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The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

TriticusToxicum

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DingoGirl Enthusiast
DingoGirl
Posted
"Umm sweetie, you do know where the grocery store eggs come from, right?"

"Yeah I know, but that's different."

CHICKEN BUTT COOTIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: oh now THAT was a good 'un!

:o

OMG! That can be the name of our stand-in band, when the BadAss Snow Poodles are on holiday. :rolleyes:

In a panic, my boyfriend exclaimed "There's No Fence!!!" We both looked at him and said "What?" And he said "There's No Fence and They're headed Right At Us!!!" Uncle and I started laughing as those cows stampeded towards us at a snails pace. And then the (EX) boyfriend hid behind me!

City boys! Bah! :huh:

Um, I feel it would help my mojo tremendously if I had some grandparents who were really lovely and kind and they had a FARM where I could spend my summers and holidays.

Yes! that's it! Can I borrow someone's?

:P

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tom Contributor
tom
Posted

Non-stop gigglefest reading thru all this!! :lol: (just too many posts in a row for this phone-surfer to properly quote, so I've cheated below)

" Chicken butt cooties!", :lol:

"thought they would taste funny since they were brown.", :lol:

"In a panic, my boyfriend exclaimed "There's No Fence!!!"", :lol:

"the (EX) boyfriend hid behind me! ", :lol:

"Sarah, tell your husband to quit licking the outside of the eggs!", :lol:

"OMG! OMG - Sarah!!! Why do hubby's say such stupid things!!! ", :lol:

"wah -- wah !!! ''They have poo on them''", :lol:

" More measuring......gad....", :lol:

"I thought only for a split second, and yelled..... Let the Yeti lead!!! ",

:lol:

"OMG! That can be the name of our stand-in band, when the BadAss Snow Poodles are on holiday." :lol:

("On holiday"??? :o:blink: SuUsie SO wants to be British!!)

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
Oh Patti---any winter weather at your house? Nothing here, nothing ever happened.....My mom and Dad have a few inches of snow though...in Scranton (north of Scranton)

We woke up to a dusting of snow. It's very cold, though and the roads are still slick.

You guys lucked out! :P

nikki-uk Enthusiast
nikki-uk
Posted
("On holiday"??? :o:blink: SuUsie SO wants to be British!!)

I feel I've rubbed off SO much on Susie that she IS in fact an honoury Brit ;) (Good call Susie !!)

:lol:can you imagine ...........

.......and now live with their latest smash hit .....''The Chicken Butt Cooties''

EMILY !!!!! YES!!!! LET THE YETI LEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (he'll love it!)

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted

I second that, let the Yeti lead...:):)

Darn210 Enthusiast
Darn210
Posted
Um, I feel it would help my mojo tremendously if I had some grandparents who were really lovely and kind and they had a FARM where I could spend my summers and holidays.

Yes! that's it! Can I borrow someone's?

You could borrow mine, but all of mine have passed on . . . my story about the exboyfriend was over 20 years ago . . . amazing, huh, since I'm only 28 . . . 32 . . .? :rolleyes:

:lol:can you imagine ...........

.......and now live .....''The Chicken Butt Cooties''

. . . with their number one hit Don't Lick Egg Shells.

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

All right, we'll let that yeti lead....

I've memorized his inseam measurement, for gawd's sake...sent that off to BIL...I'm estimating his chest to be.....what...fifty inches? sixty?...I don't wanna measure it!!! Give me a good estimate. His waist? About twice my husband's, so...64 inches? Three times Gus's....? Man...How about his feet....they have regulation booties that must be worn over rough terrain and frozen lakes. Would he be a size 12? 14?....

Another bit of regulation info: Will he be running primarily on two legs or four? If he spends more than three beats per minute on two legs, he will be disqualified as being too humanoid. Getting very complicated.... :o:huh:

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blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted

Is the Yeti excited?

So tonight is a rather cold and rainy dreary night? Anyone want to send some warmer weather towards my house?

tom Contributor
tom
Posted
. . . with their number one hit Don't Lick Egg Shells.

Yes!!

And I think my 2nd fave is their pseudo-cover of that Nancy Sinatra hit, also recently cover by Jessica Simpson. What the heck was it called?

Anyway, I DO remember the Chicken Butt Cooties renamed it "These Eggs Weren't Laid For Lickin' ".

