Jump to content

  • Welcome to Celiac.com!

    You have found your celiac tribe! Join us and ask questions in our forum, share your story, and connect with others.



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A1):

    Celiac.com Sponsor (A1-M):

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Our Content
    eNewsletter
    Donate

Funny Things That Happened To Me Along The Way

Finally-45

By Finally-45
in Coping with Celiac Disease

Recommended Posts

Finally-45 Contributor
Finally-45
Posted

I just reached my 1 year anniversary. I thought I'd share a few funny things that happened. I have teens who were with me on many of these events, so you can imagine the number of times I've reheard the stories with rolls of laughter.

1. Me: Do you have a gluten-free menu?

Waitress: No, we don't charge for you to see the menu.

2. Me: Would you happen to have an ingredient or allergen list for your products?

Waiter: Such as...

Me: You know, like when a person is allergic to peanuts or wheat...

Waiter: Oh you want to know if we have oats in our food?

(I never figured this one out, we assumed he must have had someone before me who asked about oats and wheat in the same question.)

3. Co-worker: Please have some brownies.

Me: No thanks.

Co-worker: Oh I insist, everyone says they're good.

Me: No, I eat gluten-free, I'll have to pass.

Co-worker: Oh no, no, they're low calorie brownies.

4. Family member: What is celiac?

[i answered the question]

Family member: Does that mean you can't eat meat?

5. Family member: So what DO you eat?

[i answered the question with emphasis on unprocessed meat, vegetables, fruit, yogurt, rice, potatoes, and so on.]

Family member: What store do you go to..cause I don't eat any of those things....

6. Another family member chimes in: Oh I see gluten-free products at the store all of the time.

Me: Yes, times have gotten better for Celiacs.

Family member: You mean this has been going on for years?

7. Family member: Did you get the kids tested too?

Me: Yes... they don't have it.

Family member: Thank God, they can be normal.

8. Me: [in MoMs Organic Market asking for gluten-free lip gloss]

Clerk: I'm glad I could help. Someone else came in here looking for gluten-free products... if you don't mind... what happens if you eat gluten?

Me: [i gave some symptoms, but emphasized everyone can have different experiences.]

Clerk: Does that mean you could kiss someone and give it to them?

9: Me: [in Bare Minerals, mentioning that it's nice to know their entire product line is gluten-free.]

Clerk: Oh you have cancer?! We get a lot of cancer patients.

10: And the mother of them all-

Me: I'll take the burger with no bun from the gluten-free menu. [and I pointed at it]

Waiter: Ok, that'll be a burger.

Me: From the gluten-free menu right?

Waiter: Oh yeah sure.

[The burger comes out on a bun.]

Me: I don't think this is gluten-free.

Waiter: It is...

[He ends up getting the manager.]

Manager: Is there a problem with your gluten-free burger?

Me: Yes, it's on bread.

Manager: [Whips it away, has the cook start over.]

Waiter: Sorry about that, I thought gluten was lettuce or something.

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


GottaSki Mentor
GottaSki
Posted

Congratulations on your one year anniversary!

and thanks for the giggles

I've had a very similar experience to all of these and I'd guess we are not alone ;)

gatita Enthusiast
gatita
Posted

These are hilarious, thanks!

IrishHeart Veteran
IrishHeart
Posted

These are great!

My fav: "Thank God, they can be normal."

(? nothing quite like a back-handed compliment?) :lol:

I hope you answered with a big smile and a "Oh gosh, yes, I am so grateful! One of us abnormals in the house is plenty."

Fantastic recollections of your first year--thanks so much for sharing. Laughing my butt off here.

and I'm loving your sig line:

"Just enough Irish genes to put up a fight and beat all of the above."

I hear ya, sister. ;)

1974girl Enthusiast
1974girl
Posted

Man I am sad. We have been doing this 9 months and I have not had any of those hilarious things! I needed that! I do have people ask what gluten is and stuff but nothing that funny! Thanks!

Persei V. Enthusiast
Persei V.
Posted

"Can you eat pasta?"

"No."

"So do you want a slice of cake, some cookies, I don't know, something?"

True story,

GFreeinFL Newbie
GFreeinFL
Posted

Congrats on your anniversary! I loved reading your list, as it reminded me of conversations I've had as well. The most common reaction I get once I explain what I cannot eat is, "what about bread? pasta? bagels?" "I don't know how you could live without bread!" Guess it's hard to imagine being from NY and not enjoying pizza or bagels!

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


1desperateladysaved Proficient
1desperateladysaved
Posted

ha ha HA!

Diana

Finally-45 Contributor
Finally-45
Posted
  • Author

Yes, I think it's a sign that nutrition should always be a required part of high school health! It's amazing how many people don't really understand food groups, not to mention food sensitivities. A lot of these folks were youngsters. No wonder the country isn't eating right.

