Jump to content

  • Welcome to Celiac.com!

    You have found your celiac tribe! Join us and ask questions in our forum, share your story, and connect with others.



  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A1):

    Celiac.com Sponsor (A1-M):

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Our Content
    eNewsletter
    Donate

Celiac Roommate

john2712s

Recommended Posts

john2712s Newbie
john2712s
Posted

Hi everyone,

I realize this is the opposite of what you're used to, but here goes: I am not a celiac, but my roommate is. I knew this before we decided to live together, and agreed not to use flour in the kitchen, which I don't, we have separate dishes for if I cook pasta or fry something glutinous, we even have separate sponges for washing glutinous dishes. Now here is my beef: my roommate is currently dating a non-celiac, and spending most days in his partner's apartment, (cooking), but... the partner isn't gluten free! they share dishes, and he's even baked BREAD in the kitchen. I've even seen them share dips that were gluten contaminated. Furthermore, this roommate often eats out, and I feel like all my hard work is going to waste, and I'm fed up of trying to hard to keep things gluten free. How/can I bring this up with my roommate? How would you, as a celiac, react to a non celiac friend pointing out all the ways you are not being careful? I figure its hard enough, but I'd like to know if as a celiac you think this is normal, or if said roommate might not be as sensitive as he thinks?

Any input would be appreciated

Thanks!

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


Di2011 Enthusiast
Di2011
Posted

Hi everyone,

I realize this is the opposite of what you're used to, but here goes: I am not a celiac, but my roommate is. I knew this before we decided to live together, and agreed not to use flour in the kitchen, which I don't, we have separate dishes for if I cook pasta or fry something glutinous, we even have separate sponges for washing glutinous dishes. Now here is my beef: my roommate is currently dating a non-celiac, and spending most days in his partner's apartment, (cooking), but... the partner isn't gluten free! they share dishes, and he's even baked BREAD in the kitchen. I've even seen them share dips that were gluten contaminated. Furthermore, this roommate often eats out, and I feel like all my hard work is going to waste, and I'm fed up of trying to hard to keep things gluten free. How/can I bring this up with my roommate? How would you, as a celiac, react to a non celiac friend pointing out all the ways you are not being careful? I figure its hard enough, but I'd like to know if as a celiac you think this is normal, or if said roommate might not be as sensitive as he thinks?

Any input would be appreciated

Thanks!

How incredibly frustrating for you. And how incredibly irresponsible of your roommate. Did he really bake regular gluten full BREAD ?!?!?!?!? What a dufus ! (Do you use this word in Nth America?)

You need to be honest with him about what this is doing to your head and your patience. No one should have to watch on and play along to such double standards.

ravenwoodglass Mentor
ravenwoodglass
Posted

Wish all roommates were as great as you about being careful.

Is this girlfreind a pretty new one? If he really likes her he may feel if he 'sticks to the rules' around her it will be too much for her and he will lose her. Do you have a good relationship with the girlfreind? If you do you could talk to her about it or maybe help him to do so.

kareng Grand Master
kareng
Posted

I think i'ld say something to my roommate ( who appears to be a close friend). I might point out that gas, bloating & calling the new " friend" by the wrong name ( brain fog) are not very romantic.. I would ask if the new love knows about the Celiac. If so, maybe offer to explain cc and safe kitchen procedures to him ( her). If not, the new love needs to know right away.

In the end, all we can do is encourage & nag. He's an adult.

Takala Enthusiast
Takala
Posted

Okay, I have a sort of devious idea.

Invite her over for a meal that you will prepare, for all 3 or 4 of you to have together, (you can invite another SO or friend, and even let them in on joke) to be gluten free. ;) And while serving this, you can make sort of a Big Deal Out of It, casually, like "and this is the risotto that was prepared to be GLUTEN FREE, so I used the Lundberg brand," or "I hope you like Tinkyada ? I made the sauce for it myself, from scratch," and "Oh, No, we don't use THAT BRAND of bread because it's not GLUTEN FREE, we use {whatever, like Udi's} and we want to keep our apartment safe for [name of ingrate roomate] so please use that cutting board for the gluten free bread when making the sandwich. Whoops, not that butter, it's cross contaminated, this one." "Oh, wait, not that spatula, this dedicated one." "Here, have these rice crackers with the cheese, not those. " "I made this bread myself from the Pamela's mix, in the microwave in a bowl, I hope you like it." "Chebe breadstick ? Aren't they great?" "Have another taco. I made sure this brand of tortilla was gluten free and manufactured in a facility that tested for cc, btw."