I've memorized his inseam measurement, for gawd's sake...sent that off to BIL...I'm estimating his chest to be.....what...fifty inches? sixty?...I don't wanna measure it!!! Give me a good estimate. His waist? About twice my husband's, so...64 inches? Three times Gus's....? Man...How about his feet....they have regulation booties that must be worn over rough terrain and frozen lakes. Would he be a size 12? 14?....

I thought our Yeti was much bigger and better proportioned than THAT! 1st guess is maybe 80" waist and 110" chest.

But Yeti, close relative to BIGFOOT w/ a dainty size12 boot???!!! :blink:

Sheesh girrrrrrrrl I'M a 13!!!!!

Shaquille O'Neal is a 22. So I'll guess 28-30 for the Yeti. :P

Another bit of regulation info: Will he be running primarily on two legs or four? If he spends more than three beats per minute on two legs, he will be disqualified as being too humanoid. Getting very complicated.... :o:huh:

Uh-oh!

Another complication . .. . . ..hmmmm .. . .not sure how to say this. Perhaps something was lost in translation, but according to Angus' blog, the Yeti's been under the impression he's to RIDE in the sled!!!!!

I KNOWWWW!!!! I have no idea how this could happen either!

There was one somewhat confusing bit about Angus tiring of hearing a denigrating tone accompany the phrase "four-legged beast". Can't say for sure, but my take is that Yeti considers himself above anything not bipedal. Go figure.

But . .. . .like I say .. ..I may be reading it ALL wrong. :)

Darn210 Enthusiast
Darn210
Posted
Yes!!

And I think my 2nd fave is their pseudo-cover of that Nancy Sinatra hit, also recently cover by Jessica Simpson. What the heck was it called?

Anyway, I DO remember the Chicken Butt Cooties renamed it "These Eggs Weren't Laid For Lickin' ".

:lol::lol:

Oh yes!! Quite catchy, that one. Also, I believe the Dylan influenced song "Crowin' in the Wind" will do quite well. I'm sure their debut album (Clever as a Gizzard) is destined to go platinum!

But Yeti, close relative to BIGFOOT w/ a dainty size12 boot???!!! :blink:

:lol:

Uh-oh!

Another complication . .. . . ..hmmmm .. . .not sure how to say this. Perhaps something was lost in translation, but according to Angus' blog, the Yeti's been under the impression he's to RIDE in the sled!!!!!

I KNOWWWW!!!! I have no idea how this could happen either!

There was one somewhat confusing bit about Angus tiring of hearing a denigrating tone accompany the phrase "four-legged beast". Can't say for sure, but my take is that Yeti considers himself above anything not bipedal. Go figure.

Oooooh, I sense trouble a-brewin'. Yep, I can see that four-legged running requirement throwing quite a wrench into the whole thing . . .

Angus' blog . . . :lol::lol:

Ridgewalker Contributor
Ridgewalker
Posted
OMG! OMG - Sarah!!! Why do hubby's say such stupid things!!!

LOL- Because they're retarded.

''They have poo on them''

TSK!!! :rolleyes:

:lol: :lol: :lol:

On eggs: Have any of you eaten duck eggs? Incredible. I have never seen such yellow yolks...

Nope, never had the opportunity... are they very different from chicken eggs?

Um, I feel it would help my mojo tremendously if I had some grandparents who were really lovely and kind and they had a FARM where I could spend my summers and holidays.

Yes! that's it! Can I borrow someone's?

:P

Sadly, mine have also passed away... Maybe we need to build a Silly Commune that is half resort, half mad house! We'll all meet up every so often and scare the neighbors!!!

:lol: :lol: :lol: at the Chicken Butt Cooties and their Billboard hits!

Darn210 Enthusiast
Darn210
Posted
OMG! OMG - Sarah!!! Why do hubby's say such stupid things!!!

LOL- Because they're retarded.

Because they're men? :huh:

Darn210 Enthusiast
Darn210
Posted
You could borrow mine, but all of mine have passed on . . .

Here's a grandpa memory . . .

He use to draw on the dogs and goats with sharpie markers . . . giving them glasses, mustaches, saddles, black eyes, etc . . . The dogs loved it because it always got them extra attention when anyone visited.

DingoGirl Enthusiast
DingoGirl
Posted
Sadly, mine have also passed away... Maybe we need to build a Silly Commune that is half resort, half mad house! We'll all meet up every so often and scare the neighbors!!!

