Get your affairs in order

[bartfull]

Hmm...my affairs in order. OK. Alan on Sunday, Bob on Monday, Steve on Tuesday...Oh, not those affairs.

OK, now that I've softened things with a lame joke, the doctor really did say that. Turns out I have terminal cancer. Lymph. "Very advanced". They say they can't cure me but they might (MIGHT) be able to prolong my life.

No thanks. There's a reason they tear a bandage off fast instead of going slowly. Fast might hurt but only for a second. Slowly hurts for a long time. And as far as I'm concerned they wouldn't just be prolonging my life but they'd be prolonging my suffering. I'm just going to let things follow their course. I've got pain meds, I've got a ton of loving friends who will do anything they can to help me. I'll get Hospice in later when the time comes. It's all good.

Jarrett is going to take over the shop for me and even though it's just ego, it's nice to know the thing I started will carry on after I'm gone. Bonnie is my best friend who brought me and Patches together and she has promised she'll find him yet another good home.

And I'm happier and more at peace than I've been in a long time. No more wondering. And when I leave here I'll be going home to God. What could be better?

There really are much worse things than a diagnosis of terminal cancer. There was a guy who used to come by on his motorized chair and talk to me sometimes. His fingers were so twisted with arthritis he couldn't get in or out of bed, he couldn't dress himself, cook, or even blow his nose without help or extreme pain. And he went on like that for YEARS. Nope, what I've got is so much easier.

Anyway, you know how sometimes people disappear from an internet forum and you wonder what ever happened to them? Well I didn't want you to wonder about me. And I want to thank everybody here for the good advice and the many friendships I've developed. I may chime in again if I think I can be of help to someone, but for the most part I'm going to lay low. You don't need a blow-by-blow account of my progress and I won't burden you with it.

So yeah, thanks and great big (((((HUGS))))) to you all.

[ravenwoodglass]

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

You will be missed. You have been a great help to many. Sorry you got such news.

[kareng]

Oh!  Barty!  I am so sorry!  I will miss you.  I loved to think of you in your store.  You always sounded so happy there.  I had hoped to stop in some time. 

 

thank you for letting us know

Edited March 4, 2016 by kareng

[GottaSki]

Karen lit the super silly signal....I'm thankful she did.

So very sorry to read this news.

You sound at peace which shows what a remarkable person you are....you will be missed by those you've helped as well as those whom have shared time with you... in the real world or through our keyboards.

Many hugs for all your days left on this rock...and when it's time to go, please send one up to Shroomie for me : )

Ad Astra Dear Bartie.

 

 

[icelandgirl]

I'm so very sad to hear this.  You will be greatly missed.  You've been a wonderful source of comfort and inspiration to many...myself included.  Thank you for everything you've done for us all.  I'm crying typing this....so hard to hear.  I do hope you continue to chime in...your wisdom is invaluable. 

Love and (((((((((((hugs)))))))))))

[notme]

o, barty, what can i say :((((((((  i am so sad :((((((((((  won't you at least try treatment :(((((  my daughter's boyfriend was dx/d  w/lymphoma stage 4 and that was 5 years ago and he is fine.......  :/  they are doing magical things with meds/treatments lots of new stuff ???

[squirmingitch]

Dear Barty,

Dear Barty, dear Barty, dear Barty, dear Barty. I love you. I will remember you. Whenever I think of you, I think of you in your store, happy, with lovely music filling the air, or at home with Patches in your lap and you feeding him from a spoon. I will always think of you these ways.

You will go to your reward from your beloved Black Hills and you will go home and you will be with your dearest husband again.

Godspeed friend!

[jerseyangel]

Hi Bartfull,  just popped over to say I wish you peace.  I remember you as such a positive presence on this board.  

[Irene Joanne]

Oh I'm so sorry to hear that! In the short time I've been on this site- I've been so grateful for your help! I've learned a lot from reading some of your old posts too! 

Thankyou for the time and effort you've given here? God bless! 

[Lisa]

Bartfull, I have always admired your attitude and even more so now.  I hope you are surrounded by family, great friends and enjoy every day to your fullest.

[GFinDC]

I am sorry to hear that Bartfull.  But there is definitely a better place to be than here.  I said a prayer for you in Jesus name.  I hope you enjoy your time remaining here.  It's been great having you around the forum helping us out.

