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Coping With Watching Others Eat


BrownEyedGirl

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BrownEyedGirl Apprentice

I was diagnosed earlier this week and I've been gluten-free for four days. I live with my dad, and it's been hard to watch my dad eat stuff I can no longer have. I guess he doesn't really think about it, but he leaves stuff around the kitchen and I guess it just bothers me a little. I'm not tempted and I'm very dedicated to staying gluten-free, but it just ... sucks. Is there anyone else in the same situation? And if so, how do you cope with it?


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Jestgar Rising Star

You can start thinking about how you can make what he's eating in form that you can eat. Think of it as a challenge.

Roda Rising Star

I guess at first if bothered me some, but now I don't care. My MIL is always appoligizing to me when she eats something I can't have. I keep telling her I don't care and it does not bother me. The notion of what would happen to me if I did eat it is not so pleasent so I keep that in mind. It will get easier. As for him leaving stuff around, are you and him being conscienous of cross contamination? You need your own dedicated area and if you share condiments they need to be either squeeze bottles, him trained to scoop and drop, or you need separate.

BrownEyedGirl Apprentice

I guess at first if bothered me some, but now I don't care. My MIL is always appoligizing to me when she eats something I can't have. I keep telling her I don't care and it does not bother me. The notion of what would happen to me if I did eat it is not so pleasent so I keep that in mind. It will get easier. As for him leaving stuff around, are you and him being conscienous of cross contamination? You need your own dedicated area and if you share condiments they need to be either squeeze bottles, him trained to scoop and drop, or you need separate.

For the most part, yes. I have my food in a cabinet, which is not in the main pantry away from everything else. Our foods in the refrigerator and freezer are together though. Right now, he has a package of bread, cookies, box of cereal sitting out on the counter, but I was planning on going through and making sure everything is seperated today. We're not sharing condiments at all .. I have my own stuff.

glutenfreeinminnesota Contributor

I will be honest, at first it REALLY sucks...and now it just kind of sucks...sometimes. My boyfriend is a gluten eater and LOVES Papa Murphys Pizza (also used to be my favorite). So, when he brings that home, the house smells like it for days. I am never tempted to eat it of course, but it makes me sad sometimes. Then I usually go and make my own pizza the next day to fill the house with my gluten-free Pizza aromas :) I go to my parents and they always have homemade cookies out. I am getting used to it, and really try not to think about what I can't eat, and focus on all the good stuff I CAN eat, and how much better I feel because of it. For whatever reason our bodies decided gluten wasn't a good thing for us...really, I don't think it's good for anyone. So, in the end I am healthy then most people I know because of the things I can't eat anymore. Just think of it that way :) Once you get into the routine, it's not so bad living with a gluten eater. Good luck!

kareng Grand Master

It is really hard at first. I'm not tempted but feel sad. Also, I have to watch for old habits like snitching a goldfish cracker as a kid goes by. First day I went gluten-free, I made a glutinous PB&J for kid school lunch. After I wrapped it, I had PB on fingers & just licked them without thinking. :P

Told the boys that the jar of pretzels on the counter had to go as that was one of my favorite things. Now, about 10 weeks later, my 14 year old buys small bags of pretzels at school but won't eat them in front of me. I told him that it was OK to eat them but he said that I am not ready for that. When I am, he will eat them in front of me. He takes better care of me then I do. :wub:

Also, as you find things you like, it gets easier. This is my excuse to eat things I like that no one else in the family likes.

ciavyn Contributor

I think it affects everyone differently. Outside of really good, home made rolls and breads, I never was much for bready items. I ate cake because someone made it, or it was a birthday party, etc...did I need cake? NO. Did I end up eating ice cream too, because I'd rather have that? Yeppers.

So perhaps take stock of what you ate because it was the social thing to do, or good etiquette, and think about the things you'll really miss. Some of those, you'll just have to deal with -- I have no idea how to make some of the candy bars I really liked, like Kit Kat -- but there are so many that you can make yourself, and you'll be surprised how much better they are! Case in point: brownies and fried rice. My gluten-free brownies are way better than Duncan Hines and Betty Crocker. My Fried Rice tastes like heaven, compared to the chinese restaurant.

give yourself time, and don't be afraid to explain to your dad that you need him to be careful where he leaves his food. If you start cooking and baking, pretty soon he won't want that junk anyway! gluten-free is so much tastier! ;)


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BrownEyedGirl Apprentice

I think it affects everyone differently. Outside of really good, home made rolls and breads, I never was much for bready items. I ate cake because someone made it, or it was a birthday party, etc...did I need cake? NO. Did I end up eating ice cream too, because I'd rather have that? Yeppers.