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!! We were working on that, sort of, in Rachelville, but got kicked out of town. the Mad House Resort sounds like the perfect solution. :lol:

the Chicken Butt Cooties are also doing a cover of (of course) Ain't Nobody Here Butt (ha) Us Chickens............ AND the Kenny Rogers hit - was it Don't Take your Love to Town? Theirs will be, of course, Don't Make Your Eggs too Brown.

See, the BadAss Snow Poodles are really busy during I Did Her Rod season........

:o

MYGod, I had the worst, most hellish day imaginable.....................started at 10-ish, when I tried on what I felt was SURE to be the proper funeral outfit. Um, it SO was not. :huh: Panic. See, I've gained nearly 25 pounds in the last two years, and bought tons of new jeans and shirts and sweaters and stuff, but NOTHING of a formal/dressy nature. So.....NOTHING fit. Well, the skirt fit, but it was just.........wrong...and the sweater I had planned to wear.......TOTALLY wrong.

So I dash over to Gail's (dingos in tow), who has a house full of what I thought would be suitable clothing. Borrowed a couple of coats/jackets etc. Stopped at three stores (with dingos in car). Mad crowds. Was looking for suitable skirt and/or pants........and did I say AFFORDABLE???? Went to Banana Republic - many GORGEOUS things but not on the sale rack - that fit. :angry: DAshed dingos back home. Then hit about.........eight more stores, all over town.

I am positively ragged.......but have black pants AND a skirt that fit and are lovely. And some suitable top parts. Half of these things will go back after I make a game-day decision about what to wear.

SHOPPING!!! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR !!!!!!!! :angry: HEINOUS!!!!!!!!!!

There is SO MUCH CRAP clothing when you have to go to Marshall's, TJMaxx, etc. argh. Also did go to some posh stores but no good sales.

Oh, also hadn't eaten since 9 a.m.. Just ate and it's 8:00. :blink:

Dingy is ragged, must figure out outfit and go to bed. Dear gawd, I think Jenn is emailing me the eulogy later and I am to edit that.

That should be interesting. :lol: :lol:

DingoGirl Enthusiast
DingoGirl
Posted
Here's a grandpa memory . . .

He use to draw on the dogs and goats with sharpie markers . . . giving them glasses, mustaches, saddles, black eyes, etc . . . The dogs loved it because it always got them extra attention when anyone visited.

:lol: :lol: :lol:

that's excellent. This is clearly FROM WHENCE you get your wackiness (note proper prepositional placement, even whilst hypoglycemic and mad from dashing about all day).

I forgot to mention, the funeral is at the most uncivilized hour of 10 a.m. Then, graveside burial (will take forEVER), then back to the church for a lunch I cannot eat........good gawd.

:huh:

guess I"ll pack food?

tom Contributor
tom
Posted
Oh yes!! Quite catchy, that one. Also, I believe the Dylan influenced song "Crowin' in the Wind" will do quite well. I'm sure their debut album (Clever as a Gizzard) is destined to go platinum!

:lol:

Maybe we need to build a Silly Commune that is half resort, half mad house! We'll all meet up every so often and scare the neighbors!!!

:lol: (& see below)

Here's a grandpa memory . . .

He use to draw on the dogs and goats with sharpie markers . . . giving them glasses, mustaches, saddles, black eyes, etc . . . The dogs loved it because it always got them extra attention when anyone visited.

LMAO! :lol: Sooooooo much more palatable than dressed-up pets!

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!! We were working on that, sort of, in Rachelville, but got kicked out of town. the Mad House Resort sounds like the perfect solution. :lol:

That Rachelville Commune creation was hilarious! Well before my time, but I got tipped off to its whereabouts. ;)

Attack geese!! :lol:

the Chicken Butt Cooties are also doing a cover of (of course) Ain't Nobody Here Butt (ha) Us Chickens............ AND the Kenny Rogers hit - was it Don't Take your Love to Town? Theirs will be, of course, Don't Make Your Eggs too Brown.

:lol:

know what?

chickenbutt!

Luuuuuuuv the video for "Bawk Like an Egyptian"

Kinda sappy for me, but that ode to fowl's flatulence, "Wind Beneath My Wings" keeps coming to mind.

