Jump to content
  • Welcome to Celiac.com!

    You have found your celiac tribe! Join us and ask questions in our forum, share your story, and connect with others.


  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A1):
    Celiac.com Sponsor (A1-M):
  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Our Content
    eNewsletter
    Donate

The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original


TriticusToxicum

Recommended Posts

TriticusToxicum Explorer
After, that is, I scoop up the yeti poop in my back yard.

Will this be turning up on eBay? :ph34r:

High value stuff from what I've read. :P


Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):



Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):



  • Replies 51k
  • Created
  • Last Reply
TriticusToxicum Explorer
How is that for gardening? Or maybe keeping deer away?

...and what of the logistics? Does one need a shovel? A trowel? Or is a grocery bag inside-outed on one's hand sufficient? :huh:

DingoGirl Enthusiast
How is that for gardening? Or maybe keeping deer away?

Yeti poop, in case you don't know, is a useful garden mulch and smells of Froot Loops.

Alas - deer not a problem here, 'tis a gated community adn they don't know the code.

:lol:

Will this be turning up on eBay? :ph34r:

High value stuff from what I've read. :P

Yes, ebay possibly after I fashion it into a shape......it's not unlike Spam for moUlding marvelous sculptures.

TriticusToxicum Explorer
Yes, ebay possibly after I fashion it into a shape......it's not unlike Spam for moUlding marvelous sculptures.

I can see the exhbit now...Scat as an interpretive artform. Look out Paris! Make room at the LouvRe!

elye Community Regular
I can see the exhbit now...Scat as an interpretive artform. Look out Paris! Make room at the LouvRe!

Having been to the Pompidou and seeing some truly...fascinating..."interpretive" art exhibits, I'd say it's likely been done.

Actually, poop has appeared in some of the post-Modern guys' works. Pollock comes to mind, and Van Gogh was known to incorporate some strange materials into his canvases. :huh::o

Let's take an enviornmentally responsible course here, and use any yeti poop as confetti when the lovebirds leave the church. What say you, Amanda? Will your dress be scotchguarded? A lovely bit of symbolism, here, as well...the secret magic of the stuff, festooned on the young lovers for posterity...

Now, if we follow the train of thought that has run through our parade dialogue...Let The Yeti Lead...hey! He's gotta be the first one down the aisle. Someone's gotta teach him to walk the aisle-walk...no furtive, forest-stamping stuff. This is a church!

I, also, would be happy to measure the yeti for his tux. Inseam measurement causes no fear, here. It's when the neck measurement needs taking...anywhere around those teeth... :o

DingoGirl Enthusiast

oh yes, fabulous idea, SCATtering the yeti confetti onto the newlyweds.

That gave me a little snort, and it's a good thing - I am on day two of crankiness, boredom, and ennui. :mellow:

Say something funny, everyone.

:lol:

Darn210 Enthusiast
Say something funny, everyone.

NO!


Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):



Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):



Ridgewalker Contributor
NO!

:lol:

-Sarah

Jestgar Rising Star

We have a twenty-something who just started working in the lab as a fill in after finishing university (somebody's friend's kid) and I just traumatized him by informing that no, he didn't get paid to eat lunch.

The next big shocker will be the "no, you don't get paid to sip lattes in the lunch room".

How can anyone be so uninformed?

Darn210 Enthusiast

In response to Richard's pirate - I've decided to counter with one of my own!!!!

You're next Sarah - I've got a Darth Vader, too!! - Just not sure where I put him at the moment . . .

elye Community Regular

Okay, upon thinking further on this...

When I hear the word "scat", I think of small animal droppings, i.e., that of a mouse, cat, rabbit, etc. This, I am certain, folks, will not be scat. Our yeti is rumoured in legend to be over eight feet tall. So, we're talking about another whole category of fecal matter. We will have enough confetti for several weddings and a couple of bar mitzfahs. Anyone got any other events coming up that require special confetti? :lol:

tom Contributor
Alas - deer not a problem here, 'tis a gated community adn they don't know the code.

:lol:

Unless the code is "howhighcanyoujump", they're 'scat outta luck'.

Yes, ebay possibly after I fashion it into a shape......it's not unlike Spam for moUlding marvelous sculptures.

Gaaaaah!!! I didn't even GO to the site and still dislike any reminder of ratemypoo.com!!

thouse dang U's pop up EVERYwhere!!

Now, if we follow the train of thought that has run through our parade dialogue...Let The Yeti Lead...hey! He's gotta be the first one down the aisle. Someone's gotta teach him to walk the aisle-walk...no furtive, forest-stamping stuff. This is a church!

:lol: :lol:

oh yes, fabulous idea, SCATtering the yeti confetti onto the newlyweds.

That gave me a little snort, and it's a good thing - I am on day two of crankiness, boredom, and ennui. :mellow:

In the 80s, a little snort took care of the rest.

