More Ranting...

[num1habsfan]

OK, I have a one hour break in between classes now, so I thought I'd come into the study lounge, steal a computer, and write this up.

During the middle of this last class I seriously had to leave the room to go to the bathroom, because the pains caught me so bad that I couldnt even breathe already...

Soooo painful.

And I seriously had to cry, I couldnt help it. I just sat in the bathroom and cried.

really, how am I going to get thru school this way if I have to keep missing class time to do anything to get rid of pain and then not embarass myself in front of everyone???

I had to deal with this all before (except I wasnt in school)...and the last time it was only a month and a half of pain, and at least that time they had an idea of what was wrong..

I've been like this(and getting worse) since January 28th, so almost 2 months already..

Ahhhhhh

I know I complain about this so much, and I'm so sorry..nobody else seems to want to listen to me anymore.....

~lisa~

[Guest nini]

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS Lisa}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}} I'm sorry it's so hard for you right now, I wish I had some words of wisdom for you, but I don't. Just some much needed cyber hugs... wish I could give you a real hug.

[key]

LIsa,

Have they checked you for Crohns disease or anything else other then celiac. I'm not doubting that you have celiac in anyway of course, but you sound miserable still. How long have you been dealing with this. People with some inflammatory bowel disease sometimes need Prednisone, etc. I really don't know what you are dealing with or your history, but I am assuming you aren't getting gluten. How long have you been dealing with Celiac? Are you sure the food you are eating is gluten free? I am sorry you are so miserable.

Hugs,

Monica

[Carriefaith]

I'm sorry that you were at school when you were in pain. That has happened to me so I can sympathize. If you find that you are getting worse, I would suggest getting allergy and/or intolerance testing done and I would also suggest getting tested for chron's disease.

[jerseyangel]

I agree with everyone--when you FINALLY get in to see the GI, have ready a list of things you want checked out. I know you have a hard time getting into a doctor. You know you can come in here anytime and rant--we are concerned about you. I feel so bad about what happened at school. I had to quit a job that I loved because of my symptoms. I know you don't have that option--I'm sending good thoughts and a hug out to you

[Judyin Philly]

Hang in there Lisa,

We're praying for you.

Your a tough lady.

Judy in Philly

[penguin]

I missed lots of class because of horrible pain...so I know where you're coming from! It sucks, sorry...

If you're missing class anyway, sit and moan in the GI's waiting room

Sorry you feel so crappy, I hope you find relief soon!

[Mahee34]

lisa i'm in the same position as you......i've missed class all the time because of pain and getting sick, to the point that people think i'm a hypochondriac. i finally went back to the GI and said do everything and anything you can because i'm following my gluten free diet strictly and still not doing well. so i figured something else was wrong......don't worry you aren't alone!!! hang in there and keep the immodium handy

[num1habsfan]

Thanks, guys.

Mahee, Chelse, CarrieFaith, thanks for saying that you've gone thru it too...you must know how hard it is to concentrate on the tests, and I am sure you all had the problem of having your marks drop dramatically...

Honestly, tonight during class, one of the girls that I basically never talk to, followed me out into the hallway to ask me if I was feeling ago,because I looked sick and in pain. So if people that barely even talk to me can notice, you know it must be bad.

I used to be friends with a guy who has Crohns, and my friend's husband kinda knows this old friend of mine, but I guess he happened to be in Manitoba now, so I dont know how I could possibly find him to talk to.

And I was on Prednisone, twice...and that only made me feel worse and would only last for a few hours than the pains would be right back (that IBS was the first thing they checked me for).

And then they dont believe that I'm not pregnant, so they always ask me if I am still having my time-of-the-month, etc. That answer doesnt change (and no, it has not skipped during these painful couple of months)

I can tell you something that made me feel better tonight...I talked to a guy, one amazing friend, who I havent talked to in 3 months...and he sat there concerned/worried, and let me tell him EVERY detail of being sick...and I told him "i bet your ears are getting sore from me talking already"...he assured me, that no, it was fine.

