The Funny Pages - Tickle Me Elbow - The Original

[elye]

While I was talking, my tongue peaked too far out of my mouth and contacted the mouthpiece. I was so disgusted I got chills and I began madly spitting and wiping my tongue with a Kleenex! I didn't think there was anything grosser than bum contact with a public toilet but I think for me this may have been worse!

Gaaaaahhhhh.....(Grossed-out face emoticon). And the frightening part is that hovering will do nothing to protect you from this particular stomach-churning act...

[psawyer]

Hey Peter!!! Do you like cider??

Janet, I find most cider to be too sweet for my palate. I'd much rather have a dry white wine.

[elye]

Janet, I find most cider to be too sweet for my palate. I'd much rather have a dry white wine.

Peter! Yes, too sweet for your palate, but more importantly, far too sweet for your uselsess pancreas. Pardon me, I'm sure you have a lovely pancreas, but like mine, it ain't functioning.

[psawyer]

Peter! Yes, too sweet for your palate, but more importantly, far too sweet for your uselsess pancreas. Pardon me, I'm sure you have a lovely pancreas, but like mine, it ain't functioning.

True, indeed. But as I was 31 when diagnosed as a type one diabetic, I had plenty of opportunity to try various ciders and decide that I didn't like most of them. There was one (Woodpecker?) that was passable.

[nikki-uk]

I must report on something upsettingly disgusting that happened to me to day. I was out picking up a few things and needed to make a phone call. I didn't have my cell phone so I used a pay phone. While I was talking, my tongue peaked too far out of my mouth and contacted the mouthpiece. I was so disgusted I got chills and I began madly spitting and wiping my tongue with a Kleenex! I didn't think there was anything grosser than bum contact with a public toilet but I think for me this may have been worse!

NEEEARGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <spit,spit,spit-rinse with industrial strength mouthwash again + again>

GAHHHHHHHHHHHH..........the horror!!!!!!!!!!!

Errrm, please do NOT feed cider to the diabetics - thankyou

[tom]

Oh Em I still crack up thinking of The Ripper requesting that we be told of fluidacious farce.

Tom, he told me to mention to you that if cider has remaining similarities to apple juice, it could be sulphites that made you so sick.

Ah yes, please thank The Ripper for me.

Good point.

Maybe you could ask him what would be a good test for me to see if sulfites are an issue.

Omg!!! Maybe yesterday sucked because the prior night's wine was extra-sulfitey!!?

Twas just one glass and haven't had wine problems that I know of in the past. Hmmmmm

BTW, he has a little pewter frame on his headboard with the original pic still in it (y'know, the apple fallin' close to the tree thing). It's an old-looking sepia shot of a little girl's face, with Shirley temple curls and a tiny 1920's smile. I saw it there and asked him about it. He said, "I want to keep this picture. I'm sure she was one of the kids on the Titanic."

Good a reason as any.....

:lol:

I've always liked the word sepia, but I think I mispronounced it for decades!!!

It's a long E, right?

Yay Amanda!! Hope you get to ski!!!

<------- ski goggles

And this may be eerily similar to Alex's confetti, but I assure you it's gently falling snow.

` 0 O o . 0`

.0 o 0` o` o . 0

o. o O . `o o`

0. ` o .o`0 O . o `

0 ` o . 0 . `0 O . o

Ewwwwwww on the public phone lick Alex!!!!!

[Darn210]

Emily - Love the Ripper/Yipper Av

Alex - EWWWWWWW and while I'm trying to visualize you accidently licking a phone.

[elye]

NEEEARGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <spit,spit,spit-rinse with industrial strength mouthwash again + again>

GAHHHHHHHHHHHH..........the horror!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes...this continues to sicken me somewhat when I think of it. Alex, how can one accidentally lick a phone receiver? I can see dropping it, or getting spit on it. Licking just seems so....intentional....

Maybe you could ask him what would be a good test for me to see if sulfites are an issue.

