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Smoking

msmini14

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Jestgar Rising Star
Jestgar
Posted
hope your all doing well

I haven't slipped up yet but really wanted to light up today.

No stress, nothing special happened -- just missing it still.

I guess this is what addiction is.

good luck all!

So instead you posted. good call!

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Judyin Philly Enthusiast
Judyin Philly
Posted
hope your all doing well

I haven't slipped up yet but really wanted to light up today.

No stress, nothing special happened -- just missing it still.

I guess this is what addiction is.

good luck all!

yes your so right on that one.

we are getting the house of 30 years ready to put on the market, have our second yard sale.

and trying to place our precious kitty we can't move to CA due to our Son who lives there, horrific allergic reactions to him.

Yep, stressfull times here in Media PA

Still hanging in there but not happy about it.

I know it will pass in time but 6+ months.......man. :blink:

Jen and Susan how are you 2 doing?

Lisa Mentor
Lisa
Posted

Judy ONE DAY AT A TIME ;)

xxoo

Judyin Philly Enthusiast
Judyin Philly
Posted

Thanks you guys

Seems these times of stress are just kinda hard.

I really appreciate the 'long time' quiters helping us out!

Maybe the rest of us 'newbies' are still kinda fragile :blink::(

I just keep thinking ........well i didn't smoke today

I have the 3 packs in a mailing envelope with so much package 4" tape all around it.....will take till Christmas to get into it

With the cost of smokes these days.....don't even know what they cost.............but I sure won't pay for them.

thanks again ex smokers for the support.

Judy

kenlove Rising Star
kenlove
Posted
thanks again ex smokers for the support.

Judy

I'll second that! and thank the new quitters too!

mushroom Proficient
mushroom
Posted

Way to go all you new non-smokers. I refuse to call you quitters because you are the exact opposite of that :D

Had a mini-moment myself the other day, just walking along in pure fresh air minding my own business and I suddenly got a whiff of smoke from a freshly-lit cigarette, and for just a microsecond said to myself, "Mmm, dat smells good". After all these years!! But then I realized we get lots of pleasant smell reminders from the past and that's all they are.

Judyin Philly Enthusiast
Judyin Philly
Posted
I'll second that! and thank the new quitters too!

yes, thanks to any and ALL who are surporting us.

coming on computer as i really want a break from painting

with the computer could give me a tiny little 'kick'

maybe the rubber band will work.............. ;)

think i just need a vacation from all this work............. :lol:

But then I realized we get lots of pleasant smell reminders from the past and that's all they are.

yes and finally the smoke doesn't smell as good as it used to ;)

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msmini14 Enthusiast
msmini14
Posted
  • Author

Hi All, how is everyone doing? I honestly fell off the wagon for awhile and I was very ashamed about my actions. I guess it could have been worse, but I am over it.

So I am a non smoker again. It is just so hard, all the anxiety and depression, I sometimes can not handle it.

I am sorry I have not been posting, but like I said I was ashamed and I didnt want to say anything because this has become a great topic for people who want to quit or have quit.

I hope everyone is doing good and still smoke free.

Judyin Philly Enthusiast
Judyin Philly
Posted
Hi All, how is everyone doing? I honestly fell off the wagon for awhile and I was very ashamed about my actions. I guess it could have been worse, but I am over it.

So I am a non smoker again. It is just so hard, all the anxiety and depression, I sometimes can not handle it.

I am sorry I have not been posting, but like I said I was ashamed and I didn't want to say anything because this has become a great topic for people who want to quit or have quit.

I hope everyone is doing good and still smoke free.

I sure don't want people to feel like this.

Being Ashamed is such a ucky way to feel and we could have been there to help you feel better about yourself while you were already beating your self up.

This thread needs to be a SAFE place to come where people support each other no matter where they are on this journey to stop quitting.

This is the first time I've experienced such depression when stopping.

the shakes, quivering nausea and bouts of anger................

BET YOU ALL ARE GLAD YOU AIN'T LIVING WITH ME. :lol:

COURSE WITH this move and being exhausted with the painting scraping sanding of the whole house it's just about killed me.

I guess the only thing that I hold on to now is

1. pulmonary Fibrosis dx

2. moving to CA where i can't smoke anywhere anyway.

3. Seeing a Phychiatist who is helping me understand why the smoking help me with pain management. I'm trying cymbalta now at a really low dose that i can increase. At first the fibro pain was much worse but now seems to be helping. Only saw he twice but he sure did help me

OK--I've just spilled my guts. :o

Jen, remember----I'm 67 and this is the 6Th time I've quit smoking so guess I was like you when I was younger.

Just please don't beat yourself up

If you've stopped now....you need us more than ever.

Please keep posting.

Wonder how Susan doing and Ravenwood too

Ken how are you doing and the rest i can't remember.

back to painting.