NOw its going to be so nice that I can keep in touch with him, and tell him whatever is wrong...

*sighs* ... if only he could take away the pain...

~lisa~

[plantime]

{{{{hugs}}}}

By all means, come here and complain. We understand how you feel, and I, for one, will listen. Sometimes just having someone to tell it to helps!

[Nantzie]

I'm glad your friend is so supportive and understanding. And you can always come here to vent. I can't imagine how you're going through this day after day. You're one tough chick!

{{{{HUGS}}}}

Nancy

[dlp252]

Wow, I'm so sorry you have to go through this...not only the pain but the frustration and helplessness. Big cyber hugs!! {{{{{hugs}}}}}

[num1habsfan]

Thanks *hugs everyone back*.

I wish they could be real hugs!

i felt like such an idiot yesterday, having to leave class because I was having an allergic reaction just to someone flouring a cake pan for their demonstration in school.

My eyes started burning, skin was itching, felt like I was going to sneeze.

So i had to leave the class and go rinse my eyes out in the bathroom, while everyone else in the room is sitting there eating cake.

I told the substitute teacher we've got for that class that if anybody else is doing baking I have to leave the room because of my allergy to flour. She was OK with it (but a little surprised that there was such a thing)

OK well thats all for now. I shut up

~lisa~

[Carriefaith]

Mahee, Chelse, CarrieFaith, thanks for saying that you've gone thru it too...you must know how hard it is to concentrate on the tests, and I am sure you all had the problem of having your marks drop dramatically...

I used to get severe stomach pain while I was working on my master's (I believe the pain was from gluten). One incident lasted almost two weeks and the other was only for a day. The pain would hit with no warning while I was at university and it was so intense that I couldn't move sometimes and I could hardley breathe (Very embarassing when you're in front of other people). Once I locked myself in a room for about half an hour until the pain went away. I haven't had pain like that in almost a year now and I hope that I never experience it again.

I really hope that you find out what is wrong and can start feeling better soon. Being in pain is no fun.

[num1habsfan]

talk about feeling like an idiot...

My teacher is still out with a busted leg, (and she had broke her right leg, so she cant drive into school), so we've been having to deal with 4 different substitutes.

Well, today we saw 3 of those substitutes (the 3 who know nothing about me being sick)...and OK my regular teacher, she knows that I have to go to the bathroom a zillion times a day during class, and just continues with her talking. So I left a good few times during classes today, like i always do, and the substituess STOPPED what they are talking about or teaching until I was out of the door or back in my chair. And I was the only one leaving for several minutes and several times.

It made me feel so odd!!

And then, I ate lunch in the classroom (there was like nobody in there anyways) and I wanted to cry so badly. Like really, each time I swallow my stomach both makes noise AND moves..I can definitely feel my intestines react. I've tried light food, heavy food, nothing makes a difference at all. Even vegetables make my stomach talk.

Once today I had to sit in the bathroom stall for longer than planned, just to let some of the pains go away so I could go back to class without crying.

One of my friends tonight, I was talking to him on MSN, and this is what he said to me:

him: hey lisa

him: i know what it feels like to be an out cast cause of a medical condition of lord do i know

him: except mine is allready gone i still know now how hard it is to tell someone

him: i commend you for being so strong

Another friend just told me this:

him: i dont know what to say

him: i guess you just have to keep being tough and keep trying

him: but its gotta be hard...I dont even have any idea how you will be feeling

am I REALLY that strong??? Because I sure dont feel like it..

~lisa~

[plantime]

Yes, you are that strong. You just don't notice it because you see so much of your own weakness. Many of the people I know would not even go to class if they hurt that bad, they would just stay home and in bed. You continue to persevere, that is what makes you strong.