Yeti Confetti, that magical stuff.

When poopy's froot-loopy, one can't get enough.

In ceremony solemn,

Parading in column,

A Yeti well-fed he's happy not gruff.

(Feel free to replace lame last line!! :D )

tho I like that "well-fed he" rhymed w/ confetti :P

Jestgar Rising Star
Unless the code is "howhighcanyoujump", they're 'scat outta luck'.

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Yeti Confetti, that magical stuff.

When poopy's froot-loopy, one can't get enough.

In ceremony solemn,

Parading in column,

A Yeti well-fed he's happy not gruff.

(Feel free to replace lame last line!! :D )

tho I like that "well-fed he" rhymed w/ confetti :P

excellent work.

Darn210 Enthusiast
Okay, upon thinking further on this...

When I hear the word "scat", I think of small animal droppings, i.e., that of a mouse, cat, rabbit, etc. This, I am certain, folks, will not be scat. Our yeti is rumoured in legend to be over eight feet tall. So, we're talking about another whole category of fecal matter. We will have enough confetti for several weddings and a couple of bar mitzfahs. Anyone got any other events coming up that require special confetti? :lol:

You know, we could always use it in the parade . . . they usually toss candy or beads . . . we can have MJ throw it out . . . he's already wearing gloves and a mask.

Darn210 Enthusiast

I believe you did a fabulous job as is . . . but since you've thrown out a challenge . . .

Yeti Confetti, that magical stuff.

When poopy's froot-loopy, one can't get enough.

In ceremony solemn,

Parading in column,

A Yeti well-fed . . .

. . .he's not so tough

. . . he's up to snuff

. . . he's lookin' buff (Open Original Shared Link :o )

DingoGirl Enthusiast
The next big shocker will be the "no, you don't get paid to sip lattes in the lunch room".

How can anyone be so uninformed?

I think you are dealing w/ that new breed of youth, who have helicopter parents and have this enormous attitude of entitlement? :huh:

I believe you did a fabulous job as is . . . but since you've thrown out a challenge . . .

. . . he's lookin' buff (Open Original Shared Link :o )

oh my gawd!! where did you find that Yeti we can shave????????????????????????

:lol:

the perfect activity for the time-waster.

Alas, I have decided just to take a trip to the dentist today, just for fun:

Open Original Shared Link

Jestgar Rising Star

"Deputy Attorney General Jeffrey Phillips gave Lew three new complaints, including one from a 31-year-old woman who said Anderson fondled her at least six times over two years."

Why did she keep going back?

Darn210 Enthusiast
oh my gawd!! where did you find that Yeti we can shave????????????????????????

:lol:

Google is a wonderful thing :P

DingoGirl Enthusiast
"Deputy Attorney General Jeffrey Phillips gave Lew three new complaints, including one from a 31-year-old woman who said Anderson fondled her at least six times over two years."

Why did she keep going back?

now WTH kind of question is that?

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Darn210 Enthusiast
"Deputy Attorney General Jeffrey Phillips gave Lew three new complaints, including one from a 31-year-old woman who said Anderson fondled her at least six times over two years."

Why did she keep going back?

I was just getting ready to post that . . . you beat me to it!!

Hmmmm, they didn't show his picture . . . maybe he's hung like a yeti! (OK, that's a bit crude for me, you guys must be a bad influence on me!)

tom Contributor

Holy Yeti Droppings my brain took a serious blow at the bank. A heavy perfuming :(

It wasn't even MY teller, but a neighboring one who came over to help. :(

I should've just left & driven the 4 or 5 mi to the Mesa branch. :(

Wish I knew how long this'll last. :(

Jestgar Rising Star
now WTH kind of question is that?

Hmmmm, they didn't show his picture . . . maybe he's hung like a yeti!

I guess that answers THAT question

:lol: :lol:

Mtndog Collaborator

OMG- I cannot believe Amanda is going to let this parade at her wedding with Yeti Poop, Care Bears, wayne Newton and what not! Emily measuring the Yeti for his tux- methinks she wants to fully investigate inseam :ph34r:

I could use the leftover scat :rolleyes: as decor for Halloween!!!!!!!!! Perhaps advertise it as brownies for those gluttonous gluten eaters at my next party.

Boy that Yeti sure looks better if we DON'T SHAVE him!!!! OMG...reminds me of frisking the wookie. Emily- I KNOW you were here for that. Must find it!!! Oh..here it is:Open Original Shared Link

now shall we think of all the innuendos that shaving your yeti brings? :lol: :lol: :lol:

Hug like a yeti :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: OMG.

Yeti Confetti, that magical stuff.

When poopy's froot-loopy, one can't get enough.

In ceremony solemn,

Parading in column,

A Yeti well-fed he's happy not gruff.