Omg!!! Maybe yesterday sucked because the prior night's wine was extra-sulfitey!!?

Twas just one glass and haven't had wine problems that I know of in the past. Hmmmmm

I've gotten somewhat accustomed to Jack's sudden arbitrary and bang-on knowledge. He'll suddenly tell me the mixture needed of parts water and parts turpentine for a stain wash, or how many stages of Man existed before the Cro-magnons, or the proper way to react if ever suddenly facing a lion.

However, I still was surprised and amused when he quickly assessed your sick episode, Tom. Didn't know he knew anything about this. I asked him your question about how you can test to see if you are sensitive to sulphites. He said, "Well, he needs to eat some food that's loaded with them and lacking in the other stuff he can't handle". Yeah, well, easier said than done. But he did say, "Lots of people have trouble with them".

I know that wine definitely contains sulphites, some much more than others. Dried fruit, as well. Hang on.........

Okay....the news isn't good. They're in freaking everything......

Open Original Shared Link

I've always liked the word sepia, but I think I mispronounced it for decades!!!

It's a long E, right?

Righto! That must have been your IVS acting up.......

Keep meaning to tell you, Tom....checked out Lara and Laura's site. Great stuff!

[DingoGirl]

I can just see Susie, out in the real world, "silly" thoughts slowly taking over....chortling and snorting whilst the salesclerk looks on and wonders.....

yes, pure madness, and happens a lot

Happy Saturday Morning, All!

Gaahhh...All this waxing about liquers and cider.... Haven't been able to ever indulge, with the sugar content being what it is. Sigh............I'm such a pedestrian....drinker...dry white wine. Well, champagne. Bloody Marys. But I want The Phaerie....

my dear, I assure you, there is nothign pedestrian about you.

the girl in picture frame from the Titanic Jack is PHUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!! Love his bits of information that come outta nowhere......

I must report on something upsettingly disgusting that happened to me to day. I was out picking up a few things and needed to make a phone call. I didn't have my cell phone so I used a pay phone. While I was talking, my tongue peaked too far out of my mouth and contacted the mouthpiece. I was so disgusted I got chills and I began madly spitting and wiping my tongue with a Kleenex! I didn't think there was anything grosser than bum contact with a public toilet but I think for me this may have been worse!

\

ALEX!!!!!!!!!!! this is far more upsetting than a toilet-seat encounter.......um.......um............drink a gallon of turpentine. STAT!!!!!!!

Peter! Yes, too sweet for your palate, but more importantly, far too sweet for your uselsess pancreas. Pardon me, I'm sure you have a lovely pancreas, but like mine, it ain't functioning.

oh, now, now, I think it's against phorum rules to insult other members' organs......

I've gotten somewhat accustomed to Jack's sudden arbitrary and bang-on knowledge. He'll suddenly tell me the mixture needed of parts water and parts turpentine for a stain wash, or how many stages of Man existed before the Cro-magnons, or the proper way to react if ever suddenly facing a lion.

v. entertaining little Ripper guy

IVS

Amanda - skiing - yay! Wonder if I"ll ever go again......

Well Sillies I have done nearly four hours of yard work today and - - back is a mess. but, I have these Lidocaine patches to stick on there, quite excited about seeing how that will work. Our friend Squats made a BET with me that I wouldn't mow the lawn today...... "you'll get distracted by something shiny on the way out the door......." ha ha ha!!!!!!! Mowed the lawns, and three hours of weeding/pruning. HA!!!!!!!!!! ;P Starting to look rather civilized out there again.

off to the couch now.

[nikki-uk]

Well Sillies I have done nearly four hours of yard work today and - - back is a mess. but, I have these Lidocaine patches to stick on there, quite excited about seeing how that will work. Our friend Squats made a BET with me that I wouldn't mow the lawn today...... "you'll get distracted by something shiny on the way out the door......." ha ha ha!!!!!!! Mowed the lawns, and three hours of weeding/pruning. HA!!!!!!!!!! ;P Starting to look rather civilized out there again.

off to the couch now.