[num1habsfan]

OMG all this talk about being strong, I dont feel very strong right now

I had such a horrible day right from the morning..I had to miss the day of school (the 2 classes i was supposed to go to) because I could NOT find a ride into school at all, then I felt sooooo crappy all day that I barely ate even and just cried during random times of the day from it.

added:

I discovered that my uncle asked my auntie if she could drive me to school (she was doing nothing today) and she told me to get my license *insert mean words here*

So, I text message that amazing friend I was telling you all about, and he said that I could call him tonight if I wanted to.

So i kept doing my homework, felt productive, then my parents came home and freaked out on me that I should have been cleaning my room and the house, regardless of what homework I had...

So i got really upset and basically had an asthma attack (I had to take my inhaler)..

THEN I thought, OK, this will get better...I'll talk to the friend, he'll make me feel better like he always does and calm my nerves before my presentation tomorrow...

WRONG ALL WRONG. There was no answer...

I think i'll just go back to my crying now (from pain, and sadness!)..

~lisa~

[Nantzie]

Oh sweetie, I'm so sorry you had such an awful day.

{{{HUGS}}} for you.

Nancy

[key]

Lisa,

Sorry you are not feeling well. If you need to vent just come here. Your parents seem to be very insensitive to say the least! They should be cleaning your room for you if you can't eat and are that sick. What is up with them?? Ok, it just makes me upset at how you are treated. I don't know how you go to class with the stomach problems you have been having, so you are definitely strong. Everyone has a breaking point though and you sound like you might be about there. I don't know what to tell you, but I wish that you had some support somewhere.

HUGS,

MOnica

[jerseyangel]

Lisa--I can imagine how hard it is for you to stay strong, considering. That is a lot of weight on your young shoulders. I'm sending you good thoughts and hugs--please always feel free to come here and talk to us--we care about you

[plantime]

Whew, your aunt sounds like a real piece of work! Something probably came up with your friend, don't sweat that one. You can always come on here and talk to us!

[num1habsfan]

Thank you everyone, again..for you hugs and thoughts. Really means a lot.

I'm waiting for something good to happen in my life, honestly. Yesterday I found out that I cant go for the career plan I have chosen because ONE CLASS doesnt meet the standards. In college now, you need a 60% to pass. Well, my one class i got 61%, so i thought you know, great, I passed, I can still further my education. well i CANT. Because I'd like to be a CGA (general accountant), and the lady who came to do a bit of a presentation on it said its EVERY single class you need 65%. so that ONE CLASS, because of that small 4% difference, I am stuck with the choice of retaking the class (which would NOT be fun), or choose another career

I did talk to my good friend last night (he said he fell asleep early tuesday night so its why he didnt answer). He let me rant about the whole school issue and being sick, and it was so nice that anytime I asked for his opinion on something I never had to repeat--he listened to every word I said in the 45 minutes we talked <3 ... I also told him about everyone saying I am strong, and asked if he agreed..he said "yeah" very convincely, and said that if he was in my situation, he'd never get out of bed..

On monday I am going to try a new thing, not eat until after 4:30 p.m., until AFTER my quiz. I know this material really well, its really clicked for me, but I dont want to fail because of stomach pains .. I will let you guys know if my idea works.

I'm just ready for a new week...or a new life!!

~lisa~

[plantime]

Lisa, a General Accountant, hey?!? I am working on a B of S in Accounting for my degree. I take my classes online, at Colorado Tech. I had my first classes today, and I am pretty excited! I have discovered that I love numbers and the stories they tell!

[TCA]

Have you thought about videotaping the classes? I know it would be much better to be able to stay in there, but for those times when you do get sick, you wouldn't really miss anything. I used to take some classes by video and it was great because you could just rewind what you missed! You could just set it up on a tripod in the back of the room and no one would know the difference. I do hope it's not an issue soon, though. Good luck!

[penguin]

I know you're in Canada, so I don't know what your disability laws are, but at my university in the states, people took notes for the disabled (mostly blind and deaf) or those who were too sick. Every university here has a disabilites office, I imagine Canada is the same, talk to them and see if you have any options from that angle. Other than that, the video thing is a good idea or have a friend use a tape recorder, if the prof will allow it.