You get the idea.

I don't know if he'd be speaking to you the next week, but it would be worth it to see the look on his face. ^_^

domesticactivist Collaborator
domesticactivist
Posted

I love it, Takala!

pricklypear1971 Community Regular
pricklypear1971
Posted

I have a sneaking suspicion the gluten intolerant roommate couldn't care less, and trying to embarrass him/her won't do a bit of good. Subtleties are lost on those in heat....

If the gluten-free roomie is not being gluten-free, it will backfire soon. Just be patient...don't abandon gluten-free habits in the shared house yet...because s/he will be back in the diet soon or completely give it up (and you can totally stop worrying about it).

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):
Celiac.com Sponsor (A8):

Celiac.com Sponsor (A8-M):


sariesue Explorer
sariesue
Posted

I agree with pricklypear that he'll pay sooner or later, also you pointing out how bad he is treating his celiac could really make things tense between the two of you. You really have no place to be correcting his mistakes on his diet unless he asks or starts b%$@#ing about how poorly he feels. But, if you bring it up on your own you could distroy your friendship and make the rest of the year living hell.

WW340 Rookie
WW340
Posted

I think I would just say something like "hey, I notice you are not on the gluten free diet right now, so can we relax the rules at home for now?"

Or, "now that you are taking a break from the diet, I am going to relax the rules at home. Just let me know when you want to go back to a safer kitchen."

Or something similar. The point being, let him know you are aware and not judging, but would like a break while he takes his break.

bartfull Rising Star
bartfull
Posted

I wonder if he's the type of person who, when he finally DOES get sick, will blame it on you. You are keeping your promise to have a safe kitchen, but if he gets sick, he probably won't blame his new sweetheart. And although we all know he should blame HIMSELF, it's human nature to find someone else to blame.

I would talk to him about it. Just lay your cards on the table, let him know that you are concerned, and then the ball is in his court.

john2712s Newbie
john2712s
Posted
  • Author

Thanks so much everyone! You guys are great, I used this forum a lot to understand celiac's, and it's been a great ressource!

kareng Grand Master
kareng
Posted

Thanks so much everyone! You guys are great, I used this forum a lot to understand celiac's, and it's been a great ressource!

So.....don't leave us in suspense What did you do?

dilettantesteph Collaborator
dilettantesteph
Posted

I came back here because I was wondering the same thing. What happened? I also want to say that you seem like a great guy to be so caring about your roommate. It seems he is blinded by love.

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Go to topic listing

  • Get Celiac.com Updates:
    Support Celiac.com:
    Join eNewsletter
    Donate
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A17):
    Celiac.com Sponsor (A17):



    Celiac.com Sponsors (A17-M):



  • Recent Activity

    1. chrisinpa
      - chrisinpa commented on Scott Adams's article in Skin Problems and Celiac Disease
      2

      Celiac Disease and Skin Disorders: Exploring a Genetic Connection

      Maybe they can attribute certain skin conditions to either being susceptible to getting Celiac......or the other way around....but I have to ask if certain people are prone to Celiac because of genetics and some people aren't. It's kind of the same thing as what came first.....the chicken or the egg.?
    2. knitty kitty
      - knitty kitty replied to xxnonamexx's topic in Post Diagnosis, Recovery & Treatment of Celiac Disease
      3

      My journey is it gluten or fiber?

      @xxnonamexx, There's labeling on those Trubar gluten free high fiber protein bars that say: "Manufactured in a facility that also processes peanuts, milk, soy, fish, WHEAT, sesame, and other tree nuts." You may want to avoid products made in shared facilities. If you are trying to add more fiber to your diet to ease constipation, considering...
    3. trents
      - trents replied to sha1091a's topic in Celiac Disease Pre-Diagnosis, Testing & Symptoms
      1

      Issues before diagnosis

      Welcome to celiac.com @sha1091a! Your experience is a very common one. Celiac disease is one the most underdiagnosed and misdiagnosed medical conditions out there. The reasons are numerous. One key one is that its symptoms mimic so many other diseases. Another is ignorance on the part of the medical community with regard to the range of symptoms that celiac...
    4. trents
      - trents commented on Jefferson Adams's article in Other Diseases and Disorders Associated with Celiac Disease
      6

      Celiac Disease Patients Face Higher Risk of Systemic Lupus

      What kind of practitioner did the blood test? Was this a medical doctor, a naturopathic doctor, a GI doc? I would certainly follow up with them and ask why they advised you not to eat red meat. I mean, it could be something like they, themselves, are a vegetarian and give that advice to everyone. Have you had an endoscopy with biopsy of the small bowel...
    5. knitty kitty
      - knitty kitty replied to EndlessSummer's topic in Food Intolerance & Leaky Gut
      2

      Dizziness after eating green beans?