Good work Susie!!!! Patches sound marvellous!!

Too cold to venture into the garden yet here I'm afraid gawd does it need tidying

[psawyer]

Well Sillies I have done nearly four hours of yard work today and - - back is a mess. but, I have these Lidocaine patches to stick on there, quite excited about seeing how that will work. Our friend Squats made a BET with me that I wouldn't mow the lawn today...... "you'll get distracted by something shiny on the way out the door......." ha ha ha!!!!!!! Mowed the lawns, and three hours of weeding/pruning. HA!!!!!!!!!! ;P Starting to look rather civilized out there again.

No worries of something like that happening here any time soon. The lawn is buried under a foot (or so) of snow. If that isn't enough, we are expecting another 4 inches on Tuesday. Tis heinous, n'est-ce pas?

[DingoGirl]

Tis heinous, n'est-ce pas?

:lol: :lol:

that's my new favorite sentence................

Yes, we can see the ground here.......and what a sad sight it is. Stinker, the poor old girl, was eating all the sod, as many of you know. It's the saddest looking grass. Must re-sod this spring...........

Kissey (Jenn's nickname for David) will be here in minutes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I"m so pathetic.

I made crockpot chili verde, can't say that I'm completely thrilled wif it, but it'll do......

carry on sillies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[~alex~]

Yes...this continues to sicken me somewhat when I think of it. Alex, how can one accidentally lick a phone receiver? I can see dropping it, or getting spit on it. Licking just seems so....intentional....

I know, it does seem unbelievable and I myself don't quite understand how it happened. I think I was saying "these" or something at the time and my tongue just thrust quite far out of my mouth.

I had a bit of stutter as a child so I have a history of an uncooperative tongue . Or perhaps I had an unconscious desire to lick the phone -- I'm sure Freud would have an interesting interpretation of that!

Whatever the case, I hope it was just a freak combination of factors that led to the nasty incident and that those series of events will never again occur and result in a repeat performance. For a second I wanted to squirt my hand- sanitizer on my tongue but I thought that might just leave me with a whole nother set of problems.

[elye]

No worries of something like that happening here any time soon. The lawn is buried under a foot (or so) of snow. If that isn't enough, we are expecting another 4 inches on Tuesday. Tis heinous, n'est-ce pas?

Oui, Pierre, c'est ca. Mais........we in the Valley are getting five inches. Gaaaad...

p.s. Peter, please accept my apologies for dissing one of your organs. I'm sure you have a lovely pancreas. And your lungs, certainly, must be commendable....and your liver! Quite comely, I would wager.

[psawyer]

Oui, Pierre, c'est ca.

It has been a long time since anyone called me Pierre, although that is a name I went by at one time.

Today, most people know me as Peter, but some know me as Pete. I have also been known, when I was much younger, as Doug (my middle name is Douglas). Jacquie has always called me Peter, although she is well aware of my being known as Pete at the last place I was employed full-time. My mother calls me Pete sometimes.

In my volunteer work with Scouts Canada, I was usually always known as "Scouter Pete" since "Scouter Peter" just has a rough sound to it.

So, I am your silly friend, whether you think of me as Pete, Doug, Pierre or Peter. C'est moi.

I won't talk about your organs if you don't talk about mine. LOL

[jerseyangel]

I didn't think there was anything grosser than bum contact with a public toilet but I think for me this may have been worse!

Yep--this beats bum contact--hands down!

I'd much rather have a dry white wine.

Ah--me too

Kissey (Jenn's nickname for David) will be here in minutes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I"m so pathetic.

Not at all Have fun and don't do anything I wouldn't do

[tom]

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You have posted more than the allowed number of quoted blocks of text

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Mah!!!

GAHHHHHHHHHHHHDD!!!!!!!!!

