Anyone Unemployed Or Divorced Because Of Celiac?

[Kathy59]

I am sooo scared..I lost my job because I used up all my FMLA; was Dx with celiac a month later..I have unemployment benefits and looking for work. Having great anxiety about working..some days I feel really good..others, like today..very tired, flat and nerve pain with spasms driving me crazy. Am I ready for work? Sometimes, I feel like a full time job will help me break the depression; other days I think how can I possibly do it? I am physically sweating just typing this. Any input?

[Lycopene]

My fiancee left me because of all this. 2.5 years together and she left me because I was sick. It's just so beyond me. I can't even imagine that someone is so uncaring and would do that. Ahhh. That was just over 7 weeks ago, so I'm still thinking about her daily and that's not helping. I wish I could just get over her like that, but I can't. Haha.

At least it helps to know that she is just a cruel and evil person. Right as I start to get better she up and leaves. Heh. People are insane, sometimes. You know?

[ianm]

Lycopene, she did you a favor. The wife leaving me turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to me.

[Lycopene]

I honestly have to agree with you, ianm. While I'm still upset about it and think about her a lot, I'm now beginning to realize how cruel of a person she was. With all of her lying and her tricks, it just wasn't worth it. It's true when they say "blinded by love." As much as I hate to admit to that.

In the long run, I'm definitely happy she left me. I'll get over her soon enough, and when that happens I'll be even better off. Personally, I'm just glad that I'm feeling healthier. (=

[nomogluten4me]

My fiancee left me because of all this. 2.5 years together and she left me because I was sick. It's just so beyond me. I can't even imagine that someone is so uncaring and would do that. Ahhh. That was just over 7 weeks ago, so I'm still thinking about her daily and that's not helping. I wish I could just get over her like that, but I can't. Haha.

At least it helps to know that she is just a cruel and evil person. Right as I start to get better she up and leaves. Heh. People are insane, sometimes. You know?

Sorry about your loss of a friend and loved one. In a sense, you're still in mourning. 2.5 years is a long time to be together. Take heart, you're on to bigger and better things my friend. I think she just couldn't handle that she would have to change some of her habits too, if she was going to marry you. That shows her insecurities and has nothing to do with you per se and it sheds light her major character flaw.

Personally, I believe you can use this situation to your advantage. In the future after you get to know a possible future date/relationship, tell them about your condition. You'll probably get one of four answers A) the "that's interesting ... now let's order a pizza with extra thick crust" response, and you'll know to stay away because that person is just plain evil! You may even want to grab two gluten free bread sticks, form a cross and slowly back away. B)the "all in your head... you're just plain crazy" response. Please from smacking them upside the head and make a witty comment like "no, it's not in my head, it's all in my gut, baby" or whereever your symptoms flare up and walk away. C) the "I can't deal with it" response, which you've probably just experienced and D) the "I completely understand, because I have (or have family members) celiacs disease." And with that response, it might just love and gluten free gravy from here on out.

Seriously though, I do feel for you, and hope you find peace with yourself and eventually with the woman who stabbed you in the back. Remember, we understand at least physically what you're going through and we all want the best for you in the future. Keep holding on and God Bless.

[Lycopene]

Thank you, nogluten4me. (: Still having a little bit of a rough time, but I'll be fine. I'm sure of it.

In reply to the first three responses though... definitely. Wouldn't touch that with a ten foot pole. Frustrating, but I'll be able to find the right one, I'm sure. (:

[Branny]

I began my SSI Dis back in 2001 ish? Leaving my relationship in the next couple of months (money is an issue for me) or I would have left quit a ways back. People who don't understand have no compassion and can be quit mentallly cruel about it all and my life is still worth much more than living in a negative house. Yours is too darlin, get out and get past the mate.

[sayccrn]

I think an awful lot of us can relate to this. I also have fibro and hypothyroid. Which I am just finding out could be from Celiac all along! My husband is still in denial about the fibro and it is going to be hell to switch everything to gluten-free. Thankfully he is out of town on a job til the end of Sept, so I can do this while he is gone and get everything out by the time he comes back.

Personally, now that I am a tad educated, think he's got it too, if not worse than I. But he would never change his diet or even admit that he does. Our marriage is tenuous as it is. This may be the breaking point. In retrospect and in educating myself, I believe that our marriage is this way because of his probable celiac. His personality completely changed, he's angry, paranoid, explosive, emotionally abusive and sometimes on the verge of physical.

I too believed in my vows when I said them, but the hell we have had to endure has just been that, hell! He doesn't see his behavior as bad as it is. and that's a problem too. I am hoping against all hope that maybe I can convince him, if I can switch the whole family over to gluten-free and he improves and I get the man I married back. Maybe that would convince him, and it probably won't happen until he slips off the gluten-free wagon and turns into a monster again. Then maybe he can see himself as others see his rage and stay gluten-free then maybe he can get off all those psych meds that only trim the edges of angry-ness. and we can all be normal? Has anyone else experienced this or am I just dreaming and he's just an @#$#@%$#!