Oh!! An old chestnut from the 70s! Remember that scare about breasts from aged chickens being carcinogenic?

The ribbon-for-this ribbon-for-that biz hadn't yet taken off, but I think "Tie a Yellow Ribbon 'Round the Old Poultry" had a part in popularizing the practice.

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted

Here it is the last day of my reign. How is everyone today :)

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted
Luuuuuuuv the video for "Bawk Like an Egyptian"

I think actually it's Squauk Like an Egyptian... :lol:

Morning, all...

Twenty centimetres has fallen, another twenty to go....

The diplomats are flummoxed by this barrage of snow. C`mon, guys, we`re in the northern hemisphere! :rolleyes:

Ah! Hilarious...I have inadvertently switched my keyboard to French characters, and I dunno how to undo it. My apostrophes are coming out as accent graves, and I cannot find my question mark....Question mark is this:

~alex~ Explorer
~alex~
Posted
Ah! Hilarious...I have inadvertently switched my keyboard to French characters, and I dunno how to undo it. My apostrophes are coming out as accent graves, and I cannot find my question mark....Question mark is this:
Darn210 Enthusiast
Darn210
Posted
I'm jumping in a little late on this thread, but....

Everything turned out really good except the gravy. I've NEVER been able to make gravy at all, so the fact that it actually turned out edible made me happy, but it was definitely weird.

I thickened with cornstarch, but it just didn't want to thicken, so I added more... and more... and more... It finally thickened, and tasted fine at dinner. But the next day when I got out the leftovers, it was like gravy jello. I thought, well it'll melt when I heat it up, BUT IT DIDN'T! :huh: It became hot gravy jello. Gross. So no leftover gravy...

HeeHeeHee - Found this on another thread. I brought it over so we could all snicker at Sarah's Hot Gravy Jello. :lol::lol: They might think I'm rude and report me on the other thread but there is no such thing as being rude on this one . . . mmmm, gravy jello (insert Homer Simpson drooling emoticon here) . . . OK, I'll make both the jello and the gravy when we get to the commune!

know what?

chickenbutt!

This deserves a tiny heehee

Thank Gawd Scott gave us the ability to subsize our text when needed.

nikki-uk Enthusiast
nikki-uk
Posted
Hilarious...I have inadvertently switched my keyboard to French characters, and I dunno how to undo it.

You will be snowed in....only able to write in French???? :o

Quelle horreur!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I do that too sometimes . . . very funny! Do you have a little picture of a keyboard on the bottom tool bar? For mine, you click on that and you can change the keyboard language.

Non

Must be a French/Canadian thang :blink:

HeeHeeHee - Found this on another thread. I brought it over so we could all snicker at Sarah's Hot Gravy Jello. :lol::lol: They might think I'm rude and report me on the other thread but there is no such thing as being rude on this one . . . mmmm, gravy jello (insert Homer Simpson drooling emoticon here) . . . OK, I'll make both the jello and the gravy when we get to the commune!

*SNICKER* and *SNORT* :lol:

Sarah is SOOO busted on the solid gravy :lol::lol:

Ridgewalker Contributor
Ridgewalker
Posted
HeeHeeHee - Found this on another thread. I brought it over so we could all snicker at Sarah's Hot Gravy Jello. :lol::lol: They might think I'm rude and report me on the other thread but there is no such thing as being rude on this one . . . mmmm, gravy jello (insert Homer Simpson drooling emoticon here) . . . OK, I'll make both the jello and the gravy when we get to the commune!

*SNICKER* and *SNORT* :lol:

Sarah is SOOO busted on the solid gravy :lol::lol:

GAH!!! :o Ya got me! :lol: :lol: :lol:

Janet, I will gladly hand over those duties to you! :D

blueeyedmanda Community Regular
blueeyedmanda
Posted

So I got a lot of my professional pictures back from the wedding....I am so happy with them. :)

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted
So I got a lot of my professional pictures back from the wedding....I am so happy with them. :)

That's great :D

Closet gets done today!!!!!!!

elye Community Regular
elye
Posted

That's a beautiful pic in your avatar, Amanda! :)

Gotta go shovel....AGAIN.... :angry: ...Need that yeti!

Uh....guys.....

Almost 400.

I'll likely be out shovelling...AGAIN....when the turnover and consequential new coronation takes place.

All hail Whoever!!

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