Judy

mushroom Proficient
mushroom
Posted

As Judy said, we are here to support you through the bad times as well as cheer lead in the good. Don't stop posting just because you have not been perfect. Come here and we will prop you up and get you back on track. Good for you for doing it on your own, but really, we are here to help. :wub:

Judyin Philly Enthusiast
Judyin Philly
Posted
As Judy said, we are here to support you through the bad times as well as cheer lead in the good. Don't stop posting just because you have not been perfect. Come here and we will prop you up and get you back on track. Good for you for doing it on your own, but really, we are here to help. :wub:

DITTO mushroom.

To me, these are the times we need each other most..........on the daily struggle to keep from lighting up that ONE........

REMEMBER JEN ----you were the one who started this thread of support and look at the people who joined and ARE HERE because of you.

HA i see you.

how you doing today

I pray Temecula is worth all this.

msmini14 Enthusiast
msmini14
Posted
  • Author

Thanks Judy and Mushroom, I really appreciate your response.

I guess it is normal for us humans to be hard on ourselves, which I am lol. I put on my step 3 patch from when I quit in March just to help with the cravings.

At least I know what to expect now and I am going to try to control my feelings this time. I might go to the dr to get a perscription for depression but I am not sure if I want to go that far.

One huge problem I have when I quit is I can not go to the bathroom for the life of me and when that happens I get so frustrated. Do you guys have any suggestions? Is there something I can buy that is gluten-free that will help me go to the bathroom?

msmini14 Enthusiast
msmini14
Posted
  • Author
DITTO mushroom.

To me, these are the times we need each other most..........on the daily struggle to keep from lighting up that ONE........

REMEMBER JEN ----you were the one who started this thread of support and look at the people who joined and ARE HERE because of you.

HA i see you.

how you doing today

I pray Temecula is worth all this.

Hi Judy!

lol I am at work trying to move along slowly so I dont run out of work. I am good =) I am so thrilled that everyone has come to this thread for support, it has turned into a great place for support. I will continue to be here everyday, I just felt so bad.

I am so lucky that you all understand and I should have come here for support. I just didnt want to let anyone down or cause someone to smoke because one of us fell off the wagon.

Temecula is wonderful, I really think you will like it there. I am telling you Henrys Market is the best, I miss that store sooo much. And remember Pechanga Casino will cook you a beautiful and tasty meal if you call in advance. For 25 bucks a person it is so well worth it, the chef there loves to cook for us, it is different and he really enjoys doing it.

I am still trying to get used to being up here in Northern CA, we are doing good.

OH, I did get married since this thread came back up. Mike and I got married on May 18th =)

lol that was the day I had a smoke, I was a bit stressed...

Judyin Philly Enthusiast
Judyin Philly
Posted
Hi Judy!

lol I am at work trying to move along slowly so I dont run out of work. I am good =) I am so thrilled that everyone has come to this thread for support, it has turned into a great place for support. I will continue to be here everyday, I just felt so bad.

I am so lucky that you all understand and I should have come here for support. I just didnt want to let anyone down or cause someone to smoke because one of us fell off the wagon.

Temecula is wonderful, I really think you will like it there. I am telling you Henrys Market is the best, I miss that store sooo much. And remember Pechanga Casino will cook you a beautiful and tasty meal if you call in advance. For 25 bucks a person it is so well worth it, the chef there loves to cook for us, it is different and he really enjoys doing it.

I am still trying to get used to being up here in Northern CA, we are doing good.

OH, I did get married since this thread came back up. Mike and I got married on May 18th =)

lol that was the day I had a smoke, I was a bit stressed...

Ok Jen..........we'll both come here daily.

If that's ok. I need the support to keep FOCUSED on making this move possible.

Sure i want the cig esp. after i just finished up some stinky painting that gives me a headache.....but.....will type instead and do some deep breathing.

i still want a 'reward' after hard work. Wish i could eat chocolate like i did when i quit before but chocolate is out for me now. There isn't much in the way of food that's a treat i'm allowed to eat.

well to start on you wedding day.......i can sure get that one.

we'll just post daily as a way to ck in and maybe the smoking thread will stay up front and more people will join.

I'm not sure about the depression b/c I was getting it in Nov but attributed it to missing my son for all the holidays but after the Jan trip to CA it really made me aware we wanted to move to be closer to him and enjoy the weather so................ the depression, pain management and with drawl were all mixed together I guess.

You might not need a med for sure I'm just saying for me, it was a help but didn't need the other times i quit.

So happy for you and glad you came back.

Thanks for the Temecula pep talk.

Judy

msmini14 Enthusiast
msmini14
Posted
  • Author

hehe yes I will come here everday from now on.

I cant blame you for wanting to move closer to your son, I am sure he would love that.

My husband and I want to move out to the east coast to be near his family within the next two years if we can.