I also eat at a lot of ethnic food (especially those with curried sauces, which are normally coconut cream based.) where some of the employees have limited English. I have had some funny times with them also, but I excuse them since they often know terms such as 'breading' or 'crust', but may not understand the words 'wheat' or 'gluten'. It's easier to buy the products and read the label of couse. However, I have been pleasantly surprised at some Asian places that now carry the gluten-free soy sauce. As soon as you say "gluten-free" they'll immediately ramble off a few menu items made with corn starch and no soy sauce, even if the rest of their English is very broken. If you ask them to clean the grill or otherwise avoid cross contamination, they'll roll their eyes and say, "Yes!" Works for me. Comical, but we get through it.

kittty Contributor
kittty
Posted

Those were hilarious!

I ordered a sandwich without the bread once, and the server asked why. I told her I couldn't eat gluten, and she said "it's okay because we only use whole wheat bread here." :rolleyes:

Finally-45 Contributor
Finally-45
Posted
  • Author

I ordered a sandwich without the bread once, and the server asked why. I told her I couldn't eat gluten, and she said "it's okay because we only use whole wheat bread here." :rolleyes:

Oh man, that made me laugh so hard!

ndw3363 Contributor
ndw3363
Posted

Early last year when I first started my gluten-free journey, I went to eat at a restaurant - asked the hostess for their gluten-free menu. They had the typical "Allergen" menu, but that works just fine. Our server comes to the table (a very perky 19 year old looking young woman named Amber) to take our order. As I ordered, I must have pointed to what I wanted - she looks at the menu "oh no sweetie that's our allergen menu". Me: yes, I know I asked for this menu. Her: "Oh you poor thing! I just had an older lady that had that too!" Somehow, ordering a steak with no seasoning and extra vegetables qualifies as a hardship.

It's funny how your tastes change too - I will sometimes "indulge" and eat the gluten-free bread they offer at Cooper's Hawk - always served piping hot with real butter (sooo good!!!) - my friend tried it and couldn't stop talking about how awful it was and how her normal pretzel bread was SOO much better and poor me for having to eat this other crap. Personally, I love the stuff! I hardly eat any starches anymore, so having any of that occasionally is a treat.

Thanks for the laugh! Needed that today!

Lizanne Newbie
Lizanne
Posted

So funny! ?thanks for sharing. It's almost 2 months for me since being diagnosed with Celiac disease and I am so surprised as to how little people understand what I have and what gluten is.

heather806 Rookie
heather806
Posted

At a restaurant last month:

Me: Do you have a gluten-free menu by any chance?

Waitress: Uh, no I don't think so, lemme ask my manager. <comes back> Sorry, he said we don't. But I can assure you that we don't use horse hooves in anything we make."

Me: uhh...horse hooves?

Waitress: I know gluten is made of horse's hooves...you know like in Jello. My friend is a vegetarian and she won't eat Jello.

Me: Ohhhhh! <Laughing way too hard for a second or two> You mean gelatin...

We then had a brief discussion of what gluten is and isn't in. lol She couldn't have been older than 18 or 19.

IrishHeart Veteran
IrishHeart
Posted

<snort> horse hooves.... :lol:

JNBunnie1 Community Regular
JNBunnie1
Posted

After a friend had been playing with the rolls, slicing them for sandwiches, he stuck his hands in the bacon that was being laid out on a pan. I noticed and informed him that that bacon was now out of bounds for me, and another friend says, 'Well, won't it just, like, cook off in the oven?' If that were the case, then I could eat BREAD. Getting hot doesn't magically make gluten disappear!

missmellie Newbie
missmellie
Posted

These are some great stories!! I've had quite a laugh. Thank you so much for sharing.

:lol:

  • 3 weeks later...
heather806 Rookie
heather806
Posted

These are some great stories!! I've had quite a laugh. Thank you so much for sharing.

:lol:

I yelped in the grocery aisle the other day. I was looking at a multivitamin's ingredients and the word "wheat" jumped out at me. I yelped and put that bottle back so fast you would have thought it was a hot potato. The woman a few feet away looked at me like I was insane. :lol:

But seriously, wheat in a freakin' multi-vitamin? Why!? lol

Finally-45 Contributor
Finally-45
Posted
  • Author

Gelatin! Funny!

No matter how hard you annunciate, someone will still think you're saying "glucose."

Me: I tried a gluten-free diet for a few weeks and then ate a cookie.... threw up and had horrible diarrhea....sick for days. I think I need a celiac test.

Nurse: What?

Me: You know, when people have to be on a gluten-free diet...

Nurse: Oh you want your blood sugar tested?!

