I Want To Share This Glorious Moment

[revenant]

Hello

This morning I caught a show called "The Incurables". It was about a girl retelling her struggles with bipolar disorder, psychotic episodes and major depression. She was very suicidal. In the end, she discovered she was dairy and soy intolerant and was able to go off of all of her meds after removing these foods. Very good show!

I recorded it and watched it with my mom. My mom, who often does not believe that I am gluten, soy or lactose intolerant, or that it has much mental effect. It was too large an idea for her to comprehend. She watched it because my younger sister has bipolar disorder, aggression, depression, and psychotic episodes exactly like the girl in The Incurables. And, at the end of the episode, I took a chance and said "Remember how I used to have crying episodes and hyperactive episodes? Remember how I would overreact to everything you said to me? I haven't done that for months now".. And..she said "You might be onto something here" !!! SHE BELIEVES ME!!

Even better... It just so happens that today she was having a reaction to something (she is... carelessly gluten free, IE eating hamburgers off of the bun type of gluten free) and could relate all too well with the person in the show... And she said, that she wants to try doing this right because she has never felt completely relieved of her symptoms (she is heavily ADD, depressed, anxious, OCD, and her very high dosages of meds are no longer working). She now has high blood pressure, and her mental illnesses are ntot being controlled by the meds anymore.. So she is considering going dairy free!! (Because both her mother and all 3 of her children are lactose/casein? intolerant)

We had a huge talk about how it feels to have a reaction, get glutened or lactosed. And she actually listened to me when I described things like serotonin depletion, and how all of her symptoms are common, and what food intolerances can do, and such! It was also very nice for her to come clean to me about her own thoughts, how she feels in such detail, and I just love to listen and support her. This is a breakthrough! I finally feel understood!

(I can't garuantee that she will still think this way tomorrow, because these kinds of breakthroughs never last through to the next day with her, but it was a moment that I needed to have...)

So for all out there who wish their family would try a gluten or lactose free diet... Be an example. Be healthy and happy, and they will want to follow. Also make sure it is THEIR idea... show them something, an article, or a show...

[mushroom]

Oh sweetie, I am so happy for you :D This is indeed a major breakthrough moment, a validation of your suffering, and of your self-diagnosis. I do hope she still recalls it tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after that! Make sure that show is saved, and if she forgets, show it to her again.

Be thoughtful and helpful with her, help her to do it right without being reproachful or preachy and you two may be able to once again establish a normal mother/daughter relationship. I must add that I think you show a remarkable maturity and understanding beyond your 17 years on this earth, and if anyone can do it, you can!!! Good luck.

[eatmeat4good]

That is wonderful! I am so amazed when young people figure this out! And you really are wise to know how to approach others too. I am trying not to be preachy with my sister but I want her to feel better too. Your perseverence paid off with your mom. I'm gonna take your advice on how to approach this by making it their idea. Brilliant! And I am only 30 years older than you!

[kareng]

Yeah!!!!!!!! Happy Dance!!!!

Hope she still feels this way in a say or two. Keep the recorded show. Maybe she would like to re-watch important parts.

[txplowgirl]

I'm happy for you Revenant, I pray your mother will be easier on you and your sister now. Keep up the good work and perhaps show that show to your sister too. Maybe it will help her also realize that she can get better. I'm keeping all of you and your family in my prayers.

[wheeleezdryver]

That IS a glorious moment!! YAY!! hopefully things will continue in such a positive manner!

[revenant]

Haha thanks for the replies and support You are all so amazing.

Unfortunately it was a one-day kind of thing... I was again taken to see a social worker and again my mother said that I had an eating disorder because I do not eat dairy gluten or soy, she was once again oddly hysterical about it... They partially believed her too. The social worker said that I am not eating these foods because "my life is so out of control that I am trying to control my life through my food". SIGH. At least I had a moment!

[Gutsy Girl]

I must add that I think you show a remarkable maturity and understanding beyond your 17 years on this earth, and if anyone can do it, you can!!! Good luck.

Wow, you're only 17 and you're able to handle this peacefully?! GOOD FOR YOU!!!! I was NOT at this point until I was about 24 or 25 years old (26 now). (Don't let me puff up your head, now. LOL.) *HUGS!*

I'm happy for you and hope that over time, things will improve in your relationship with your Mom.

For the first time, my Mom is starting to see that it's not all in my head. My Mom got diagnosed with breast cancer this year and she's been going through a whole heck of a lot with that, including lots of pain now that she's never had before. Living my whole life with chronic pain, I was surprised when my Mom asked me almost a year ago "How do you deal with the pain on a daily basis?" I nearly fell over and knocked my teeth out! Her cancer has brought us closer together as I've been able to support her and show her my love through this struggle. She's grown personally as well. (My personal two cents in my own situation is that God has been changing our hearts and causing us to really LOVE each other more than ourselves, which is a miracle, as three years ago we couldn't stay in the same house for more than three days without killing each other.)

Best wishes!!

[Gutsy Girl]

The social worker said that I am not eating these foods because "my life is so out of control that I am trying to control my life through my food". SIGH. At least I had a moment!

I have always hated that stupid phrase "when life gives you a lemon, make lemonade". Seriously...I hate that quote!!

But if you look at the social worker's statement POSITIVELY, you can say, "Yes, my life is out of control, I feel like *fill in the blank* and I want to live more normally. I believe that certain foods cause this discomfort (whatever your symptoms are) and that if I avoid the offending foods, I may feel better and feel more in-control of my life. This is a good thing, as I am taking responsibility for my health and wellbeing unlike many people twice my age, and I choose to see it this way."

I wonder what she'd say to that! Hahaha.

HUGS!!

[mushroom]

Of course you are trying to control your life through your food - for those who are food intolerant that is the only way that life can be controlled. Can't you give this so-called social worker some references for reading on the foods your are intolerant of which might help her understand why you avoid those foods?? Only a fool eats things which cause them harm - and you can tell her that from me

I am so sorry that you mom's moment of lucidity was only temporary Maybe the moment will occur when you can watch the tape together again. Is there any way you can surreptitiously cook her gluten free food so that she can see that she is not confining herself to a life of misery, but lifting herself out of a life of misery?

Or maybe you can take HER to the social worker and say "My mom is making me sick by trying to make me eat things which cause me harm?" Not so far out

However it works out, my ghostly friend, stay strong and know we love and support you.

[plumbago]

Can you tell us more about The Incurables? Is there a web site? How can we access the particular program you reference?

Thanks.