[Gemini]

I cannot imagine this forum without our bartfull.    You are such an integral part and always dispensed the very best advice. I always admired your attitude regarding the challenges that were thrown at you and am so grateful for all the great posts you made. Your acceptance and peace are amazing and to be admired. God Bless you and know how loved you are here. You are one special soul.

[manasota]

Bartfull,

I agree with and fully endorse your choices in how you plan to navigate the end of your life.  Smart woman.  That said, I will really miss your words and energy on this site.  Even though I've only been here for a short time, your news made me cry.

I hope I have as much notice as you when my death comes.  I want to avoid (as much as possible) the medical system when it's my time to die.  I worked in a hospital and saw many people who were not as fortunate.

I wish you peace, independence, and freedom from pain while you navigate the end of what has obviously been a wonderful life.  You have won the most wonderful gift--the love of so many people.

I send my love to you also.

Beverly

 

[IrishHeart]

Dear A.

You've always been one of my favorite people on here. I admire your courage, humor, and great faith. I have always pictured you enjoying your guitar shop, your kitty, and your home because you always told me how much they gave you pleasure. You've been an inspiration to me and to so many others on here during the last few years and you've helped more people than you may ever realize. That's your gift.

It doesn't surprise me that you're facing this final challenge with the same grace that you've handled everything else thrown in your path. My first response last night when Karen told me your news was "well F you, celiac, quit  taking our peeps!" (because you know I shoot from the hip) but as I read your words this morning one more time, I can see that you've already decided to handle this last challenge with the same "Barty attitude" that I admire so much. 

You're a true warrior princess and I agree with Gemini: You are one special soul and I am so glad our paths crossed. 

xoxo

G. 

[cyclinglady]

Bartful, 

Like Scarett O'Hara, I decided to "Think about it tomorrow." in the hopes that I could write a response that would best describe my feelings and thoughts. Well, a few days have passed and it is not getting any easier!  

I respect your decision regarding your healthcare and  I am so sorry that this is happening to you.  You will be missed here as you offered such common-sense advice.  

It is funny, but on the day you posted, my newly-retired neighbor approached me about OLLI which is a group of learners at our local university.  He plays guitar in a garage rock band but wanted to learn classical guitar.  I offered to take him to campus to enroll in our classical guitar class.  Ron and I talked about our love of music and that you are never to old to learn!   I play my flute in an Orchestra and concert band with the members who are as old as 92 (yep, Deseree sits on her walker to maintain the beat on her bass drum!).   But I digresss......what I am trying to say is that you will live on in our memories and hearts each time we pick up our instruments, pet our furry friends or read another label to make sure it does not contain gluten (I will always recall your ice cream experience).  

Love and hugs!  

[SLLRunner]

Bartfull, I am fairly new here, but I am at a loss for words. You are an incredibly brave person. I send love, light, and many hugs your way.

[cristiana]

Bartfull

Thank you for all the help and encouragement that you have given so many people on this site.  

God bless you.

xxxxxx

[LookingforAnswers15]

Dear Bartfull, 

I can't even find words to describe how sorry I am to hear this. I am at a loss for words. Thank you for all the support that you gave to me and others on this forum. God bless you. Hugs.

[StephanieL]

Thank you so much for all you have contributed and all the people you have helped. 

Know you are in my thoughts!

[squirmingitch]

Our dearest Bartful - Alison - went to her heavenly rest on May 21, 2016. She was 61.

She was so much more than statistics. She was kind, generous, loving, giving and understanding. She gave everything of herself and never asked for anything for herself. 

Rest in peace dear Alison.

[ravenwoodglass]

Thank you for letting us know this sad news.  She was always ready to lend a kind ear and comfort to those here that needed it. She has been and will continue to be missed.

[icelandgirl]

Thank you so much for letting us know.  ((((((Hugs))))))

Alison has been on my mind a lot lately.  It's amazing how much you can miss someone you've never met...but she was an exceptional person who had a positive impact on everyone.  She was kind and wise...I'll always miss her presence.

I am thankful that she is no longer in pain and that she is now with her beloved husband and parents.

[cristiana]

A brave, kind lady.  She helped so many people.

[jerseyangel]

May she rest in peace.

[manasota]

Thank you so much for letting us know.   Bartfull's calming optimistic peace will be missed.