the fridge handle, I wash my hands then touch the phone. I dont eat while using my phone but i leave it on my bed and pillow and my face could come in contact with where it was.  10. Do i need to clean my phone or laptop if theyve been used by people who eat gluten? Even if no crumbs fall onto my keybaord, i mean because of invisible gluten on their fingers. 11. Does medication/supplements have to be strictly glutenfree? One company said they couldn‘t guarantee if their probiotics don’t contain traces of gluten.  12. I had bought supplements in the past, some of them say glutenfree and some of them dont(like the brand „NOW“ from iherb). I bought them and used them when i wasnt washing my hands so often, are they still safe? As I touched and opened them after touching door knobs, water taps etc. It was like a year ago when i bought those and even though i was eating gluten-free, I never worried about what i touch etc. I know this post is long. I’m just extremely overwhelmed. I’m trying to protect myself from long-term health damage, but the OCD is destroying my quality of life, and I honestly don’t know what’s a reasonable level of caution anymore. Thanks for reading.
    • lmemsm
      I've been making a lot of black bean brownies lately because it's one of the few gluten free dessert recipes that actually tastes palatable.  I've also seen chocolate cake recipes with black beans.  Someone mentioned a cookie recipe using lentils in place of flour.  Just wondering if anyone's run across any tried and true recipes using beans, lentils or peas for desserts?  I've seen a lot of recipes for garbanzo flour but I'm allergic to garbanzo beans/chickpeas.  Was wondering if adzuki or pinto beans might be useful in replacing some or all of the flour in baking.  Since gluten free flours can be crumbly was hoping the beans might help produce a better, less crumbly consistency.  Any recommendations for recipes?  Thanks.
    • lmemsm
      I've seen a lot of recipes for chia pudding, so I decided to make some with chia, water, cocoa and honey.  Didn't like the taste, so I added ground sunflower and ground pumpkin seed to it.  It tasted okay, but came out more like frosting that pudding.  I used to make pudding with tapioca starch, milk powder, water and sugar.  It came out very good but I haven't figured out what to use to replace the milk powder to make it dairy free.  Most starches will work in place of tapioca starch but quantity varies depending on the type of starch.  If I didn't add enough starch to get a pudding consistency, I'd add gelatin as well to fix it.  Avocado and cocoa makes a good dessert with a pudding like consistency.  Unfortunately, I have a bad reaction to avocados.
    • lmemsm
      Seems like when I find a gluten free product I like, the producer stops manufacturing it and then I have trouble finding a new gluten free source for it.  What's worse, I've been contacting companies to ask if their products are gluten free and they don't even bother to respond.  So, it's making it very hard to find safe replacements.  I was buying teff flour at nuts.com and they no longer carry it.  I noticed Naturevibe has teff and soy flour.  However, I can't get a response as to whether their flours are safe for someone with celiac.  Can't get a response from Aldi if their peas are safe for someone with celiac either.  I know Bob's Red Mill has teff flour but was hoping to get a large quantity.  I've been using up the 20 ounce Bob's Red Mill teff flour too quickly.  Does anyone know of a good source for teff or soy flour?  Any recommendations where to get gluten free beans, peas or lentils?  I found some packages of gluten free beans at Sprouts but not much variety.  I've also been looking for lentil elbow macaroni and it seems like no one is making that now that Tolerant was bought out.  Any suggestions for safe sources for these types of ingredients.  Thanks.
    • chrish42
      All I can say is this site is great!
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