:lol: :lol: :lol: YETI POETRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There once was a Yeti from Spain

His inseam was giant it was claimed

Yet when Emily measured him

It accidentally pleasured him

And now he no longer

Complains!

DingoGirl Enthusiast
Hmmmm, they didn't show his picture . . . maybe he's hung like a yeti! (OK, that's a bit crude for me, you guys must be a bad influence on me!)

:o WHAT? WHO?

US???????

*snigger*

OMG all sorts of Yeti poetry........

good work sillies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Back to drudgery.

HARRUMPH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:angry:

blueeyedmanda Community Regular

I absolutely love you guys! This thread is what is keeping me from losing my mind on all the wedding stuff :)

So the wedding is beach theme so could we have someone in the parade hand out shell necklaces?

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Celiac.com:
    Join eNewsletter
    Donate

  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A17):
    Celiac.com Sponsor (A17):





    Celiac.com Sponsors (A17-M):




  • Recent Activity

    1. - Wheatwacked replied to Scott Adams's topic in Post Diagnosis, Recovery & Treatment of Celiac Disease
      50

      Supplements for those Diagnosed with Celiac Disease

    2. - knitty kitty replied to catnapt's topic in Celiac Disease Pre-Diagnosis, Testing & Symptoms
      3

      results from 13 day gluten challenge - does this mean I can't have celiac?

    3. - knitty kitty replied to Scott Adams's topic in Post Diagnosis, Recovery & Treatment of Celiac Disease
      50

      Supplements for those Diagnosed with Celiac Disease

    4. - Florence Lillian replied to Jane02's topic in Gluten-Free Foods, Products, Shopping & Medications
      11

      Desperately need a vitamin D supplement. I've reacted to most brands I've tried.

    5. - catnapt replied to catnapt's topic in Celiac Disease Pre-Diagnosis, Testing & Symptoms
      3

      results from 13 day gluten challenge - does this mean I can't have celiac?

  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A19):
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      133,355
    • Most Online (within 30 mins)
      7,748

    Amy Immerman
    Newest Member
    Amy Immerman
    Joined
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A20):
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A22):
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      121.6k
    • Total Posts
      1m
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A21):
  • Who's Online (See full list)