I started replying ~3pm but have been so gleefully occupied since, I haven't posted and it's 9hrs later now!!!

Whatever wasn't right for me yesterday was DEFinitely just a 1day thing.

I've gotten somewhat accustomed to Jack's sudden arbitrary and bang-on knowledge. He'll suddenly tell me the mixture needed of parts water and parts turpentine for a stain wash, or how many stages of Man existed before the Cro-magnons, or the proper way to react if ever suddenly facing a lion.

However, I still was surprised and amused when he quickly assessed your sick episode, Tom. Didn't know he knew anything about this. I asked him your question about how you can test to see if you are sensitive to sulphites. He said, "Well, he needs to eat some food that's loaded with them and lacking in the other stuff he can't handle". Yeah, well, easier said than done. But he did say, "Lots of people have trouble with them".

I know that wine definitely contains sulphites, some much more than others. Dried fruit, as well. Hang on.........

Okay....the news isn't good. They're in freaking everything......

That they are.

But in that list of 50 or whatever foods .. . . .I eat TWO! (And that's including the brown rice tortillas, tho we know they mean corn or <shudder> wheat)

Also drink 2 more items on that list, but Redbridge never gave me a bad day-after. (In fact, Redbridge was CRUcial in my discovering the FINAL intolerance for me)

Since susie has worked for a winery I have to ask whether she knows if sulfites are more plentiful in reds vs whites?

<oh google-shmoogle we got a PRO here!!!>

Keep meaning to tell you, Tom....checked out Lara and Laura's site. Great stuff!

Ohhhhhhh YEA-YAH!!

Originally was gonna write I might see the full band tonight, but now I can say I SAW them tonight and it was fantastic. Laura IS practically the new Stevie Ray Vaughn!!!

Was having a very fun, great conv w/ this delectable blonde for 5-10min before I even noticed the rock and wedding band. D'oh! I need to remember to look for such things.

But her group included her Dad (!) who's a drummer in a band that could use some sAx. Hmmmm

(How weird is it she was in from Madera!! [by Fresno FYI])

my dear, I assure you, there is nothing pedestrian about you.

Even when Emily's out on a simple stroll, I can imagine a pronounced propensity towards the Silly Walk.

ok maybe not

[tom]

Part Deux

Well Sillies I have done nearly four hours of yard work today and - - back is a mess. but, I have these Lidocaine patches to stick on there, quite excited about seeing how that will work.

Oooooooooooo if they work I WANT some!!

Our friend Squats made a BET with me that I wouldn't mow the lawn today...... "you'll get distracted by something shiny on the way out the door......."

Didja win a bright shiny dime???!!

. .. .. . n'est-ce pas?

I KNEW my "n'est pas" wasn't quite right!!!

<not quite right!!>

Kissey (Jenn's nickname for David) will be here in minutes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I"m so pathetic.

.. .. . Or perhaps I had an unconscious desire to lick the phone -- I'm sure Freud would have an interesting interpretation of that!

<austrian psychologist voice> sometimes a phone is just a phone .... .

a whole nother set of problems.

Ahhhhh I do enjoy me a well-placed "whole nother"!!

I have also been known, when I was much younger, as Doug. .. .

Take off hoser!!

P.S. I like trees big enough to buckle the sidewalk

P.P.S. Ack!! I didn't even get into my purchase today of the Absinthe Fran

[nikki-uk]

Even when Emily's out on a simple stroll, I can imagine a pronounced propensity towards the Silly Walk.

HOLD ON!!!!!!!!

Did someone say

?????????

[Darn210]

Since susie has worked for a winery I have to ask whether she knows if sulfites are more plentiful in reds vs whites?

<oh google-shmoogle we got a PRO here!!!>

From Open Original Shared Link

I can drink only white wines. Do red wines have more sulfites?