So perhaps take stock of what you ate because it was the social thing to do, or good etiquette, and think about the things you'll really miss. Some of those, you'll just have to deal with -- I have no idea how to make some of the candy bars I really liked, like Kit Kat -- but there are so many that you can make yourself, and you'll be surprised how much better they are! Case in point: brownies and fried rice. My gluten-free brownies are way better than Duncan Hines and Betty Crocker. My Fried Rice tastes like heaven, compared to the chinese restaurant.

give yourself time, and don't be afraid to explain to your dad that you need him to be careful where he leaves his food. If you start cooking and baking, pretty soon he won't want that junk anyway! gluten-free is so much tastier! ;)

He already is willing to eat more gluten-free ... haha. I found this recipe for a blueberry and banana gluten-free breakfast cake and made it this morning. I think I might have to hide it from him now ... it's soooo good. :)

ciavyn Contributor

He already is willing to eat more gluten-free ... haha. I found this recipe for a blueberry and banana gluten-free breakfast cake and made it this morning. I think I might have to hide it from him now ... it's soooo good. :)

Woohoo! See, it gets easier over time. You'll probably have a few more rebellious frustrations that you just want to eat everything you shouldn't...but it will get easier in time. :) It's all about retraining your taste buds and eating habits.

Reba32 Rookie

The only thing that bothered me was my lazy (now ex) husband wouldn't be bothered to wipe the counters after himself after he got crumbs everywhere. I've been glutened a few times.

But seeing and smelling the food itself doesn't bother me in the least. I remember the pain and bloating and pain and can't even fathom wanting that ever again. There are plenty of healthy alternatives, I don't miss the gluteny stuff at all.

jenngolightly Contributor

I was diagnosed earlier this week and I've been gluten-free for four days. I live with my dad, and it's been hard to watch my dad eat stuff I can no longer have. I guess he doesn't really think about it, but he leaves stuff around the kitchen and I guess it just bothers me a little. I'm not tempted and I'm very dedicated to staying gluten-free, but it just ... sucks. Is there anyone else in the same situation? And if so, how do you cope with it?

It's really hard in the beginning. What helps is finding alternatives. gluten-free and DF doesn't mean that you can't have yummy treats. There are cookies, pretzels, and brownies galore! Bread, too (try Udi's). The downside is that they're expensive. When I first went gluten-free, my family was still gluteny. Now, they prefer my gluten-free food and our shopping bill is much higher. A loaf of Udi's is $4.50. It's much smaller than a regular loaf of bread, but my family is addicted to it. Pamela's makes fantastic pancakes and my family devours whatever I make with her mix. My family also loves Udi's pizza crust. They used to eat Papa Murphy's until I one time when we were snowed-in and I made them gluten-free pizza. Now that's all we eat.

Find substitutes that will take your mind off the gluteny food you used to love. One thing that I still suffer from is when we go to the mall and walk past the soft pretzel store. Yummy. I don't have a substitute recipe for that yet.

Skylark Collaborator

This is going to sound weird, but I decided to simply enjoy the smell of foods I can't have any more. I look at them as you would an interesting-smelling scented candle. My lab often has pizza, and it smells wonderful. The smell makes me hungry so I do make sure I have something to eat for myself. I don't get upset wandering by Cinnabon in a mall now. Instead I enjoy the calorie-free rich scent of bread and cinnamon. Friends will apologize if they're baking and I'm visiting, and I can genuinely tell them how much I am enjoying the smell of their baking bread. I have become a connoisseur of glutinous fragrance.

As far as being tempted by stuff around the kitchen, it really helps to have food that you like around as well. The feelings of deprivation go away when you can dig into the freezer for ice cream, you know there is a stash of Dove chocolate somewhere, or you have your own good gluten-free bread.

andiewilson10 Newbie

I have been gluten-free for close to 2 months now. Like i've told my boyfriend, I feel like a glutenoholic and he is my interventionist. I used to stare at other peoples food when we would go out, feel left out, miss the pasta/bread/drinks etc. I would also forget that i had to be gluten-free and take a sip of a friends mixed drink or try a bite of a new food dish. I think it really helps to have a family member or friend behind you to support you and remind you. My boyfriend has been pretty close to gluten-free with me the entire time. when i'm not around he'll eat what he wants, but when we cook together it is always gluten-free. he helps me stay on track and makes sure my restuarant meals are gluten-free and reminds me of the consequences. if i didn't have him, i don't think i would have been as strict for this long. It gets easier. I'm sure when it's my birthday, thanksgiving, christmas it'll get hard again, but we all have to be strong. Just remember that you have a disease that you can control through diet alone. Thank the lord that you don't have to be on pills every day.

mary4 Newbie

For me it was just the matter of finding a good subsitute for all the stuff I used to enjoy. And so i don't feel less privileged because i can eat whatever everyone else is and mine are good tasting gluten-free products.

Especially now when I basically got accustomed to the gluten-free diet and my family is very helpful as well.

Can't say it's always easy like eating out or attending parties can still be difficult. Though I always make sure to bring along some of my own gluten-free goodies!

  • 2 weeks later...
one more mile Contributor

I get high from gluten, so watching someone eat gluten is often like watching someone do heroin for me. Sometimes a drool sometimes I think the bite though and decide I really done want to be sick and sometimes I figure out how to make the thing gluten free. I make sure I give myself a treat on a regular basis so that I do not feel deprived. When I feel deprived is when the gluten stuff really bugs me.

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