No One Will Come Over To Eat At My House

[GFreeMO]

It's my Mom's Birthday this weekend so she and my Dad have been invited to my sisters house for a gluten fiesta. My sister always wins out because her and her husband have cute little kids. My husband and I don't have kids. Thanks celiac!

I invited my Mom and Dad to come over tonight for dinner since they are going over there on her Birthday. I gave my Mom 3 meals to pick from. These are normal everyday meals that most people would eat. She wont eat anything with olive oil, garlic or onions and I can't have any gluten, corn or dairy or soy so it is making it very difficult to come up with a meal. I suggested that I make roast beef with veggies and a crustless pumpkin pie. She wont eat it if it's cooked in olive oil and i make my pie with rice milk and she goes ewwww..yuck. It just really makes me so mad because it's not like I WANT to eat this way, I HAVE to eat this way. So now they are not coming and i'm getting depressed over it thinking of them all having fun at my sisters house and no one will come here.

[pricklypear1971]

You know, there's almost always something else going on when things like this come up, but I digress...

Since your family can't agree on food, why not do something else that doesn't involve food? Doesn't have to be a big thing, doesn't have to involve your sister - just you and your mom.

[Jestgar]

Sorry. Sounds like your mom is just being a brat.

[GFreeMO]

It is really all about the food. It always has been and always will be. That and we live way out in the country and it takes 45 min. to get here. My Mom and sister are Martha Stewart/Paula Dean and I just can't eat that way.

My Mom and I use to go shopping ALL the time and we would always go out to lunch. In the 2 years I have had celiac, we haven't been once because of the lunch.

[pricklypear1971]

It is really all about the food. It always has been and always will be. That and we live way out in the country and it takes 45 min. to get here. My Mom and sister are Martha Stewart/Paula Dean and I just can't eat that way.

I love your choices of comparisons, especially given the recent press.

[kareng]

I agree with Jess.

I would love it if my sister would have everyone to her house for a holiday! I would happiliy bring my own food and a dish to share. Right now, everyone comes to my house & I have to make everything & make sure the house is sorta of clean. Lucky for me my teenage boys & hub can cook.

[Metoo]

I agree with Jess.

I would love it if my sister would have everyone to her house for a holiday! I would happiliy bring my own food and a dish to share. Right now, everyone comes to my house & I have to make everything & make sure the house is sorta of clean. Lucky for me my teenage boys & hub can cook.

Next time I would avoid having so much of a discussion about it. Invite everyone over, tell them you will be making a wonderful dinner. If they ask, say I am making a roast, pie, potatoes (or whatever). Let that be it. If she says "EW! No oil or onions...blah blah" Then just say I will make sure and to accomidate you, I know how difficult it is to eat while avoiding many typical ingredients.

Kill them with kindness and vagueness. If they don't want to eat whatever you have made, that is fine, but they will still be there.

[kwylee]

OK, got it...the food is important - and it seems that you are really most upset that they won't come to you and you feel left out. But there must be things you can make that don't include olive oil or rice milk.

You seem to indicate that you and your Mom were very close at one point, with all the lunches. It also seems that you are really (understandably) sad about not having children and now it's Celiac again messing with your life and relationships, making you feel shut out. It makes sense that your Mom might even unconsciously gravitate toward where the grand kids are - not saying it's right (or even true) but just acknowledging the possibility, and you may be feeling that too. And that's got to hurt. But your Mom, or even your sister, may not realize how much this is hurting you on so many levels. Is is possible for a heart to heart with your Mom? She may not realize how much her little "ew" comments drive a wedge in your relationship.

[GFreeMO]

Thanks for all of the good advice. There are things that I can make without olive oil and rice milk. My Mom was asking about what we were going to do about a cake. I offered to make a crustless pumpkin pie and she was asking me how I do that and I mentioned the rice milk. The olive oil I have to use to coat the bottom of the pan so the roast beef wont stick. It's about 2 TBSP. She said she cant stand that taste. Believe me, I try!

Thanks everyone.

[MJ-S]

How about using a lighter cooking oil, like sunflower oil? The taste shoudn't be as strong as olive oil.