Actually, red wines may have less sulfites. In 1993 the European Union passed regulations permitting higher levels of total sulphur dioxide in dry white wine than in dry red wine and an even higher level in sweet white wines and rose wines. The higher level in the sweet wines are necessary to prevent the further fermentation of the higher levels of residual sugar. If you have a problem with red wines as compared to white wines, it may be related to the

[elye]

Happy Sunday morning, guys!

In my volunteer work with Scouts Canada, I was usually always known as "Scouter Pete" since "Scouter Peter" just has a rough sound to it.

Peter! You were involved in this great organization? Jack is very involved in Cubs. The Rally is coming up...Oracle Peter, what secrets can you give us for producing the winning car? More weight, of course....more streamlined? A hidden fan, or engine?

I won't talk about your organs if you don't talk about mine. LOL

You're on, Dougie!

I KNEW my "n'est pas" wasn't quite right!!!

Yep...I made this faux pas, as well, some time back.....

N'est pas = is not

N'est-ce pas? = is it not so?

....or somefin'.....

<not quite right!!>

Wait.....This is in Supertramp somewhere....Roger Hodgson shouts it out somewhere....where? Drivin' me crazyyy....

<austrian psychologist voice> sometimes a phone is just a phone .... .

[/paste]

Yes.....pens are pens, cigars, cigars, microphones, microphones....We all know what they always really seemed to mean to Sigmund Freud, Esquire.....

Wow....I'd 'a loved his take on the penis slings!

[Darn210]

Wait.....This is in Supertramp somewhere....Roger Hodgson shouts it out somewhere....where? Drivin' me crazyyy....

[

Perhaps you are speaking of the Sillyville theme song . . .Asylum?

He's mad, mad, mad...

Not quite right...

So I posted earlier and it did not show up . . . hmmm, so what did I do? type it all in and then closed the window? . . . Naaaahhhhh, must be Scott's fault, surely not mine!!!

Nikki - Silly Walk - - you can NOT go wrong with a Monty Python clip.

Scouter Peter - yes, I think I would go with just Pete. We have a big Scouting affair today . . . Must start drinking soon so that I will survive . . . 100 Scouts plus siblings at a carnival . . . whose heinous idea was that???

[happygirl]

I won't talk about your organs if you don't talk about mine. LOL

This struck me as absolutely hilarious.

[jerseyangel]

Happy Sunday, Sillies

Laura--always nice to see you pop by

Well, Mark's dream came true--I have laryngitis! Can hardly croak out a word. I coughed so hard yesterday, I peed a little I never got colds all the years I had stomach problems from the undiagnosed Celiac--now all of a sudden, I get 2 colds in one winter

Oye...I guess this means I'm better

The immune system is a mysterious mechinism I want a new one

Emily and Peter--does this count as organ talk?

[Darn210]

Any golfers in this group? . . .

GOLF AND WHAT IT ALL MEANS

Golf can best be defined as an endless series of

tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle,

followed by a good bottle of beer.

Golf! You hit down to make the ball go up. You swing

left and the ball goes right. The lowest score wins.

And on top of that, the winner buys the drinks.

Golf is harder than baseball. In golf, you have to

play your foul balls.

If you find you do not mind playing golf in the rain,

the snow, even during a hurricane, here's a valuable

tip: your life is in trouble.

Golfers who try to make everything perfect before

taking the shot rarely make a perfect shot.

The term "mulligan" is really a contraction of the

phrase "maul it again."

A "gimme" can best be defined as an agreement

between two golfers ...neither of whom can putt

very well.

An interesting thing about golf is that no matter how

badly you play; it is always possible to get worse.

Golf's a hard game to figure. One day you'll go out

and slice it and shank it, hit into all the traps and miss

every green. The next day you go out and for no

reason at all you really stink.

If your best shots are the practice swing and the

"gimme putt", you might wish to reconsider this game.

Golf is the only sport where the most feared opponent

is you.

Golf is like marriage: If you take yourself too

seriously it won't work, and both are expensive.

The best wood in most amateurs' bags is the pencil.