If this works for his behavior not to mention his bowels and he doesn't see it, we are out of here! If he knows the solution and won't accept it or do what it takes then how much does he love us to begin with. Right? Plus, I am not going to be emotionally tortured when there is a fix for it! That will be an 'enough is enough' moment. Don't you think?

I hope everything works out well for you and you find peace. Sorry to rant on, just thought you'd like to hear another story to tell you: you are not alone!

sally

[Tonggie]

I am sooo scared..I lost my job because I used up all my FMLA; was Dx with celiac a month later..I have unemployment benefits and looking for work. Having great anxiety about working..some days I feel really good..others, like today..very tired, flat and nerve pain with spasms driving me crazy. Am I ready for work? Sometimes, I feel like a full time job will help me break the depression; other days I think how can I possibly do it? I am physically sweating just typing this. Any input?

I understand that feeling. I do not feel I am reliable anymore. I do not know from minute to minute how I am going to feel.

Really do not like to commit to anything including going somewhere with a friend. I take a 2mg valium at night before I go to bed that helps with the spasms. I get a lot of facial pain sometimes I a have to take 10mg of flexaril. I go to the massage school for a cheap massage that really helps with the muscle spasms. I do not even want to do volunteer work because I just never know how I am going to feel. I need to see a nutritionist to help me get the right balance in my diet. It is all over the place. I started taking walks and that does help with the anxiety and leg pain.

[Tonggie]

Hi, newbe here, just wondering if anyone else has been through the same hell I have and how they are coping. I just discovered I have been suffering with celiac and have been missdiagnosed by EVERY doctor I've been to for the last 10+ years.

The last three years have been rough, starting with my wife devorcing me when I began having health problems, I was missdiagnosed by a rhuematolagist and put on chemotherapy to shut down my amune system in order to treat my "arthritis", then a year and a half later lost my job due to my increasing health issues related to the undiagnosed celiac dissease.

Has anyone else had a spouse, boss or doctor treat you like you're just a lazy hypochondriac that should just suck it up and shut up?

Thanks,

D.L.

OMG, I had a doctor who I asked 5yrs ago to run the Celiac Test and he told me I did not have Celiacs. I have been sick for years finally got my disability and went to a GI doctor at Johns Hopkins told him all of my complaints he looked and me and said you have Celiac Diseae. I went back to the doctor and told him what I have and said Mmmm I do not know much about Celiacs Disease, I was ready to give him the riot act. I swear it just makes you wonder. He had referred me to a neurologist and you could read the body language. I know he told her I was just a complainer needless to say I did not return to see her. Found a good neurologist one at Johns Hopkins. I was able to get a fresh start with out my former doctor ear bending the doctors. I swear I think he just wanted me to stay sick. He has destroyed me finacially. I do not understand why he would not write the order for the blood work I was paying out of pocket. I could have been better 5yrs ago What a Jerk!

I have been diagnoised with fibro, trigeminal neuralgia, rheum and mental issues. I knew they were all wrong. I kept telling them it was that. Then I was told I do not listen. Thank God I didn't because they were the idiots ! Now that I have gone Gluten Free I am feeling better. I will know at the end of Sept how much damage is done after the colonoscopy. I was given chemo also I kept telling them I think I am allergic to it because my throat swelled shut for 4 days. Could not eat with projctile vomiting. They told me that was impossible. I knew something and the meds did not agree with me !! I found out the meds contained wheat products ~ Well that is why doctors call it Practice ! They really do not know as much as they think they do.

My family thought I was lazy and faking. No compassion from my friends along with being sick I had to battle with family and friends and doctors. I was ready to give up soon ~

Just amazing how people can do ya ~ I could never do to people the way people did me !

Good luck I hope you are doing better.

Terry in Baltimore

[TiffersAnn]

For years my mother had to call off work due to un-diagnosed Celiac related issues. She was threatened by her boss that if she called off one more time she would be terminated... so when a week later she had a migraine, couldn't leave the bathroom and was hallucinating she was fired. Thank heavens that happened because then she moved to Cincinnati and was almost immediately diagnosed with Celiac on her first trip to the ER. Being fired, for my mom, was the best thing ever.

She's been gluten-free since 2003 and still lives in Cincinnati.

[pebbles]

Ive been gluten-free for several years, but have contracted leaky gut with more food problems. Added more diet changes for the last two months trying to heal. My home and work life is less than supportive. My hubby thinks its good that I'm on my diet, however, he will not change any of his eating habits because he shouldn't be dammed for my disease. I'm also frustrated that I don't know anyone else with the disease. People treat me like I'm a baby because I won't eat like everyone else. For me, the dietary changes are a pain, but my emotional state has suffered more than my physical problems.