      @EndlessSummer, You said you had an allergy to trees. People with Birch Allergy can react to green beans (in the legume family) and other vegetables, as well as some fruits. Look into Oral Allergy Syndrome which can occur at a higher rate in Celiac Disease. Switching to a low histamine diet for a while can give your body time to rid itself of...
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A19):

  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      132,689
    • Most Online (within 30 mins)
      7,748
    EndlessSummer
    Newest Member
    EndlessSummer
    Joined
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A20):
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A22):

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      121.5k
    • Total Posts
      1m
  • Celiac.com Sponsor (A21):

  • Who's Online (See full list)

  • Upcoming Events

  • Posts

    • knitty kitty
      My journey is it gluten or fiber?

      By knitty kitty · Posted

      @xxnonamexx, There's labeling on those Trubar gluten free high fiber protein bars that say: "Manufactured in a facility that also processes peanuts, milk, soy, fish, WHEAT, sesame, and other tree nuts." You may want to avoid products made in shared facilities.   If you are trying to add more fiber to your diet to ease constipation, considering eating more leafy green vegetables and cruciferous vegetables.  Not only are these high in fiber, they also are good sources of magnesium.  Many newly diagnosed are low in magnesium and B vitamins and suffer with constipation.  Thiamine Vitamin B1 and magnesium work together.  Thiamine in the form Benfotiamine has been shown to improve intestinal health.  Thiamine and magnesium are important to gastrointestinal health and function.  
    • trents
      Issues before diagnosis

      By trents · Posted

      Welcome to celiac.com @sha1091a! Your experience is a very common one. Celiac disease is one the most underdiagnosed and misdiagnosed medical conditions out there. The reasons are numerous. One key one is that its symptoms mimic so many other diseases. Another is ignorance on the part of the medical community with regard to the range of symptoms that celiac disease can produce. Clinicians often are only looking for classic GI symptoms and are unaware of the many other subsystems in the body that can be damaged before classic GI symptoms manifest, if ever they do. Many celiacs are of the "silent" variety and have few if any GI symptoms while all along, damage is being done to their bodies. In my case, the original symptoms were elevated liver enzymes which I endured for 13 years before I was diagnosed with celiac disease. By the grace of God my liver was not destroyed. It is common for the onset of the disease to happen 10 years before you ever get a diagnosis. Thankfully, that is slowly changing as there has developed more awareness on the part of both the medical community and the public in the past 20 years or so. Blessings!
    • knitty kitty
      Dizziness after eating green beans?

      By knitty kitty · Posted

      @EndlessSummer, You said you had an allergy to trees.  People with Birch Allergy can react to green beans (in the legume family) and other vegetables, as well as some fruits.  Look into Oral Allergy Syndrome which can occur at a higher rate in Celiac Disease.   Switching to a low histamine diet for a while can give your body time to rid itself of the extra histamine the body makes with Celiac disease and histamine consumed in the diet.   Vitamin C and the eight B vitamins are needed to help the body clear histamine.   Have you been checked for nutritional deficiencies?
    • sha1091a
      Issues before diagnosis

      By sha1091a · Posted

      I found out the age of 68 that I am a celiac. When I was 16, I had my gallbladder removed when I was 24 I was put on a medication because I was told I had fibromyalgia.   going to Doctor’s over many years, not one of them thought to check me out for celiac disease. I am aware that it only started being tested by bloodwork I believe in the late 90s, but still I’m kind of confused why my gallbladder my joint pain flatulent that I complained of constantly was totally ignored. Is it not something that is taught to our medical system? It wasn’t a Doctor Who asked for the test to be done. I asked for it because of something I had read and my test came back positive. My number was quite high.Are there other people out here that had this kind of problems and they were ignored? 
    • trents
      Dizziness after eating green beans?

      By trents · Posted

      Welcome to celiac.com, @EndlessSummer! Do you react to all vegetables or just specific kinds or families of them? What you describe with green beans sounds like it has an anaphylaxis component. Like you, walnuts are a problem for me. They will often give me a scratchy throat so I try to avoid them. Does it matter if the vegies are raw or will-cooked in how you react to them?
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

NOTICE: This site places This site places cookies on your device (Cookie settings). on your device. Continued use is acceptance of our Terms of Use, and Privacy Policy.