[ciamarie]

How about using a lighter cooking oil, like sunflower oil? The taste shoudn't be as strong as olive oil.

Or extra light olive oil? That's what I use almost exclusively. It's very neutral. Or Canola? Though I do sympathise on feeling left out, it pretty much stinks.

[Laurentru]

Sending good thoughts your way! It really does suck to be left out, especially when you are willing to go out of your way to meet everyone's needs.

[love2travel]

I am frustrated with you. Take a look at this wonderful layer cake. It is easy to make and tastes divine. Very moist AND meets all your requirements. It calls for either olive or veg oil (you'd think in a cake she wouldn't notice!), no dairy, no corn, no soy... I have made it many times for guests who would not have known it was gluten free but for my celiac. Believe me - I am an avid baker and this one is a winner. The buttercream is awesome (does not even use butter!). Just look at the picture - who could resist THAT?

Open Original Shared Link

Would you like some dairy, soy, corn, gluten free-meal ideas? I literally spend most of my time in the kitchen.

[GFreeMO]

I am frustrated with you. Take a look at this wonderful layer cake. It is easy to make and tastes divine. Very moist AND meets all your requirements. It calls for either olive or veg oil (you'd think in a cake she wouldn't notice!), no dairy, no corn, no soy... I have made it many times for guests who would not have known it was gluten free but for my celiac. Believe me - I am an avid baker and this one is a winner. The buttercream is awesome (does not even use butter!). Just look at the picture - who could resist THAT?

Open Original Shared Link

Would you like some dairy, soy, corn, gluten free-meal ideas? I literally spend most of my time in the kitchen.

That cake looks delish! I can't use xanthan gum though. It's corn based. Yes, I would love some ideas! Thanks

[love2travel]

That cake looks delish! I can't use xanthan gum though. It's corn based. Yes, I would love some ideas! Thanks

Sorry for my ignorance. Does guar gum contain corn?

[GFreeMO]

No worries! Who would have known. I learned the hard way. Not sure on guar gum. I need to google that one.

[love2travel]

How about a nice, homey meatloaf? It can be done gluten, corn, dairy, soy, onion, olive oil and garlic free! Whew! What a mouthful.

BTW - I know what you mean about the children thing. We don't have children, either, (dumb celiac) so it sometimes seems that we get visited less. Not by my family but friends of family. They always want to see the babies. I don't blame them but come see us! We'll feed you good food!

Back to food. Meatloaf is best with onions and garlic but just leave them out. I like to use a ration of 75% beef to 25% pork for best texture and flavour.

Are red peppers allowed? You can finely dice them or even sundried tomatoes, sautee in some oil other than olive - just an oil such as grapeseed or vegetable. Meanwhile, soak some gluten-free bread cubes in some beef or vegetable broth until sopping. (It is normal to soak in milk but just pick something else.) Wait a minute - why not soak dried mushrooms and use the mushroom juice as flavouring? I do that with other things. Then you can even mince them and sautee with the red pepper (to make up for not having onion and garlic). Make sure the sauteed stuff cools before adding it to the meat. So, add that and the soaked bread to the meat and season liberally with S and P. I also grate in some fresh nutmeg. It doesn't taste like nutmeg in the meatloaf but just gives it a wonderful flavour. I wouldn't use powdered. Fresh nutmegs are extremely inexpensive. You will likely need to bind with an egg or two. You don't want it to be loose but fairly tight. Try not to over-mix with your hands if you can help it.

Form into a log onto a sheet pan. This is the way most chefs do it. One reason is you can glaze all sides except the bottom; the meat cooks evenly and you can drain off the fat (i.e. it doesn't cook in its fat as it would in a muffin tin or loaf pan).

Glaze? Is there a safe ketchup you can have? If so, mix some ketchup, ground mustard and brown sugar into a bowl and glaze the meat with it. I make enough to do it a few times so it caramelizes and gets all yummy. I add Worcestershire but I am not sure if you can have that. Can you? If so, definitely add some. Can't do this glaze? Don't worry - you can do others such as simply liquefying some of your favourite jams, marmalades or preserves with a touch of wine or even apple juice or citrus. Just spread on. If you can have ketchup you can add some of that to it, too, along with some mustard. If you can't do these let me know - I have several other ideas.