[Terri O]

Ive been gluten-free for several years, but have contracted leaky gut with more food problems. Added more diet changes for the last two months trying to heal. My home and work life is less than supportive. My hubby thinks its good that I'm on my diet, however, he will not change any of his eating habits because he shouldn't be dammed for my disease. I'm also frustrated that I don't know anyone else with the disease. People treat me like I'm a baby because I won't eat like everyone else. For me, the dietary changes are a pain, but my emotional state has suffered more than my physical problems.

WOW! That could be my husband that you are talking about! "glad you feel better Honey, can you just get on with life now and quit talking about it?"

Yeah...thanks for all the support! NOT! Terri O

[Langenke]

My relationship and career has suffered greatly because of Celiac. I was diagnosed a year ago now and I am still trying to get my life back on track. I had to quit my firt "real" job out of college at a great firm because I lost so much weight and was struggling to survive everyday. I never told them what I had, I said it was from mold in my apt! I think they still think I was just "weird and lazy" which still is a wound for me to this day. Truth be told though, I feel blessed I got out when I did. That kind of work I don't beleive would have ever brought me happiness.

I have so much respect for all of you and feel better knowing there are others out there that have gone through my struggle as well. I am changing careers right now, into a field that is less demanding on 13 hour days. Hopefully that'll help! Celiac honestly took a good three years away from my life where I was so sick I could not do much. I spent two months not even being able to get out of bed, and countless hospital visits before I finally figured it out! The doctors never figured me out until I suggested I get tested....strange huh?

I beleive I have had this stince I was about 3 years old as well. I remember eating a donut when younger and instantly getting sick, and a migraine. This pattern repeated itself until my teen years where I voluntarily tried to avoid all bread. All I knew was it made me feel terrible. Everyone just thought I was a fussy child. Kinda funny now that I look back at it. I am 25 years old now. I feel grateful that I am younger, and can still move on from this. It has been a long journey so far though. It has been one year since I have been sick or in the hospital for anything, and I am so grateful!

[unsinkable777]

YES indeed, my health has played havoc with my life! I just recently was "laid off" a wonderful job I had held and loved for 10 yrs, due to my increasing illness (Celiac/IBS/Hypoglycemia/Depression). They knew they couldn't cite my health as the reason, so they made up a lot of very hurtful, malicious reasons. Of course, the stress of being unemployed is now causing lots of symptoms to flare up, making me feel like I will never be able to work again.

My 1st husband was a very healthy person who believed that if you were sick your mind just wasn't strong enough - like that you were just "giving in". He never believed any of my problems were real, even after being diagnosed. We lasted 30 yrs, but the last 10 were miserable. I assumed that no man would want me, with all my health issues, and remained single for 8 yrs, but then a wonderful thing happened. God sent me a kind, patient, empathetic gentleman who loves me unconditionally. I feel very very blessed, and we are ecstatically happy. We have been married a year and a half, and I never knew life could be this good

Does anyone else out there have this cluster of problems that all seem interconnected? Celiac/IBS/Hypoglycemia/Depression/Acid reflux ??

All the best my fellow "troopers"

[moose07]

I think my illness contributed to my divorce. I was sick for most of my two year marriage and wasn't diagnosed with celiacs until after we had separated but I still think my ex couldn't handle that I was sick all the time and I really couldn't either. Now it is harder to date because I have celiacs. I've dated a couple people who have tried to be really supportive at first but I know eventually it became a problem.

[manasota]

Wow.  Just found this old topic.  I think it needs to be brought up-to-date.  Reading the forum these days makes me feel it's my fault if I don't get well.  So many of the people posting seem to have all the answers to getting well--quickly!  Not so for me.

I lost my career 15 years ago due to undiagnosed Celiac.  They held my position for a year.  I had had excellent annual reviews/raises.  It took another 10 years to get diagnosed.  Now, I've been gluten free for 5 1/2 years.  Still too sick and tired to work.  Can't be upright (standing/sitting) for any length of time.  Gut pains intermittently--same as 15 years ago.  I have had much healing--just not enough to be able to work.  I have tried everything (food diary, exercise, meditation, etc.).

Luckily, I have a very understanding husband (who is disabled due to spinal issues).  Luckily, we like and love each other in spite of all the illness we have had to endure.  The pain can be overwhelming.  I keep trying to focus on the love.  Pain can make you crazy.

Luckily, we were great savers and always lived well within our means. We sold our house and now rent.  It's cheaper.   We live off our savings.  I don't know how we aren't bankrupt.  Something magical is happening here.  Not sure what we'll do when we run out of money. I always expected to get well enough to work again.  I loved to work.  Certainly can't imagine filing for SSDI now--15 years after the fact!