  • Upcoming Events

  • Posts

    • Wheatwacked
      Raising you vitamin D will increase absorption of calcium automatically without supplementation of calcium.  A high PTH can be caused by low D causing poor calcium absorption; not insuffient calcium intake.  With low D your body is not absorbing calcium from your food so it steals it from your bones.  Heart has priority over bone. I've been taking 10,000 IU D3 a day since 2015.  My doctor says to continue. To fix my lactose intolerance, lots of lactobacillus from yogurts, and brine fermented pickles and saurkraut and olives.  We lose much of our ability to make lactase endogenosly with maturity but a healthy colony of lactobacillus in our gut excretes lactase in exchange for room and board. The milk protein in grass fed milk does not bother me. It tastes like the milk I grew up on.  If I drink commercial milk I get heartburn at night. Some experts estimate that 90% of us do not eat Adequite Intake of choline.  Beef and eggs are the principle source. Iodine deficiency is a growing concern.  I take 600 mcg a day of Liquid Iodine.  It and NAC have accelerated my healing all over.  Virtually blind in my right eye after starting antihypertensive medication and vision is slowly coming back.  I had to cut out starches because they drove my glucose up into the 200+ range.  I replaced them with Red Bull for the glucose intake with the vitamins, minerals and Taurine needed to process through the mitochodria Krebs Cycle to create ATP.  Went from A1c 13 down to 7.9.  Work in progress. Also take B1,B2,B3,B5,B6. Liquid Iodine, Phosphatidyl Choline, Q10, Selenium, D and DHEA.     Choline supplemented as phosphatidylcholine decreases fasting and postmethionine-loading plasma homocysteine concentrations in healthy men +    
    • knitty kitty
      @catnapt, Wheat germ has very little gluten in it.  Gluten is  the carbohydrate storage protein, what the flour is made from, the fluffy part.  Just like with beans, there's the baby plant that will germinate  ("germ"-inate) if sprouted, and the bean part is the carbohydrate storage protein.   Wheat germ is the baby plant inside a kernel of wheat, and bran is the protective covering of the kernel.   Little to no gluten there.   Large amounts of lectins are in wheat germ and can cause digestive upsets, but not enough Gluten to provoke antibody production in the small intestines. Luckily you still have time to do a proper gluten challenge (10 grams of gluten per day for a minimum of two weeks) before your next appointment when you can be retested.    
    • knitty kitty
      Hello, @asaT, I'm curious to know whether you are taking other B vitamins like Thiamine B1 and Niacin B3.  Malabsorption in Celiac disease affects all the water soluble B vitamins and Vitamin C.  Thiamine and Niacin are required to produce energy for all the homocysteine lowering reactions provided by Folate, Cobalamine and Pyridoxine.   Weight gain with a voracious appetite is something I experienced while malnourished.  It's symptomatic of Thiamine B1 deficiency.   Conversely, some people with thiamine deficiency lose their appetite altogether, and suffer from anorexia.  At different periods on my lifelong journey, I suffered this, too.   When the body doesn't have sufficient thiamine to turn food, especially carbohydrates, into energy (for growth and repair), the body rations what little thiamine it has available, and turns the carbs into fat, and stores it mostly in the abdomen.  Consuming a high carbohydrate diet requires additional thiamine to process the carbs into energy.  Simple carbohydrates (sugar, white rice, etc.) don't contain thiamine, so the body easily depletes its stores of Thiamine processing the carbs into fat.  The digestive system communicates with the brain to keep eating in order to consume more thiamine and other nutrients it's not absorbing.   One can have a subclinical thiamine insufficiency for years.  A twenty percent increase in dietary thiamine causes an eighty percent increase in brain function, so the symptoms can wax and wane mysteriously.  Symptoms of Thiamine insufficiency include stunted growth, chronic fatigue, and Gastrointestinal Beriberi (diarrhea, abdominal pain), heart attack, Alzheimer's, stroke, and cancer.   Thiamine improves bone turnover.  Thiamine insufficiency can also affect the thyroid.  The thyroid is important in bone metabolism.  The thyroid also influences hormones, like estrogen and progesterone, and menopause.  Vitamin D, at optimal levels, can act as a hormone and can influence the thyroid, as well as being important to bone health, and regulating the immune system.  Vitamin A is important to bone health, too, and is necessary for intestinal health, as well.   I don't do dairy because I react to Casein, the protein in dairy that resembles gluten and causes a reaction the same as if I'd been exposed to gluten, including high tTg IgA.  I found adding mineral water containing calcium and other minerals helpful in increasing my calcium intake.   Malabsorption of Celiac affects all the vitamins and minerals.  I do hope you'll talk to your doctor and dietician about supplementing all eight B vitamins and the four fat soluble vitamins because they all work together interconnectedly.  
    • Florence Lillian
      Hi Jane: You may want to try the D3 I now take. I have reactions to fillers and many additives. Sports Research, it is based in the USA and I have had no bad reactions with this brand. The D3 does have coconut oil but it is non GMO, it is Gluten free, Soy free, Soybean free and Safflower oil free.  I have a cupboard full of supplements that did not agree with me -  I just keep trying and have finally settled on Sports Research. I take NAKA Women's Multi full spectrum, and have not felt sick after taking 2 capsules per day -  it is a Canadian company. I buy both from Amazon. I wish you well in your searching, I know how discouraging it all is. Florence.  
    • catnapt
      highly unlikely  NOTHING and I mean NOTHING else has ever caused me these kinds of symptoms I have no problem with dates, they are a large part of my diet In fact, I eat a very high fiber, very high vegetable and bean diet and have for many years now. It's considered a whole foods plant based or plant forward diet (I do now eat some lean ground turkey but not much) I was off dairy for years but recently had to add back plain yogurt to meet calcium needs that I am not allowed to get from supplements (I have not had any problem with the yogurt)   I eat almost no processed foods. I don't eat out. almost everything I eat, I cook myself I am going to keep a food diary but to be honest, I already know that it's wheat products and also barley that are the problem, which is why I gradually stopped eating and buying them. When I was eating them, like back in early 2024, when I was in the middle of moving and ate out (always had bread or toast or rolls or a sub or pizza) I felt terrible but at that time was so busy and exhausted that I never stopped to think it was the food. Once I was in my new place, I continued to have bread from time to time and had such horrible joint pain that I was preparing for 2 total knee replacements as well as one hip! The surgery could not go forward as I was (and still am) actively losing calcium from my bones. That problem has yet to be properly diagnosed and treated   anyway over time I realized that I felt better when I stopped eating bread. Back at least 3 yrs ago I noticed that regular pasta made me sick so I switched to brown rice pasta and even though it costs a lot more, I really like it.   so gradually I just stopped buying and eating foods with gluten. I stopped getting raisin bran when I was constipated because it made me bloated and it didn't help the constipation any more (used to be a sure bet that it would in the past)   I made cookies and brownies using beans and rolled oats and dates and tahini and I LOVE them and have zero issues eating those I eat 1 or more cans of beans per day easily can eat a pound of broccoli - no problem! Brussels sprouts the same thing.   so yeh it's bread and related foods that are clearly the problem  there is zero doubt in my mind    
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

NOTICE: This site places This site places cookies on your device (Cookie settings). on your device. Continued use is acceptance of our Terms of Use, and Privacy Policy.