Me: [Trying REALLY hard not be frustrated because at that point I was positive I had it, but needed an understanding ear from the doctor's office; I was absolutely miserable.] No, no, I'm saying, "gluten" not "glucose." If you tell the doctor I need a Celiac test, she'll know what I'm talking about.

Nurse: How do you spell that?

Me: C-E-L-I-A-C

Nurse: Spell that again.

Me: C-E-L-I-A-C

Nurse: Ok, I'll tell the doctor.

In the end, I did get a test and was officially diagnosed,and referred to a gastroenterologist, but that first interaction with the nurse always stayed with me.

Glad I can laugh about it NOW.

LauraB0927 Apprentice
LauraB0927
Posted

At a restaurant last month:

Me: Do you have a gluten-free menu by any chance?

Waitress: Uh, no I don't think so, lemme ask my manager. <comes back> Sorry, he said we don't. But I can assure you that we don't use horse hooves in anything we make."

Me: uhh...horse hooves?

Waitress: I know gluten is made of horse's hooves...you know like in Jello. My friend is a vegetarian and she won't eat Jello.

Me: Ohhhhh! <Laughing way too hard for a second or two> You mean gelatin...

We then had a brief discussion of what gluten is and isn't in. lol She couldn't have been older than 18 or 19.

Oh wow I think I just almost peed my pants!!!! I'm picturing a hoof on a menu with an X though it and seeing someone make a sigh of relief after reading it!!!

A couple weeks ago I went to Cluck-U chicken with my fiance because he had a craving for chicken wings. I was hungry but didnt plan on eating anything obviously because that place is over run by gluten. My fiance, feeling bad that I couldn't eat, asked the very young, naive girl at the counter if there was anything grilled and not breaded on the menu. He even asked about separate cooking areas. (I didn't care what they said, I wouldn't have eaten anything anyway) Of course she asked why and he explained that I can't have gluten and then did an abbreviated version of what gluten was.

Girl: (with a look of horror) "Oh my god honey, you poor thing! What DO you eat then???"

Fiance: (Jumping in because he KNEW where this was gonna go) "Oh she eats grilled chicken, steak, vegetables, nuts, and a lot of other things...."

Girl: "I feel so bad!! Here sweetie, let me go grab you an bowl of macaroni and cheese, on the house..."

I was yanked out of there so fast.... :)

IrishHeart Veteran
IrishHeart
Posted

I went to Cluck-U chicken with my fiance

wait a second....there's an actual place called CLUCK U chicken??

:lol: :lol:

brilliant

And your fiance sounds like a "keeper"! best wishes.

Finally-45 Contributor
Finally-45
Posted
  • Author
(I didn't care what they said, I wouldn't have eaten anything anyway)

Correct, Cluck U Chicken, just like pizza joints and bakeries, aren't worth the effort. You're sure to get a joke to share within 30 seconds of trying to order.

On the other hand, I went to a nice hot wing bar once that doesn't bread their wings and doesn't use corn products in their sauce. I must have seemed so happy and giddy that I bet the employees joked about ME. They could have put me in an ad and quadrupled their business.

heather806 Rookie
heather806
Posted

wait a second....there's an actual place called CLUCK U chicken??

:lol: :lol:

brilliant

And your fiance sounds like a "keeper"! best wishes.

Ditto on that! Cluck U? hahaha

Now I want mac and cheese though! :)

IrishHeart Veteran
IrishHeart
Posted

Ditto on that! Cluck U? hahaha

Now I want mac and cheese though! :)

:unsure: hmm, strangly, so do I.....

LauraB0927 Apprentice
LauraB0927
Posted

wait a second....there's an actual place called CLUCK U chicken??

:lol: :lol:

brilliant

And your fiance sounds like a "keeper"! best wishes.

Hahaha yes its called Cluck-U...since they're pretty standard around here I never realized how funny the name sounded until I saw all your reactions!!! And yes, he's a keeper - very protective over me with the gluten stuff and always tries to educate other people about Celiac...most of the time I dont even have to say a word! These people he talks to probably think that having Celiac also means being mute!!!

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Go to topic listing
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A19):

  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      132,868
    • Most Online (within 30 mins)
      7,748
    LMGarrison
    Newest Member
    LMGarrison
    Joined
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A20):
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A22):

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      121.5k
    • Total Posts
      1m
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A21):