Why cant you eat chocolate anymore? That really sucks. I love chocolate but dang, I have to cut the dairy out but it is soooo hard lol.

msmini14 Enthusiast
msmini14
Posted
  • Author

Morning all,

Well I stuck the patch back on this morning and rode the staionary bike for awhile to get me moving lol. Why is it so easy to smoke? lol. Yet so hard to quit, all those dang chemicals and habits! I just need to break the habit again, that was the hardest part for me.

Then I get bored here at work and want to go outside and smoke because I am bored.

Anyway thought I would share that information. Hope you all are doing good.

mushroom Proficient
mushroom
Posted

I used to smoke when I was bored, too (at least I didn't have to go outside), but then I substituted food as a cure for boredom--tired of working, get up and get something to eat. That didn't work out too well either!!! Bored with what you're doing? Go to the water cooler and have a glass of water, maybe also a chat. And you need the fluids. And that way you have to take more potty breaks too!!!

msmini14 Enthusiast
msmini14
Posted
  • Author

lol Mushroom, I will have to give that a shot. I try to keep busy here at work. Just need to break those awful habits again, at least I know how to deal with it this time around.

Judyin Philly Enthusiast
Judyin Philly
Posted
lol Mushroom, I will have to give that a shot. I try to keep busy here at work. Just need to break those awful habits again, at least I know how to deal with it this time around.

Afternoon......well you got through the morning :lol:;)

Sent you a PM

Good Job Jen!

don't forget the rubber band snap.

back to work..............ARGGGGGGGGGGG

msmini14 Enthusiast
msmini14
Posted
  • Author

As you all know I had a slip up for awhile, I never smoked a cigarette but I was smoking black and mild wood tip cigars. Everytime I smoked one I thought, this is so much worse than smoking a cigarette. I am killing myself again.....

So on Monday I had my last 1/2 a cigar and stuck the patch on. Monday night I went through my butts to find one that might have a few drags left on it, which tasted horrible. So I threw all the butts away which I kept in a baggy since I threw my ashtray out in March.

So last night we finish dinner and the dishes, I start looking in my purse for something and what do I find??? A black and mild. What did I do? I took off my patch and smoked half of it, which later that evening I finished it because I knew if I didnt I would smoke it the next morning.

So I get up this morning, get on the bike again, I am doing good then all of a sudden it hits me. What I cant understand is why it seemed so easy the last time I quit? I was doing so good, I had the motivation and I was so happy I quit.

I feel like going to the store on my lunch and getting a pack of cigars, I was going to stop this morning then just made myself go straight to work. Then I think to myself, why is this so hard? So I decided to go back and read all the messages on this board. It kind of makes me sad to think how easy it was back in March and now I am having such a rough time.

Judyin Philly Enthusiast
Judyin Philly
Posted
What I cant understand is why it seemed so easy the last time I quit? I was doing so good, I had the motivation and I was so happy I quit.

So I decided to go back and read all the messages on this board. It kind of makes me sad to think how easy it was back in March and now I am having such a rough time.

promised I'd write in support each day

Terrible sick today but wanted you to know I hear you Jen

i'll write later until then....here is a love hug and hope it helps.

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted

Oh Jennifer--I'm sorry you're going through such a rough patch. Who knows why it's suddenly gotten harder for you now--life is busy happening all the time, and maybe right now there are other things going on that are taking more of your attention. The most important thing is--don't berate yourself. You're doing the best you can and that's all any of us can do. :)

You've done great--this is hard. Be gentle with yourself and take it all just an hour at a time if you have to. For lunch today--treat yourself to something yummy or do something else enjoyable. We're all here for you--I'm really glad you posted.

jerseyangel Proficient
jerseyangel
Posted

Feel better, Miss Judith :D

msmini14 Enthusiast
msmini14
Posted
  • Author
promised I'd write in support each day

Terrible sick today but wanted you to know I hear you Jen

i'll write later until then....here is a love hug and hope it helps.

Thank you Judy =) I really appreciate it hehe.

msmini14 Enthusiast
msmini14
Posted
  • Author
Oh Jennifer--I'm sorry you're going through such a rough patch. Who knows why it's suddenly gotten harder for you now--life is busy happening all the time, and maybe right now there are other things going on that are taking more of your attention. The most important thing is--don't berate yourself. You're doing the best you can and that's all any of us can do. :)

You've done great--this is hard. Be gentle with yourself and take it all just an hour at a time if you have to. For lunch today--treat yourself to something yummy or do something else enjoyable. We're all here for you--I'm really glad you posted.

Thank you and Judy for such a quick response, I really needed it. I need to change my frame of mind on this, that is why I went back and read all the posts again.

I am a non smoker..... I only feel this way because I smoked not because I quit.

To any of you who have recently quit, do your best not to light up again. Like other people have said dont put yourself through it twice, it is so hard.

I need a hobby lol, besides cooking and baking =)

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