Mother Diagnosed, Wont Go On Diet

[ratty89]

Since being diagnosed, after reading alot of information about Celiacs I noticed some family members (mainly my mother, her sister, her brother, and my brother) having alot of symptoms/signs of celiacs. My mothers sister developed Type 1 diabeties in her 20s which the Drs said was bought on by stress. My mothers brother had bad stomach problems, they called it a 'nervous stomach'. My mother suffers from anxiety, brain fog, miagranes, skin reactions to food AND she was even postively diagnosed as having wheat/oat/barley/malt/nightshade allergy about 10 years ago. My brother has all the classic signs of celiacs. Hes been tested before through blood tests which were negative (same happened to me) and also a biopsy which was negative too but hes covinced hes got it from his symptoms etc.

The problem is, my mother wont stop eating wheat and so on. She says she tried it when she was first diagnosed, and her brain fog went away etc but it was too hard to do whilst bringing up kids. Shes got no children at home anymore but still says the diet would be too hard etc. Ive explaiined to her the dangers of continuing on with eating wheat etc when shes been medically diagnosed as intollerant but she still plays the 'its too hard' card....even though she manages to cook me lovely gluten/dairy/corn/soy free meals when I visit without too much effort.

My brother is currently living with other people and says its too hard for him to eat gluten-free at the moment because of CC etc it wouldnt be worth it. I was a bit sceptical of this excuse too, as Im sure no one is 100% gluten-free in the first stage of their new diets but he is going to be moving out in two months so he should be eating gluten-free pretty soon. Plus hes been experimenting with gluten-free flours is cooking which is cool.

I hope once my brother gets into the diet properly that his improvements will also help to convice my mother to stop eating wheat etc but Im not sure if that would work, or how long that would even take....

Does anyone have any suggestions about anything else I could do to convince my mother going on this diet is the right thing to do? She seems to be rather in denial...

[mushroom]

I am afraid we all have relatives in denial, one of my sisters being amongst them. Two sayings come to mind: "You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink", and "There are none so blind as those who will not see." Your mother seems a classic case. She probably figures if it hasn't killed her yet, why bother?? And really probably has no idea how much better she could feel, and values the gluteny foods more than feeling better, i.e., gluten addicted. All you can do is make sure she is informed (like give her printouts of what other horrible diseases celiac causes) and continue to express your concern for her.

[GottaSki]

I think the only thing you can do is continue to talk about the positive changes in your life since eating the correct food for your body.

If your Mom was diagnosed a long time ago, perhaps she doesn't understand the disease as well as you. She may not be absorbing information you are telling her -- sometimes we don't listen and learn from those closest to us.

Here's a link for a discussion about celiac from UCSD's celiac center. I found it very helpful when we were learning about what celiac disease is and can mean to our future heath.

Happy Thanksgiving to you!

[jststric]

ditto with the others. Just like alot of diabetics that eat too much bread or whatnot, they know what they are doing and making a conscious desicion. Most adult children cannot successfully "tell" their parents anything. It just goes against their grain to listen to their children as if they are children too. Do and live the way you choose and let her do her thing. I would quit telling her anything for awhile. If ANYTHING would get through to her, I would think it would be information on the higher-risk of digestive cancers. But if she's like my family, she will mouth off about "going to die of something someday anyway". Let her be.

[nmlove]

That stinks but until she's ready to change, nothing will do it. I like the idea of providing info and seeing improvements in you and your brother. But until she's ready, that's about it. I'm sure anyone can relate, celiac or no. I can share two off the top of my head. My dad diagnosed with type 2 diabetes managed for awhile but is now probably killing himself with his beer. And once my MIL told me that she feels so much better when she eats "healthier" but that it gives her so much energy and makes her feel so good, that she wants to go, go, go and do stuff. But my FIL doesn't so for her the extra energy "isn't worth it." Crazy.

[Jennifer2]

I think, like almost anything, it's as easy or as hard as you make it. I'd personally try convincing her that it's not that hard.

For me at least, the change hasn't been all that hard. For me, the hardest part has been giving up the convenience of pre-processed, pre-prepared, and fast foods. But even that even has an upside, home-made food simply tastes better.

I think most people on here will tell you, there is virtually nothing you can't have with a few substitutions!

[ang1e0251]

Sorry your mom won't make the change. I know the feeling. My sister won't even get tested. But I can only keep telling them how great I now feel. They know I have the info if they want it. If they want to slowly kill themselves, they are adults and able to make those choices. That hurts me as I feel they put little effort into their health but I cannot control what they do or think, only what I do. I choose to be proactive with my health.

[HS7474]

I can relate- I'm almost positive my brother has celiac disease but won't get tested. However, even if he found out he had celiac disease I doubt he would go gluten free. He doesn't have the willpower or the care.

[Juliebove]

Good luck with that! Although my mother doesn't have celiac, she was diagnosed with many food allerigies and was told to avoid wheat and nightshades because of arthritis. She pretty much eat what she wants and then complains when she is sick or hurting. She doesn't think the food that she eats could possibly have a thing to do with it and even makes snide comments about my daughter's and my own food allergies, saying we are too strict with our diets.

[MindytheOrganist]

Since being diagnosed, after reading alot of information about Celiacs I noticed some family members (mainly my mother, her sister, her brother, and my brother) having alot of symptoms/signs of celiacs. My mothers sister developed Type 1 diabeties in her 20s which the Drs said was bought on by stress. My mothers brother had bad stomach problems, they called it a 'nervous stomach'. My mother suffers from anxiety, brain fog, miagranes, skin reactions to food AND she was even postively diagnosed as having wheat/oat/barley/malt/nightshade allergy about 10 years ago. My brother has all the classic signs of celiacs. Hes been tested before through blood tests which were negative (same happened to me) and also a biopsy which was negative too but hes covinced hes got it from his symptoms etc.

The problem is, my mother wont stop eating wheat and so on. She says she tried it when she was first diagnosed, and her brain fog went away etc but it was too hard to do whilst bringing up kids. Shes got no children at home anymore but still says the diet would be too hard etc. Ive explaiined to her the dangers of continuing on with eating wheat etc when shes been medically diagnosed as intollerant but she still plays the 'its too hard' card....even though she manages to cook me lovely gluten/dairy/corn/soy free meals when I visit without too much effort.

My brother is currently living with other people and says its too hard for him to eat gluten-free at the moment because of CC etc it wouldnt be worth it. I was a bit sceptical of this excuse too, as Im sure no one is 100% gluten-free in the first stage of their new diets but he is going to be moving out in two months so he should be eating gluten-free pretty soon. Plus hes been experimenting with gluten-free flours is cooking which is cool.

I hope once my brother gets into the diet properly that his improvements will also help to convice my mother to stop eating wheat etc but Im not sure if that would work, or how long that would even take....

Does anyone have any suggestions about anything else I could do to convince my mother going on this diet is the right thing to do? She seems to be rather in denial...

My Mom was the same way with Type II diabetes. She refused to follow a decent diet and ate anything and everything she wanted, whenever she wanted. After many years, she has finally had it with feeling bad all the time, so she is in the process of consulting a dietician. Hopefully, your Mom will get fed up with feeling bad and take corrective actions. Hang in there and keep telling her how much better you feel.