  • Upcoming Events

  • Posts

    • knitty kitty
      High TTG-IgG and Normal TTG-IgA

      By knitty kitty · Posted

      @SamAlvi, It's common with anemia to have a lower tTg IgA antibodies than DGP IgG ones, but your high DGP IgG scores still point to Celiac disease.   Since a gluten challenge would pose further health damage, you may want to ask for a DNA test to see if you have any of the commonly known genes for Celiac disease.  Though having the genes for Celiac is not diagnostic in and of itself, taken with the antibody tests, the anemia and your reaction to gluten, it may be a confirmation you have Celiac disease.   Do discuss Gastrointestinal Beriberi with your doctors.  In Celiac disease, Gastrointestinal Beriberi is frequently overlooked by doctors.  The digestive system can be affected by localized Thiamine deficiency which causes symptoms consistent with yours.  Correction of nutritional deficiencies quickly is beneficial.  Benfotiamine, a form of thiamine, helps improve intestinal health.  All eight B vitamins, including Thiamine (Benfotiamine), should be supplemented because they all work together.   The B vitamins are needed in addition to iron to correct anemia.   Hope this helps!  Keep us posted on your progress!
    • trents
      High TTG-IgG and Normal TTG-IgA

      By trents · Posted

      Currently, there are no tests for NCGS. Celiac disease must first be ruled out and we do have testing for celiac disease. There are two primary test modalities for diagnosing celiac disease. One involves checking for antibodies in the blood. For the person with celiac disease, when gluten is ingested, it produces an autoimmune response in the lining of the small bowel which generates specific kinds of antibodies. Some people are IGA deficient and such that the IGA antibody tests done for celiac disease will have skewed results and cannot be trusted. In that case, there are IGG tests that can be ordered though, they aren't quite as specific for celiac disease as the IGA tests. But the possibility of IGA deficiency is why a "total IGA" test should always be ordered along with the TTG-IGA. The other modality is an endoscopy (scoping of the upper GI track) with a biopsy of the small bowel lining. The aforementioned autoimmune response produces inflammation in the small bowel lining which, over time, damages the structure of the lining. The biopsy is sent to a lab and microscopically analyzed for signs of this damage. If the damage is severe enough, it can often be spotted during the scoping itself. The endoscopy/biopsy is used as confirmation when the antibody results are positive, since there is a small chance that elevated antibody test scores can be caused by things other than celiac disease, particularly when the antibody test numbers are not particularly high. If the antibody test numbers are 10x normal or higher, physicians will sometimes declare an official diagnosis of celiac disease without an endoscopy/biopsy, particularly in the U.K. Some practitioners use stool tests to detect celiac disease but this modality is not widely recognized in the medical community as valid. Both celiac testing modalities outlined above require that you have been consuming generous amounts of gluten for weeks/months ahead of time. Many people make the mistake of experimenting with the gluten free diet or even reducing their gluten intake prior to testing. By doing so, they invalidate the testing because antibodies stop being produced, disappear from the blood and the lining of the small bowel begins to heal. So, then they are stuck in no man's land, wondering if they have celiac disease or NCGS. To resume gluten consumption, i.e., to undertake a "gluten challenge" is out of the question because their reaction to gluten is so strong that it would endanger their health. The lining of the small bowel is the place where all of the nutrition in the food we consume is absorbed. This lining is made up of billions of microscopically tiny fingerlike projections that create a tremendous nutrient absorption surface area. The inflammation caused by celiac disease wears down these fingers and greatly reduces the surface area needed for nutrient absorption. Thus, people with celiac disease often develop iron deficiency anemia and a host of other vitamin and mineral deficiencies. It is likely that many more people who have issues with gluten suffer from NCGS than from celiac disease. We actually know much more about the mechanism of celiac disease than we do about NCGS but some experts believe NCGS can transition into celiac disease.
    • SamAlvi
      High TTG-IgG and Normal TTG-IgA

      By SamAlvi · Posted

      Thank you for the clarification and for taking the time to explain the terminology so clearly. I really appreciate your insight, especially the distinction between celiac disease and NCGS and how anemia can point more toward celiac. This was very helpful for me.
    • Jsingh
      Son's legs shaking

      By Jsingh · Posted

      Hi,  My 7 year daughter has complained of this in the past, which I thought were part of her glutening symptom, but more recently I have come to figure out it's part of her histamine overload symptom. This one symptom was part of her broader profile, which included irritability, extreme hunger, confusion, post-nasal drip. You might want to look up "histamine intolerance". I wish I had known of this at the time of her diagnosis, life would have been much easier.  I hope you are able to figure out. 
    • lizzie42
      Son's legs shaking

      By lizzie42 · Posted

      My 5yo was diagnosed with celiac last year by being tested after his sister was diagnosed. We are very strict on the gluten-free diet, but unsure what his reactions are as he was diagnosed without many symptoms other than low ferritin.  He had a school party where his teacher made gluten-free gingerbread men. I almost said no because she made it in her kitchen but I thought it would be ok.  Next day and for a few after his behavior is awful. Hitting, rude, disrespectful. Mainly he kept saying his legs were shaking. Is this a gluten exposure symptom that anyone else gets? Also the bad behavior? 
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

NOTICE: This site places This site places cookies on your device (Cookie settings). on your device. Continued use is acceptance of our Terms of Use, and Privacy Policy.