As many mashed potato recipes are out, serve with oven-roasted sweet potato fries or smashed potatoes. All you do is parboil fingerlings or small potatoes; roast in oven with an oil other than olive with yummy herbs such as rosemary and/or thyme and eat as is. OR you can take them out and smash them almost flat and put them back in to become crispy. Throw on some chives.

I have many more ideas but don't want to take up sooooo much space. Do you like pork? Lamb? Chicken? What is your favourite protein? I can come up with some awesome meal plans.

[love2travel]

No worries! Who would have known. I learned the hard way. Not sure on guar gum. I need to google that one.

You know, I bet you could make it without. Do you happen to have psyllium fibre husks? I find them at the health food store and in one of our grocery stores. I add that and a bit of gelatin - that can sometimes be a good replacement. In fact, you technically do not need a gum for cakes and cookies (but you do in yeast breads, etc.).

You could even make this recipe into cupcakes and frost them and even freeze some for later.

[MitziG]

It is really all about the food. It always has been and always will be. That and we live way out in the country and it takes 45 min. to get here. My Mom and sister are Martha Stewart/Paula Dean and I just can't eat that way.

My Mom and I use to go shopping ALL the time and we would always go out to lunch. In the 2 years I have had celiac, we haven't been once because of the lunch.

I suggest you ask Martha and Paula to come over to your house for a cooking day. Make it a family project. Explain how difficult learnign to cook this way is, and you could really use their expertise. Flattery will get you everywhere!

[kareng]

Gluten-Free! I forgot! I'm about 2 hours (?) away from you! I'll eat that dinner, olive oil & rice milk, and all!

[finally diagnosed]

Thanks for all of the good advice. There are things that I can make without olive oil and rice milk. My Mom was asking about what we were going to do about a cake. I offered to make a crustless pumpkin pie and she was asking me how I do that and I mentioned the rice milk. The olive oil I have to use to coat the bottom of the pan so the roast beef wont stick. It's about 2 TBSP. She said she cant stand that taste. Believe me, I try!

Thanks everyone.

how about cooking the roast on a roasting rack (involves no oils or sprays ) make them some betty crocker gluten free cupcakes or cake and make something that you can eat for dessert as well or ice cream. when i cook for my extended family for holidays or get togethers i always make sure my meal is gluten free / never give up ingredients or how i cooked it (unless someone has serious allergy) but i make sure there are things we can all eat. I am sorry your Mom is so defiant about coming over ( olive oil ) but I am wondering if you sister cooks with olive oil and doesn't mention it to mom.. ????? good luck

[GFreeMO]

You know, I bet you could make it without. Do you happen to have psyllium fibre husks? I find them at the health food store and in one of our grocery stores. I add that and a bit of gelatin - that can sometimes be a good replacement. In fact, you technically do not need a gum for cakes and cookies (but you do in yeast breads, etc.).

You could even make this recipe into cupcakes and frost them and even freeze some for later.

Thanks for all of your help! Meatloaf is a wonderful suggestion! That cake looks delish too! I wouldn't know where to find any of those things around here though. I live in a tony town and the nearest big grocery store is 25 min away and they don't have a gluten free section at all.

[GFreeMO]

Gluten-Free! I forgot! I'm about 2 hours (?) away from you! I'll eat that dinner, olive oil & rice milk, and all!

LOL thanks Karen.

[GFreeMO]

Thanks everyone! We've decided to go to my sisters house and I am going to bring my own food. She said that she didn't invite us at first because she feels bad eating in front of me. Thats awful.

Anyway..thanks!!

[Jestgar]

Thanks everyone! We've decided to go to my sisters house and I am going to bring my own food. She said that she didn't invite us at first because she feels bad eating in front of me. Thats awful.

Anyway..thanks!!

Bring the most amazingly tasty looking food you can come up with - including some luscious desert. Then sigh while you're chowing down and say "yep..... gluten-free food......"